


Butterfly Effect

by Bass_Line



Category: Six - Marlow/Moss
Genre: Attempted Rape/Non-Con, College AU, F/F, It also means that Jane and Anne ARE related too, Jane and Katherine ARE related in this story, Mentioned Past Sexual Abuse, Past Rape/Non-con, Second Cousin Romantic Relationship
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-08-06
Updated: 2020-12-31
Packaged: 2021-03-06 01:15:12
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 22
Words: 121,848
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25744945
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Bass_Line/pseuds/Bass_Line
Summary: A chance meeting, that was all it took for their paths to merge.
Relationships: Anne Boleyn/Catherine of Aragon, Anne of Cleves/Catherine Parr, Jane Seymour/Katherine Howard
Comments: 19
Kudos: 130





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Disclaimer: Jane, Anne and Katherine are all related to each other in this story. At the end of each chapter, there might be some questions for you to think about similar to the questions seen at the end of every book done for Literature.

"Look, I've been there for you whenever you're dealing with all that shit with Henry! The least you can do is to go out with me!" Katherine could feel herself tearing up, she genuinely believed that Thomas was a good friend. She couldn't believe that she was terribly wrong again, he was so sincere and nice after all. He had been there for her when she broke up with her ex, and provided her emotional assurance afterwards. Hearing Thomas demand a relationship broke her heart, he wasn't the man she thought she knew. He pushed the girl to the ground, looming over her as she landed painfully. "Damn it slut, I didn't do all those things just for you to say no!"

"I-I…" Katherine couldn't speak, learning that he was the same as the other men in her life was too much of a shock for her to defend herself. She couldn't even utter a reply to the horrifying revelation. Thomas raised his hand, about to slap the first-year in retaliation from being rebuffed. She closed her eyes, bracing for the stinging pain shortly after. A sound rang out, but she didn't feel any pain. Katherine slowly opened her eyes, a different shadow cast over her and a woman squaring off against Thomas.

"Sir, please leave the premises immediately." The woman spoke, her left cheek a bright red from being slapped by Thomas. Her words were calm, yet radiated menacing fury as her grey eyes glared daggers at the man. Thomas scoffed, what right did she have for interfering? The woman sensed that he wasn't planning to leave any time soon, and doubled down harder in response. "I will not repeat myself, please leave immediately."

"I attend this university, I have every right to be here!"

"Would you like me to call security and inform them about harassing this woman?" Thomas scowled, the last thing he needed was security meddling in his personal affairs. As someone who used to hang out with Henry, he was no stranger to how much authority they could wield when students were causing trouble. With a huff, he stalked off and left the woman alone with Katherine, who was shedding silent tears. "Are you alright?"

"... Thank you." The woman offered a hand to help Katherine up, an offer that the first-year took up on. Soon, she was on her feet with only a few scratches on her knees. Her grey eyes reflected kindness, mildly surprising Katherine. "I… um… I'm really sorry that you have to intervene…"

"Don't apologise, no one should have to go through that." The woman smiled, placing a friendly hand on Katherine's shoulder. Katherine flinched at the touch, and the woman immediately retracted her hand. "My apologies, I didn't mean to make you uncomfortable."

"I was just surprised, that's all..." Katherine trailed off, wondering if she should invite the woman for coffee. It was the least she could do after being saved from Thomas, and the way the woman's grey eyes flickered with emotion intrigued her. Katherine reasoned that it was enough reason to befriend her, hell, she could count the number of female friends she had with one hand, and if her instinct was right, the woman before her would prove to be a good friend. Even though she didn't trust the woman who saved her that much. "A-Are you free? For coffee? I mean, it's the least I could do since you saved me…"

"Coffee sounds great… but I actually have a class to get to. Sorry about that, may I get your name though?" The woman apologised, her grey eyes betraying regret for turning down Katherine's offer. Katherine smiled in response, if anything, she felt bad for making the woman risk being late for class. That didn't mean that she wasn't disappointed though.

"It's Katherine, with a 'k'! Though honestly, that only matters when it's on paper."

"It's nice meeting you Katherine, I really have to get going. I'll be seeing you soon." With that, the woman broke into a sprint and left the area. Katherine frowned, she wasn't able to ask for the woman's name. She sighed, she stood out among the crowd thanks to her height and her dyed hair, so she reasoned that she could trust the woman's words that they would see each other soon.

She picked up her purse, her fingers brushing against a plastic card that didn't belong to her. A small picture of her saviour was on the card, her expression stern in comparison to the smile she saw minutes ago. Katherine blinked, picking up the card and examining it closely. She realised that it was the woman's student identity card, with her essential details and her major imprinted on it.

_'Jane Seymour… fourth-year major in Education? She looks around my age though. Wait, how am I going to return this to her?'_

* * *

**[that boleyn girl]**

_**[3.08 PM]** _

**katsitter:** hey cuz u kno everyone rite?

 **that boleyn girl:** sorta

 **that boleyn girl:** why?

 **katsitter:** i need help finding someone

 **that boleyn girl:** np u hv a name?

 **katsitter:** jane seymour

 **that boleyn girl:** R U SRS?????

 **that boleyn girl:** U WANT ME TO HELP U TRACK DOWN THE BITCH HENRY CHEATED WITH??????

 **katsitter:** shes the one u got into a fight with????

 **that boleyn girl:** NO SHIT

 **katsitter:** i just wanna return something to her…

 **that boleyn girl:** urgh

 **that boleyn girl:** i could talk shit abt her to draw her out if u wanna??

 **katsitter:** oh hell no

 **katsitter:** there has to be another way

 **that boleyn girl:** orrrrrrr i can hook u up with her bro?

 **that boleyn girl:** not xrated way btw

 **katsitter:** gd

 **katsitter:** who is he?

 **that boleyn girl:** thomas seymour

 **katsitter:** never heard of him

 **that boleyn girl:** uhhhhhh i think he dated a catherine

 **that boleyn girl:** catherine parr maybe???

 **katsitter:** wait rlly?

 **katsitter:** i kno a catherine parr!

 **that boleyn girl:** i said maybe

 **that boleyn girl:** im legit not sure abt this

 **katsitter:** tks cuz ur the best

 **that boleyn girl:** help me tell her tht i still hate her

 **katsitter:** no

**[Regrets &Coffee]**

_**[3.20 PM]** _

**katsitter:** hi tattoo buddy!

 **Regrets &Coffee: **Hey, planning on getting another tattoo already?

 **katsitter:** not at the moment!

 **Regrets &Coffee: **Oh okay, my skin can't take another one for a few weeks anyways.

 **Regrets &Coffee: **So if not tattoos then…?

 **katsitter:** is it true tht u dated jane seymours bro?

 **Regrets &Coffee: **Only for three weeks, but yeah we're exes.

 **Regrets &Coffee: **Wait, are we doing the thing with you asking me if it's okay to date my ex?

 **Regrets &Coffee: **Because if you are, I don't mind in theory but you're really better off not dating him.

 **Regrets &Coffee: **Seriously, trust me on this.

 **katsitter:** uhhhhhhh nope

 **katsitter:** i actually want to return janes student id

 **Regrets &Coffee: **Just so that we're on the same page, you mean Jane Seymour right?

 **katsitter:** mmhm

 **Regrets &Coffee: **That makes more sense, her brother is absolutely disgusting.

 **Regrets &Coffee: **She mentioned over chat that she lost her ID just now, good thing you found it.

 **katsitter:** yep yep can u return her id to her?

 **Regrets &Coffee:** Damn, I wish I could but I'm rushing a thesis.

 **Regrets &Coffee: **How about this? I'll give you her address and you just return it to her yourself?

 **Regrets &Coffee:** Her class today ends at 6, so just drop by around 6.15?

 **katsitter:** can i namedrop u so tht she dun think im dodgy af?

 **Regrets &Coffee: **Sure, meanwhile I'll inform her that you'll be visiting her place.

 **Regrets &Coffee: **She'll want to meet at the block where all her classes are, but it's one hell of a maze so no worries on that front.

 **Regrets &Coffee: **Funny enough, she won't usually want to meet at the campus cafes.

 **Regrets &Coffee: **The coffee here's passable, no matter what she says.

 **Regrets &Coffee: **Update - She says that she'll be rushing back home after her last class to catch you.

 **katsitter:** tks ur a lifesaver!

 **Regrets &Coffee: **Just treat me to some of my life blood, I need all the caffeine.

 **katsitter:** lol nope ur going on a coffee diet

Katherine hummed as Catherine sent her a message with Jane's address, frowning soon after as she realised that the address was quite a distance from the flat she shared with a friend and her cousin. Shrugging, she made her way to her next class while looking up the fastest way to get to the address listed.

* * *

"Katherine! How long have you been here?" The first-year smiled politely as the woman approached her, her blonde hair slightly messed up as though she had just run a marathon. "I'm so sorry that Cathy made you come all the way here, we could've met at a cafe on campus- wait no, the coffee served on campus is basically tar. Actually, we could've met somewhere nearer to your classrooms…"

"It's fine! I kinda looked up the campus map, and the education block's on the other end of the school and it's way too far from mine. I'll probably get lost too, I still can't figure my way around the common areas." Katherine replied, rummaging through her purse and fishing out Jane's card. She handed it to her senior, who was relieved to see it. "I'm sorry, I saw the details on the card."

"It's fine, I'm glad that you returned it to me." Jane examined her card, a hesitant smile slowly forming on her lips. She shoved her card into her purse, and pulled out a ring of keys shortly after. "... Do you want to come inside for a cup of coffee? I believe we took a raincheck earlier."

"Oh, I wouldn't want to impose…"

"It's really not a problem, I'm trying to get rid of the coffee at home. Cathy's seriously addicted to it and I'm trying to get her to cut down."

"If that's the case, then I'll take you up on your offer." Katherine knew that she shouldn't be entering the houses of people she only knew for less than a day, but she couldn't help taking up Jane's offer. Besides, both her cousin and her friend knew the woman, she figured that she should be fine. Jane nodded, unlocking the door and beckoning the first-year inside. Katherine observed the interior, it was filled with basic necessities and the walls were all white. It reminded her of a doctor's office, cold and sterile, yet the woman who chose the decorations and wall colours was clearly anything but that. "It's very clean, I wish my roommates were good at cleaning up."

"Oh… thank you. I live alone, so I try not to make much mess since I'm the one cleaning up." Jane responded, filling up a kettle with water and placing it to boil. She opened up a cabinet, taking out two sachets of coffee powder and placed it on the table as she waited for the water to boil. "How do you know Cathy?"

"We met in a tattoo parlour! I thought she was the tattoo artist because she gave off an artsy vibe."

"I… see." Katherine sensed that Jane was uncomfortable with the topic, as evident with the slight pause as well as how her body froze up when tattoos were mentioned. "I apologise, I didn't mean to have such a reaction. I'm just… not used to talking about these topics."

"What topics are you used to then?"

"... Are you religious by any chance?"

"No, my family doesn't believe in them. Daddy once said 'fuck God'. Which… I probably shouldn't be saying this. Not to you at least?"

"I don't mind, people have different opinions and we should respect them. Of course, the sentiment could be worded more appropriately. It's something that I'm still trying to grasp, and something that I should since we're now university students." Jane gently chuckled, the kettle emitting a shrill sound to signal that the water was boiled. She grabbed two mugs, pouring the powder into them before pouring the boiled water. "Milk or sugar?"

"Sugar sounds great!" Katherine had a sweet tooth, though not as much as her cousin. Her roommate warned them about diabetes as well as cavities, but they didn't care. Besides, they work out often so it was fine. Probably. "Have you always wanted to be a teacher?"

"Hmm, I guess so. Everyone tells me that… well, that I'm good at teaching, and the idea of seeing students understand concepts makes me happy. I had fun teaching last year, although I hope to never deal with fires ever again."

"That sounds cool! I'm not good at anything, I'm pretty sure I'm the only one in my major that doesn't have prior knowledge." Jane frowned, providing Katherine with her mug of coffee that she gratefully accepted. Katherine briefly felt exposed when she accepted the drink, and chose to lower her guard slightly to ease her mild discomfort. "Thanks for the coffee! People say that autumn's a pleasant time to sleep but it's real cold. I'm not gonna survive winter honestly."

"Everyone's good at something, whether they're aware of it or not. So don't say that you're not good at anything, because you are." Katherine bit her lip, she couldn't admit that she was extremely good at attracting guys, it wasn't something that she wanted to be particularly good at, especially given her past history with men. Not that she wanted to admit that to someone she just met. "What are you majoring in?"

"Theatre, though I'm looking at being a drama educator after graduation. Looks aren't forever after all." Katherine took a sip of her coffee, smiling faintly as the warmth spread throughout her body. It was partially her fault for not wearing something warmer than a black t-shirt and tights, but she was required to wear all black as well as cover up with comfortable materials promoting flexibility for her theatre practicals. "I'm a pretty rotten actress if I do say so myself."

"Everything's hard when you're starting out. Why, one of my friends still has a hard time grasping some concepts even though she's in her final year." Katherine wondered what she did in her past life to deserve a beautiful woman offering her kind words of reassurance, all she did was to return a student identity card that could be easily replaced. "Speaking of which, which year are you in?"

"It's my first year, and I'm still getting lost on campus despite being over two months now."

"That would explain why you didn't recognise me…" Jane muttered, her grey eyes widening with realisation after discovering that Katherine had heard her. She flashed a brief smile, rushing to explain. "Apologies, you could say that I'm… well-remembered ever since a certain event during my second year."

"If anything, I was expecting people to remember you for your kindness." Katherine was aware that she was being naive, but she truly felt that way. Jane was nothing but kind to her, especially so considering that they were nothing more than mere strangers, acquaintances at best. Not just that, but Jane had been kind to her even though Katherine was sure that she had been giving off the impression that she didn't fully trust the woman. Jane tucked a lock of hair behind her flushed ear, the only indication that she was embarrassed at being complimented. _'Ah fuck this, if I have to trust some stranger, might as well trust a pretty woman with magnetic grey eyes. Yep, sounds like the start of a horror film but what the hell.'_

"Well, I can safely say that I'm most remembered for my fight with Anne Boleyn. While she started the fight, the reasons were all on me. That being said, I don't particularly hold her in high regard." Katherine nodded, remembering how her cousin constantly ranted to her about her fight with 'that uppity religious slut'. She never once bothered to remember the exact details, the last thing she wanted was for Anne to spend two hours explaining why she started the fight. "I should thank her, I found out that my ex was cheating on her with me back then… though I really should have broken up with him sooner."

"You said 'reasons'... so was there more than one or…?"

"Oh yes, I called her a derogatory term used to describe women who are romantically attracted to women as well as physically harming her. Not my finest moment, and that incident truly highlighted that I was raised in… an intolerant household, so to speak." Jane sounded sincere, and while Katherine could have simply admitted that she was Anne's cousin, she decided not to. All she wanted was to have a mug of coffee with the person who intervened when Thomas was starting to get aggressive. "Is pink your favourite colour?"

"Yep! My aunt and uncle didn't want me to dye my hair with bright colours, but my cousin sweet-talked them into agreeing. The compromise was that I can't dye it _completely_ pink, hence why only half of it is dyed!"

"Self-expression is indeed important. It must be hard maintaining your hair."

"Kinda, but all the more I appreciate my hair y'know?" Katherine soon felt at ease with Jane, who constantly offered her sincere smiles and genuine interest in the conversation despite the discomfort with some topics. "Are you free this Friday? My roommates are doing this small scale dinner party-ish thing and we're supposed to bring a female plus-one… and I don't have many female friends."

"I don't see why not, I'm chuffed really." Jane replied, glancing at a clock hung on the wall. "It's 20 minutes to seven, do you live far from here?"

"Oh fuck, they're gonna kill me if I don't get them dinner by 7.30! I'm sorry, I have to leave before they go off at me." Katherine apologised, gulping down her coffee before making her way to the door. Jane quickly followed after her, handing her a scrap of paper with a string of numbers on it. "What's that?"

"My number, text me the details of that dinner soon?" Katherine laughed breathlessly, she couldn't believe that she had forgotten to get Jane's number despite inviting her to a dinner party that wasn't planned. She grabbed the piece of paper and unlocked the door, dashing out of the house and nearly tripping over her feet as she made her way to the nearest bus stop. Jane watched as her junior left, her grey eyes sparkling with interest as Katherine boarded the first bus that pulled over. _'Her energy's infectious... no wonder she's friends with Cathy.'_

* * *

**[haus of holbein!!!]**

_**[7.26 PM]** _

**KweenCleves:** katttttt r u coming hm soon?

 **KweenCleves:** im hungryyy

 **that boleyn girl:** annas srsly considering cooking dinner tonite

 **that boleyn girl:** like legit srs

 **katsitter:** ok ok i hv kfc

 **KweenCleves:** again??

 **the boleyn girl:** kitty likes kfc…

 **that boleyn girl:** can we at least hv bangers n mash tmr?

 **katsitter:** go buy em urself thn

 **katsitter:** anyways can u both bring a female fren for fridays dinner?

 **KweenCleves:** uh why

 **katsitter:** i maybe invited jane over to dinner on friday under the pretext tht we r hving a small dinner party with close frens?

 **that boleyn girl:** U WHAT?????

 **katsitter:** im not gonna copy paste tht

 **that boleyn girl:** U KNOW WE HV HISTORY

 **that boleyn girl:** N NOT THE SEXY KIND

 **that boleyn girl:** OR THE KIND THT I STUDY

 **katsitter:** i kno but i want to talk with her more!

 **katsitter:** plsssssss?

 **katsitter:** i can do ur laundry for tmr

 **that boleyn girl:** … whole week

 **katsitter:** fine but any xrated stains n deals off

 **KweenCleves:** gurl u srs

 **KweenCleves:** u srsly want to wash her holbein corsets?

 **that boleyn girl:** anna i dun wear corsets i wear sexy underwear

 **that boleyn girl:** besides u kno our history with holbeins

 **KweenCleves:** lol tru

 **that boleyn girl:** i think i can drag a female for fridays dinner

 **KweenCleves:** ooh any females u can spare me?

 **that boleyn girl:** hahahahaha no

 **KweenCleves:** u suck

 **katsitter:** someone open the door or else kfc goes yeet

 **KweenCleves:** OK OK DUN YEET OUR DINNER LIKE THE LAST TIME

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> 1\. Should Jane have stepped in to help Katherine?
> 
> 2\. Will you choose to trust someone that saved you from a sticky situation, why or why not?


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A repeat of the disclaimer in Chapter 1, Jane, Katherine and Anne are all related to each other and there might be questions at the end of each questions for you to think/reflect on.

"Here you go, your usual." Anna sighed, serving a cup of coffee to the cafe's only regular as well as customer. She wasn't sure what the exact order was, but the customer didn't care as long as she had some caffeine in her. All the coffee types were of the same price, only the pricings for the sizes differed anyways. "You actually like the toilet water they serve on campus?"

"When you're sleep-deprived, shit tastes like ambrosia. But yes, I'm a slut for coffee." The regular laughed, handing Anna the exact amount of money for the coffee. Anna may not know the regular's name, but she loved talking to her. It was one of the few respites she had working part-time at one of the campus's many cafes, the others being free pastries and coffee (which no one save for the regular really liked). "You look more gutted than usual, manager forced you to work overtime again?"

"Nah, one of my roommates suddenly sprang the idea of having dinner with a female friend because she's… well, now I have to bring a female friend to dinner on Friday." Anna explained, did Katherine not remember that she had close to zero female friends? Apparently, being a minority in many ways resulted in being shunned. It was 2020, what happened to accepting each other for who they were and not what they looked like? The regular nodded sympathetically, taking an indulgent sip of her drink. "I mean… I don't wanna back out because she's _really_ excited 'bout her new friend that she sorta made."

"I don't want to overstep, but I could go with you? Deadline for my thesis is due tomorrow, which leaves Friday free for me. Plus there's free food, and great company." The regular suggested, surprising Anna. She didn't expect the offer, especially since they were strangers. "Catherine Parr, third year majoring in English. Nice to meet you Anna."

"How do you know my name?" Catherine chuckled, gesturing to the name tag attached on Anna's uniform. Anna rubbed the back of her neck, grinning bashfully. "Right. Um, I'm Anna von Cleves, second year major in Astronomy."

"It's funny how both of our names belong to two of Henry VIII's wives." Catherine pointed out, with Anna nodding in agreement. Sure, the fourth wife's name was really Anna von Kleve and that was also technically her name, had it not been for the government screwing her surname up. "What time should I show up for dinner on Friday?"

"No idea, I'll get back to you soon? Oh, we should probably exchange contacts…?" Anna held her phone out for Catherine to swap, both of them inputting each other's contacts in the devices. The phones were swapped back, and Catherine's phone lit up with a message. "You're a busy woman."

"True, but this time it's from a slightly high maintenance friend of mine. I'll be hearing from you soon then." Catherine said, briskly making her way out of the cafe while Anna was left behind to clean up. The late afternoon was always the slowest for the cafe since her roommates both had afternoon classes and other than Catherine, only those two would drop by. Anna let out a yawn, she was starting to understand Katherine's excitement over making a new friend.

_'I should probably ask the manager if I could bring back some doughnuts for dinner… knowing Anne, she's gonna enter a right fit if I don't give her something sweet for the day.'_

* * *

"Hey bitch, you don't have a class to get to?" Anne yawned, stretching her arms while a woman glared back at her while getting dressed, clearly displeased that Anne was still in her bed. "What? You know I'm not a morning person."

"Bloody hell, get out already." The woman scowled, tossing Anne's clothes to her with a huff. Anne giggled, she loved stomping on the woman's toes. The woman groaned, rolling her eyes as she threw open the curtains, the sunlight blinding Anne. "C'mon Bo-loser, it's eight in the morning."

"Alright, alright. Don't get your knickers in a twist…" Anne grumbled, Friday mornings were the worst and the woman was deliberately making it worse for her. Anne rolled out of bed, landing on the floor with an unceremonious thud. "Ow, fuck."

"Yeah yeah, get up before my roommate discovers that you're not _just_ a one night stand." Anne smirked, getting up to her feet and posing for the world outside the room to see. The woman hurriedly closed the curtains, levelling a glare at Anne. "Seriously?! What the fuck?!"

"What? I'm sexy! I broke England from the church!"

"Having the same name as Henry VIII's second wife doesn't automatically make you _that_ sexy."

"If I'm not sexy enough to make history, why is our little arrangement still a thing?" The woman sighed, gesturing for Anne to start wearing her clothes. "Aha, Ms Arrogant's finally at a loss for words."

"You never get sick of calling me that huh?"

"Nope, anyways I need a favour from you."

"I'm not attending classes for you again, your major's just not my cup of tea."

"Not that, I need to bring a woman to dinner later. You're the only woman that likes me enough to not kick my arse to the kerb and I don't wanna disappoint Kitty, so help me out?" The woman sighed, as much as she wanted to refuse Anne, she knew how much Anne loved Katherine. It was hard not to, Katherine was someone that you couldn't help protecting whether you knew her or not. "Please? Kitty says that it starts at seven and she's bringing that uppity religious slut and I probs need you as a mediator."

"Uppity… does she not know about your history with Jane? You two hate each other."

"Knowing Kitty? She left the cousin bit out while they were flirting."

"Oh for… fine, you're lucky that Kat's a sweetheart." The woman relented, much to Anne's delight. Within 15 minutes, Anne had gotten herself dressed to show her gratitude towards her… well, Anne wasn't sure what they were now, but it was definitely more than mere one night stands. "You two are still living together at the same address right?"

"Yep, I'll make it up to you soon."

"Make it up to me by hitting the door on your way out."

"You're just jealous that your door's sexier than you."

* * *

"Okay, whose idea was it to cook dinner?!" Anne exclaimed as she watched a pot combust into flames, with Katherine and Anna pointing fingers at each other. They had barely an hour to prepare for their dinner with their friends, and it was going poorly. "You two know that we _all_ suck at cooking right?! Can't we just get takeout?!"

"I wanna impress Jane!"

"Well, _I_ want to impress my friend whom I totally didn't befriend two days ago! Besides, I scored us some doughnuts!"

"And I _don't_ want to eat coal for dinner! Bloody hell Anna, what have I said about us cooking?!"

"Hey! Kat's also at fault here, why am I the only one taking the heat?! Also, doughnuts!"

"She's my adorable cousin that can't do any wrong even though she totally just did. That, and eating doughnuts for dinner is plain sad." Anne groaned, now she had to beg her plus-one to come over earlier and save their dinner. She didn't like owing too many favours, one was far too many in her opinion. "You two, put out the fire while I text my plus-one to help us cook."

**[Mentally Dead]**

_**[5.47 PM]** _

**that boleyn girl:** hey bitch i rlly need ur help

 **Mentally Dead:** You don't sound like you need help

 **that boleyn girl:** it involves ur dinner later

 **Mentally Dead:** Have we not established that you can't cook?!

 **that boleyn girl:** kitty n anna tried to cook

 **that boleyn girl:** now we hv a fire on our hands

 **Mentally Dead:** Oh for fuck's sake

 **Mentally Dead:** Look, I can only get there at 1815 earliest

 **that boleyn girl:** fuck

 **that boleyn girl:** kittys rlly looking fwd to dinner tho

 **Mentally Dead:** Don't guilt trip me, I'm attending a lecture now

 **Mentally Dead:** I can get you guys some dessert though

 **that boleyn girl:** wht abt dinner???

 **Mentally Dead:** Go buy it yourself?

 **Mentally Dead:** Those two can be trusted to extinguish a fire right?

 **that boleyn girl:** okokok is tht slut gd with fast food?

 **Mentally Dead:** She eats them, but I think she prefers home cooked food

 **that boleyn girl:** FUCK

 **Mentally Dead:** Just cook some pasta

 **Mentally Dead:** Hell, even pasta sauce is available in stores

 **that boleyn girl:** my wallets weeping

 **Mentally Dead:** OH COME ON YOU'RE NOT POOR

 **that boleyn girl:** fiiiiine

 **that boleyn girl:** can u get us cheesecake?

 **Mentally Dead:** Why? Jane's favourite dessert isn't cheesecake

 **that boleyn girl:** i feel like eating cheesecake ngl

 **Mentally Dead:** Fuck you

"Good news, we're getting free dessert!" Her two roommates cheered, with Katherine throwing the fire extinguisher at the flaming pot while Anna threw water at it. The fire roared, and Anna quickly used the dented extinguisher to put out the fire. "Bad news, we have to buy pasta and serve it for dinner."

"Ooh, can we get penne this time?"

"You mind getting some bratwursts from the store? Think they're on sale at this time of year."

"Fine, you two are paying me later though." Anne grumbled, grabbing a coat hanging on the rack and storming out of their house. Katherine and Anna gave each other a look, and the pot soon combusted into flames once more.

"Oh hell no, I'm not putting it out again." Anna declared as she handed the extinguisher to Katherine, who was pretending to be too busy to help her roommate with the fire. "Kat!"

"Okay okay!" Katherine yelped, grabbing the extinguisher and chucking it at the pot a second time. The fire grew, scaring the girl. "Why's the fire not getting smaller?!"

"You fucking threw the tin at it! You're supposed to squeeze these bars down! Did they not teach you this in secondary school?!"

"We don't learn that here! That's a German thing!"

"I moved here when I was five!" While they were arguing, the fire steadily grew until it became too hot for either of them to ignore. They both gulped, how were they going to put it out when they failed to do so once? "Kat, go fill the bathtub with water!"

"Got it!" Katherine left for the bathroom, the sound of water running at full blast comforting Anna somewhat. She grabbed a pair of oven mitts and a mask that was lying around in the kitchen for some reason. Anna winced, the heat was even more unbearable given the mask. "Why do we need the tub?"

"I'm tossing this flaming hunk of metal into the tub and pray that the tub's not gonna be on fire!" Anna knew that there were better ways to extinguish the fire, but she couldn't think under time constraints. Besides, if they couldn't extinguish it normally the first time, it was certainly impossible to do so a second time. "Kat! Is the tub done?!"

"It's half full!" Anna grimaced, it would have to do. Grabbing the handles of the pot, she made a beeline for the bathroom. Katherine immediately stepped aside upon seeing the mini fireball, wincing as Anna dumped the pot into the water. The fireball fizzled out, hissing as water engulfed it. "Oh god… we did it."

"I'm back! I bought a pot since I figured that it's burnt beyond repair or something!" Anna and Katherine rushed out of the bathroom to greet Anne, who placed paper bags filled with food as well as a shiny pot on the kitchen's counter. "Where's the old one?"

"Don't worry, we did what we had to do!" Katherine forced a smile, and Anna followed suit. They had a feeling that Anne would lose her head if she found out how they extinguished the fire. "So… should we wait for your friend to arrive then get her to cook for us or…?"

"Up to you two, I'm gonna take a bath." The two roommates nodded, forgetting that the pot was still inside the bathtub. The doorbell rang, prompting Katherine to answer the door. She was horrified to see that Jane had turned up earlier than expected, motioning for Anna to do something. Said roommate failed to take the hint, and started dancing awkwardly.

"Oh, am I too early?" Jane asked, glancing at Anna. Katherine turned back, and felt her face flushing with embarrassment at Anna's dancing. Anna shrugged, she didn't know what the first-year was trying to ask her to do after all. Katherine wrenched her sight away from her roommate, grinning at Jane instead. "I can always come back at a later time..."

"Not at all, please do come in while we… um… try not to burn anything." Katherine replied, gesturing Jane to enter their apartment while Anna was still dancing away. Jane nodded politely in Anna's direction, a smile forming as she removed her coat. "I-I can get that! Please, ignore Anna. She's uh… okay I don't know why she's dancing but um… Anna! Get her a drink or help me cook?"

"Actually, is it okay if I make dinner? I really love cooking, and I would be delighted if I can cook dinner for everyone tonight."

"Yes! I-I mean, please do." Katherine breathed a sigh of relief, leading Jane into the kitchen and to her own devices. She made her way back to the living room where Anna was, slumping against the sofa while she watched her roommate dance. "Oh thank god, we have dinner tonight."

"Ja, and now all we have to do is to get rid of the pot before Anne finds out." Anna abruptly stopped her dancing, her brown eyes widened with horror as she recalled Anne's last words to them prior to leaving them alone. "Oh fuck, we left the pot in die Badewanner!"

"... So?"

"Your cousin's planning to take a bath!"

"I mean… the fact that she hasn't screamed bloody murder meant that-" Katherine was cut off by a high-pitched scream and furious stomping coming from the bathroom. Jane, being the concerned woman she was, left the kitchen and was soon face to face with Anne, who was stark naked and was out for blood. "Well, shit. This is not how I wanted to introduce them."

* * *

"You're saying that Anne 'maneater' Boleyn invited you over for dinner?" Catalina sighed, she didn't blame Catherine for expressing surprise. What truly surprised them both was that they were attending the same dinner that Friday night, a revelation that was only discovered when they alighted at the same bus stop. "Didn't your ex cheat on you with her? I'm surprised that you two are friends."

"We're not, we just… I suppose we just use each to de-stress." Catalina averted her eyes away from her roommate, suddenly finding the lift buttons more interesting than Catherine. Catherine nodded silently, her blue eyes widening with horror the moment the lift doors opened.

"You mean all those times you were going at it with-" Catherine was cut off by loud shrieking coming from the unit they were having their dinner at. Catalina shook her head, no doubt it was Anne screaming her head off about something trivial. Hopefully the cheesecake would calm her down, she thought. They made their way to the particular unit, with Catherine knocking on the door with her knuckles. The door opened, the woman greeting them surprised at their arrival. "Seymour? What's going on in there?"

"BOTH OF YOU ARE TWATS! WHY THE FUCK DID YOU DUMP THE DAMN POT INTO THE TUB?!" Anne started to swear at her two roommates, flipping them with both middle fingers. Anna said nothing, while Katherine was notably upset at her cousin yelling her head off for their desperate attempt to extinguish a fire. "GOD DAMN IT, YOU BOTH KNOW THAT NONE OF US CAN COOK SO WHY THE EVER LOVING HELL DID YOUR GRUBBY LITTLE HANDS TOUCH THE FUCKING POT?!"

"Oh, put a sock in it Bo-loser! I highly doubt you helped them extinguish your pet project given that you went out to buy ingredients!" Catalina had enough of Anne, it wasn't as though the latter was completely blameless. She strode past Jane and towards Anne, jabbing a bony finger at Anne's choker. "Now, can we _all_ act mature for this damn dinner and not lose heads the moment something goes pear-shaped?!"

"I feel like Lina's referring to me too…" Jane whispered to Catherine, who shrugged in response. Everyone was silent, the atmosphere was tense enough to cut people. Eventually, Jane broke the silence. As awkward as it was, they were all gathered together to have dinner and she was admittedly hungry and not interested in buying fish and chips for dinner for the fifth time that week. "Let's have dinner and get to know each other? I believe I didn't have the pleasure of meeting everyone yet?"

"Did you add the bratwursts into the pasta? If so, then yeah I'm down for some dinner!" Anna rushed to agree, gently leading Catherine inside and locking the door. The last time they left the door unlocked… Anna shuddered, she didn't wish to remember that night and neither did her roommates. Anne and Catalina glared at each other, before silently making their way to the dining room where six plates of pasta were waiting for them. "Kat, you coming?"

"Y-Yeah." Katherine's voice wavered, she felt that it was all her fault that a fight broke out. At least it wasn't between her cousin and Jane, that was even worse. She made her way to the dining table, with Jane seated diagonally left of her, Catherine opposite her and Anne on her right. She briefly wondered if she was seated between her cousin and her new friend mainly to serve as a buffer between them, but dismissed the thought. "So… Should we introduce ourselves? I think we're all acquainted with each other…"

"No harm in doing so, anything's better than hearing a damn argument. Anyways, I'm Catalina de Aragón-"

"Aren't Spanish names supposed to be long and impossibly difficult to remember?" Anne interrupted, earning herself a sharp glare from the woman whose introduction she interrupted. "Alright sheesh, I'll go look it up later."

"Thank you Bo-loser, as I was saying- wait hold up. Why the fuck are you naked?!"

"Finally! I thought it was a normal thing she did!" Catherine remarked, with Katherine and Anna giving her bewildered looks. Jane was more concerned that Catalina only noticed Anne's lack of clothing now instead of the moment she intervened. "What?! How would I know?!"

"Unless she's plastered, she usually has the decency to wear _something_." Anna laughed, with Anne smirking in response. She winked at Catalina's direction, the response being a growl that hinted at murderous intentions. Jane said nothing, but did her best to not openly stare at the woman she disliked. "Go and change into something Anne, before Kat here loses _her_ head at you."

"Fine, but you gotta admit-" Anne stopped the moment she locked eyes with Katherine, who was mentally pleading with her to wear something and not forcefully sear the image of her cousin in the nude into her mind. Sighing, Anne left the dining room to change.

"As I was saying before she ruined my intro _twice_ , I'm a fourth-year Psychology major. My birthday's on 16 December, and I'm not friends with Bo-loser. We simply have a complicated relationship thanks to her stealing my ex."

"And by 'complicated', you mean enemies with benefits." Catherine asked, being met with a grunt from her roommate. She shrugged, that answer sufficed and she had no plans to dig into their history. "My turn now?"

"Is this decent enough for your virgin eyes or do I have to go change again?" Anne asked, strutting out in Katherine's favourite pink hoodie and a pair of grey shorts that gave everyone a good view of her legs. "Sorry, laundry's not done so I kinda borrowed your hoodie."

"You should probably stop changing so many times next time, I regret doing your laundry now." Katherine replied, with Anne chuckling at the remark as she took her seat. "Cathy's about to give her introduction!"

"Catherine Parr, third-year English major. What else…? I'm Aragón's roommate, and I'm a sucker for coffee. Oh, and I dated Seymour's brother a while back." Catherine said, wondering if she should also mention her birthday. She was about to mention it, but paused upon realising that she had forgotten when it was. "... Aragón, do you remember when's my birthday?"

"12 August. You really should start cutting down on the coffee, the caffeine's starting to affect your memory…" Catalina commented, with Jane and Katherine nodding in enthusiastic agreement. Catherine grumbled, she liked coffee and her friends won't stop her from getting her daily fix. "Jane, your turn."

"Hello, I'm Jane Seymour. I'm majoring in Education and I'm in my final year. I did a practical year last year as a teaching assistant in a secondary school and I learnt a lot from it. My birthday is in May, I think it's the 30th?"

"Why can't both my friends remember their own birthdays?" Catalina groaned, she made it a point to remember Anne's birthday despite being her second least favourite. She even remembered her ex's birthday, and made it a point to send him grotesque gifts with the help of Anne. "Well, at least you guessed yours right. Anything else?"

"Hmm… I love cooking, and I come from a fairly large family. Oh, and I do know how to knit. That's all, thank you for listening!" Anna and Katherine clapped at the introduction, while Anne grumbled about their dinner growing cold. She went ignored, and it was Katherine's turn to introduce herself. Not that she needed one since the rest knew her, but it was a formality at that point.

"Hi everyone! So first of all, thanks for coming for dinner at our place even though we burnt a few things! Anyways, I'm Katherine Howard! I'm a first-year majoring in Theatre, and I love pink! I'm Anne's beloved cousin, and… um… I _kinda_ forgot my birthday. It's around this time, that much I remember!"

"14 October, good thing we took a picture commemorating your party." Anne replied, scrolling through her phone's photo album, only stopping at a picture depicting her with the birthday girl and Anna with a pink cake. She smirked as she swiped left to the next picture, which depicted her smashing Katherine's face into the cake while Anna had a broad grin on her face. Needless to say, her cousin was royally pissed at her that day. "Are you done or do you have more to add?"

"Is having a tattoo interesting enough to be included in intros?" Everyone nodded, causing Katherine to smile at the responses. "I have a tattoo of a pink rose on my left hip, and the Libra constellation on my other hip! I'm thinking of getting another one, but I don't know what."

"You really like tattoos huh?" Anne asked between forkfuls of pasta, ignoring the glare from Catalina. She was hungry, what was she supposed to do, wait until they were done introducing themselves? Anna and Catherine followed suit, the latter had skipped lunch not knowing that there nearly wasn't any dinner had Jane not offered to cook. "Everyone knows who I am so yeah let's eat."

 _'I don't know you at all save for your reputation, but I'm too hungry to say it.'_ Catherine thought to herself as she shoved the pasta into her mouth, wolfing it down much to Catalina's disappointment. She expected little from Anne, but hoped that her roommate didn't display a lack of table manners. The English major ignored Catalina's disapproving looks, her sole focus was to satisfy her hunger. _'This is some fucking good shit.'_

"You could at least do so out of formality, Katherine did so even though we all know who she is." Catalina sighed, stabbing her fork into a slice of the bratwurst. She was relieved that she didn't have to get them takeouts, getting the cheesecake for Anne (and by extension the rest) was already a hassle. "Besides, you're only well-known for stealing my ex from me."

"I thought she's notorious for starting that fight with me." Jane mumbled, observing the expressions on the five women's faces. She was pleased to see that they all enjoyed her cooking, even though it was just pasta with ready-made cream sauce and bratwurst. "I'm rather curious about Anne's introduction, and frankly I wouldn't be surprised if it isn't suited for a general audience."

"Are you trying to pick a fight with me or something?" Anne asked, delicately raising an eyebrow as she twirled her fork in some spaghetti. Jane shook her head, that wasn't her intention even though she was aware that her phrasing implied it. "Anne Boleyn, third-year History major. My birthday's 2 July and I'm the sexiest student on campus."

"... _Right_ , moving on! Ich bin Anna von Cleves! The government fucked up my surname so it's spelt differently but that's not a problem for me. I'm in my second year, and I'm majoring in Astronomy… oh right! My birthday's 28 June, and I _love_ anything with stars on 'em!"

"Good thing glow-in-the-dark stickers are cheap and easily available." Anne commented, with Catherine nodding slowly as she stared at her plate, making a mental note to get something for Anna as a token of gratitude for not screwing up her orders at the cafe she frequented. Catalina had a tight smile on her lips as her hazel eyes flickered between Anna and Anne, the latter glaring back at her. "So _now_ can we eat our dinner in peace?"

"That's not the point of dinners Anne, it's a time where people gather and share how their days went. It's a time for connection, a time to foster closer relationships with each other." Jane stated, earning herself a nod of approval from Catalina. Catherine shrugged, she didn't mind either way. Anna glanced at her two roommates, both of them had unreadable expressions on their faces and she knew that it wasn't a pleasant topic for them. She gave Jane a pointed look, who immediately understood and smoothly changed the topic. "How's the dinner? I hope my cooking is up to standard."

"It's great! Can I trade you for my cousin? We need someone who won't burn something when cooking!" Katherine really meant it, she would happily exchange Anne if it meant having a roommate that could cook. Bonus points if the new roommate could clean, which was something Jane could do given the unnatural tidiness of her house. "I'll throw in Anna if my cousin's not enough!"

"You… really like my cooking?" Jane was speechless, no one had explicitly complimented her cooking skills that way Katherine did. She was delighted to hear that someone sincerely loved her cooking, not even her family expressed such feelings towards it. Said woman nodded, with Anne scoffing in the background before stuffing her mouth with Jane's pasta. "I… thank you. I'm not opposed to cooking for my friends."

"Am I the only one who's concerned that Kat sees us as a form of currency? No? It's just me?"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> 1\. Should Anne have yelled at Katherine and Anna after they burnt the pot? Why or why not?
> 
> 2\. Katherine tries to break the tension by getting the rest to introduce themselves. Is this a good way to cool tensions or is there a better way she could go about it?
> 
> 3\. Do you agree with Jane's opinion towards the purpose of dinners? Why or why not?


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> As mentioned in Chapter 1, Jane, Anne and Katherine are all related to each other in this story and there might be questions at the end of each questions for you to think/reflect on.

"Gotta say, that slut's cooking is pretty good. I'm still cheesed that my cousin plans to trade _me_ off and not Anna, no offence." Anna was lying down on the sofa while Katherine helped Jane to wash the dishes. Catalina and Anna had offered, but Jane insisted that there was no need for four people to wash the dishes. "Ms Arrogant, you staying the night?"

"I don't know, do you want me to?" Catalina asked, scrolling through her ex's Instagram account. She wasn't the type to stalk her exes, but she was bored and it wasn't as if she could simply drag Anne to her bedroom and have sex the whole night. Anne made a noise in response, to which Catalina took it as a yes. "Do you have an extra toothbrush then?"

"We have quite a few, there was a sale on toiletries last week."

"I love how you two act like a married couple." Anna teased, with both women growling in response. Catherine chuckled, she could definitely see them both in a relationship despite their open hatred for each other. "Once those two are done washing up, let's play a few games or something."

"Anna, when should we get rid of the pot in the tub?"

"Keine Ahnung."

"I took French in secondary school, not German."

"I said that I don't know, how 'bout we leave it in there and hope that Jane tosses it out for us?"

"She's not your maid." Catalina sighed, just how bad was it for them to push the problem to a third party? Catherine gulped, she couldn't very well admit that she had been indirectly using Jane as a maid whenever Catalina reminded her to clean up her room. Given that Jane hadn't said a thing about it to Catalina, Catherine assumed that it was safe to say that Jane didn't mind. "Where's the bathroom?"

"The door that's not marked." Catalina nodded, making her way to the bathroom. She entered the bathroom, not expecting to see a tub full of black liquid. She yelled for Anne, the latter grumbling as she entered the bathroom. She grimaced the moment her brown eyes laid sight on the tub, now resembling a failed eldritch ritual. "Well, fuck. The pot was still solid when I entered."

"Your pot _disintegrated_ in the water. I can't believe you guys, just how burnt was it before being dumped in there?"

"Go ask Kitty or Anna, they were the ones who dumped the pot in."

"... I can't believe I'm saying this, but we should let Jane deal with this. Chances are, her tribulations as a middle child in a family of ten kids would come in handy for her." Catalina couldn't believe she was giving up, but it was just too much for her to handle. Anne made a noise in agreement, having Jane around had its uses. "I didn't know one of you wore contacts."

"Huh?" Catalina gestured to a contacts case teetering on the edge of the sink, the latter sighing as she placed it on the rack beside it. "That belongs to Kitty, didn't you notice how her eyes are pink and not green?"

"She has green eyes? I didn't know that, I thought her eyes were naturally purple."

"I've yet to meet someone with natural purple eyes, let me know if you see such a mythical creature." They both chuckled at the exchange, leaving the bathroom and making their way back to the living room where the rest were waiting for them. Upon noticing the smirks on Catherine's and Anna's faces, they rushed to shove each other. "D-Don't get the wrong idea! We weren't in the bathroom together!"

"Uh huh, thanks for the heads up." None of their friends believed them, much to Anne's and Catalina's chagrin. They sat beside each other on the sofa, glaring at each other. "So I was thinking that we should play some games to pass time, not sure if you girls are staying over though."

"Well, Ms Arrogant already indicated that she's staying over. We don't mind if you two are also staying over." Jane glanced uneasily at Anne, was she actually okay with her staying over? She didn't mind staying over, she had packed a set of clothes in case she missed the bus back to her house. Her grey eyes met Katherine's pink ones, the latter flashing an indescribable smile at her.

"I… I _did_ bring a change of clothes in case I missed the last bus back home." Jane muttered, she was really bad at saying no. She had only said no once, and that resulted in applying for a restraining order against her ex-boyfriend. Fun times, she thought. "What about you Cathy? Will you be okay on your own?"

"Nope, I need someone to wake me up. I'm staying, I'll oversleep otherwise." Catherine remarked, she could _and_ would sleep the whole day if no one was there to wake her up. Both Catalina and Jane informed her that it was her body's way of saying that Catherine had an unhealthy sleep cycle, but the English major knew that she couldn't afford to change it. "Sleeping in this should be okay right?"

"Oh don't worry! Anne has worn the same outfit for three days straight, you're good!" Catalina wrinkled her nose, scooting away from Anne as subtly as possible. Jane and Catherine followed suit, putting some distance between themselves and Anne. The History major was now glaring at her cousin, who innocently blinked back at her. "What?"

"... Forget it. So, games. What do you guys wanna play? I vote spinning the bottle."

"Absolutely not, there are kids here." Jane immediately shut down the idea, with Katherine frowning in response to being called a child. She was of legal age to drink, and had done so on her birthday. Jane noticed, and explained her comment. "Not you Katherine, me. I'm a kid."

"What she means is that she wants to save her lips for someone she actually likes, and she can't hold her alcohol." Catalina laughed, recalling the day after their final exams during their first year and Jane ended up getting so drunk that she had to sleep over at Catalina's place. She decided to tell everyone about that particular memory, leaving Anne howling with amusement and Catherine smirking at said senior. Anna made a comment about how the British couldn't hold their liquor, while Katherine nodded along. "Let's not forget you kissed that statue in the courtyard that night!"

"This is going to haunt me, isn't it?" Jane covered her face with her hands out of shame, groaning loudly in them. The rest laughed, save for Katherine who was kind enough to nod sympathetically at the memory. "Katherine, how did you meet Anna? Both of you are in different years after all."

"Pffffft! I can show you if you girls wanna see!" Now it was Katherine's turn to groan into her hands, while Anna patted her shoulder reassuringly. Anne held out her phone and scrolled through her photo album until she reached a video, grinning as she turned the volume all the way up before starting. "So this was last year when Kitty's spending her summer working at Haus of Holbein."

"You mean the costume store selling Tudor and Elizabethan costumes? I didn't think you were the type to like long dresses Anna." Catherine commented, paling as she realised that she was categorising Anna to a stereotype based on her appearance. "Wait, no. I didn't mean-"

"Nah, you're right. I wasn't there for dresses that I can't move in, I was there for some lipstick because why the hell not." Anna chuckled, nudging Katherine as Anne started the video. Katherine let out a loud groan as the store's signature music played, she didn't want to relieve her ten minutes of shame even though it was for a good cause.

 _"Willkommen to der Haus of Holbein! May I interest you in some corsets?"_ A younger Katherine asked a bewildered Anna, who clearly had no intention to buy corsets at the store. Katherine wished that her cousin would delete the video, but it was already on social media for a year now. _"You have a wonderful figure!"_

 _"Is it really necessary for you to speak with a German accent?"_ The Anna in the video asked, with Katherine nodding her head stiffly, glancing over her shoulder and at someone not on screen. _"Ooookay, I'm not here for corsets. I'm just here for some lipstick so if you could direct me to that section-"_

_"Miss, I'm begging you. I need to get customers to spend 100 pounds if I want to keep my job, and I need this job for the whole summer else my parents aren't paying for university. Please just listen to me talk about the stuff we sell here and buy something worth at least 50 pounds, I'm desperate as fuck."_

_"Riiiiiight, is it even legal for employers to fire part-timers not hitting their quotas?"_ The figures started to move, and the camera followed them. _"So uh… corsets? Any nice ones?"_

_"Ooh, ja! We have corsets that'll give you a nine-inch waist!"_

_"... Y-You mean that the corset is a size 9 right?"_

" _Nein! Nine inches!"_

 _"Uh look, the smallest waist in the world record is at 17. Not only will women be easily setting new records, they'll die from it?"_ The Anna in the video grabbed a corset hanging off a rack, throwing to the floor seconds later. Video Katherine rushed to pick it up, dusting it off before returning to its rightful place on the rack. _"Please tell me those are for kids and the adult corsets are somewhere else."_

_"Nein! The corsets for die Kinder are at zero inches!"_

_"I… I legit have no idea if you're genuinely clueless or you're forced to act like this."_ They moved away from the racks and towards a section that had 'MAKEUP' in neon lighting. The camera followed, with snickering heard from no particular direction. _"Make-up! Finally! Lipstick, here I come!"_

 _"Miss, a bright shade of red will really bring out your eyes. I recommend this one und this shiny red eyeliner here!"_ Video Katherine held up said products, a bright smile on her face as she handed the products for Anna to try. Before she could, Katherine continued with warnings that would chill the customer to her bones. _"So what if they contain lead, at least your complexion will bring all the boys in!"_

_"Lead?! And you're okay with selling me products that should be illegal?!"_

_"I mean… Haus of Holbein is based on the Tudor period… what did you expect from this place?"_ Anne was chuckling at Video Katherine's comment, that particular line always cracked her up every time she watched it. Catherine and Jane frowned, they couldn't believe that make-up with poisonous materials were still available in the 21st Century. _"But no, I'm not okay with selling stuff that killed Queen Elizabeth I."_

 _"Oh thank god, okay what's next?"_ Video Anna was observed to breathe a sigh of relief as Video Katherine led her to the next section, with numerous coloured bras on display. There were lacy ones, and ones that were more lace than paddings. _"Uh…"_

 _"In Haus of Holbein, we have inventions that can hold everything up!"_ Video Katherine grabbed a bra off the rack and presented it to Video Anna, who scrutinised the bra sceptically. _"Ja, it's wunderbar!"_

_"This just says 'Wonderbra'. What happened to the historical influences of whatever bra-like inventions they had then?"_

_"I literally have no idea Miss, this is my first day here."_

_"And you're already threatened with unemployment?! I should blacklist Haus of Holbein after this…"_ The camera followed them to another section, this time the sign above the section indicated 'HAIRDYE' in neon lights. _"Oh nice, hair dye! Higher education's a good time to dye my hair, do you have any in red?"_

 _"Nein! But we do have blonde dye!"_ Video Anna was given a container filled with blonde hair dye, and upon opening it to examine the colour, she sealed it and started retching. Video Katherine had a tight-lipped frown as she tossed the container back to where it belonged, the rubbish bin. _"Whoops, that must be the container that one of my colleagues urinated in."_

_"An employee peed in there?! The fuck's wrong with this place?!"_

_"This isn't even my last choice for employment, the pay's horrible too."_ They moved away from the hair dye section, where the coloured lights in the background suddenly grew in intensity. Exactly seven seconds had passed in the video, and the store was no different from a dance club. _"This is the most popular section for our customers! No one can resist shoes!"_

_"I can, and how many customers does this place have?"_

_"I'm contractually not allowed to answer that, but I can say that it's definitely more than what you're thinking!"_

_"So more than zero then, great."_ Video Anna was gestured to sit on a cushioned stool, with Video Katherine running off-screen and back in it with a pair of high heels that were at least 20 centimetres tall. _"Oh uh, do I have to wear 'em?"_

 _"You should try them on! It's so high, it's like mega naughty if you wear this during Tudor times!"_ Video Katherine pushed the pair of heels to Video Anna, who was reluctant to wear them. _"I can't guarantee that you can still walk at 40 though."_

_"Forget 40! I won't be able to walk at 20 if I put this damned pair on!"_

_"How old are you?"_

_"I turn 19 this year!"_

_"Yeah, ignore your fear and you'll go from a vier to a nine!"_

_"That sounds so cult-like and I'm legit scared as hell now. Are you guys secretly a cult?"_

_"... I don't think so?"_ Loud cheering and off-key singing could be heard in the video, and the camera immediately switched its direction to the source of the noise, which was a group of employees dancing stupidly at the make-up section. _"Wait, why are they dancing? This isn't part of our project."_

 _"Das ist gut, ooh ja!"_ The employees chanted, with air horns blaring while the music drowned out Video Anna's exclamations. _"Ja! Ooh, ja! Der Haus of Holbein!"_

 _"Kitty, I think your parents put drugs in sugar containers."_ Anne's voice was barely audible in the video, and anyone watching it had to strain their ears to pick up on it. A muffled gasp was heard, and the camera was back to facing the two main stars of the video. _"I really thought it was sugar, that part wasn't planned."_

_"They better not be drug addicts, I need them to pay for my tuition next year!"_

_"Who the fuck are you and why are you filming us?!"_ The video ended, having been stopped by Anna that day, who was unaware that the cousins planned to use Anne's social media presence to inform people that Haus of Holbein was running a questionable and probably illegal operation.

"And _that_ was how we met! Anna was nice enough to call the police afterwards!" Katherine summarised, beaming as she hugged Anna, who ruffled her hair playfully. The three guests stared at Anne's phone in shock, that was not how they expected the three roommates to meet. "Anne made them cookies so that she was allowed to stay! Obviously it backfired."

"What was in those cookies anyways?" Catherine was the only one brave enough to ask, Jane and Catalina were still trying to process the disaster that went viral online which led to an investigation by the legal authorities. "I get that they were drugs… but what kind?"

"We have no idea! Whatever it was, it was addictive and illegal!" Katherine cheerfully replied, sparking concern in Jane. Despite the upbeat responses from the cousins, she got the feeling that their family lives were much darker than what they let on. She realised that was the reason Anna gave her a pointed look during dinner, the latter must have known about their family situation. "Jane, how did you meet Lin-Lin?"

"... Lin-Lin?" Catalina let out a loud sigh, Katherine had called her by that nickname when they first met and it stuck, much to her displeasure. Catherine did her best to not laugh, that was the funniest nickname she had ever heard and the only reason why she wasn't roaring with laughter was because she didn't wish to be murdered by her roommate in her sleep. "Oh, I first met Lina in our first year. I worked at a pharmacy store back then and she occasionally visited the store to purchase… a certain kind of medicine. We became friends after the courtyard incident, and _then_ Lina dropped me a bombshell during our second year."

"Bombshell? It's Ms Arrogant you're talking about here, what kind of bombshell can she even have?"

"Bo-loser, you remember that night Henry convinced us to do a threesome?" Anne nodded briskly, memories of that night still fresh on her mind. "Yeah, that's the bombshell."

"Oh god, that night was disappointing and I realised that I'm at least sexually into ladies." Anne scoffed, her ex had no idea how to use his equipment and it ended up being a painful experience for both women involved. Not to mention that said equipment was smaller than he boasted, hence they had to fake being pleasured that night. "So what, you horrified her while out buying condoms for that sorry prick?"

"Ha! She thought I was getting them for you!"

"Me?! I don't have a dick!"

"Lina made it sound like she was having sex with a man with your surname, and I only found out who the condoms were _really_ for when I started dating Henry…" Jane sighed, at least Catalina spared everyone the details of her insisting the purchase to include pregnancy tests. "Can we move on from this?"

"No way, I want to hear more about Seymour making a fool of herself."

"Ooh that reminds me of the one time she threw her cup of coffee at me during my shift! I was like 'damn good thing it wasn't hot' back then!" Anna winked at Jane, who was mortified at the recount. Catherine gaped at Jane, she couldn't believe that the nicest person on campus would throw a good cup of coffee at Anna.

"That was you?! I'm so sorry, the coffee just tasted terrible compared to other cafes!"

"Huge mood really, only _one_ person in the room actually likes the coffee there." Everyone stared at Catherine, who threw up her hands in surrender. "At least I got to meet Cathy- can I call you that or…?"

"Cathy's fine, and yes. I'm glad that I can no longer tell what's coffee and what's shit water anymore." Catherine smiled, something that Anna easily mirrored. Jane and Catalina did their best to not roll their eyes, somewhat amused at how Catherine played down her love for coffee."It's funny how my ex has the same name as Aragón's ex. Are there really that many Henrys here?"

"Is he fat, tall, smells like River Thames back in the 1800s and sports a gross beard?" Katherine asked, crossing her arms protectively as Catherine nodded in reply. The others sighed, expressing explicit disgust at the confirmation. "Welcome to the club then."

"You're kidding, _all_ of you have dated him?"

"Well, I stole him from _her_." Anne jerked a thumb at Catalina, who rolled her eyes. Anne proceeded to jerk her other thumb at Jane, who averted her eyes away from the History major. "Then _she_ stole him from me."

"In my defence, he told me that he was single! Not to mention that he seemed like a nice guy back then… Anyways I only dated him for two months?"

"Yikes, I dated him for like two minutes." Anna cringed, how did her friends even manage to put up with Henry for so long? She ended the date the moment he insulted her looks as well as her skin colour, and never regretted it. Ironically she still talked to him from time to time, the reason why was beyond her. "Okay but I found that arsehole on Tinder so that would explain why he's so shitty."

"You never did say why you were on Tinder then."

"Kat, sometimes I need to fuck around. I get horny sometimes and I'm not the type to fuck my roommates."

"You should try blind dating, I met a lot of blokes who wanted to mess around and they don't smell." Catherine suggested, soon on the receiving end of Jane's glaring. Catherine _could_ rebuke and mention that was how she met Jane's brother, but decided against it. She still needed her senior's services in cleaning up her room. "What about you Howard?"

"I… don't really wanna talk about it. Not now at least." Katherine mumbled, crossing her arms tighter. Catherine nodded, she could tell that it wasn't a topic the first-year wanted to discuss and swiftly changed topics. "Sorry."

"It's alright, love. Though I'm curious, did you buy your hair dye from Haus of Holbein?"

"Ew, no! The stuff in there is cancerous!"

"That didn't stop you from handing me that make-up. Still can't get over how they _actually_ have lead in 'em." Anna shuddered, to think that she was about to slather poisonous metals on her face last year. Good thing Katherine warned her, though she would appreciate it if she was warned _before_ receiving the make-up. "How did you two end up rooming together?"

"Haha! Okay, so I had enough of my assigned roommate in my first year and I saw a listing that the flat I'm currently rooming with Aragón had a place free. She was standing outside the unit where we're living and was arguing with some Francophobic bloke, and I intervened by spouting some random words in French!"

"Random?! All you said was 'oui oui, bonjour, French baguette'!" Catalina countered, but was bursting into laughter nonetheless. Catherine was also laughing and it took her a solid minute for her to compose herself to continue the story. Anne shook her head at the opening, while the other three women chuckled at Catherine's attempt to speak French back then.

" _You_ said it too! After a while of rudimentary French, that bloke screamed bloody murder and went back to his unit! So I went to find the landlady to get the key and she told me that due to reasons she didn't want to disclose, I'll have to share it with someone."

"And that someone's me since I applied too. We were both cool with it, since we out-Frenched that arse out of my face."

"Love how spinning the bottle ended up as a get to know session, can I _please_ crack open the alcohol now?" Anne asked, desperate to taste the vodka she bought with the pasta and the pot. Catalina groaned, of course she had to ruin the mood with alcohol. The rest all gave her pointed looks, even her cousin. Anne relented, she just wasn't used to swapping stories like what women usually did over sleepovers and made no pains to hide it. "We can get back to gossiping once we get the night going?"

"Fine, but please don't serve Jane any alcohol. We don't need her kissing any statues tonight."

"T-Trust me more Lina!"

* * *

"Katherine, I wanted to thank you for inviting me to dinner. It's nice to meet your friends… and your cousin." Jane whispered to Katherine, who was recording her cousin stripping while the rest cheered her on. They were the only ones still sober, as both didn't touch a drop of alcohol. Anna was somewhat sober, but unfortunately not sober enough to recognise that Anne was stripping in front of people she barely knew. Katherine hummed in agreement, turning her head away from the sight and unexpectedly came face to face with Jane. "To be honest, I'm afraid of contacts. The thought of putting anything onto my eyes scares me, I guess you can say that I admire you for putting coloured contacts onto your eyes."

"You've noticed?"

"It suits you." Jane meant it, pink was really Katherine's colour. The latter blushed faintly, people either told her that it was weird or didn't notice it to begin with. They winced as Anne started to belt out 'Don't Lose Ur Head', and despite what the History major thought, she was a terrible singer. The others were too drunk to be bothered by the off-pitch singing, clapping along as she danced. "I've always thought that Queen Boleyn was an elegant woman who triumphed in politics."

"At least she's not singing 'All U Wanna Do', you don't wanna hear that." Katherine replied, cringing at her cousin's cover of said song. Not only was it highly off-key, it was accompanied by extremely inappropriate dance moves that involved more stripteasing. Jane took her word for it, she didn't wish to visualise that particular performance anyways. "Do you wanna take a bath first? I can handle them."

"That's very kind of you, I'll do my best to bathe as quickly as possible." Katherine proceeded to inform her which door led to the bathroom, with Jane thanking her once more. She made her way towards said room, grateful for the respite from her friends. She loved Catalina and Catherine, but disliked it whenever they got too drunk for her liking. Upon entering the bathroom, she was horrified to witness the state of the bathtub, and had to use a nearby towel to muffle her swearing lest Katherine heard it. _'What happened here?! It looks terrible!'_

"Jane? Is everything alright? I heard something…" Katherine poked her head into the bathroom, quickly realising what was wrong. She was shocked to see that the burnt pot had disintegrated in the water, turning it black. Small lumps of black solids floated at the surface, Katherine didn't want to know whether that belonged to the pot or it was something else altogether. "... That explains why Anne was screaming at us hours ago…"

"This is fine, I got this. My siblings were way worse. All I have to do is to unplug this and let the water drain out…" Jane mumbled to herself as she strode towards the bathtub, yanking out the plug and allowing water to be drained off. A small whirlpool formed at the drainage hole, the black water swirling in and leaving the black solids behind. Katherine gazed with admiration, she would've just let the problem fester until it was impossible to ignore. "Katherine, do you have any rubbish bags lying around? A pair of tongs would be much appreciated too."

"I'll take a gander in our kitchen, can't guarantee the tongs though." Katherine made her way to the kitchen and opened the cabinet where they kept their rubbish bags in case they wanted to dispose of bodies or something similar. She then grabbed a pair of rubber gloves lying beside the bags, and made her way back to the bathroom. She handed the items to Jane, who gritted her teeth as she wore the gloves. The fourth-year was fishing about for the black solids, they were more slippery than anticipated. "Will you be okay on your own?"

"Yeah, thanks for the gloves." Katherine went back to the living room where the rest were, with hopes that someone was sober enough to help stop the rest from drinking. Anna and Catherine were hanging back, though they weren't sober enough to be effective in stopping Anne and Catalina.

"C'mon, stop drinking already. Urgh, this is worse than the time you two got plastered enough to do hanky-panky stuff in front of me." Katherine groaned, doing her best to separate Catalina from her cousin, who was now grinding against the first-year. "Gross! What did we say about grinding under this roof?!"

"We… we only grind against sexy people?"

"No! We only grind salt and pepper in this household! Urgh, I'm literally the baby here so why am I taking care of a bunch of drunk adults?!" Anna groaned, her head was hurting and her visions spun slightly. "Anna? Are you okay?"

"Just peachy Kat. Takes a lot more to get a German sloshed like those two." Anna replied, wincing as a stabbing pain shot through her head. "Fuck, we out of painkillers yet?"

"Not sure, help me toss Lin-Lin into the bathtub." Katherine was barely able to support Anne's weight, let alone Catalina's. Anna complied, easily supporting her senior's weight and leading her towards the bathroom. Catherine groaned loudly, she felt like her head was splitting and was washed with a wave of nausea. "Cathy, are you okay? If you wanna hurl, I can drop Anne and bring you the rubbish bin."

"I'm… I'm good." Catherine placed a hand to her forehead, just how much did she drink? She only remembered having five shots, and the rest of the night was a blur. "... Did I do something stupid?"

"Not that I know of." Katherine grunted, Anne's weight was proving too much to bear and as such, she decided to let her cousin fall onto the floor with a sickening thud. She went to check in on Jane, who was sitting on the toilet and wiping beads of sweat away from her forehead with a towel. Catalina was inside the bathtub, while Anna sprayed her with water from the shower head. "Jane! You did it!"

"Told you I got it." Jane's chest heaved steadily, she had wanted to give up halfway but she couldn't. Not when she was an indirect cause, she had learnt from Catherine that Katherine wanted to have dinner with her but felt awkward if it was just them. Of course, she only pieced that information together when she arrived at the unit that night. "Lina, are you sober yet?"

"Mmpgh…"

"I'll take that as a no.

* * *

Katherine groaned as she shifted her position, only waking up when she realised that there was something in between her legs and a weight on her private regions. She assumed that it was Jane, since she shared a room with her and attributed it to poor sleeping positions. She looked down, and screamed upon realising it was her cousin whom she left outside to sleep off the alcohol.

"Anne?! The fuck are you doing in here?!" Jane was jolted awake, shocked to see Anne present in Katherine's bedroom. Katherine had ensured that the door was locked three times before they slept, and while Jane respected it, she was puzzled as to why Katherine was so insistent on keeping the door locked. She wasn't intending to press the issue, and was much more concerned with Anne's unexpected presence. "I left you outside!"

"Nnngh… Oh, hey Kitty." Anne sleepily replied, her head still rested on her cousin's pelvis. She only woke up after getting herself kicked in the shoulder, courtesy of Jane. "Fuck! You wanna go slut?!"

"Before you duke it out with Jane, explain to me how you entered my bedroom when I locked it!"

"How should I know?! You know I can do all sorts of mind-fuckery when I'm asleep!"

"You should see a doctor for your sleepwalking condition, it might be a brain tumour."

"What the fuck's wrong with you?!" Anne and Jane started arguing, giving Katherine a throbbing headache. She liked them both, but wished that they would at least pretend to get along in front of her. Then again, she valued honesty over other values. She reached out for her phone, gasping as she saw the time. "What's wrong Kitty?"

"I'm late!" Anne yelped as Katherine mustered the strength to push her cousin off her, with Jane becoming a casualty in the process. Jane grunted as she became Anne's cushion, both sprawled on the floor while Katherine leapt off the bed in order to get ready for the day. "Anne, don't murder Jane! Jane, help yourself to whatever's available in the kitchen!"

"... Can I ask why she's in such a rush?" Jane asked Anne, who elbowed her in response. She got off her senior shortly after, leaving Jane on the floor, groaning in pain. "... I'll take that as a no."

"If you really wanna know, go ask Kitty yourself." Anne doubted that Katherine would spill everything to a woman she barely knew for a week, all they really had in common was Henry, other than that there was nothing tying them together. Jane weakly moaned as she propped herself up, she felt like Anne had broken one of her ribs after getting elbowed. "I would ask you to scram, but Kitty probs wants you fed so get your arse up and have breakfast with us."

"What time is it?"

"Probs a few minutes to noon, why?" Anne offered a hand to Jane, who accepted it and pulled her up. The latter was still in pain, but was able to breathe normally without hurting much. They left Katherine's bedroom and entered the bathroom to freshen up, both stifling giggles as they saw Catalina passed out in the bathtub, her clothes soaked through and doodles from markers on her face. "Oh man, how shitfaced did we get?"

"Her face was still clean when I left Anna to sober her up, so I guess you did it."

"Pffft, that _does_ sound like a me thing not gonna lie." Catalina grumbled in the background, and was splashing about in the tub. "Well, well, well. Finally awake huh?"

"Shut the fuck up Bo-loser. I'm hungover as hell and why am I so cold?" Catalina asked, blearily opening her eyes to see the two women grinning away like fools. She looked down, and realised the state of her clothes did nothing to keep her warm. "... Honestly, I was expecting Bo-loser to be in the tub."

"Woke up on Kitty's crotch, went as well as you can expect."

"Sorry, coming through." Catherine dashed into the bathroom and towards the toilet bowl, proceeding to throw up into it. Anna was at the door, watching Catherine throw up with a plate of toast in her hands. She munched on the toast, earning herself looks of surprise from Anne and Catalina.

"What?"

"Did you toast those yourself or…?"

"Hell no! I can't cook for shit remember?" Anna continued to munch on her toast, gesturing to Catherine, who was still throwing up. The rest nodded, save for Jane, who proceeded to cast a glare at said woman. She was under the impression that Catherine couldn't cook, hence why she prepared lunches for the English major daily without fail. "Oh yeah, there are doughnuts available. Hard as fuck compared to the käsekuchen though, and don't ask me where the fuck did it come from."

"Catherine Parr! You told me that you couldn't cook even if your life depended on it!" Catherine's chest heaved for a final time, her body slumped over the toilet bowl as she blankly stared at her friend with glassy blue eyes.

"It was just toast… anyone could operate a toaster…"

"I present to you Bo-loser, who burnt down my previous flat just by boiling water."

"Cathy, you're going to make your own lunches from now on."

"Don't do this to me Seymour, Aragón's meals are too spicy for my liking."

"Bitch, be grateful that you still have someone willing to make you lunch."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> 1\. With reference to the Haus of Holbein video, how does this exaggeration link to the reality of labour exploitation?
> 
> 2\. Is it fair for Anna to generalise that everyone found on Tinder are bad? Can it be linked to how people have differing perspectives towards different social media platforms?


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> As mentioned in Chapter 1, Jane, Anne and Katherine are all related to each other in this story and there might be questions at the end of each questions for you to think/reflect on. Basically similar to Literature books.

"Cathy? What are you doing in this section?" Anna asked, surprised to see Catherine lingering around the astronomy section of the library. It was a few days after their dinner together, which ended up with Jane swearing off making lunches for Catherine, who was apparently better at cooking than what Jane thought.

"I'm looking for a few books about constellations for this project I'm doing. Would look it up online, but my eyes hurt after staring at the damn screen." Catherine explained, her finger tracing the edges of the books as she searched for a suitable one. Anna nodded, grabbing the books that she needed before following the English major in her search for the books she wanted. "Do you think stars are romantic?"

"Sure do, that's how my parents met."

"They both majored in Astronomy?"

"Nope, they met at a planetarium. My mother broke up with her ex there, and my father witnessed the whole ordeal. He then went up to her and offered to be her date for this couple event, and the rest was history."

"That's pretty cool, sounds like something straight out from a romance novel." Catherine commented, tip-toeing as she strained to reach a book on the highest shelf. Anna stepped in and easily removed the book from the shelf, handing it to the English major with a grin. "Thanks Anna, I would've caused a domino effect without you."

"No problem." For once, Anna was grateful for her height. She didn't like towering over almost everyone, that was the main reason why some men didn't want to date her in the past. Catherine returned the grin with one of her own, going down the shelves in search for a few more books. "How did you meet Jane?"

"You remember how I said that I broke up with her brother?" Anna nodded, which Catherine took as an indication to continue her explanation. "I met him on a blind date that one of my acquaintances set me up with, we initially chatted over text so I didn't know what he looked like."

"Did he have a gender-neutral name?"

"Nope, at that time I only knew him as 'T.S.' but I don't really care about gender when it comes to dating. Anyways, we decided to meet and he came with Seymour. I have no fucking clue why he thought it was a good idea to bring his sister but I thought that she was the one texting me since the style was how I imagined hers to be like."

"Soooo… formal, considerate, would probably blush when praised?"

"Exactly, and I've heard of Seymour. Hell, almost everyone on campus has at least heard of her regardless of the reason. I asked her if she was my date, the horror on her face was so bad that I can't describe it even with words. And I'll have you know that I'm damn good with words." Catherine chuckled, not wanting to alert the librarian. They were still in the library and the last thing she needed was to get kicked out from her safe haven. "So yeah, that was how we met. We did exchange numbers, mostly because she couldn't trust her brother to stay away from danger. That, and he was a lot older than us."

"Yeesh, that honestly sounds like a red flag."

"Right? I regretted not jumping ship after that date, but he proved to be useful material for my projects. It was about taking a few years off from school."

"Do you date people only for research?"

"Nope, just the last two. My first love happened when I was in Primary 3, his name's Edward Burgh. Sweet boy, though a bit gullible. He moved away in winter that year, and we lost touch." Catherine replied, removing two books from the shelf and opening up one of them, flipping through the pages briefly before she closed it with a satisfied smile on her face. "My second love was John Neville, we met in Secondary 3. He died shortly after."

"Wait, 'died'?" Anna asked, realisation dawning on her as she placed a hand over her heart. Catherine nodded absent-mindedly, snapping to attention after a few tense seconds from Anna. "I'm sorry for your loss."

"What? Oh god, that was misleading. John was her dead name, her name's Johanna by the way. We dated for a while, before she realised that she identified as female and was confused about her sexual orientation. She didn't know whether she liked me romantically, and eventually discovered that she saw me only as a good friend. She moved to the States after graduation, we still keep in touch though."

"Oh, thank god. I wouldn't know what to do if you're still grieving over someone. Papa says that we should be strong even when the people closest to us leave, but I don't think that's very empathetic."

"There are many perspectives when it comes to grief, there's no right one really. Sadly, most people are in too much pain to realise that there's more than one way to grieve, and that what matters most is to remember the person lost rather than the process to do so." Catherine commented, removing a book from the shelf. She grunted at the weight of the four books, she knew that she should've made two trips but she didn't want to impose on Anna. "Today's a good haul."

"Are you gonna write a date under the stars or something?"

"Perhaps, maybe I'll show it to you when a draft's ready." Catherine winked, making Anna's heart skip a beat. Anna brushed that feeling aside, her new friend was too charming for her heart to handle. "What are you in here for?"

"Oh, just for leisure. Not sure what to read, any recommendations?"

"Time to join me in Austen hell then."

"Wait what?"

* * *

"Bo-loser, done with classes?" Anne was on her way out when she bumped to Catalina, who was on her way into the lecture hall. Truthfully, Anne wasn't done with that day's lessons but she planned on skipping her remaining lessons for the day. She shrugged in response, which told Catalina all she needed to know. "Don't skip classes."

"I have better things to do than to attend some boring lecture."

"Oh really, like what?"

"My assignments for one." That was a lie, Anne had no intentions using the next few hours doing her assignments. Catalina saw through her lie, and crossed her arms. Anne rolled her eyes, what was the big deal about skipping a few lectures anyways? "Fine, I wanna dance and sing somewhere. Happy?"

"Not really, you're a terrible singer by the way."

"Go fuck yourself."

"Why don't you fuck me instead?" Catalina retorted, taking a step closer to Anne. They glared at each other, neither of them saying a word for a few minutes. Eventually, Anne was the one to cut the silence.

"Not tonight, it's film night with Kitty and Anna."

"A shame, I _really_ need to de-stress some time soon." Catalina shrugged, sending Anne off before entering the lecture hall. Anne glanced back at the entrance, letting out a heavy sigh as she decided against skipping class. She didn't want to admit it, but she was whipped when it came to her enemy. Anne left the building and visited the cafe Anna worked at, hoping to kill some time with her roommate before her next class. Anna was on shift, but was too occupied with Catherine to notice.

"So I'll meet you at seven?" Catherine asked, leaning against the counter. Anna nodded, a starry-eyed expression on her face as she blissfully ignored Anne. Anne rolled her eyes as she took a seat near to the counter, using this opportunity to eavesdrop on their conversation. "Great, I'm looking forward to it."

"Isn't it a bit too soon for you two to go on a date?" Anna and Catherine were startled by Anne's teasing, they didn't notice that the cafe wasn't just them. Anne smirked, akin to how a cat caught a mouse for dinner. "Oh, don't mind me. Continue staring into each other's eyes, I won't interrupt."

"Boleyn, you do realise that you ruined whatever mood we had going?"

"Oh, totally. Be glad that I'm not cockblocking you two on the date itself." Anna paused, realising that her retort fell flat given that none of them had the mentioned male appendage. "Sorry, I meant clitblocking. Unless one of you has it and-"

"It's just an extra ticket to the planetarium. Anyways, I'll be missing film night so don't choose something Kat's not supposed to be watching." Anna waved Anne off, with the latter flipping her roommate off playfully. Catherine was intrigued at the way they depicted their friendship, it was straight out of movies that depicted friends covering up each other's crimes and having their backs. She doubted that Catalina would help her bury a body (unless it was Anne's), and she was sure that Jane would immediately report her to the authorities.

"Film night?" Catherine asked, considering bringing this idea up to Catalina. It would be nice to relax over a film and hot coffee, she thought. Anne and Anna nodded, the former shrugging in response.

"Today's my turn to choose the film, normally Anna stops me from choosing porn because y'know, poor impulse control here."

"Hell no, go watch a Disney film or something!"

"Kitty chose that last week!"

"What about an Austen film? There's quite a few on Netflix." Catherine suggested, and was met with blank looks from the two women. They broke out in laughter seconds later, much to Catherine's confusion. "What? Some of her novels are adapted into films!"

"Bold of you to assume that we have Netflix."

"... Fair point."

* * *

Jane sighed, classes had ended for the day and she wasn't sure how she should spend the day. She knew that she should spend her remaining time on her assignments, especially her final year thesis. However, she desperately needed a break for her studies even though she couldn't really afford to do so. She decided to not think about her studies and wander around campus, which was technically a break in her opinion. She ended up wandering to the building where most of the theatre classes were conducted, and noticed a certain man loitering outside a room.

"What are you doing here?" Thomas flinched, scowling as Jane glared at him. She wasn't sure if she should intervene in Katherine's relationships with others, she didn't want the first year to think that she was being too intrusive especially since they only knew each other for barely more than a week. Not to mention that Katherine was clearly stronger than she appeared, just that it wasn't directly visible.

"None of your fucking business. Stop being such a goody two shoes Jane." Jane's eyebrow twitched, she didn't like the way he said her name. It was the downside of being well-known in school, almost everyone knew who she was. She had the feeling that she had seen the man before, she just couldn't put her finger on it. "Why the hell are you here? You study on the other side of campus."

"As what you've just said, it's not one you should concern yourself with." They both glared at each other, only breaking away when Katherine exited the room. The first-year was horrified to see him loitering outside her classroom, and immediately went to hide behind Jane, who resumed glaring at the man. "I think your presence is unwanted here."

"... You'll regret this Katherine." He growled, stalking off after realising that people were starting to stare at him. Jane glowered at his retreating figure, and even after he was long gone. She could feel Katherine trembling against her back, Jane was relieved that she did the right thing by intervening in her friend's life.

"Are you alright Katherine?" Jane didn't want to startle the first-year by turning around abruptly, she sensed that what Katherine needed was something to cling onto until she was ready. She heard a muffled whimper, and took that as an indication that Katherine wasn't alright in the slightest. "Can I get you anything, like a pastry or some water…?"

"... Stay with me, just until my next class."

"Alright, I'll stay with you." Jane agreed, wondering if there was more to their first meeting when she stepped in and took the slap from Thomas. She only witnessed him yelling at a defenceless Katherine back then, and didn't hesitate intervening then. She didn't regret it, she liked being friends with Katherine even though she was Anne's cousin. As much as she wanted to know about her relationship with Thomas, Jane understood that she had no right to ask about what clearly was a sensitive topic for the Theatre major. _'This is all I can do for her, though… where have I seen that man before?'_

"Do you need anything in return?" Jane was startled, where did _that_ come from? Of course she wasn't expecting anything in return, why would she? She simply wanted to be there for a friend, whether they knew each other for years or minutes was irrelevant. To hear that Katherine was expecting her to want something in return stung a bit. "Just say it and I'll do my best."

"Katherine, I don't want anything in return. I'm just doing this because I want to, there's no hidden meaning behind it."

"It sounds almost too good to be true, but I'll take your word for it." No longer was Katherine being her (somewhat) cheerful self, though Jane assumed it was mainly due to Thomas's unexpected presence. The more she thought about it, the more she realised that Katherine was much more complex than she initially assumed. Catalina had once told her of smiling depression, basically another name for persistent depressive disorder. Jane briefly wondered if Katherine fit under the description, but immediately dismissed the thought. She had no right to diagnose her friend, regardless of her qualifications. "... Thank you."

"It really isn't something that needs gratitude, I'm just doing what anyone would do." Katherine stiffened, worrying Jane. She was afraid that she had unintentionally struck a nerve, the last thing she wanted was to give Anne another reason to come for her head. The first-year eventually relaxed, relieving Jane. "Do you know what Cathy says whenever she brings someone to her library? She says that it's her parr-sonal library."

"... Heh. That was lame."

"It made you laugh a little though."

"... I suppose." Jane could feel her back becoming lighter, an indication that Katherine was no longer leaning against her for comfort. She took this as a sign to turn around, and saw Katherine in a dishevelled state. Her make-up was running, and her hands were trembling. Katherine easily towered over her, yet Jane felt that she was looking down at a scared child. She didn't know what to do, her major never taught her what she should do when a child was scared, let alone an adult. "My next class is starting soon. I should… I should go. See you around Jane."

"Good luck with classes." Katherine bobbed her head, keeping it down as she left the area. Jane couldn't help but worry for her, despite her belief that the first year was much stronger than what people saw. She reached out for her phone, her finger hovering above the touchscreen as she considered her options. _'... Forget it, someone like me has no right...'_

* * *

**[that boleyn girl]**

_**[2.57 PM]** _

**katsitter:** hey cuz

 **katsitter:** wht do u think abt jane?

 **that boleyn girl:** u want my opinion?

 **that boleyn girl:** wait did she do smth bad to u???

 **that boleyn girl:** SHES DEAD

 **katsitter:** no she didnt

 **katsitter:** she didnt want anything frm me

 **that boleyn girl:** kitty…

 **that boleyn girl:** look shes a slut tht looks down on ppl with loose morals like me

 **that boleyn girl:** n shes religious af

 **that boleyn girl:** but shes loyal af too

 **that boleyn girl:** her hearts in the correct place

 **that boleyn girl:** her methods probs not

 **that boleyn girl:** wait wtf happened then

 **katsitter:** thomas was looking for me

 **katsitter:** n she chased him away

 **katsitter:** i dun get why tho…

 **katsitter:** nth gd will come frm being with me

 **that boleyn girl:** rmb wht the bitch said to u?

 **katsitter:** which one? u call many ppl bitches

 **that boleyn girl:** ur mental bitch

 **that boleyn girl:** she told u to stop thinking tht u dun deserve anything nice

 **that boleyn girl:** ur a wonderful selfless brave queen n no one shld tell u otherwise

 **that boleyn girl:** if tht slut cant see tht then ill kill her

 **katsitter:** stop looking for excuses to fight with jane…

 **katsitter:** besides me being scared of him is just occasional so im fine

 **katsitter:** r we still on for film nite?

 **that boleyn girl:** totes

 **that boleyn girl:** annas going to the star library with her new 'fren'

 **katsitter:** cut her some slack

 **katsitter:** its not every day she makes a new fren

 **that boleyn girl:** can i play some porn for tonite?

 **katsitter:** sure

 **that boleyn girl:** wait rlly??

 **katsitter:** if u invite both linlin n jane

 **that boleyn girl:** why do i hv to invite jane

 **katsitter:** u need to start getting along with her

 **katsitter:** u shld create a grp with all of us

 **that boleyn girl:** i hate u

 **katsitter:** love u too cuz

* * *

**[henry viii's ex-wives]**

_**[3.11 PM]** _

**that boleyn girl added KweenCleves into the group.**

**that boleyn girl added katsitter into the group.**

**that boleyn girl added Regrets &Coffee into the group.**

**that boleyn girl added Mentally Dead into the group.**

**that boleyn girl added J.S. into the group.**

**that boleyn girl:** im regretting this

 **Mentally Dead:** Okay, who forced you to do this?

 **that boleyn girl:** who else

 **Mentally Dead:** … Jane?

 **J.S.:** What? No! I don't even have her number!

 **J.S.:** How did you even get mine anyways?

 **that boleyn girl:** who else

 **Regrets &Coffee: **Animosity aside, having a group chat with all six of us makes it handy to contact each other.

 **Mentally Dead:** Under what circumstances will this be useful?

 **KweenCleves:** to worship kat?

 **Mentally Dead:** Damn, that's actually a good reason

 **Regrets &Coffee: **When in doubt, start a cult.

 **that boleyn girl:** this grp isnt to create a kitty cult

 **that boleyn girl:** its just for convensinece

 **J.S.:** Your spelling is atrocious.

 **that boleyn girl:** u r this close to getting beaten up istg

 **katsitter:** wht cuz means to say is tht we want all of u to come for film niteeeee

 **katsitter:** except cathy n anna ofc

 **katsitter:** i kno u hv a date

 **J.S.:** Pardon me, but isn't that a bit too hasty since it has only been a week both of you have known each other?

 **KweenCleves:** cathys not henry

 **KweenCleves:** i didnt meet her over tinder

 **KweenCleves:** n shes a regular at the cafe i work at

 **katsitter:** more like the only person tht goes to ur cafe...

 **Mentally Dead:** I don't give two fucks about your relationship, just save the fucking for the fifth date

 **Mentally Dead:** Also don't brag about your equipments because faking it is way harder than it looks

 **that boleyn girl:** ^^^^^^

 **Regrets &Coffee: **Should I be concerned that all your minds are in the gutter?

 **Regrets &Coffee: **We're just going to the planetarium and see the stars.

 **Regrets &Coffee: **No sex involved.

 **KweenCleves:** yea sheesh

 **KweenCleves:** im not anne boleyn the maneater

 **that boleyn girl:** excuse me wht

 **katsitter:** u dun kno???

 **katsitter:** the whole sch calls u tht

 **that boleyn girl:** n u didnt think to defend me???

 **katsitter:** ur rlly a maneater tho

 **that boleyn girl:** I HV A MONO SEX THING WITH MS ARROGANT HERE

 **that boleyn girl:** DO I LOOK LIKE I FUCK WITH OTHERS???

 **KweenCleves:** mind says yes instinct says yes bitch

 **J.S.:** You do have a less than savoury reputation...

 **that boleyn girl:** ok slut ur so dead

 **Mentally Dead:** Can you not blame Jane for everything pear-shaped in your life?!

 **Mentally Dead:** Consider that she has to deal with the rumour that you two are dating!

 **J.S.:** I'm sorry, what?!

 **that boleyn girl:**...i mean i wld tap tht if i like u but i hate ur guts

 **J.S.:** I'm neither a sexual object nor am I a slut!

 **katsitter:** yea!

 **katsitter:** shes a very soft n warm pillow!

 **Regrets &Coffee: **Wow, you're now reduced to a personal pillow.

 **that boleyn girl:** ok ok fuck off lovebirds

 **that boleyn girl:** r u down for film nite or nah

 **Mentally Dead:** What are we watching?

 **that boleyn girl:** smth kitty approved dun worry

 **J.S.:** I'm very relieved to hear that.

 **Mentally Dead:** Good thing we have Kat here to keep the peace, want us to swing by during dinner or after?

 **that boleyn girl:** before dinner

 **that boleyn girl:** we r not cooking shit

 **that boleyn girl:** tht pot costed me 24 pounds

 **KweenCleves:** u mean the one we burnt??

 **that boleyn girl:** no shit sherlock

 **KweenCleves:** i blame jane

 **katsitter:** no blaming jane

 **Regrets &Coffee: **I'm staying out of this.

 **Mentally Dead:** You're just saying that because you still want her to clean up your room

 **Regrets &Coffee: **Wait, how the fuck did you know about that?!

 **Mentally Dead:** I came back home early one time and saw her vacuuming the whole house

 **Mentally Dead:** Ever since then, I got her to help us clean the whole place

 **J.S.:** Sometimes I feel like Cinderella, except I get to take a bath with their money.

 **J.S.:** I should get them to pay me too!

 **katsitter:** thts still being takjen advantage of

 **Regrets &Coffee: **Five pounds an hour?

 **Mentally Dead:** Darling, we're not as broke as our juniors

 **that boleyn girl:** u take tht back

 **katsitter:** both of u srsly

 **katsitter:** dun be lazy n clean ur own hse

 **that boleyn girl:** ya dun be lazy

 **katsitter:** tht goes for u too

 **that boleyn girl:** fuck

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> 1\. Should Catherine even have revealed Johanna's dead name to Anna even though the chances of the second-year meeting Johanna is close to zero? Explain your answer. 
> 
> 2\. Jane decided against diagnosing Katherine in her mind. What do you think about unqualified people diagnosing others and how can it impact, be it positively or negatively, the diagnosed people's lives? 
> 
> 3\. Using evidence from the intervention scene as well as Katherine's DMs with Anne, what do they say about Katherine's personality in contrast with how it was presented in the first three chapters? 
> 
> 4\. Should Anne have gotten Jane's number from Katherine without Jane's permission? Why or why not?
> 
> 5\. Is Jane's friendship with Catalina and Catherine really considered friendship? Explain.


	5. Chapter 5

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> As mentioned in Chapter 1, Jane, Anne and Katherine are all related to each other in this story and there might be questions at the end of each questions for you to think/reflect on. Basically similar to Literature books.

"That was fun, we should come back again someday." Catherine said, leaving the planetarium with Anna beside her. They were on their way to get dinner, but haven't decided what they should get. "It's a shame that the planetarium doesn't have a cafe, they would make a killing selling star cookies."

"Ooh, and their drinks can resemble galaxies!"

"Right? They can also serve blackberry pudding and pass them off as black holes!"

"Damn, now I want a black hole pudding." Anna sighed, her stomach rumbling at the thought of said dessert. Catherine chuckled, she was getting hungry herself either way. That still left them with the dilemma of finding a place to eat, neither of them had done their research and hence didn't know what was available in the area. "Hey look, that looks like a family restaurant."

"That's awesome! Let's go in, maybe they serve lobster in there!" Anna gave Catherine a bemused look, allowing herself to be whisked towards the family restaurant. They entered the restaurant, which was bustling with customers waiting for their meals to be served. A waiter ushered them to a table for two, leaving them alone to look through the menu while he attended to another table. "They _do_ have lobster!"

"Shit, really?" Anna was surprised to hear that lobster was actually served at a family restaurant, and flipped through the pages, eventually stopping at a page with a large lobster printed on it. "Well fuck me, there really is lobster."

"I'm definitely ordering this, it's been so long since I had lobster. Oh, I should order some coffee to go with it." Catherine was happily mumbling to herself as she contemplated her choice of coffee, there was too much for her to choose from. Anna, on the other hand, had a hard time deciding if she wanted bangers and mash or fish and chips. Both were equally tasty in her opinion, however her stomach only had space for one main dish. "What about you Anna? What are you getting?"

"I have no idea, it's either pork or fish. Urgh, why must they both look so good?" Anna groaned, she usually wasn't this indecisive when it came to food. Catherine grinned, she was the same when it came to coffee after all. Anna noticed, and pouted at her friend's reaction. "C'mon, don't tease me! You try choosing between lobster dish A and lobster dish B!"

"Oof, that's indeed a hard one." Eventually, Anna settled on the bangers and mash as pork reminded her of Henry, whom she loathed and as such she would enjoy chewing 'Henry' to bits. Catherine flagged down a waiter and gave their order, with him promising to serve their dinners within 20 minutes and briskly made his way into the kitchen. "You're okay with missing film night with Boleyn and Howard for me?"

"Kat usually chooses Disney films, and Anne always suggests porn but eventually chooses some documentary to watch. Plus I'm usually there to ensure that she doesn't _actually_ show us porn." Anna shrugged, she liked Disney movies as much as the next person, but there were only so many Disney movies she could stomach before she got sick of it. Documentaries were a one-way ticket to a snooze fest for her, she couldn't understand how the cousins stayed awake throughout. "Say, you address everyone but me by their surnames. Any reason for the special treatment?"

"I'm partial to your name, it reminds me of an innocent young girl standing at crossroads, not knowing which road to take even though they all will colour her white shadow with experiences she would never dream of."

"I have no idea what the hell you just said, but I'm taking it as a compliment."

"I assure you, it's one hell of a compliment." Catherine meant every word, she felt that Anna's name should be used more often in writing. People tend to dismiss such names, citing that they were boring or had little significant meaning behind its origins. Catherine had always dismissed their opinions, who ever said that names needed to have a significant meaning in another language? "What kind of films do you like?"

"Something that has a good plot. Usually romcoms, not because I'm big on romance but they usually have the most coherent plot. Haven't watched the Austen stuff you recommended yesterday though."

"That's quite alright, I'm confident that you'll join me in Austen hell once you watch the film adaptations. I prefer the traditional ink and paper, but time's a luxury."

"You're starting to sound like an ad."

"Sorry, am I boring you?" Catherine was worried, Catalina and Jane indulged her ramblings since they shared the love for reading with the English major. She didn't think that Anna would be particularly invested in literary works, the muscular woman gave off the impression that she would rather be working out in a gym than getting lost in the library any day.

"Nah, the people in ads are usually charming and they have a nice voice to listen to. About what you said, the traditional bit? I actually agree with you, nothing beats stories penned down on paper. Sure, both directing and being a writer takes a lot of work, but through novels… you can really see the passion and love they put into their works, famous or not. You can use a shit load of CG effects in films, but all writers have are papers, a writing tool and their imagination. There's nothing purer than that."

"... Don't tell Aragón, but you've officially replaced her as my kindred spirit." Anna cracked a smile, relieved that her points made sense. She was never good at expressing herself, and her appearance made it worse for her. Before either of them could continue, a little girl ran up to them, curiosity brimming in her hazel-coloured eyes. "Why, hello there. Do you need something?"

"You two remind me of chocolate women! They're yummy!" A man stormed over to where they were and yanked the girl away, the latter waving at them as she was forcefully led back to another table. Both women said nothing, bursting out in laughter shortly after.

"Ahahaha! She just called us snacks right? Oh god, that was so innocent I can't even!" Anna wiped a tear from her eye, the girl's comment was just too innocent for her to get offended at even though she knew that age wasn't a free pass. Catherine nodded in agreement, unable to form coherent sentences. "Cathy, what kind of a chocolate woman am I?"

"Dark chocolate for sure! Haha!"

"And you'll be milk chocolate! Fuck, we _are_ delicious!"

They were both laughing so loud that the waiter who took their orders had to ask them to keep their voices to a minimum as they were disturbing the other customers, and followed up by apologising that their dinners were taking much longer to prepare.

* * *

**[henry viii's ex-wives]**

_**[9.25 PM]** _

**KweenCleves:** omg i cannot

 **KweenCleves:** im legit in so much pain

 **katsitter:** oh no wht happened

 **Regrets &Coffee: **A girl came up to us and indirectly called us snacks.

 **Regrets &Coffee: **She called both of us chocolate women!

 **KweenCleves:** n said tht we r yummy!

 **katsitter:** tht sounds srsly racist but ok???

 **J.S.:** What kind of chocolate am I?

 **Regrets &Coffee: **You're not even a chocolate.

 **KweenCleves:** probs vanilla???

 **J.S.:** Aw… I like chocolate more.

 **KweenCleves:** wht r u guys watching now

 **katsitter:** im not sure if its lesbian porn or threesome porn

 **katsitter:** either way its basically cuz n linlin but not them

 **KweenCleves:** wtf why did anne choose porn

 **KweenCleves:** theres literally u gujrls there to stop her

 **katsitter:** oh i allowed her to play it if she created the grp chat n play nice with jane!

 **katsitter:** im not watching the porn tho

 **katsitter:** they sound fake n forced n painful

 **Regrets &Coffee: **Ah, it's only considered porn if they're fake, forced and painful.

 **katsitter:** u get me

 **Regrets &Coffee: **How did Boleyn convince Seymour to watch the adult film?

 **J.S.:** "It'll be fun!" - Katherine.

 **J.S.:** "You trust my cousin! Right, slut?" - Anne.

 **J.S.:** "With Kat around, this film night's going to be a kid fest!" - Lina.

 **KweenCleves:** kat u evil gremlin

 **katsitter:** lmao i made a deal with the green devil sooooo

 **katsitter:** anyways

 **katsitter:** we r watching barbie next tho its gd

 **KweenCleves:** oh god n i thot ur taste in shows cant get any worse

 **J.S.:** … I'm the one who wanted to watch Barbie on Netflix…

 **KweenCleves:** OOF

 **Regrets &Coffee: **Honey, why are you regressing?

 **J.S.:** I grew up with Barbie! Don't shame me!

 **katsitter:** i managed to talk her down frm mlp

 **KweenCleves:** a show abt friendship n horses dun sound so bad

 **katsitter:** she wanted to watch the humanoid ver

 **KweenCleves:** gurl u ok???

 **KweenCleves:** u need to get blessed by a priest asap

 **Regrets &Coffee: **This is worse than the intervention we had for her.

 **Regrets &Coffee: **Where are Aragón and Boleyn?

 **katsitter:** comparing their time with our gross ex with the porn

 **J.S.:** Their conversation is not suitable for any audience.

 **KweenCleves:** cant u guys watch smth normal

 **katsitter:** im not watching the tudors again

 **katsitter:** yes they r all very pretty esp me but i dun need a history recap of our past selfs

 **J.S.:** Also, Lina hijacked the remote.

 **that boleyn girl:** suppppp

 **Mentally Dead:** Oh god, the show's depiction of a threesome was better than ours with Henry

 **KweenCleves:** im now very concerned abt how bad is his technique

 **that boleyn girl:** bitch im the one who took in his dick

 **that boleyn girl:** all u had to do was to paw me

 **that boleyn girl:** he was awful at it btw

 **katsitter:** ew ew ew

 **katsitter:** can u not?

 **katsitter:** i dun wanna rmb his noodle

 **J.S.:** Agreed.

 **KweenCleves:** hey at least u gurls got to see the real disappoinmety

 **Regrest &Coffee: **Anna, the one he Photoshopped for you is much better and less traumatic.

 **katsitter:** YES

 **katsitter:** CAN WE NOT TALK ABT MALE NOODLES N START WATCHING BUTTERFLIES?

 **J.S.:** Oh! Mariposa is a great suggestion!

 **that boleyn girl:** fuck me gently with a chainsaw

 **Mentally Dead:** Lord bless my soul and not let the butterflies take them

* * *

**[haus of holbein!!!]**

_**[11.15 PM]** _

**that boleyn girl:** sis where tf u at

 **that boleyn girl:** do i need to give u a curfew next time

 **KweenCleves:** srry the stars r out tonite n we r doing some stargazing

 **katsitter:** sounds fun!

 **KweenCleves:** did catalina n jane go home?

 **katsitter:** um

 **that boleyn girl:** kitty acciednatlly gave jane vodka n shes now twkeinygu against her

 **that boleyn girl:** theres a gap btw them tho so its still not a code red

 **katsitter:** its not my fault

 **that boleyn girl:** bitch its janes

 **katsitter:** its urs gdi

 **that boleyn girl:** n i told u tht it wasnt me!

 **katsitter:** well if u didnt put the vodka bottle in the water section i wldnt hv given her vodka

 **KweenCleves:** ooooooh tht might hv been my fault

 **KweenCleves:** i scraped my knee at hm n i wanted to distninfact it

 **KweenCleves:** i used vodka to clean it

 **KweenCleves:** screamed like a bitch but yea

 **katsitter:** wait

 **katsitter:** u mean i hv been glaring at cuz for no reason??

 **that boleyn girl:** BITCH I DUN CARE IF UR FUCKING THT AUSTEN NERD U COME BACK N APOLOGISE TO ME

 **KweenCleves:** wait how do u kno tht cathy likes austen stuff

 **that boleyn girl:** went into her room once n saw all the austen bks she had

 **that boleyn girl:** it was like an anime fest but with austen merch

 **KweenCleves:** we shld watch pride n prejudice on netflix

 **katsitter:** but we dun hv netflix

 **KweenCleves:** neither does catalina n cathy but they still watch it in their hse

 **that boleyn girl:** omg lol ms arrogant gave me the password to the sluts account

 **KweenCleves:** cathy did too!!!!

 **katsitter:** im telling jane…

 **that boleyn girl:** they hv frozen

 **katsitter:** ok ill tell her some other day

 **that boleyn girl:** >:)

 **that boleyn girl:** btw kitty r u ok with the slut stripping in front of u??

 **katsitter:** they look soft n warm

 **that boleyn girl:** so ur ok with women???

 **katsitter:** uhhhhhh im ok with jane

 **katsitter:** feelings fucking suck

 **katsitter:** wait no i wanna alliertare

 **katsitter:** feelings fucking frustrate

 **katsitter:** there we go :)

 **KweenCleves:** ur feelings r valid ok

 **KweenCleves:** just cuz u dun like others dun mean tht ur not allowed to be ok with jane

 **that boleyn girl:** whatever ur feeling is real n u hv a right to be uncomfortable

 **katsitter:** ok but someone put her to sleep if she starts throwing her knickers arnd

 **katsitter:** gotta protect her modesty aft all

 **that boleyn girl:** i got u covered

 **that boleyn girl:** i knew the knife wld come in handy

 **katsitter:** wtf no not tht kind of sleep!!!

 **katsitter:** anna can u hurry back i dun want cuz to murder jane??

 **katsitter:** n i think jane wears the wonderbra frm holbeins

 **KweenCleves:** hhhhhhhhhh omw

 **KweenCleves:** btw im not fucking cathy???

 **KweenCleves:** just frens here

 **KweenCleves:** or maybe we upgraded to mates

 **katsitter:** literally dun care

 **katsitter:** HHHHHHHH HOLY SHIT JANE RLLY IS WEARING THE WONDERBRA FRM HOLBEINS

 **KweenCleves:** gurl u need to get your priorities checked

* * *

Jane woke up with a start, accompanied with a throbbing headache that had the sole purpose of making her day worse. She surveyed her surroundings, realising that she was in Katherine's bedroom. There was a weight on her legs, and a quick glance showed Katherine sprawled across her legs and by extension the bed. The first-year groaned, groggily waking up and staring blankly at Jane. Said woman paled, memories of the previous night returning to her, particularly the memory of her making Katherine uncomfortable.

"Morning Jane, your clothes are out drying so wait for a bit." Katherine mumbled, rubbing her eyes with her hands. Her green eyes stared at Jane, who had a horrified expression on her face. "What? Oh, yeah I have green eyes. I know, I look weird with them."

"No! You look great with green eyes!" Jane countered, sighing heavily as she ran a hand through her hair. She winced as her hand got itself caught in a tangled portion, and hissed with pain as she yanked her hand (and her hair) free. "I… I'm sorry. For last night, that wasn't like me. And no, that's not an excuse for making you uncomfortable."

"... You were drunk last night, you couldn't have controlled yourself."

"That's not an excuse Katherine, I remember making you uncomfortable and I shouldn't have done so regardless I'm under influence or not."

"It's my fault for giving you alcohol, don't worry about last night. Whatever happens, it's all on me."

"Katherine, no. You're _not_ to blame, this isn't something that you should blame yourself for. _I'm_ the one that made you uncomfortable, this isn't your fault, it's mine." Jane didn't understand why Katherine was insisting that last night was her fault, it was clear that it was Jane's fault for acting in such a way towards the first year. She made a conscious decision to drink the alcohol provided, falsely believing that she wouldn't get as drunk as the last time. "I… I should've stopped drinking after realising-"

"Is Jane up yet?! She has a morning class to attend!" Catalina burst into the bedroom, her hair was in a mess and her clothes were hastily put on. Jane gasped, her legs still trapped underneath Katherine as she reached out for her phone. She found out that she had ten minutes to arrive for her first class that day, and was sincerely considering skipping since it took her half an hour just to get ready. "Jane! Put on some clothes and let's go!"

"But Katherine said that my clothes are drying outside…"

"I can lend you some clothes? They might be a bit too bright for your liking." Katherine offered, holding up the same pink hoodie Anne wore a few nights ago. Jane whispered a few words of gratitude and wore the hoodie, rushing out of the bedroom and out of the apartment with Catalina. Anne snickered as she munched on a sandwich Catalina made for them while waiting for Jane to wake up, she couldn't wait for Jane to realise the state she was in in her haste to get to class.

"How long do you think before that slut notices?" Anne asked Anna, who rolled her eyes as she popped a few breath mints into her mouth. Katherine left her bedroom, groaning about how she needed more sleep and that she didn't want to prepare for her afternoon classes. "Oh, hey Kitty. How are you feeling?"

"Imagine the high from the viral video you made last year, yeah I'm that crash afterwards." Anne chuckled, shoving the remains of her sandwich into her mouth while her cousin was confusedly staring in her direction. "What?"

"Nothing, that slut just left the house with anything to cover her Holbein knickers."

"One, that place doesn't sell underwear for our lower bits. Two, why didn't you tell her? Three, stop calling her a slut for fuck's sake."

* * *

**[SAP]**

_**[10.30 AM]** _

**J.S.:** Today's the worst.

 **Regrets &Coffee: **What did you do?

 **Mentally Dead:** Don't be so quick to blame Jane, she's too good for us

 **Mentally Dead:** But yes, what did you do?

 **J.S.:** More like what I didn't do…

 **Mentally Dead:** You didn't apologise to Kat for last night?

 **Regrets &Coffee: **What did she do last night?

 **Regrets &Coffee: **Also, Anna said that you own Wonderbras from Haus of Holbein.

 **J.S.:** They're cheap…

 **Mentally Dead:** Apart from the realisation that Jane's cup size is smaller than we thought, what did you really not do then?

 **J.S.:** … Wear a skirt.

 **Regrets &Coffee: **I'm laughing so hard right now.

 **Mentally Dead:** Oh right, you were halfway through your striptease last night…

 **J.S.:** Why didn't you say anything Lina?

 **Mentally Dead:** Honey, we were BOTH late for class

 **Mentally Dead:** You think I would notice whether you're fully dressed or not?

 **Regrets &Coffee: **What did Seymour do last night?

 **J.S.:** Made Katherine horribly uncomfortable and she probably hates me now but is too nice to actually say it…

 **Mentally Dead:** Jane, I've known Kat as long as I've known Boloser

 **Mentally Dead:** If she hates you, she wouldn't have allowed you to sleep in her bedroom to begin with

 **Mentally Dead:** In fact, she trusts you

 **Regrets &Coffee: **Who doesn't?

 **Mentally Dead:** She doesn't let any random person into her bedroom

 **Mentally Dead:** I won't say the reason, but if she lets you into her bedroom, consider that as a sign that she trusts you

 **J.S.:** Oh.

 **J.S.:** That's not something she does because she's nice?

 **Mentally Dead:** Girl, she left Boloser outside the first night together and they're on good terms

 **Mentally Dead:** Thanks for leaving me inside the bathtub by the way

 **J.S.:** Oh! You're welcome! :)

 **Mentally Dead:** That was sarcasm

 **J.S.:** :(

 **Regrets &Coffee: **Want me to drop by your place and grab a few clothes for you to choose from?

 **J.S.:** Please return my spare key.

 **Regrets &Coffee: **This isn't your spare.

 **Regrets &Coffee: **I made a copy of your copy.

 **Mentally Dead:** Oh, make me a copy too thanks

 **J.S.:** You two might as well move into my house and pay me rent…

 **Mentally Dead:** Hot damn, let's do that!

 **Regrets &Coffee: **Yup, our lease ends in December anyways.

 **J.S.:** Wait, what?!

* * *

"Unbelievable, Cathy and Lina are planning to move into my house. I mean, I don't mind! They seem pretty easy to live with, but… I don't know, is stealing my Netflix password really a friendship thing?" Jane was at the cafe Anna worked at during said woman's shift, with the latter listening while cleaning the coffee machine. The fourth-year usually wouldn't stop by any of the cafes found on campus, but she wanted someone to talk to and she didn't want to bother Katherine. Anne was a no-go, and her two friends were the reason for her internal conflict, leaving her with Anna.

"No, but asking if they can use your account is. By the way, we have your Netflix password and we want to ask for your permission as a formality because knowing Anne, she's probably abusing it as we speak."

"Oh dear lord… I guess that's fine. Just create another user under my account."

"Thanks! Anyways back to you, I _think_ this is just their way of showing their friendship? I mean, sure they used you to clean their house and they hijacked your Netflix account a few times-"

"I'm fairly sure they do so every week."

"-but they also have your back when you're in deep shit right? They make you laugh when you botched a paper, they're there for you when your pet plant dies, and they're ready to throw hands when some arse traps you in a corner."

"... Leafy is still alive though."

"Wasn't expecting you to actually have a pet plant but okay, point is that they may be moochers like us, but they're always there for you. That, and they've pretty good grades. They make good study buddies when exams creep 'round the corner." Anna shrugged, offering Jane a chocolate coated doughnut. "Here you go, it's on the house."

"Really? Is your manager okay with you giving out free doughnuts?"

"Anything that's two days old's on the house." Jane grimaced, but took the stale doughnut nonetheless. Thanks to Catherine, she was now fully dressed. Her reputation mitigated the impact of her undress earlier, people blamed it on Anne for pranking her and that Jane was studious enough to never skip classes no matter what. She was reluctant to thank Anne, but made a note to do so either way. "It's getting colder lately."

"It's going to be December in a few days… oh, and I should start preparing for Lina's birthday." Jane commented, starting to panic as she recalled that she hadn't made any plans to celebrate Catalina's birthday. Not to mention that Catalina and Catherine were moving in December, exactly _when_ in December was still not known. "They better at least inform me when they're moving in so that I can prepare…"

"If you got anything you wanna vent, just text me. Or Kat, she's plenty free when it comes to you."

"I… I couldn't, not after last night."

"She doesn't blame you, she yelled at me after you left about mixing up the vodka bottle with the one that has water."

"... Aren't vodka bottles different from the normal water bottles?"

"The old one had a crack on the side and we transferred it to a bottle meant to contain water."

"I'm… I'm not even going to ask what prompted the three of you to transfer it into a water bottle of all things."

* * *

"You really didn't need to help us move in, you're already being kind by letting us move in." Catalina said to Jane as the former gently lifted a box away from her friend. Jane pouted, she wanted to help her friends move in as she needed a distraction from her studying. It was unfortunate that her exams came around this period, and as studious as Jane was, all she wanted was to let her hair down. Within reason of course. "By the way, we're sorry."

"For what?"

"You know, getting you to clean our previous place without any compensation, mooching off your Netflix account without your permission, moving in here without much notice. Kat's right in saying that we're both taking advantage of you, and we're pretty shitty friends for doing so." Catherine replied, grunting under the weight of the box she was carrying. Jane reached out to help, but Catherine wouldn't allow her to help carry the box. "Nope, you're just going to stand there and look pretty."

"I appreciate the apology, but really, allow me to help you both with the boxes. They clearly look heavy." Jane protested, but her two friends were having none of it. After talking with Katherine and Anne (much to Catalina's reluctance), they agreed that they should apologise to Jane personally the moment they saw her. "Besides, you two are splitting the bills with me."

"What bills?"

"Electricity and water bills. I _do_ own that house after all." Catherine nearly dropped her box in surprise, she didn't know that Jane was the original owner of the house. She had assumed that Jane was also renting the house from a land owner, just that she was lucky enough to rent a whole house. Catalina hummed in agreement, that made sense to her. "Cathy? What's with that face?"

"You _own_ this place?!"

"I didn't buy it with my own money, my father bought it for me after telling him that I plan to stay in London even after I graduate." Jane explained, fidgeting awkwardly as she simply stood there while watching her friends move boxes into the house. She didn't want her father buying a house for her, she only relented after her father insisted that it would be a long-term investment. "... Should we have a housewarming party for you two?"

"Honey, _no_. You already have enough on your plate, and aren't exams tomorrow for you?"

"I can say the same for you both."

"Oh please, I'm a Psychology major. I have all the theories memorised as well as their applications."

"And I'm an English major, I'm always flying blind."

"Go study Cathy! I can help you with the boxes!" Catherine stuck a tongue out, she needed an excuse to not study (not like there was much memorisation involved) and moving the boxes provided an excellent distraction. Jane sighed, crossing her arms as Catalina carried the last of the boxes into the house. "Do you need help settling in? I can fix you up with some tea? Or coffee, in Cathy's case."

"Jane, _no_! Just take a damn break, watch some Barbie or something!" Catalina countered, pushing Jane into the living room and onto the sofa. Jane protested, but her new roommates were having none of it. "Sheesh, we can make you tea without burning something down. We're not like those three."

"Aragón, can you add milk into my coffee?"

"Fuck no, you're having tea like us!" Catalina entered the kitchen, leaving Catherine alone with Jane. She whispered to Jane, making sure her voice was as soft as possible so that Catalina wasn't able to hear from the kitchen.

"Seymour, are we still throwing her a surprise party here?"

"Yes, but the problem is keeping her away from here. Any suggestions?"

"Kind of? The real problem is whether we can get it done by the time she's done being distracted."

"Cathy, I want to throw Lina the best birthday party. I don't want anything to go wrong."

"You said that last year! Nothing went wrong!" Catherine groaned, sometimes Jane overreacted and she wished that she would just go with the flow every once in a while. Then again, if she did, she wouldn't be the Jane they all knew and loved (or tolerated in Anne's case). "I'll update the rest."

**[Surprise Birthday Group]**

_**[4.40 PM]** _

**Regrets &Coffee: **Operation Boleyn is a go.

 **that boleyn girl:** cool

 **J.S.:** Cathy, I doubt Anne can keep Lina away for so long…

 **Regrets &Coffee: **Oh you poor soul.

 **Regrets &Coffee: **They can go the whole night.

 **J.S.:** I'm sorry?!

 **Regrets &Coffee: **[seymourblushing.jpg]

 **Regrets &Coffee: **This is for you Howard.

 **katsitter:** awwwwww she looks so cute going red!!!

 **katsitter:** her ears!!!!

 **katsitter:** but yeah cuz can do it all night long literally

 **KweenCleves:** dun they need to take a break?

 **katsitter:** whether its hatefucking or fwb they can do it for min 12hrs

 **J.S.:** Oh dear lord…

 **KweenCleves:** DAISDHUBJDHADSOIHFAOI HOW?????

 **Regrets &Coffee: **Trust me, I was kept up all night because of them.

 **Regrets &Coffee: **I'm mentally scarred.

 **that boleyn girl:** not like we showed u our sex tape

 **katsitter:** U HV A SEX TAPE??????

 **KweenCleves:** damn gurl

 **J.S.:** Get rid of that video!

 **that boleyn girl:** why do u care slut?

 **J.S.:** It can be used for blackmail!

 **that boleyn girl:** i dun hv anything to hide

 **J.S.:** Not you, Lina!

 **that boleyn girl:** everybody chill we dun actually hv a sex tape

 **katsitter:** i dun think linlin wld want u to record anywas…

 **Regrets &Coffee: **So can I trust you to fuck her until we're ready?

 **J.S.:** Will I be seeing her around now that Lina moved in…?

 **Regrets &Coffee: **Traumatise you, or traumatise Howard, that's the question.

 **J.S.:** Okay yeah, you're right.

 **J.S.:** Just… keep it normal?

 **KweenCleves:** ur definition of normal n their definition may be rlly differebt

 **katsitter:** yea totes agreeing with anna

 **that boleyn girl:** ok look apart frm threesomes anal n choking we r normal

 **J.S.:** Please stop talking about this.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> 1\. Should Catherine and Anna have taken the girl's comment in stride or should they have informed her about the implications of her words? Explain.
> 
> 2\. Is there really an age limit when it comes to films/shows? Explain.
> 
> 3\. What is your opinion on sharing someone's Netflix account with others?
> 
> 4\. Is Katherine really responsible for Jane like what she believes? Why do you think that she insisted she was to blame for Jane's drunkenness?


	6. Chapter 6

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> As mentioned in Chapter 1, Jane, Anne and Katherine are all related to each other in this story and there might be questions at the end of each questions for you to think/reflect on. Basically similar to Literature books.

"Ms Arrogant! Perfect timing, I need your help finding something!" Anne said as she briskly walked up to Catalina, who was mildly annoyed. For once, it wasn't because of Anne. She was annoyed because she had crossed paths with Henry, and naturally the latter tried to bring her down and mocked her for being a spinster. "... Hey, you okay?"

"Eh, it's just Henry. Said stupid things as usual, and on my birthday no less." Catalina shrugged, a faint smile tugging at her lips. Anne frowned, she, of all people, knew that Henry still had an effect on Catalina, no matter how much the latter tried to put on a front. At one point, Catalina _did_ love Henry and nothing would change that fact. "Anyways Bo-loser, you needed me to find something?"

"Hm? Oh, right. I'm pretty sure I lost it at home, but I can't find it." Anne sighed, tugging on her scarf uncomfortably. She wasn't used to wearing scarves, but it was necessary in keeping Catalina away from ruining her own surprise party. "... It's my choker."

"I figured, given that you _never_ wear scarves. How did you even lose it?"

"No fucking clue, woke up this morning and found it missing." Anne omitted that Katherine had her choker as they spoke, they didn't want Catalina to actually find the 'missing' choker should they hide it away in their flat unit. Catalina frowned, clearly displeased at the turn of events. That confused Anne, why wasn't Catalina making a snide comment about her 'losing' her choker like usual? "... Are you _sure_ you're okay? Usually you lecture me for not keeping my room clean."

"I know that choker is important to you, why the fuck will I kick you down?!" Catalina snapped, surprising Anne. The last time Catalina got that mad, it was when she stole Henry from her and they had an argument that nearly involved the police. Even then, she wasn't really sure if Catalina was angry at her for stealing Henry, or at Henry for cheating on his secondary school sweetheart. Catalina's expression softened, averting her eyes away from Anne. "Sorry for that outburst. How's the scar?"

"I'm still kicking, though I wish Henry's rotting in jail." Anne grumbled, tugging her scarf such that it covered her neck as much as possible. Like the queen that had the same name to her, they both had neck wounds. Unlike the queen, her head wasn't chopped off. "I take that you're gonna help me search for that damn choker?"

"Of course, besides I'm not allowed to go back to Jane's house. She said that she's going to teach Kat how to cook while Catherine and Anna are on standby if it goes pear-shaped." Anne nodded, impressed that Jane cooked up a lie to prevent Catalina from making a surprise trip back to their house. They headed back to Anne's flat, the unit where she lived was eerily silent. "... I'm not used to seeing your place without Kat or Anna."

"I know right? It's creepy as fuck." Anne agreed, locking the door behind her once they were both inside. Catalina had briefly considered asking both Jane and Anne if the rest could move into Jane's house, but didn't. She quickly realised that Jane's house wasn't able to accommodate six permanent residents, and Catalina knew that Anne was too stubborn to move. Anna might be open to the possibility, but Katherine was just as stubborn as her cousin. Not to mention that Anne's parents were paying for their rent, which meant they didn't have to work part-time like Anna and could focus on their education. "Good thing I'm never home when those two are out."

"Are you scared?"

"... I can't afford to, that's not how life works." Anne's reply had an air of finality to it, and Catalina reluctantly dropped the topic. She knew that she wasn't qualified to decide what coping methods were healthy, but she knew that Anne's preference to bottle up her emotions and thoughts behind a fun-loving front wasn't of much help. "Anyways, you search outside and I'll search the rooms."

"I don't think your choker will be outside, but sure." Anne removed her scarf and threw it to the sofa, revealing a scar running across half of her neck. She was extremely uncomfortable wearing anything that wasn't her choker, and she wouldn't admit it, but she also felt uncomfortable not wearing anything around her neck. Catalina nodded and headed for the kitchen, muttering about how it still smelt burnt.

Anne entered her bedroom, starting to undress herself. She wasn't sure if Catalina was in the mood to have sex with her after her interaction with Henry, but she promised the rest to keep her occupied for at least five hours. She stared at a mirror she kept in her bedroom, examining her corset with unease. She was starting to regret purchasing a corset from Haus of Holbein, but she figured that it would keep Catalina intrigued, and perhaps the effort needed to remove the damn corset would easily give her friends a half an hour head start. She grabbed a plastic rose on the table, no doubt it was one of Katherine's props for her practical examinations. Why it was in her bedroom and not Katherine's was beyond her, and it wasn't the time to start asking questions.

"Your choker isn't out here, any luck on your end?" Panicking, Anne bit the stalk and laid on the bed as sexily as she could. She preferred to not prop her head up with her hand and lie on her side, but at least she knew that she could make it sexy enough for Catalina to ask some questions. Catalina entered Anne's bedroom, her hazel eyes widening as she saw Anne on the bed. "The hell?! What happened to finding your choker?!"

"I gave up. How do I look?" Catalina felt her face heating up, was Anne actually wearing a corset? She felt that Anne was setting her up, but she didn't mind. Anything was better than dealing with Henry, including Anne. Recently, Catalina didn't know how she felt with Anne. They had known each other for four years now, and what was initially mere hate-fucking became something less spiteful for Catalina at one point. She would have to raise her concerns with the woman in question at one point, but now… "Well? Am I sexy enough to break England from the church yet?"

"Ha! You're sexy enough to break the Vatican up, happy?" Catalina locked the door behind her, strutting towards Anne while the latter smirked. The Psychology major took a seat beside Anne on the bed, taking care to not forcefully push her down on her back. "Did you seriously go back to Haus of Holbein just to get this?"

"Does it matter?" Anne replied, grinning away upon seeing the lust in Catalina's eyes. She loved seeing Catalina hot and bothered, and wondered if the latter would be willing to spend half an hour attempting to remove the corset that took Katherine an hour to help her wear it. "Don't suppose you could help me out of this fancy straitjacket?"

"... It'll be my pleasure, _Anne_."

* * *

It's half past seven, where are they?" Jane asked, waiting for Catalina and Anne to show up. The rest had completed the necessary preparations for Catalina's birthday party, and were occupying their time by watching shows on Netflix using Jane's account. "Why are we watching an Austen film?"

"Well, Cathy recommended it. Besides, I don't wanna watch some Barbie flick." Anna shrugged, her stomach rumbling as she sipped on her soda Jane had offered. The Astronomy major wanted to sneak a bite of the cake, but was forbidden from doing so. Catherine and Katherine sighed, they were getting hungry but they knew that Catalina and Anne would be showing up extremely late. "Can I at least have a bite of the pie in the fridge?"

"That's for tomorrow's breakfast, not tonight."

"Shame, Anne's probably gonna straddle Catalina and ride her whole night."

"She better not, not when we've prepared a feast for her!"

"And by 'we', you meant you and some higher being?" Katherine asked, glancing at Jane. She had tried teaching the Theatre major how to cook, but ended up starting a fire. Jane could never understand how it was possible that the meat burnt so quickly, all her stoves were electric too. Eventually, she delegated Katherine to chop the vegetables since she proved to be talented at ruining anything she touched while cooking.

"No Katherine, you helped a lot." Katherine gave her a pointed look, she didn't need Jane to spare her feelings. Jane sighed, running her hand through her blonde hair. "Alright, you may have impressed me with your… talent in sending food into blazes of glory, but you were an expert at chopping the veggies."

"Oh please, burning food is effortless. No need Kat to show you, even I can do that!" Anna interrupted, a toothy grin sent their way as Catherine rolled her eyes in the background. Katherine mirrored her roommate's grin, which sent Jane chuckling. "Looks like you've a fan, Kat."

"If you want to see the best fires, you should get Anne to cook! She's always causing fires to explode out of nowhere, like a magician!" Jane shuddered, she didn't need Anne burning down her kitchen. She would prefer not to explain to her father why her kitchen and possibly the house burnt down, and she would like to keep it that way. "You're a very good planner Jane."

"Oh, it's nothing."

"Sure looks like something though."

"I have nine siblings, I planned all their birthdays without my parents' help." Katherine raised an eyebrow, noting that Jane didn't sound too enthusiastic talking about her siblings. She assumed that the Education major would be excited to talk about her family, given that religion and family usually went hand in hand. She decided against pressing it, just like how she preferred Jane to not dabble in her personal affairs, she wouldn't do so to Jane's. "... It's nice that you have a good relationship with your cousin."

"Not… not all of them." Katherine mumbed under her breath, gaining Jane's attention. The latter wondered if they were close enough to ask, but didn't want to risk ruining their budding friendship. Over a month of friendship wasn't close enough to warrant asking personal questions, and Jane didn't want to be nosy. "... You're not gonna ask?"

"I'll ask nothing that you're not comfortable sharing."

"... You're too kind, so kind that I can hardly believe it." Catherine nudged Anna, who gave her a pointed look in return. Catherine nodded, observing Jane and Katherine silently with her blue eyes. At that point, no one was really watching the Austen movie, apart from Anna's sporadic glances at the television screen. "And yet… I feel like I want to share something with you. Something harmless, but meaningful."

"Oh right Cathy, Anne said that you were a huge Austen nerd! Mind showing me some of her novels?" Anna, sensing that the conversation was taking a personal turn, decided to lead Catherine away from Jane and Katherine. Catherine easily agreed, she had no intention of listening to a private conversation. "She mentioned that it was like an anime fest but with Austen."

"I'm also a Brontë nerd, how the fuck did Boleyn even know about my admiration for female writers?" They entered Catherine's room, leaving Jane and Katherine alone with the movie still playing in the background. Katherine intertwined her fingers together, while Jane tapped her left foot in order to keep herself distracted.

"... The day when we first met, the man that I had an altercation with? He's my cousin, Thomas Culpeper."

"He doesn't seem to hold much familial love for you." Katherine said nothing, considering if she should elaborate. Jane furrowed her eyebrows, the name rang a bell, but she couldn't remember where she had seen Thomas before. She brushed it off, it was something she could think about during her own time. "What do you want to know about me?"

"Anything that you're willing to share, I'll even settle for a convincing lie." Jane frowned, Katherine was definitely hiding something, something that Jane didn't dare to imagine. She wasn't confident that she could handle what Katherine hid in her closet, and she figured that the first-year didn't want her to. Jane thought about her life, running her fingers against a mental shelf filled with books containing her memories. She eventually settled on telling Katherine more about her personality, it was the least she could do given her efforts to reach out to the fourth-year.

"I'm the seventh among us ten, neither old or young enough to gain much of my parents' attention. I guess you could say that I grew up to be quite a people-pleaser, I did crave for the attention, the good kind of course."

"Did your family love you?"

"Enough to buy me this house, but not enough to have me back for Christmas. Something about not enough room, I didn't ask for an elaboration."

"Do you like Christmas?"

"... I dislike the holiday. Somehow my parents forget to get me something every year, and I usually get the leftovers from dinner. I was never fast at eating." Jane bitterly laughed, she was coming off as extremely petty to her friend and she knew it. "I would've been satisfied with a lump of coal honestly. Anything's better than nothing. Maybe buying me this house is my father's way of apologising."

"You mentioned that your beliefs have been shaped by your parents?"

"It wasn't the kind of wanting your children to be on the right path, it was closer to having allies to back you up. We all got love from them, I won't deny that. But sometimes, I wished that they gave me a little more." Jane had a wry smile on her face as she angled her head towards Katherine, the latter having a serious expression on her features. "I'm not as kind or selfless as you think Katherine, I'm just as greedy as anyone on the street."

"Is that why you insist on helping others? Are you hoping for validation?"

"Well, you've got me all figured out. I'm not very good at maintaining an air of mystery like your cousin." Katherine had no reply to Jane's remark, she didn't expect Jane to be seeking attention from others. Catalina had once told her that true altruism didn't actually exist, and Katherine saw that Jane was no exception. "I'm going to contact Lina, I don't suppose you could contact your cousin?"

"Not a problem, and Jane?" Katherine gave her friend a meaningful look, one that made Jane uncomfortable with its sincerity. "If there's anything you wanna talk about, and I mean _anything_ , I'm available."

"... And I as well Katherine."

* * *

"Great, I've officially made you late to your own surprise birthday party." Anne breathlessly chuckled as she left Katherine's messages to her on read. Catalina did the same to Catherine's messages, grinning at the woman lying nude beside her on the bed. "But hey, I gave you one hell of a birthday present."

"Sure did, first time you actually gave me something."

"Hey, I did fuck you afterwards for all the previous years!"

"Never on my birthday, and they were all hate-fucking."

"Aw, I thought you liked hate-fucking?"

"Something fluffy is nice once in a while." Catalina sighed, should she bring up the question now? Should she risk ruining whatever they had after a pleasant session together? Catalina wasn't sure, this was one problem that none of her friends nor family could help her with. "Is the birthday girl allowed to ruin the nice mood we have?"

"Way to suggest that we have pillow talk, but sure. We're already late enough as it is, let's hope Kitty doesn't come looking for us."

"How do you define our current relationship?" Anne flinched, this wasn't the question she expected. She was expecting Catalina to resume their previous conversation about coping methods and was fully prepared to be vulnerable with her, but she was caught off guard. She let out a heavy sigh, she had no answer to give, not that she didn't want to.

"I don't know, I truly don't. At first, it was plain and simple hate-fucking. But… after bonding a bit over Henry and hanging out outside of our nightly activities, I… I guess the line has been blurred for me. What about you?"

"Honestly? The line was smudged when I first saw you, and you smudged it even further when you proposed this relationship shortly after you broke up with Henry."

"... That's pleasing to hear." Anne hummed, turning to face Catalina. She never did so during the nights they spent together on the same bed, she made it a rule to never look at her one-night stands' faces after the deed was done. "Tell me, if you ever… swung the other way, do you think we could make things work?"

"Maybe? I don't know, you don't exactly let people in."

"I let you in me pretty often if I do say so myself."

"I meant emotionally, not physically. Of course, I enjoyed the feeling of you clamping down on me."

"... It's not easy being vulnerable Catalina, you've seen how Kitty ended up."

"And you've seen her picking up the pieces and coming back stronger than ever. Both of you are made from the same mould, I know it." Catalina meant every word she said, and she wasn't planning on getting Anne to finally open up with her. If she did, that would be ideal but Catalina knew better than to hope. "I'm not trying to be mean here, but you know better than Kat. Why are you so afraid of letting people in?"

"It's _exactly_ because I know better than her that I'm… not thrilled to let my heart get broken from allowing my guard to slip." Anne avoided saying that she was scared, not explicitly saying it made her feel less vulnerable. "I'll admit that recently, I… _care_ more for you than previous years. But if we're talking about whether we'll make things work emotionally, I may hurt you. So honestly? I personally don't think us together will work out."

"Sometimes, people need to take risks and be open to the possibility that they'll end up broken at the end of a relationship. That's when you know whether you've truly loved someone, I know I did with that fucking arsehole." Anne sighed, sitting up on her bed. Catalina did the same, with plans to prepare to head back for her birthday party. She hoped that Anne would at least consider being more open, regardless in a relationship or just with her friends. "Let's get going, before Jane thinks that we're both dead in a gutter."

"Ha! You think she'll be delighted if that happens to me!"

* * *

"Why would I be glad to hear that you're dead? Granted, I won't be devastated… but I certainly don't wish you dead." Jane replied after Catalina recounted what Anne had said to her an hour ago. Anna was blissfully stuffing her face with food after being deprived for two hours, with Catherine admiring her as she nearly missed her food and was about to stab her hand with her fork. Anne rolled her eyes, not believing that Jane wouldn't want her dead. "I mean it! I don't even wish _Henry_ dead, why would I wish that on you?"

"Seymour, you're too nice. Your kindness is wasted on him." Catherine remarked, pointing her fork at Jane, who leant back out of fear that Catherine would actually stab her. The rest nodded, save for Anna who was still eating. "Anyways, are you all going back home for Christmas?"

"Nope, my parents are in Sweden now. They better bring me back something cool afterwards." Anna replied, sighing with satisfaction after licking her plate clean. Jane and Catalina cringed with disgust, they had just watched Anna licking her plate to clean off the crumbs. Jane made a note to get Anna wash the dishes later, or at least her own. "What about you Cathy?"

"They're in France now, not sure why but I _think_ it's for their anniversary? God, I probably should start paying attention to their affairs- wait no that was a poor choice of a word."

"Mine said that I'm not allowed to come back unless I bring a boyfriend. Since we all know that I'm single for years now, I'm not going back anytime soon. Besides, they're currently in Spain visiting my abuela. So yeah, I'm staying in London."

"You girls are lucky, my family's coming to visit us on Christmas Eve. I'm so not looking forward to seeing Mary again. She's insufferable." Anne groaned, throwing her head backwards. Katherine stared in shock, she didn't hear anything about her relatives visiting them during the Christmas period. "And that womanising bastard's probably tagging along too."

"Oh god, I don't want to see George…" Katherine sighed, she didn't have good memories with him and she didn't want to relieve them. She usually avoided him as much as possible, and was glad that he married a woman who knew nothing about his womanising ways. She did pity her cousin-in-law, but Katherine needed someone to divert his attention elsewhere and said cousin-in-law fitted the bill. "Is she still with Jane?"

"Me?"

"Not you slut, you're not the only Jane in London." Anne shrugged, her brother's marriage was a mystery even to his direct family. All she heard was that George was still sleeping around despite his wife being faithful and loving, she wondered if his wife knew about his affairs with other women. Hell, she hadn't seen her sister-in-law before given that they didn't hold a wedding ceremony. "Anyways, we'll find out in a few days. I'm more concerned about my sister, she's definitely going to ask about Henry."

"Tell her that she deserves that second-rate manwhore." Catalina suggested, earning herself an appreciative smirk from Anne.

"Wish I could tell her to fuck off, but nah. Gotta have to keep things civil." Anne turned her attention on Jane, who was playing with her food as she hoped for her friends to forget about asking about her plans for Christmas. "So, slut-"

"I don't suppose you can address me by another term, perhaps my given name?" She had enough of being called a slut, the insult was ironic considering that she only slept with Henry, and that was a one time thing. Anne shrugged, the reason why she had always called Jane a slut was because she knew too many Janes and addressing her by her surname just wasn't her thing.

"Okay okay, how 'bout Plain Jane?" Jane felt her heart stop, she thought that by pursuing her higher studies in London and away from her hometown, she would be able to escape that dreaded nickname. She said nothing, sending Anne a look that was balanced perfectly between a scowl and polite disapproval. "... Right… how about Janey?"

"That sounds like an appropriate term." Jane was satisfied with the new nickname, but the rest was curious to know the usually patient woman's brief but terrifying change in demeanour. Especially Katherine, ever since their one-sided (at least that was how Katherine felt) heart-to-heart conversation, she wanted to learn more about her senior. Given the way she reacted towards Anne, the Theatre major quickly deduced that the nickname was a sore topic for Jane, possibly bullying. "Oh, how about we have a Christmas party here? I'm rather eager to start planning again!"

"Yay to the party, nay to you planning. You should take a break and relax! Our exams are almost over, use that time to unwind or something!" Catherine exclaimed, not wanting Jane to possibly burn out from overwork. Catalina nodded in agreement, Anne had informed her that not only had Jane spearheaded her birthday party, she was the one who did the most preparations leading up to today. "Let Boleyn plan or something!"

"That's going to stress me out even further, besides her family's visiting on the eve."

"Not gonna lie, I'm chaos on heels. Cat, you plan it." Anne directed the responsibility to Catalina, who grumbled in protest before reluctantly agreeing. She didn't want to ruin Christmas for Jane, she had a feeling that the Education major loved Christmas due to her upbringing in a religious family.

"You better help me Bo, I don't trust Catherine enough to return if I send her to get supplies. Damn girl stayed in the bookstore until closing time when I made her go on a supply run." The four others stared at them in shock, the two women in question failing to realise the reason behind their shock. They didn't even notice until Anna coughed, gaining their attention. "Oh, do you want to help us with the party Anna?"

"I'll pass, gonna cram as many shifts at the cafe until then. So uh… since when you two giive each pet names?" Jane, Katherine, and Catherine stiffened, Anna had asked the very question on their minds and they weren't sure how it would play out. Catalina and Anna looked at each other, their faces paling as they realised what they had done.

"W-What?! No! I mean, we're on good terms right?! What's wrong with calling her something else?!" Anne stammered, hands wildly gesturing as she tried to defend herself. The nickname just slipped out unconsciously, it wasn't even something she had agreed on with Catalina. Catalina mimicked Anne, explaining that they had agreed that their relationship was better compared to years ago. The rest said nothing, staying silent during their defence.

"Oh! How about we do a Secret Santa exchange? It's going to be so fun!" Katherine came to Anne's and Catalina's aid, both of them sighing with relief. Katherine smiled, hiding that she was planning to grill her cousin later regarding the new nicknames. They all agreed on the exchange, with Jane insisting that she wanted to help plan the Christmas party but was shot down by everyone. "It's going to be great and I don't have to see Anne's family!"

"Actually, they wanted to see you too. So yeah, you're stuck with me on that day. We probably need a getaway driver…" Anne started to plot, glancing at Anna meaningfully. Anna flipped her off, she wasn't planning on being a getaway driver when Anne would most undoubtedly lecture her for her driving skills. "But yeah, secret exchange works."

"Great, now let's bring out the cake! Gimme!"

"Anna, calm down. Janey's cake ain't going anywhere."


	7. Chapter 7

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> As mentioned in Chapter 1, Jane, Anne and Katherine are all related to each other in this story and there might be questions at the end of each questions for you to think/reflect on. Basically similar to Literature books.

"Anne, Katherine. It's been a while." Anne said nothing as she opened the door for her family to enter, glaring at her older sister, who sneered back in response. George gave Katherine a charming smile that sent chills up her spine, she never liked him and her dislike was furthered when she moved in with the Boleyns for a few weeks before getting permission to live with Anne. "Is your other roommate out?"

"She's out on a field trip, she's in Astronomy so she needs to spend the day preparing for tonight. And to do some Physics shit, apparently the major's not just about stars." Anne lied, the real reason Anna wasn't around was because both cousins insisted that a visit from the Boleyns would be a tense affair, and Anna would be better off decorating at Jane's place. Anne's father nodded, mildly impressed upon hearing the major. He always appreciated the sciences, and could never fully grasp the nuances of the humanities and arts. "So, what brings you all here?"

"Mainly to check on Katherine, as well as to see whether my money's being well-spent."

"Do you have to bring those two along?" Anne was referring to her siblings, who hung around their mother while Anne chatted with her father, with Katherine by her side. Her father nodded, glancing briefly at his family before turning his attention on Katherine, his bushy eyebrows furrowing upon noticing her dyed hair.

"... I see that your hair is still as bright as ever."

"Y-Yes?" Katherine meekly replied, she knew that her uncle was considered mild amongst her relatives, but his usual poker face never failed to scare her. He nodded briskly, as long as Katherine was able to cope with her studies, he was fine with Katherine's personal preferences. His wife was the one who had issues with Katherine dyeing her hair, and he only supported her back then because he was concerned with his niece's academics.

"I don't see any strangers with you guys. Did the in-laws finally see them for who they are and divorced them?"

"Mary's still happily married, I'm not sure about George. He's being rather secretive with Jane."

"Damn shame, remind me again why my dear sister isn't dead yet?"

"Do you really always have to be like this?" Mary had broken away from her mother and her brother and approached the other group, her younger sister smiling icily while Katherine gave her a quick nod of respect to acknowledge her presence.

"How's William the Second?"

"My husband and I are still happily together. What about you, still single as ever?" Anne rolled her eyes, of course her sister would bring up her romantic life, or rather the lack of it. "Kat, any blokes hanging off you?"

"Back off Mary, we don't need to be in a relationship to be happy. If you're happy with William, then great but don't force that belief down our throats." Anne scowled, defending Katherine before Mary could make Katherine uncomfortable. She knew that Katherine could defend herself, but she preferred if she could make her sister shut up before Katherine had to stand up for herself. "Why? Still upset that Henry dumped you?"

"Oh please, he's just a fling. I take it that both of your love lives are barren then." Mary smiled sweetly as she changed topics, turning to face her cousin. "Since there aren't any males in your life, I assume that you don't have any friends?"

"My friends don't need to be men." Katherine replied through gritted teeth, pink eyes narrowed with building anger as Mary smirked. Anne growled, this was why she hated her sister. She never had anything nice to say about others, blood-related siblings included. "Christmas Eve is a time for peace, can't you at least try to be positive today?"

"I'm just concerned that you're lonely in university! Unless… you're in an intimate relationship with Anne here?"

"Even if I was, it would certainly be healthier than your brother."

"Oh? Is that jealousy I see?" Mary cackled, causing Katherine's frown to deepen. "I don't blame you, Anne here has a reputation of seducing every man she meets… including her dear brother."

"For the last time, there was nothing going on between me and George! What's with you and sibling incest?" Anne grumbled, tempted to strangle Mary on the spot. Katherine frowned, she was aware that the accusation was really directed at Anne and not her. She never knew why Mary accused Anne of incest of all things, and she didn't want to know. Anne led Mary aside, which provided George an opportunity to move towards her.

"Katherine! It's been too long! How have you been?" George placed a hand on her shoulder, his grip tightening as she tried to escape from his grip. Katherine glared at him, she hated it whenever he became too handsy. Not to mention that he had attempted to make moves on her several times while she lived with the Boleyns as well as what Katherine would describe as an attempt to sexually break into her. "Have a boyfriend?"

"I'm not interested in romance for the time being, I want to focus on my studies." That was the truth, Katherine genuinely wanted to focus on her studies now that she was no longer in a relationship with anyone. That wasn't to say that she was opposed to a relationship, but academics certainly was of a bigger priority. George gave her a wolfish grin, leaning in until their noses were touching. "George, you're making me uncomfortable."

"We're cousins, we're supposed to be close. Think of me as a male version of Anne."

"Anne wouldn't invade my personal space if I told her so."

"You've only yourself to blame for being this fit." George crooned, his hand roaming downwards and squeezed Katherine's bottom. Katherine froze, she knew that the appropriate response was to slap his hand away and return to Anne's side. Or her uncle's, hell, even Mary was safer than George. She was saved by the doorbell, and managed to free herself from George to answer it. She smiled as she saw who was on the other end, relieved to see a friendly face.

"Katherine! It's so great to see you, may I enter? It's rather cold outside." Jane smiled in kind, and gave George a frosty glare as she removed her jacket. George scowled back, his eyebrows knitted in confusion as she glanced back at Anne, who was too occupied arguing with her sister to notice Jane's presence. "Your cousin contacted us, saying that your… male cousin wasn't being considerate of your feelings."

"You can swear, I don't mind."

"I'll refrain, but thank you for the offer." Jane stuck close to Katherine, making their way towards where Anne and Mary were. George silently glowered at them, but they paid him no mind. "Good afternoon Anne, I hope I'm not interrupting."

"Oh, Janey. Came here to ask Kitty 'bout the decos right?" Jane nodded, she had prepared a list of decorations needed in case anyone suspected her of showing up without any rhyme or reason. Mary glanced at Jane, examining her from head to toe. She scoffed, clearly displeased with Jane's presence. "What now?"

"Isn't she the bitch that stole Henry from you?"

"Oh, you must be the disappointing Boleyn fling my ex mentioned." Jane extended her hand out, a warm smile on her face. Upon closer examination, her grey eyes were stormy and the only indication that she was incensed with rage. Mary responded in kind, her brown eyes cloudy with disapproval. "It's a pleasure to meet you."

"Likewise, though I can't seem to remember your name. What a shame, considering that your reputation precedes you."

"I can say the same for you, given that I only know you as that other Boleyn girl." Katherine had never seen Jane like that, she was unlike her usual gentle self. That didn't mean she didn't want to see the side that Jane never showed to others, she was in fact left wondering whether there was more to Jane than the one they all knew. "Tell me, is there more to you than being the other Boleyn girl?"

"Watch it, plain jane. You're playing out of your league here."

"Oh my, all I can see is that I'm playing with a harmless dying spark. May I suggest for you to fizzle out somewhere else?" Mary scowled deeply, stalking off. Anne and Katherine silently cheered, with Jane smiling with relief as she left. "That was an experience, certainly not one I would see at home."

"Jane! That was brilliant, you put Mary in her place!"

"I wish I could get my brother to lock your other cousin up, but he looks like the type who can charm the authorities with a single wink."

"Sounds extremely likely, thanks for coming on short notice." Anne mumbled, still not comfortable being in her former enemy's debt. Jane nodded, glaring daggers at George. "Did Cat send you here or were you really just around the area?"

"I came straight here the moment you mentioned Katherine. Lina gave me some details on your family after I said that I'll be coming."

"Did she tell you anything about my mother?"

"Only words that I shan't repeat in polite company." Katherine chuckled, leaning closer to Jane. Anne rolled her eyes, a reluctant smile creeping onto her face. "Well then, how long will they be staying?"

"Hopefully they leave before dinner, I don't trust George to keep his hands to himself."

"How's the Christmas party decorations coming along?" Katherine asked, no longer wanting to talk about her cousins. Jane shrugged, she was still banned from decorating. Catalina did her best to keep her away from decorating as much as possible, Anna and Catherine were all the more willing to help keep Jane away. "Did you already get your present for the exchange?"

"Almost, what about you?" Anne sighed as she was called away by her mother, leaving Jane alone with Katherine. As soon as she was out of earshot, Katherine dropped her smile. "Don't worry Katherine, I'm fine. Christmas with my friends doesn't sound all that bad."

"If you say so…" Katherine trailed off, still worried for Jane. The latter nudged her gently, reassuring her that she was indeed fine. Katherine nodded, playing her with thumbs as she observed her relatives mingling with each other. "... I never liked Christmas, it's… well, George always liked to enter my bedroom on Christmas since it's always held at my old house, he liked undressing me."

"Does Anne know?"

"She does, nothing she can do about it apart from keeping him away from me. Uncle Tom probably knows, doubt that would stop George. He's behaving better than before, so it's fine."

"It's not Katherine, and while I'm in no position to say what should and shouldn't be the case, this kind of behaviour isn't how any relative should behave."

"... Thanks for the concern Jane. Do you mind if I ask you a question?" Jane raised an eyebrow, observing George's behaviours around his family. He was busy interacting with his father, giving Katherine the occasional smug smirk which Jane hated. "Is there a… personal dislike for the nickname both Mary and Anne gave you?"

"What, you mean Plain Jane? Just a silly nickname that people call me by back in Salisbury, can't say that they're particularly wrong. I _do_ look plain, but I was pretty good at hitting the books so I'm well balanced." Jane replied, crossing her arms as George attempted to taunt her by sending her air kisses at her. Katherine grumbled upon realising that George was being his obnoxious self, and hoped that he would leave soon. "Is it too much to lock him up and throw away the key?"

"He taught Anne how to lockpick."

"Fiddlesticks."

* * *

**[henry viii's ex-wives]**

_**[5.40 PM]** _

**that boleyn girl:** jfc they r gone

 **that boleyn girl:** im so glad

 **Mentally Dead:** Good job not killing George

 **katsitter:** jane was abt to kill him tho

 **Regrets &Coffee: **Is this George bloke that bad?

 **J.S.:** You remember Queen Katherine's song in the musical?

 **J.S.:** Now visualise the other queens touching her during her song, that's George.

 **KweenCleve:** damn i wanna punch him now

 **that boleyn girl:** line up behind cat n janey

 **Regrets &Coffee: **And me.

 **that boleyn girl:** nuh uh ur all behind me

 **that boleyn girl:** also someone recommend presents for me?

 **katsitter:** its a secret santa exchange

 **katsitter:** presents r secret

 **Mentally Dead:** If any of you get a bag of coffee beans, you girls know who's it from

 **Regrets &Coffee: **For the last time, I didn't get coffee!

 **Regrets &Coffee: **I'm not some coffee addict!

 **KweenCleves:** press f for doubt

 **that boleyn girl:** f

 **katsitter:** f

 **Mentally Dead:** F

 **J.S.:** No idea what that means but yes, you're horribly addicted.

 **Regrets &Coffee: **Hey!

 **Mentally Dead:** Jane, how were the Boleyns?

 **J.S.:** Not particularly pleasant.

 **J.S.:** Mrs Boleyn was the least pleasant of them all.

 **that boleyn girl:** made a reference to whats under my signature neck ring

 **J.S.:** I'm sorry for listening to a personal topic.

 **that boleyn girl:** ehhh ur bound to know anyways

 **that boleyn girl:** cat for henrys bd lets strip him naked in front of everyronw

 **Mentally Dead:** Dear god do you want to traumatise the school?!

 **katsitter:** oh boy

 **KweenCleves:** hes like a fat statue of david

 **KweenCleves:** if his prick is the same size as david

 **Regrets &Coffee: **Oh you poor innocent dear, it's much smaller.

 **that boleyn girl:** anyways we r gonna take janey out for a spin

 **Mentally Dead:** Just don't do drugs, bring her to a brothel, strip club, burlesque club, or the pub

 **katsitter:** we r going to the gym!!!!

 **J.S.:** Dear lord, please give me strength.

 **Regrets &Coffee: **We love you Seymour, have fun!

 **J.S.:** I'm going to die.

 **KweenCleves:** its easy peasy

 **Mentally Dead:** Send us pictures of her running on the treadmill

 **that boleyn girl:** will do lol

 **J.S.:** You girls make horrible friends.

 **katsitter:** awwww ur gonna be fine!!

* * *

"My heart gave out three times, please don't make me go back in there." Jane's chest was heaving, her clothes drenched with sweat as she laid on a bench outside the gym. Katherine was fanning her, while Anne was laughing breathlessly at the sight before her. Jane wondered what possessed her to agree to exercising at the gym, she was never the active type even when she was a child. "I'm willing to be called inappropriate names if it meant not going back in there."

"Are you okay Jane? When was the last time you exercised?"

"Does running for classes count?"

"Ahaha! Why not?" Katherine cheekily grinned from ear to ear, fondly watching Jane groan with pain. Anne couldn't stop laughing, her sides hurt too much after watching Jane struggle with the treadmills. "Don't worry Jane, you'll be alright. And it's okay, you're already plenty fit in my eyes."

"Much appreciated, but I still can't help feeling like I'm about to move on from this plane of existence…"

"I've taken a lot of pictures and I've sent 'em all to the group chat! My favourite one is when you cried!"

"... Glad that I made you smile at my expense."

"Eh, I needed a little laugh after my family visited. Dad's okay, the rest are intolerable. I just want Mary to stop saying that I had a thing with George. Like bitch, we get that you're crushing hard for your brother, get over it!"

"I personally found Aunt Liz much worse, she kept bringing up your scar. I'm half-surprised you didn't remove your choker and strangle her with it." Katherine remarked, with Anne letting out a disappointed sigh at the remark. She wished she could, and unless she wanted to be charged with murder, she would have to keep her violent thoughts as mere fantasy.

"How your mother implied that Henry was the ideal boyfriend for any woman was beyond my belief, if I may be frank."

"That's something we can all agree on." Anne removed her choker, exposing her scarred neck for the world to see. Jane glanced at the exposed neck, Anne had never mentioned how she had gotten the scar. "Like what you see Janey?"

"Must be uncomfortable wearing a choker while exercising."

"I wouldn't have to if Henry didn't give me a belated birthday present here." Anne pointed to her scar, mustering a cheeky smile even though the nature behind it was anything but harmless. Jane struggled to sit up, requiring Katherine to assist her. "Maybe you should join us for our runs."

"Oh heavens, no. I don't want to put myself through this, not again. I graduated from secondary school with the blissful knowledge that I won't ever have to run again."

"It's fine, it's fine! You're very soft!" Katherine innocently replied, loosely hugging a still sweaty Jane. Jane groaned as Anne smirked, plans to tease Jane started to form. "We should go to a cafe or something! Are any of the cafes on campus still open?"

"I'll ask Anna in the group chat, hopefully there's some shit coffee for Janey here."

**[henry viii's ex-wives]**

_**[6.45 PM]** _

**that boleyn girl:** hey anna r the cafes on campus open

 **that boleyn girl:** janey needs some shit water

 **katsitter:** no she doenst

 **katsitter:** she says tht she wants anything but sch coffee

 **that boleyn girl:** shes getting shit water whether she likes it or not

 **Mentally Dead:** Just give her the one we have at home

 **Mentally Dead:** Catherine needs less of it anyways

 **Regrets &Coffee: **Oh come on I need them…

 **KweenCleves:** cafes in sch r closed

 **KweenCleves:** why tf do u think tht i didnt hv any shifts even tho i wanted some

 **KweenCleves:** oh but i can brew some if u like

 **Regrets &Coffee: **I would love to have some!

 **katsitter:** ur gonna hv food posinninbg

 **Mentally Dead:** Is that why the coffee at Anna's workplace so terrible?

 **KweenCleves:** i dun work there all the time n yet dirtyburns says tht our coffee is shit

 **KweenCleves:** n theres no fire yet so not me making it bad

 **Mentally Dead:** Fuck DirtyBurns, they're just a bunch of psychos with the sole intent to ruin people

 **J.S.:** Are preparations done?

 **Mentally Dead:** You're not coming back home until we're done

 **J.S.:** Even if I promise to not help prepare?

 **Regrets &Coffee: **You'll make us some coffee and make yourself busy in some domestic way.

 **that boleyn girl:** so make her exercise until ur done??

 **J.S.:** Dear lord, anything but that.

 **katsitter:** lets just bring her hm n ask her to make dinner for us

 **that boleyn girl:** ok we swing by the store then

 **that boleyn girl:** maybe get some fancy holbein corsets for janey

 **J.S.:** I don't just peruse the wares at Haus of Holbein!

 **that boleyn girl:** suuuuuuure

 **that boleyn girl:** kitty lets find out her cup size in her sleep

 **katsitter:** no

 **katsitter:** thts an invsiasion of privacy

 **KweenCleves:** 10 pounds its a c

 **Mentally Dead:** I'm betting 15 for a size B

 **Regrets &Coffee: **Any chance for a B-half?

 **that boleyn girl:** 20 for aa

 **Mentally Dead:** OOF BO THAT'S A PAINFUL BURN

 **Regrets &Coffee: **Imagine the padding if it's really AA...

 **J.S.:** Why are all of you betting on my bra size?

 **katsitter:** ya why??

 **katsitter:** why do u need wonderbras

 **J.S.:** It's comfortable, it gives me confidence, and they're cheap.

 **katsitter:** cheap is right…

 **that boleyn girl:** soooooo???

 **J.S.:** I'll be locking the door before I sleep.

 **J.S.:** And no Anne, don't you dare lockpick into my room.

 **Regrets &Coffee: **Please don't say it's really an AA.

 **KweenCleves:** yea i dun wanna lose my money to anne

 **J.S.:** Lord, please leave me in a pub and get myself plastered so that I forget this conversation ever existed.

 **katsitter:** dun u dare get drunk

 **Mentally Dead:** If you two want to leave her there, give her a mannequin for company

 **that boleyn girl:** fineeeee but if she sets that fake body on fire im not responsbled

* * *

"You've been staring at your phone for a while now, expecting someone?" Anne asked, startling Jane. They decided to bring Jane back to their place and force her to sleep over, since she was temporarily banned from returning to her own house. She nearly dropped her phone, almost screaming Anne's head off. "Didn't mean to disturb you from calling your secret lover."

"I-I don't have a partner! I'm just… never mind." Jane shoved the phone back into her pocket, smiling warily at the History major. Anne observed how Jane had tension in her body, notably her shoulders. She repeatedly glanced back to the bathroom where Katherine was, grey eyes flickering between Anne and the bathroom.

"I'm surprised you didn't go back home during this period, since you're from a loving family and all."

"Yes, such a shame isn't it?"

"... Are you on bad terms with your family?"

"Why do you say that?"

"Because for someone who preached about connection and fostering relationships, you sure don't talk much about them."

"My family merely doesn't have enough room to accommodate everyone for Christmas, you must consider my in-laws and the fact that I have nine other siblings."

"... So anyways, how should I repay the favour?" Anne changed topics, seeing that Jane wasn't willing to elaborate on her answers. Jane blinked, staring at Anne as though she had grown two heads. "For earlier, you really saved Kitty."

"There's no need, I was just helping a friend." Jane didn't understand why both cousins assumed that people wanted something done in return. She attributed Anne's remark to her cynical nature, while Katherine was still a mystery to her. "There's actually something that has been on my mind for a while now."

"If it's about my scar-"

"I was about to ask about your hair buns." Jane pointed to the top of her head, referring to the two small buns Anne had tied up. Anne jabbed a finger to one of her buns, perplexed to Jane's question. Yes, she understood what she was asking. What she didn't understand was why _that_ question of all questions. "What? That's a perfectly valid question to ask!"

"True, but like… don't you want to ask something more personal?"

"I certainly never planned on doing so, clearly you have skeletons in your own cupboard."

"... Kitty did this for me when we were both kids, and it stuck." Anne admitted, she didn't have any particular attachment to her signature hairstyle. It was simply a reminder of her happier memories with her cousin, and Katherine was always thrilled to see that her favourite cousin retained the hairstyle she did when she was a child. "Ah, looks like it's my turn to take a bath."

"Go ahead, I'll just watch something on your TV." Jane replied, making her way to the sofa. Katherine approached her, taking a seat beside her. "How was the bath Katherine?"

"Relaxing, I heard you two talking with each other. I'm glad that both of you are trying to bury the hatchet." Katherine commented, drying her hair with the towel draped over her shoulders. Jane made a sound to acknowledge Katherine's comment, idly switching channels until she chose to settle for the documentary channel. "Are you not gonna call whoever you want to call?"

"They're all too busy with their lives or Christmas Eve to pick up my calls."

"They may surprise you." Jane said nothing for a moment, and slowly took her phone out from her pocket. She stared at her device, unsure who to call. "Are you close to anyone in your family?"

"I do talk to Henry and Tommy from time to time. John… well, once in a while. I'm not especially close to any of my sisters, but Dorothy did like to hang around me."

"If you could call one of your siblings, who would it be?" Katherine knew that she was most likely overstepping, but she sensed that Jane wanted to at least wish someone from her family Merry Christmas. Jane let out a huge sigh, she didn't know who to call since she didn't consider herself close to any of her siblings.

"... I suppose Dorothy, she was devastated when I left for London."

"Then why not call her? I'm sure she'll be chuffed to hear you." Katherine didn't like to overstep when it came to family matters, but she knew that Jane's situation was different from hers. She wanted to see the gentle woman happy, and if that meant overstepping boundaries, then so be it. "Please trust me on this."

"... Alright, I doubt she's going to pick up though." Jane relented, dialling her youngest sister's number. It took less than a minute for the call to connect, and Jane was surprised that her sister accepted the call. "Dorothy? It's me, how are you doing?"

_"Jane! You… actually called. Did something happen?"_

"No, I just wanted to wish you Merry Christmas. That's all." Katherine coughed, giving her friend a pointed look. Jane replied by gesturing in mild panic, she didn't know what to say to a sibling she hadn't contacted in four years. "Um… Who's back for Christmas?"

 _"Everyone except you and John. Why didn't you come back?"_ Jane could hear that her sister wanted her back, and was about to cry. Jane didn't know how to phrase her response delicately, and could only hope that Dorothy wouldn't hate her as much as she predicted. _"... Is it Henry? Tommy mentioned that-"_

"I broke up with him years ago, and I was told that there wasn't enough room for me back home."

_"... We've always been a large family, you could have at least given me a better excuse."_

"That's what our parents said to me every year, besides I'm celebrating Christmas with some friends." Jane unconsciously reached out for Katherine's hand, who squeezed back in support. She only realised that she had reached out for Katherine's hand after the squeeze from the younger woman, her grey eyes flitting to Katherine's with surprise.

_"Tommy never said that you made friends in London. Wait, is this a code word for a new boyfriend?!"_

"N-No! They're all female! I… do you want to talk to one of them?" Katherine raised up her hands to silently protest, but Jane had shoved her phone into said hands. "Please take this, I… I don't know how to continue."

"Hi! I'm Katherine, your sister's friend from uni!" Katherine was reluctant to speak in place of Jane, but it was better than leaving Dorothy hanging. Jane wildly gestured for the first-year to keep the conversation alive, the latter sighing heavily in response.

 _"... This better not be Jane's way of saying she has a girlfriend but is afraid that I'll be homophobic…"_ Katherine frowned, why did Dorothy assume that Jane's friends equated to having a lover? Did she not have friends back in Salisbury? _"... Is she happy?"_

"I would say so, I only met her recently."

_"Okay well… I care a great deal for her, and I'll smash your face in if you broke her heart."_

"I'm... sure you will." Katherine handed the phone back to Jane, who refused. "Take the damn phone and talk to your sister!"

 _"Look, it's okay for you to be gay. You don't need to hide it, the Lord and I will always love you. Anyways, Marge is calling for me. Merry Christmas."_ Jane blinked, unable to understand Dorothy's parting words. She stared at Katherine, who looked equally confused.

"So… your sister thinks we're a thing?"

"I'm terribly sorry, I don't know what gave her that impression. I clearly told her that I just have friends." Jane apologised, she truly didn't know why Dorothy would assume as such. Katherine smiled back in response, she didn't blame the younger Seymour. It was natural to jump to wild conclusions considering that they hadn't seen each other since Jane left for university. "Does Anne usually take long baths?"

"Either that, or she's masturbating."

"... I'm going to block that image out of my mind while we watch whatever's on TV." Jane mumbled as she turned her attention back to the television, instantly covering her eyes with her hands upon seeing a documentary of two lions mating. "This is cruel irony."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> 1\. Are science-based subjects and Maths actually better than the humanities? Why do some people believe this way and are current efforts to encourage people to think otherwise helping?
> 
> 2\. Why do you think people tend to assume that having a friend that is of the opposite gender equates to being your partner in romantic relationships?
> 
> 3\. Why do some women have an unhealthy obsession with regards to their cup sizes in relation to others? 
> 
> 4\. Jane mentioned to Dorothy that their parents had told her they weren't able to accommodate Jane on Christmas. Why do you think this is so given that the Seymours are a large family? What does this say about the relationship between Jane and her parents based on what was mentioned in previous chapters?


	8. Chapter 8

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> As mentioned in Chapter 1, Jane, Anne and Katherine are all related to each other in this story and there might be questions at the end of each questions for you to think/reflect on. Basically similar to Literature books.

"So, did you find out Jane's cup size?" Anna whispered to Anne, who shook her head regretfully. They were now at Jane's house to celebrate Christmas, with the entire living room decorated with Christmas decorations. Jane had excused herself, saying that she needed to finish up the present for the exchange held during the later part of the day. "Verdammt, we were up all night arguing 'bout it."

"Well, no news on cup sizes but she had a nice heart-to-heart talk with Kitty last night."

"Bo, try this pie I made yesterday." Catalina sauntered up to them, holding two plates with a pie slice each and offering it to the two women. Anne smirked as she poked her finger into the pie's crust, dipping it into the mix inside and licking her finger afterwards. "You could've just asked for a fork."

"Now where's the fun in that?" Anna chuckled at the exchange, leaving them alone and approaching Catherine and Katherine, who were both by the windows examining Jane's plant. "Thank god Janey was nearby yesterday, did you know that she held her own against Mary?"

"Impressive, goes to show that people shouldn't underestimate a meek face."

"Mmhm, and I've heard some snippets of her conversation with Kitty last night. Rather enlightening in my opinion."

"Leave the poor dear alone, she's innocent."

"I know, I simply find it interesting that for someone who seems to be a family-oriented woman, she's not quite as such." Anne shrugged, dipping her finger into the pie slice a second time. Catalina rolled her eyes, cursing her luck for forgetting to grab a fork for Anne. "She has a policy of not poking her nose into private affairs."

"Yes, something that you lack."

"I don't know, seems a bit dodgy to me. Respecting the privacy's good and all, but to not even show the slightest curiosity towards it? Clearly something's up."

"Or maybe Jane _is_ interested but doesn't show it on her face."

"Maybe. Anyways, she's pretty close to Kitty as of late. Observed how she repeatedly glanced to where Kitty was when asked her 'bout something personal."

"And why are you telling me this?"

"Well, I was hoping to ask if she told you anything 'bout her siblings? You don't have to get into specifics, a simple yes or no will suffice." Catalina sighed, Anne could be too nosy for her own good. All she could do was to place trust in the third-year and hope that Jane wouldn't be blackmailed.

"She's the seventh of ten children, oldest daughter. Told me all her siblings' names, but never mentioned who she's the closest to."

"Ooh, what are the names?"

"There's Johnson, nicknamed John. He's the oldest, a cop around this area I think? Then there's Edward, Henry, Thomas-"

"That's Catherine's ex right?"

"Yep, same bloke. Where was I? Oh right, Jane calls him Tommy. Afterwards should be Johnathan, Anthony, Jane, Margery, Elizabeth and finally Dorothy. I'm pretty sure she told me their ages, but there's too many for me to remember."

"That's all?"

"Yeah, she doesn't talk about her family much. Hell, I haven't seen a picture of her family at all." Catalina shrugged, she did question Jane about it when she was first invited over to her house but Jane merely brushed it off by saying that getting everyone to stay still for a family picture was too much of a hassle, as such they didn't bother. "She's from Salisbury. Wiltshire area if you didn't know."

"All I care about is that it sounds like that steak Henry liked for dinner back when we were still a thing."

"It's delicious though, the steak that is." Catalina replied, glancing briefly at the rest who were present in the living room. Her eyes widened as she saw what was happening, exclaiming to stop them from what they were doing. "Hey! No! Stop that! Leave Leafy alone!"

"I'm just pouring coffee for Leafy to drink." Catherine mumbled, holding a mug filled with steaming hot coffee. Catalina pinched the bridge of her nose, to think she trusted Catherine enough to leave her alone with Jane's pet cactus. "Besides, maybe they'll become stronger and spinier?"

"No! Jane explicitly told us to not water Leafy! Anyways, she watered it two days ago!"

"This is a cactus, they'll survive some coffee."

"Precisely because it's a damn cactus that's why we shouldn't be giving it liquids regularly!"

"Cathy said that cacti love freshly brewed coffee! We thought it'll make Leafy happy!" Katherine beamed, unaware that Catherine had the tendency to kill even the hardiest of plants. Anna nodded, going as far as to present Catalina with an online article about watering plants with coffee. "Leafy looks thirsty!"

"Is this another group activity? If so, I'm all for murdering Janey's plant."

"Bo, don't you bring your chaotic self into this!" Catherine, Catalina and Anne ended up arguing, not noticing that Jane was watching the whole scene unfold before her very eyes. Katherine pried the mug from Catherine's hand, and was about to pour coffee into Leafy's pot. "Kat, no!"

"Maybe save the treat for next time." Jane remarked, startling all five of them. How long had she been there, they all thought. Jane made her way towards Katherine and gently took the mug away from her, afterwards she chugged down the contents in one shot. "Dear lord, consider adding some sugar into your brew next time."

"What's the point of drinking coffee if not to take it at its most bitter?"

"... I'm going to get a terrible stomachache from this." Was all Jane mumbled as she made her way to the sink in the kitchen, with plans to wash the mug. They all stared at each other, speechless at how calm Jane was despite being aware that Catherine tried to kill Leafy.

"Does this mean that coffee _can_ be used to water plants?"

"From now on Catherine, you're not allowed near Leafy."

* * *

"Hey girls, I looked up a bonding game we can play! The best part is that it _doesn't_ involve any alcohol!" Anna grinned as she waved her phone in the air, with Katherine cheering at the discovery. Anne? Not so much. "It's 'Two Truths and A Lie'! It sounds like a rad party game!"

"I love how Anna has such low standards for fun games until it's time for dinner." Catherine commented, giving Jane a knowing look. Jane sighed, thanks to Catalina, everyone knew of her low tolerance towards alcohol. "By the way Seymour, your brother messaged me yesterday."

"You? What about?"

"Oh, he asked me if it's true that you made friends here. I told him yes. Does he not know about us?" Catherine gestured to herself and Catalina, who was trying to push Anne off her lap as they prepared to play the game Anna had suggested and was eager to play. Jane shrugged, she wasn't sure herself. "He wished you a Merry Christmas by the way."

"He could've just messaged me himself." Jane said as she sat on the floor with Catherine and Anna beside her, she hoped that one of her roommates cleaned the floor last night. Anna explained the rules, though everyone knew them since the name told them everything they needed to know. They indulged Anna nonetheless, she looked too happy for them to tell the truth. "Anna, why don't you go first?"

"Okay! This is just like all the overnight camps back in school but on Christmas! Hmm… I'm an Austen convert, my favourite colour's red, and I've recently taken to trolling people on Omegle."

"... They all sound possible, I don't know which one's the lie here…" Catalina remarked, glancing briefly at Catherine. They all thought long and hard, Anna said it with such confidence that none of them knew which one was the lie. Eventually, they gave up and decided to wing it. "I'm going with the Omegle trolling."

"Austen convert for me." Katherine said, with Jane and Anne nodding with agreement. That left Catherine, who was torn between choosing the first and last options.

"... I'll just support Aragón for this round."

"And the answer is… the Austen convert! I mean, I'm not _that_ into Victorian literature like Cathy here." Anna revealed, with Catherine mumbling that there wasn't much fun in trolling people on Omegle. "C'mon Cathy, they're all horny teens who wanna get off! What better way to pass the time than to troll 'em?"

"You're a chaotic bitch and I love you for it." Anne grinned, shooting Anna fingerguns to show her approval. Jane sighed, deciding to let the topic slide. Who was she to criticise someone else's hobby anyways? "My turn right? This is a tough one, everyone knows everything 'bout me."

"You can always surprise us!"

"Kitty, you know everything. Anyways, I got a few nice ones. So… I own a collar, I vibe with green, and I use Kitty's razor to shave myself."

"Gross! That better be the lie here!" Katherine yelped, she didn't want to imagine her cousin using her personal razor to shave her unwanted hair, especially since she was privy to the knowledge that most of her unwanted hair was only seen by her paramours. The rest shuddered, sympathising with Katherine for the horrifying possibility.

"As much as I wanna side with Kat, I gotta go with the collar."

"Yes, I don't think Boleyn's kinky enough to own a collar."

"By process of elimination, I'll say that Bo using Kat's razor is the lie here."

"What does 'vibe' mean?" Jane asked, that was the most perplexing thing among all of the things she had heard. The rest sighed, only Katherine was kind enough to provide her an explanation.

"It's kinda like something you relate to."

"But… how can she relate to a _colour_?!"

"Seymour, just roll with it."

"... Razor then?" Jane was still confused, and decided to look up the term on her phone later. Anne simply smiled, observing the expressions of her friends as she withheld the answer.

"I don't use Kitty's razor to shave." Said cousin sighed with relief, if it was true, she would have to burn the tool before throwing it away. The rest all sighed, their faith in Anne restored. "I use Anna's."

"Girl, what the fuck?! Can't you go for waxing like normal people?!"

"Sorry, your razor looks so shiny and not about to give me a disease."

"Hold up, you _actually_ have a collar?" Catherine asked, unable to believe that Anne actually owned one. Anne nodded, jerking a thumb in Catalina's direction, who covered her face out of embarrassment. "What does she have to do with it?"

"She gave me a collar before I bought my choker. It even has a metal tag with my name on it."

"... Wow, you made Anne your bitch huh?" Catalina let out an ungodly screech of embarrassment, it was the only thing she had after her dog died the same time Anne had gotten her scar. It wasn't her fault that the dog shared the same name with the woman. "At least we know who tops now."

"We're both switches Anna, and now I regret saying it." Catalina groaned, trust Anne to embarrass her in front of their friends. "I used to use a hair straightener, I dated Henry's older brother before, and I accidentally kicked a puppy before."

"Definitely the puppy. How can anyone kick puppies?" Katherine asked, even though she knew that Henry wouldn't hesitate. The rest nodded, despite having suspicions towards the other options.

"It wasn't a puppy I kicked, it was Kat."

"Like… a feline or Howard?"

"The human." Katherine gasped, glaring at Catalina accusingly. The poor fourth-year raised her hands up and explained that it was an accident, but Anne was out for blood. "It was an accident! You were in the lecture hall and I didn't see you there so I just kicked you by accident!"

"How are you able to 'accidentally' kick a woman standing at 1.7 metres?!"

"She was underneath the chairs, and my leg just… you know what, I'm so glad she doesn't know until today."

"I'm more interested to know how you ended up underneath the chairs in a lecture hall." Jane murmured, barely audible and went unheard by everyone except Catherine. Katherine crossed her arms, annoyed that she was kicked in her sleep without realising it. "Are we going to continue playing party games or will we be doing something else?"

"Any suggestions Jane?"

"Winx Club on Netflix?" The rest groaned, even Katherine. Catherine groaned the loudest, the last thing she wanted to watch was a film featuring teenage females with impossibly thin body frames. Not to mention their need to have boyfriends, why couldn't the main characters simply be friends with their male counterparts? "Too feminine?"

"You know what Anna? Go and search for more games we can play until dinner." Anne begged, she didn't want to watch a fantasy movie for primary school girls. The rest nodded eagerly, only Jane was against it but she wasn't going to protest if she was up against a clear majority. "Kitty, your turn. Anything to purge the thought of plastic fairies with weird powers outta my head."

"Okay! I vibe with pink, I've skipped my Saturday meetings once, and I keep a diary!" Katherine smiled, with two of her friends staring at each other with confusion in their eyes. "I was about to say that I have a tattoo but I'm not sure if that's a lie or not since I have more than one!"

"For your sake, I hope playing hooky is a lie." Catalina commented, with Anne and Anna agreeing. Jane and Catherine didn't know why they would hope that being truant would be Katherine's lie, skipping a social event seemed harmless to them. "You know you're not supposed to skip them!"

"That's because skiving off meetings is the lie here! Though I wish you gave it more thought…"

"Give us more challenging options then, like Anna. They all sounded like things she would do." Anne replied, snapping her fingers in Catherine's direction. "Catherine, your turn."

"I once dyed my hair blue in secondary school, I've written fan fiction, and I've dabbed in front of my family before."

"See Kat, these are the kind of options we wanna hear during this game." Anna remarked, with Katherine nodding while doing her best to eliminate the truths from the lie. They all sounded possible, given that Catherine gave off a rebellious writer aura. "I'm gonna go with the hair dye part, you probably dyed it after graduation but before uni."

"I'll go with that too, I'm pretty sure you would dab in front of your family as a symbol for something…" Catalina was fairly sure that she had come across her roommate's fan fiction, mostly a more feminist approach to how her favourite stories should be written. Catalina recalled that Catherine liked to include the tender hand-holding trope in works that had romance as the main genre, with fateful meetings as her second favourite trope. Katherine and Anne voted for hair dye and fan fiction respectively, with Jane being the only one who felt that dabbing was the lie. "What's the lie here?"

"Dabbing. I dabbed in front of the whole school when I was 16, and I said yeet to my family after the principal called them in." Catherine shrugged, not regretting her actions. She did them to highlight that English was becoming more complicated with modern influences, and that sometimes words didn't need to have clear definitions as it was a representation of the ambiguity in languages. "I'm actually a troublemaker back then, but my grades are good so… yeah."

"What's dabbing?" Jane asked, she was hesitant to admit that she was behind times but she really wanted to know what dabbing was. Catherine stared at her without any emotion for a good 30 seconds, and abruptly dabbed for her to see. Anna and Anne cheered, while Catalina scolded her for almost poking someone's eye. "... Oh."

"Your turn." Jane blinked, raising up her hands and tried to position them the way Catherine did. They all laughed, Jane's attempt to dab failed hilariously and was kind of adorable to see her flustered. "I meant the game! Did anyone take a picture of Seymour's dab fail?"

"O-Oh. I thought… never mind." Jane's face was flushed with embarrassment, and she lowered her hands down shortly after. Everyone laughed, save for Katherine. She did laugh at first, but felt that she was being mean by laughing at her misfortune. She certainly didn't want Jane to laugh at her when she was humiliated in front of others. "I… I have an addiction, I used to get injured a lot in secondary school, and I've once cheated on a test."

"Girl, everyone knows that you're addicted to tea. I can't imagine you cheating though, and you don't look like the clumsy type to me." Catherine commented, with almost everyone nodding in agreement. Katherine said nothing, she was worried that Jane was trying to tell them something dark about her life before London.

"Well, have fun discussing while I check on the dishes. I better not see a bite mark or two." Jane got up and made her way to the kitchen, leaving her friends in the living room to discuss their answers. Truthfully, Jane felt that she wasn't able to keep her usual gentle smile up any longer, and needed to hide until she gathered enough energy to smile once more. _'They didn't suspect a thing… right?'_

* * *

"Lina, you've outdone yourself! You really should take over next time, you girls don't need me to cook anymore!" Jane said to Catalina as they washed the dishes, while Catalina hummed in agreement. Katherine was in the dining room collecting the remaining plates while the other three argued over who got to wear the Santa hat for the rest of the day. "The Yorkshire pudding was the highlight of the dinner, I can see that your girlfriend liked it."

"Girlfr- no! Bo's not my girlfriend! She's my… something?" Catalina hastily corrected Jane, her ears tinged red as Jane chuckled. "Sheesh, since when you're one to tease others?"

"All in good fun on Christmas." Jane replied, her grey eyes lighting up as Katherine entered the kitchen with a small stack of plates. "Katherine, thank you for helping us!"

"It's no trouble! Oh by the way Catalina, I think Cathy and Anne are trying to put the Santa hat on Leafy! Do you think you can snap a shot with Anna inside?"

"What?! I banned Catherine from going near Leafy!" Catalina stormed out of the kitchen, yelling swear words that were no way becoming of someone who prided herself as a calm individual. Katherine and Jane couldn't help giggling as grunting sounds were heard, most likely Catalina attempting to wrestle the hat away from the English major. "You putas better be leaving that cactus alone!"

"Are the presents all ready?"

"Yep, they're all in the bag!" Katherine made her way to the sink and grabbed a plate from her stack, washing alongside the unusually stony-faced woman. "... Are you okay?"

"What? Oh, yes. I was just thinking about how none of you wanted to watch Winx Club earlier on." Katherine frowned, she knew when her friends were lying and Jane was no exception. Unfortunately for her, that didn't help her when it came to men. "Fine, it was the game we had earlier."

"You don't like it when others are laughing at you."

"... I'm used to it." Jane admitted, reaching out for another plate and placing it under the running water. They washed in silence for a few minutes, soon settling into a comfortable pattern until Jane spoke up again. "I never cheated before, that's the lie."

"You actually have an addiction?"

"Nothing serious, I just like the slushed ice they sell at 7-Eleven. It numbs me."

"... Have you considered therapy for whatever you have?"

"Wouldn't that mean that I'm admitting that there's something wrong with me?" Jane asked, continuing only when Katherine didn't give her a reply immediately after. "I'm considered the perfect girl in university, people think there's nothing wrong with me and honestly? There really isn't anything wrong with me, I just have my off days."

"You wouldn't be having a slushie addiction if you only have off days once in a while though."

"I just don't feel like my usual self once in a while, and slushed ice helps bring that Jane back." Katherine stopped washing, eyeing Jane with sincere concern. Jane didn't meet Katherine's eyes, she couldn't bear to. "I have a reputation to uphold Katherine."

"I've been attending therapy sessions on Saturdays." Katherine blurted out, grabbing Jane's attention. She wasn't planning on sharing such private information to the older woman, but she knew that Jane wouldn't benefit if she continued the path she was on. "Sometimes I attend them, sometimes I skip, and on the days that I do skip, I start to go haywire. Not saying that you definitely should go to therapy, it's ultimately a you thing. But… it gives you a chance to take control of your own life."

"I… Are you sure you want me to know about this?"

"Yes, I'm ashamed that I need therapy. But no, I don't regret telling you about this. I want you to know that there are people out there who have trauma or mental issues and that it's a thing to admit that you need someone to help you through them." Katherine felt her voice wavering, this was the first time she was being so open with someone that wasn't her therapist. Not even Anne knew about it, though her cousin could easily guess what Katherine felt about therapy, she was bad at hiding her emotions. "Look, we haven't known each other long enough to be considered best friends… but I'm there for you, even if you decide that you're right as rain."

"... Help me open the packet of marshmallows I left in the fridge." Was all Jane said as she started to prepare hot chocolate for the six of them. Sensing that the conversation was over, Katherine obliged and offered to help prepare the hot chocolate. "It's alright dear, could you also help me bring out the toffee cheesecake Lina made?"

"Sure." Katherine replied, her fingers accidentally brushing against Jane's right thigh. The latter immediately slapped Katherine's hand away, realising seconds later what she had done. "S-Sorry."

"No, that was my fault. I'm not used to people… touching me there." They both avoided each others' gazes to the best of their ability, busying themselves in the kitchen until Anne popped in to sneak a bite of whatever was available. "Anne, since you're here, could you bring out the cheesecake over there?"

"Do I get to take a bite out of it?"

"You most certainly can't. Run along now." Anne grumbled, reluctantly bringing the cheesecake out to the living room where Anna was cheering Catherine on. Catalina let out a cry of anger, a crash following shortly after. "This has been an eventful Christmas."

"Y'know, I have an idea but my cousin won't be all for it."

"Oh? Do share."

"The idea is to get her together with Lin-Lin, it's actually obvious that they fancy each other but I don't get why are they so damn clueless!" Jane nodded, she wasn't against the idea. She saw that Catalina had genuine feelings for Anne, even though she was either in denial or simply oblivious towards her 'complicated' relationship with Anne. "And while I'm at it, let's get Cathy and Anna together!"

"Them? Don't you think it's a bit hasty for them to enter a relationship?"

"They're both saps when it comes to romance, and they have similar opinions towards stuff!"

"... Well, Anna certainly is a far cry from Tommy. Cathy does seem to express interest in Anna too… alright, as long as you don't take it too far, I'll assist you." Jane relented, she did want to see both her roommates happy. They were both in troubled relationships in the past, and her friends proved to be better romantic partners than her brother or god forbid, Henry. "Katherine."

"Yeah?" Jane steadied her trembling hand, to her, Katherine was a hammer that tried to break down her defences which weren't noticeable to most. There was something about the younger girl's nature that lowered her carefully maintained defences, and Jane wasn't sure if that was a good or bad thing.

"... Sorry, I forgot what I wanted to say." Jane sighed, she still wasn't ready to tell Katherine all about herself. She didn't think her junior would mind, she had been keeping her personal life to herself too, except Jane was sure that Katherine's was much worse. "Shall we get the hot chocolate to them before the marshmallows melt?"

"Oh right, I forgot to dump the marshies in!"

* * *

"You know what we should do? We should play a song while we collect our gifts from this sad sack." Anne suggested while gesturing to the knitted bag in front of them. The rest shrugged, they didn't see what could go wrong if they allowed Anne to play some songs while they collected their random gifts. "Okay so… 'Wearing Yellow To A Funeral' or my intro song?"

"Bitch, you just want a reason to make yourself the main star." Catalina sighed as she pulled a present wrapped in red wrapping paper out from the bag, admiring how the gifter stuck a silver bow on top. "Ooh, this looks promising."

"Okay fine, how 'bout we swap stories starring the one arsehole in our lives?" Anne asked, pulling out a present wrapped in dark blue wrapping paper. There were many observable creases on the paper, hinting that the gifter wasn't good at wrapping presents. Everyone agreed to Anne's new suggestion, and said woman was the one who got the ball rolling. "Hmm… Got one. So, Henry once gave me a birthday gift which ended up being a stick of deodorant."

"No offence Boleyn, but that sounds practical for him."

"It wasn't my birthday though. Shoved that stick in his mouth afterwards." Anne gestured wildly, nearly hitting Jane's face in the process. The rest winced, they didn't like Henry but neither did they want to imagine being force-fed deodorant. "That arse went to the hospital afterwards, serves him right."

"In my case, he accused me of cheating on him with his brother. He wanted to break up with me because I allegedly had sex with Arthur. Like hello?! I dated Arthur for less than a week before breaking up with that sad sack!" Catalina went next, even going as far as to show her finger at her friends. Anne placed a comforting hand on her friend's shoulder, she could relate with slander from Henry. "He's the one that cheated on me with three women! Anyways, I broke up with him because there's _no way_ I'm letting him get the satisfaction of breaking up with me!"

"I pity the first girl, what was her name again?"

"Elizabeth Blount, she's classmates with Jane."

"Oof, awkward much?" Jane made a noise to agree, it was indeed awkward knowing that she was classmates with one of Henry's fling. In fact, she felt that it was weird that she was friends with Henry's exes. "Have we collected the gifts?"

"Yes. Speaking of Henry, he threatened to induce an abortion should I ever get pregnant with his child." Jane casually commented as she unwrapped her gift, which was a rose gold bracelet. Anna and Catherine knitted their eyebrows with concern at the casual comment, and was even more concerned when the other three women didn't show any signs of worry at Jane's remark. "Oh my, this is lovely! Whose gift does this belong to?"

"Me! I wasn't sure what I should get, so I got something that even Anna would be okay with!" Katherine was thrilled that Jane was her recipient, she was hoping that it would be her even though she didn't mind if her gift ended up in someone else's hands. She started to unwrap her gift, fumbling as the ribbon securing it was tied tightly. "Henry hit me a lot, but that's something all of us relate to right?"

"Um, not for me." Catherine sheepishly mumbled as Katherine finally untied the ribbon, allowing her to unwrap her gift. It was a shiny silver vacuum flask, and Katherine stared at it with wonder. "I got that as... well… in case you want to keep something hot or cold it's handy and-"

"It's wunderbar! I can keep my soda chilled _and_ use this to bash someone!"

"Good for you girl, now lemme see what I got…" Anna tore open her gift, wrapping paper flying above their heads and landing in their hot chocolate. Eventually, she was left with a stuffed bear that had a red ribbon tied around its neck. "Awwww! I'm gonna name you Honey!"

"Thank god she likes it." Anne whispered to Catalina, who smiled in approval. Anne scowled back, not wanting her friend to make a big thing out of it. "So Cat, what's yours?"

"I wonder…" Catalina had a feeling that she was holding onto Anna's gift by process of elimination. She knew that Catherine had her gift, which left either Anna's or Jane's. She assumed it was Anna's due to the latter's fondness for red, and she knew that there wasn't any red wrapping paper in Jane's house. She unwrapped her gift, which turned out to be a notebook with stars decorated on the cover page. "Anna, is this yours?"

"Yep! I'm not sure what any of you really wanted, so I went for the practical route." Anna rubbed the back of her head bashfully, with Catalina grinning at the ways she could put her gift to use. That left Catherine and Anne who hadn't opened their gifts. "What about you Cathy? Whose gift is it?"

"No idea, though it'll be nice if it's a bag of coffee…" Catherine unwrapped her gift, which turned out to be a laminated bookmark that had a flower pressed on it. "... So I can't murder Leafy but you can murder another plant?"

"That gift's from me, and yes I can murder plants because I'm a responsible person." Catherine smirked at Catalina's comment, she was touched that she received such a personal bookmark from one of her friends. That left Anne with Jane's gift, the gifter being noticeably uncomfortable for unknown reasons. "So Anne, what did you get?"

"Whoa, this looks handmade." Anne unwrapped her gift to reveal a knitted scarf, impressed at its quality. Jane looked away, fully prepared for Anne to declare that she hated it. "I won't lie, I'm not a fan of scarves. But I think this'll come in handy when the weather's freezing, so thanks Janey."

"I'm surprised that you're pretty shitty at wrapping stuff." Anna commented, she had noticed that the gift wasn't well wrapped. Jane mumbled some apologies, she wasn't going to admit that she had little time to wrap her gift properly thanks to being banned from returning home last night. "Okay! Who wants to play another round of party games?!"

"Welp, this is how I die folks."

"Don't be dramatic Bo, besides we do have emergency alcohol in case tonight goes pear-shaped."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> 1\. Is it possible to not completely bother with the affairs of others? How do people draw the line between respecting boundaries and being apathetic?
> 
> 2\. What can be said about Jane's relationship with Thomas (her brother) given that he messaged Catherine (his ex) to wish Jane a Merry Christmas instead of the sister herself?
> 
> 3\. Omegle trolling is best described as upsetting users who seek out sexual gratification on the platform. How is Omegle trolling dangerous and what are some of the ways to practice online safety on any social platform?
> 
> 4\. Should Anne even have used her roommate's razor? Is it safe for her to assume that by using Anna's razor, she is safe from transmissible diseases? 
> 
> 5\. The rest supports Catherine's fan fiction. Is this commonly observed in real life? Why or why not?
> 
> 6\. What do you think about Jane saying that by admitting that she needs therapy (or any kind of help), there's something wrong with her and therefore marring her 'perfect girl' image?


	9. Chapter 9

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> As mentioned in Chapter 1, Jane, Anne and Katherine are all related to each other in this story and there might be questions at the end of each questions for you to think/reflect on. Basically similar to Literature books.

**[make araleyn a thing!!!]**

_**[9.02 AM]** _

**katsitter added J.S. into the group.**

**katsitter added Regrets &Coffee into the group.**

**katsitter added KweenCleves into the group.**

**katsitter:** we need to make araleyn a thing

 **KweenCleves:** gurl its 9am

 **KweenCleves:** its too early for this shit

 **J.S.:** Oh hush, you're just nursing a hangover.

 **Regrets &Coffee: **I'm concerned that Seymour's okay with getting those two idiots together.

 **katsitter:** i made her join this cult last nite

 **J.S.:** … A cult?

 **KweenCleves:** chill its just a term to mean grp

 **KweenCleves:** but in a cool way ofc

 **J.S.:** Oh! Modern slang is interesting, I didn't know cults carry that meaning.

 **Regrets &Coffee: **Seymour, you're barely older than us.

 **KweenCleves:** sksksksks janes boomer confirmed

 **J.S.:** Anyways Katherine, I'm all for getting them together but please be reasonable.

 **Regrets &Coffee: **Should've played Seven Minutes in Heaven last night…

 **katsitter:** yea i dun want 7h of sex in a room

 **KweenCleves:** ok fair tbh

 **KweenCleves:** how shld we get em tgt

 **Regrets &Coffee: **Either we make them realise that they like each other, or we wait for 35 years before they realise but by then they're already married to others.

 **katsitter:** remains of the day?

 **Regrets &Coffee: **It's a classic.

 **J.S.:** Unfortunately we don't have 35 years for them to realise their feelings.

 **J.S.:** Lina and I are graduating this year too.

 **KweenCleves:** r u moving away???

 **J.S.:** I meant that Lina would be focused on getting a job after graduation, which means less time to realise her feelings for Anne.

 **katsitter:** ok lets just lock em in a room aft our plans to normally get them tgt fails

 **Regrets &Coffee: **There'll be so much pining involved, sign me up.

 **KweenCleves:** yasssss this is gonna be so lit n they wont kno wht hit em

 **katsitter:** yayyyy

* * *

**[blue n red]**

_**[9.39 AM]** _

**katsitter added that boleyn girl into the group.**

**katsitter added Mentally Dead into the group.**

**katsitter added J.S. into the group.**

**that boleyn girl:** fuck yes

 **J.S.:** You don't even know what's happening?

 **Mentally Dead:** Kat wants us to help her to get Catherine and Anna together

 **J.S.:** How did you know?!

 **Mentally Dead:** Please, you're the only one among us that insists on spending years to get to know each other before making a damn move

 **that boleyn girl:** live in the moment janey

 **katsitter:** wow tht didnt take any convisnidsu

 **Mentally Dead:** Honestly those two should be fine on their own, we just need to give them some nudges

 **that boleyn girl:** like locking them in a rm

 **J.S.:** Or we gently encourage them to spend more time together without us?

 **that boleyn girl:** did tht help u land any guys??

 **J.S.:** … We leave them in a secluded part of the library?

 **that boleyn girl:** much better

 **katsitter:** yay everyones on board

 **Mentally Dead:** How did you convince Jane anyways?

 **katsitter:** i asked her last nite n i begged her

 **J.S.:** On the condition that we don't take things too far.

 **Mentally Dead:** Oh honey, there's no such thing as 'too far' in this household

* * *

**[protect the babies squad]**

_**[10.00 AM]** _

**KweenCleves added that boleyn girl into the group.**

**KweenCleves added Mentally Dead into the group.**

**KweenCleves added Regrets &Coffee into the group.**

**KweenCleves:** alrite we need a game plan

 **Mentally Dead:** I don't think Jane is romantically interested in women…

 **Regrets &Coffee: **Normally I'll say that we shouldn't speculate on one's sexuality, but in this case, Seymour's gay as fuck.

 **that boleyn girl:** u sure ur gaydars working lol

 **KweenCleves:** shes def gay

 **KweenCleves:** or bi

 **KweenCleves:** or pan

 **KweenCleves:** fuck she likes girls

 **Mentally Dead:** Very eloquent…

 **Mentally Dead:** Bo, are you okay with Kat being involved?

 **that boleyn girl:** ngl imma throw hands with janey if she fucks ip

 **that boleyn girl:** but kitty opens up to her more than me

 **Mentally Dead:** Oh, that's a green flag if I've seen one

 **that boleyn girl:** n her intirtion is gd with girls

 **KweenCleves:** yea but its men thts the prob here

 **Regrets &Coffee: **That doesn't mean that Howard's into Seymour though.

 **that boleyn girl:** trst mme when shes in love shes all vulnervaleble af arn tht one

 **KweenCleves:** tht wld mean tht she likes me

 **Mentally Dead:** Only because you happened to be there on most occasions

 **Regrets &Coffee: **I get the feeling that I should know the context but that's something for another day.

 **Regrets &Coffee: **Seymour's the problem here though, she thinks she's not into women.

 **Regrets &Coffee: **She thinks it's a fucking sin.

 **Mentally Dead:** Hence why we need to be gentle with her

 **KweenCleves:** kat too

 **KweenCleves:** they r so precious

 **that boleyn girl:** how r we gonna do it tho

 **Mentally Dead:** We plant seeds in Jane's head

 **Mentally Dead:** Or force her to watch lesbian movies

 **Regrets &Coffee: **How about I show her my fanfic about them?

 **Regrets &Coffee: **Lots of handholding in them.

 **Regrets &Coffee: **There's also them cuddling together after work.

 **Regrets &Coffee: **And pure baths with them combing each other's hair afterwards.

 **Regrets &Coffee: **There's even one about Seymour coming back home late and discovering that Howard was waiting for her on the sofa but fell asleep.

 **that boleyn girl:** how long hv u been shipping my cousinj with her????

 **Regrets &Coffee: **Since I told Seymour that Howard has her student ID.

 **Mentally Dead:** Girl, how many of those have you written?!

 **Regrets &Coffee: **37.

 **KweenCleves:** wow respect

 **that boleyn girl:** any smut

 **Regrets &Coffee: **No, I refuse to write adult fiction on those two.

 **Regrets &Coffee: **That goes against my morals.

 **that boleyn girl:** soooo who wld u write smut abt???

 **Regrets &Coffee: **Mainly you and Aragón.

 **Regrets &Coffee: **If you pay me, I would write one about you and Seymour.

 **that boleyn girl:** wtffffff

 **Mentally Dead:** Those two won't hate fuck, they'll just kill each other

 **Regrets &Coffee: **Enemies to lovers is a very popular trope in fandoms!

 **KweenCleves:** oh fuck janes calling us for breakfast

 **that boleyn girl:** quick pretend we r all sleeping

 **Mentally Dead:** You do that, I want breakfast

 **KweenCleves:** tbh same

 **Regrets &Coffee: **Wake me up when it's night time.

* * *

Jane was having second thoughts towards Katherine's plan to pair their friends together, it seemed like they were playing God in their relationships. That didn't stop her from following the younger girl towards the cafe Anna worked at, and for once, Anna wasn't on shift that day. They went to the table where Catalina and Anne were waiting, audibly arguing about which dessert was better.

"C'mon, play nice you two." Katherine warned as she took a seat opposite Anne, while Jane took the seat opposite Catalina. They grumbled, muttering about how they could be doing more important things but was cut off by Katherine. "You two don't have anything important apart from helping me get two lovebirds together."

"Don't you have classes?" Anne asked, having memorised her cousin's schedule. She wasn't in any position to call her out for skipping classes, but the last thing she wanted was for Katherine to think it was okay to skimp on education. Katherine shook her head, explaining that all her classes were cancelled for the day. "... Damn you're lucky."

"Anyways Lina, do you mind coming with me? I need your help in holding my coffee." Jane asked, standing up as she prepared to make her way towards the cashier. Catalina raised an eyebrow, why would Jane want to drink the cafe's coffee when everyone knew that she hated it? "I need a lot of horrible coffee, class was the worst."

"That bad huh? Okay, but take it easy on the shit water." Catalina got up to follow Jane, leaving Katherine alone with Anne. They were both pleased at the development, they were provided an opportunity to enact their plans.

"What's the deal between you and her now? Are you two just friends or…?"

"I've no idea really. Like, I _think_ we have something there but I really don't want to fuck things up. You know she holds grudges."

"So do you, but back to the main topic, have you two sat down and talked about the relationship?" Anne let out a heavy sigh, stuffing her mouth with the stale donut she bought for lunch. "Is that a yes?"

"I forgot that I didn't update you on the pillow talk we had on her birthday."

"Wait, _what_?!" Katherine was, needless to say, shocked upon hearing the news. Anne immediately pressed a finger to her cousin's lips, shuddering as she quickly realised that Katherine had applied lip gloss that day. "Sorry! Why didn't you tell me?!"

"I said I forgot, and well… I dunno? She's nice, and sincere, and puts up with my bullshit. I don't want to disappoint her y'know? I don't want her to think that I can fuck it up anymore because I'm pretty sure her opinion towards me is shit."

"And you're not just scared that she'll break your heart like what Henry did to you?"

"Henry did _not_ break my heart!"

"Okay fine! Just answer the damn question!"

"... I don't like being defenceless for everyone to see Kitty, you know that people will take advantage of me if I'm perceived as weak." Anne admitted, similar to what she had said to Catalina a while back. She crossed her arms, wincing as Jane groaned in pain in the background. "Enough 'bout me Kitty, let's talk about you."

"Me? What about me?"

"You've been getting along pretty well with Janey."

"Yeah, she's really nice. We do have common topics too, and it's fun being with her even if we don't do anything crazy."

Katherine had a soft smile on her face as she said that, just because most of their conversations were things that they would rather not share with acquaintances, didn't mean that Katherine didn't enjoy them. She loved how Jane was willing to share silvers of her personal life while putting Katherine above them, as much as she was worried that Jane's selflessness was actually a coping mechanism. She loved how Jane always knew what to say whenever she was feeling down, or at least not like her usual self. So she told her cousin about them, about how Jane was more complex than what she seemed and that it was fun learning small bits about her, good or bad.

"... That sounds like love." Anne commented, shaking her head slightly at her own observation. Katherine blinked, that wasn't the love she had always known. To her, it was mere friendship and nothing more. "She's definitely better than the rest."

"We're just friends though."

"Do you notice the little things Anna does for you?" Katherine shook her head, with Anne smirking at the answer. "There you go, you just appreciate what Anna does for you but you don't notice the little things involved."

"For starters, I'm romantically straight. Also, Jane's straight _and_ religious."

"Uh huh." Anne glanced over her shoulder, calling out to Jane, who was still complaining to Catalina about her classes. "Hey Janey! When was the last time you went to church?"

"...!" Jane gulped, sweating heavily at the question posed. She didn't want to admit that ever since she entered university, she had been missing church. It wasn't that she initially wanted to, it started as a day off to complete a thesis and just snowballed from there, eventually Jane decided to not attend at all. Seeing Jane's reaction, Anne smirked and turned her attention back to Katherine, who disapproved of her cousin's method.

"Anne Boleyn! Did you seriously just put Jane on the spot?!"

"Oh c'mon, it's pretty obvious. She's just comfortable with talking 'bout religion, doesn't mean she's been attending them all."

"Give me one good reason why I shouldn't pour this cup of coffee over your head." Jane was standing behind Anne, the cup tilting dangerously over her head. Catalina sighed, she had told Anne in confidence that Jane hadn't been attending church sessions for a while now.

"... You'll just make me sexier and Cat won't be able to resist me?"

"Don't underestimate me Bo."

* * *

"That went well!" Katherine cheerily said as she left the cafe with Jane, who was staggering behind. She had just consumed seven cups of coffee, and her stomach was now paying for it. She groaned, hoping that she wouldn't collapse and worry Katherine. The latter eventually stopped after noticing that Jane was lagging behind, worry present in her pink eyes as she jogged towards the blonde woman. "Jane! Are you okay?!"

"I'm… fine… just drank too much bad coffee…"

"Do you need painkillers? I have some on me in case… actually I don't have a reason but I do have some now!" Jane waved her hand, dismissing Katherine's offer. She was grateful for it though, even though her body was wracked with pain thanks to the coffee. "Do you need to lie down somewhere?"

"This reminds me... of the time Dorothy made... coffee for me and I got… food poisoning…"

"That's horrible! When was that?" Jane held up five fingers, indicating that it happened five years ago. "She made you coffee when she was five?!"

"It happened five years ago… Oh lord... this is where I'm going to die…. Katherine, please... bury me in Salisbury... and don't pour coffee on my grave…"

"Jane, you're exaggerating. You'll live, you're just gonna be in pain for a week or so."

"What's wrong with Seymour?" Catherine was on her way to her next class when she noticed Jane with a nauseous expression all over her face. She made her way towards them, a perplexed look on her face as she observed how Jane was twitching and about to keel over. "Oh wait, did she drink more than five cups of coffee at the cafe Anna works at?"

"Yeah, though I don't know how many cups… wait, this is normal?"

"Mmhm, I drank ten cups once. I started twitching and then my mind went into hyperdrive. I completed nine assignments in one sitting and got As for all of them." Catherine nodded, poking Jane's arm while the latter moaned in pain. "Yeesh, you have a delicate stomach."

"I'm… I'm fine… I have to be fine… I can't get sick…" Jane started to babble incoherently, the pain too much for her to bear. Catherine glanced at Katherine, who was understandably worried at the turn of events.

"Howard, take her right side. I'll take her left, and we're going to shove her into a taxi with you taking her home." She grunted as she tried to support Jane up, who was heavier than she expected. Katherine supported Jane's right side with ease, thanks to her regular workout sessions at the gym. They made their way out of campus, successfully flagging down a taxi that was still on the clock. Catherine pushed Jane into the vehicle, while Katherine sat in front. "I'm heading to my next class, take good care of her."

"Sure thing!" Katherine waved, providing the driver with instructions to Jane's house. The taxi drove off, leaving Catherine to stretch her back and text the rest of her friends about the situation.

**[protect the babies squad]**

_**[1.40 PM]** _

**Regrets &Coffee: **Someone tell me why did Seymour make herself sick with the coffee from Anna's cafe?

 **Mentally Dead:** She said that she wanted to bitch about her earlier classes

 **Mentally Dead:** Girl drank seven cups

 **that boleyn girl:** jfc no wonder shes sick af

 **KweenCleves:** wht abt kat? r they tgt??

 **Regrets &Coffee: **Howard's taking her back home, she's definitely in no condition to attend her remaining classes.

 **that boleyn girl:** she looked fine when she left

 **Regrets &Coffee: **She has a delicate stomach!

 **KweenCleves:** cathay ily n all but only u like the shit we sell here

 **Mentally Dead:** And only you are able to function better after drinking copious amounts of coffee, tainted or not

 **Regrets &Coffee: **Why did she even drink that many?! Her classes can't be that bad!

 **Regrets &Coffee: **She was so out of it that she spouted something about how she has to be fine!

 **that boleyn girl:** shit dun tell me she has a test ltr

 **Mentally Dead:** NO FUCKING WAY AM I TAKING A TEST FOR HER

 **Mentally Dead:** YOU'RE ALL MADDER THAN THE DAMN HATTER HIMSELF

 **Regrets &Coffee: **Calm the fuck down Aragón.

 **Mentally Dead:** I DON'T KNOW THE SHIT SHE'S LEARNING

 **KweenCleves:** gurl no ones asking u to be her

 **KweenCleves:** besides ur not pale enough to look like her

 **Regrets &Coffee: **Or blonde enough.

 **Regrets &Coffee: **Not that you were a blonde to begin with.

 **that boleyn girl:** or fat enough

 **Mentally Dead:** Not everyone's stick thin like Kat or you

 **KweenCleves:** jane looks way nicer to cyddle with than u two

 **that boleyn girl:** all sizes r gd to cuddle wtf r u saying

 **Regrets &Coffee: **Plus side is that we may have a development in their relationship, at the cost of Seymour's health.

 **that boleyn girl:** kitty was dense enough to tell me lots of things abt janey but not see thts love

 **that boleyn girl:** well healthier love at least

 **KweenCleves:** hhhhhhhhh cant belive u went there

 **Regrets &Coffee: **I have class until 5, Aragón?

 **Mentally Dead:** 1900

 **Regrets &Coffee: **Great, and we can't trust Boleyn, Anna or Howard to not burn Seymour's house down.

 **that boleyn girl:** does it hv to be homecooked food

 **that boleyn girl:** if its a fever she shld just drink cold drinks until she feels gd

 **KweenCleves:** anne shes abt to get diarroahods n periodlike cramps

 **KweenCleves:** we shlf be getting hot water bottles

 **that boleyn girl:** omg we need to tell kitty to boil a pot of watwr n pour it on janey

 **Mentally Dead:** NO YOU DO NOT DO THAT

 **Mentally Dead:** FOR THE LOVE OF EVERYTHING HOLY DON'T YOU DARE TELL KAT THAT

 **Regrets &Coffee: **I now realise that we're severely lacking in brain cells here.

 **KweenCleves:** so we tell kat to forget wht anne just send her??

 **Regrets &Coffee: **… Seymour needs more than one spiritual being to save her now...

* * *

"Jane, how are you feeling?" Thanks to Katherine's surprising amount of strength, she was able to support Jane all the way to her bedroom and carry her briefly before dropping her onto her bed. Jane groaned, she was still in pain and couldn't think clearly. "Where's your phone? I'll call you sister to ask if there's any particularly effective method!"

"... N-No. You can't let… my family know… that I get sick too…" Jane feebly replied, her grey eyes starting to water up from the pain. Katherine frowned, she couldn't cook anything for Jane since she would only burn food and she was confident that Anne's suggestion to pour boiling hot water onto Jane would just give her burns. "... Am I allowed… to eat painkillers now?"

"I have no idea, but I'll just give it to you anyways." Katherine took out painkillers from her purse and forced Jane to swallow them. She had a feeling that Jane probably had enough strength to at least consume the painkillers, but she didn't want to risk it. She wondered if painkillers had an expiry date, and whether giving a sick friend expired medicine was a good idea. "Feeling better?"

"Much, thank you..." Jane groaned, propping herself up weakly. Her vision was blurry, and she still felt pain in her abdominal area, but otherwise she was feeling way better as compared to a few moments ago. "I should've been less resistant to consuming medicine…"

"Is there a particular reason why?

"... My parents don't think that willingly consuming foreign substances will protect us…" Katherine gasped, realising what Jane meant by that. Jane panicked, hurrying to clarify the implication. "No! I went for vaccines, we all did! This only applies to pills!"

"Oh thank god, I wasn't sure whether I should call an ambulance and make the hospital inject you with every vaccine available." Katherine was noticeably relieved, and wanted Jane's phone for reasons she wouldn't immediately tell Jane. Thankfully, Jane assumed that Katherine's phone ran out of battery. "Thanks, I'll be back soon. Do you need some water? I could boil some."

"That would be lovely... I'm sorry that you have to care for me while I'm like this. Just... give me a few moments to rest and I'll be fine." Jane didn't like how she was effectively forced to stay in bed until the pain eased up. She made a mental note to include it to the list of reasons why coffee was bad for people and that Catherine should stop drinking it on a daily basis. Katherine left the bedroom soon after Jane had unlocked her phone for the former to use. Katherine made her way to the kitchen, dialling a certain number while boiling a kettle of water for Jane.

"Oh! You picked up!" Katherine's expression lit up as the call went through, though she sent nervous glances in the direction of Jane's bedroom. "Um so, Dorothy? Let's say one of your siblings fell ill, what do they do to recover?"

_"What does Jane do to help us recover? Hmm… she makes us chicken soup or porridge, and we'll hug something soft to sleep if it hurts. Why are you asking this- actually, who are you again?"_

"I'm Katherine, you misunderstood and said that I was Jane's girlfriend?"

_"Oh, the peppy girl. Why are you asking this anyways?"_

"Jane told me to not tell any of you this… but she's sick with a stomach ache and possibly something worse."

_"You're kidding, she never gets sick!"_

"She may have mentioned that she had gotten food poisoning from coffee you brewed five years ago."

 _"Jane didn't say anything about it back then… I always thought that she's invincible…"_ Katherine sighed, she knew that Jane gave off the impression that she was perfect back home, but for her sister to not notice that Jane actually fell sick at one point was on an entirely different level. _"Jane's still living at the house Dad bought for her right?"_

"Uh... I guess? So I should buy chicken soup or porridge from the store then?"

 _"You can just cook them for Jane, it's not that hard."_ Katherine scoffed, clearly Dorothy didn't know about her talent in burning anything edible. _"Oh for… don't tell me you can't cook!"_

"It's less about not knowing how to cook and more about burning stuff…"

 _"The train on Platform 3 bound for Victoria, London, will be departing shortly."_ Katherine blinked, did she just hear what she thought she heard? Is Dorothy actually coming to visit her sister? _"Just… just stay there and provide Jane with comfort or something, I don't know! None of us knew that Jane could even get sick! Go look up ways to make sick people feel better or maybe recite something from the Bible?! Are you Catholic or Protestant?"_

"Atheist actually, but I think Jane keeps a Bible in her bedroom?" That was a lie, Katherine didn't know whether Jane even owned one, but she reasoned that as a member of a religious household, chances were that there was a Bible somewhere. If Jane didn't have one, she could always borrow Catalina's, Katherine knew for sure that she kept one hidden in her room away from Anne's prying eyes. "... Should I tell her that you're visiting?"

 _"Hell no- don't tell her that I swore, and no you just make sure she's comfy and happy? What am I gonna do… she never showed any indication before…"_ The call ended, leaving Katherine with second thoughts about calling Dorothy instead of Jane's roommates. Catalina and Catherine would be willing to help, though Katherine wasn't sure if they had classes and didn't wish to disturb them.

"Katherine, is everything alright?" Jane had staggered out of her bedroom and was making her way to the kitchen, much to Katherine's panic. How much did she hear, the younger woman thought as she rushed to pour the water into a cup, sending the kettle to the floor with a loud crash as well as the cup. "Katherine! Are you hurt?! Did you burn yourself?!"

"N-No. I was just… um…" Katherine sighed, she was terrible at lying. All she could do was to guiltily hand Jane's phone back while she grabbed some paper towels to clean up the spilt water. Jane glanced at her phone, realising why Katherine was acting the way she was. "G-Good thing nothing broke! It'll be bad if you stepped on something sharp!"

"Katherine, you don't have to be so nervous. I actually heard everything, and no, my Bible is still in Lina's room. I think her copy was used in a bonfire Cathy started as a symbol for something… was it to raise awareness about the Nazi book burnings? I'm not sure about that bit, but she got into trouble for it." Jane shrugged, kneeling down to help Katherine clean up the mess. "I'm more worried that you hurt yourself, I couldn't bear the thought of being the reason you're injured."

"It's my fault, I shouldn't have gone behind your back and called your sister. I just… I didn't know what to do and I thought knowing how you helped your siblings recover would give me some insights…"

"It's the thought that counts, and I truly appreciate it. Thank you." Jane had a tender smile on her face as her fingers brushed against Katherine's, which sent Katherine into an internal overload. She only just noticed that every time their fingers brushed against each other, there was a small spark in Katherine's heart that made her yearn for more. She wasn't sure if that was how true friendship should be like, but either way she was all for it. "Actually, I do have a request if it's alright?"

"Anything!"

"I… well, this is rather embarrassing to say… but I don't suppose you could comfort me with physical contact?" Katherine flinched, internalising what Jane had asked of her. She nodded sadly, if it was what her friend wanted, then she would deliver. She started to unbutton her blouse, shrugging it off to reveal a lacy black bra. Jane immediately blushed and forced the blouse back on Katherine. "W-W-What are you doing?!"

"You said physical contact so I…"

"I-I meant allowing me to lean on your shoulder! I don't mean skin-to-skin contact to warm people up during a botched cave trip!" Jane shut her eyes tight, but unfortunately for her, the sight of Katherine's bra was burnt into her mind. She knew it was wrong to look at her friend in a way that wasn't appropriate, as such she did her best to banish that moment out from her head. "... C-Can I open my eyes now?"

"You're the first person that didn't take this chance to… never mind, yeah I'm dressed." Katherine trailed off, buttoning her blouse as she stared at Jane with renewed interest. No one knew, but many people had approached her wanting 'physical contact' shortly after she broke up with Henry. At that point, she felt so dirty that she figured that obliging the requests of strangers wouldn't make her feel any worse. Jane's eyes fluttered open, grey eyes unable to stare straight ahead in case Katherine still wasn't fully dressed. "You really are a nice person."

"I'm not, I'm just doing what anyone would do…" Jane mumbled, standing up abruptly. Katherine picked up the kettle and cup, placing them into the sink for her to clean later. "Anyways, I should go out and buy ingredients for later…"

"But you're supposed to be resting! I can buy food!" Katherine stopped Jane from heading to the entrance, she could tell that Jane still wasn't feeling well and the last thing she wanted was for Jane to collapse while paying for groceries. "You've been caring for others, please let me do the same for you."

"... _You're_ the nice one here."

* * *

"Okay, who's the munchkin?" Catherine asked as she returned home, secretly hoping that Katherine hadn't burnt down the place. She was greeted by Katherine, Jane, and a thinner Jane lookalike with her hair tied into a low ponytail. The lookalike scowled, startling Catherine. "Yikes, never thought I'll see the day that Seymour snaps at someone."

"Dorothy… please don't be rude to my roommate." Jane sighed, apologising to Catherine for her younger sister's poor behaviour. "Cathy, meet my youngest sister Dorothy. She came here upon learning that I wasn't feeling well."

"It's honestly your fault for chugging down seven cups of coffee from Anna's workplace. Anyways, I bought some jelly and biscuits. Is that what sick people eat?" Catherine made her way to the kitchen to place the paper bag onto the counter. She left once she placed the jellies in the refrigerator, noting that there was a pot containing cream of chicken soup left on the stove. Thankfully for everyone present, the stove was switched off. "Seymour, please don't tell me you cooked the soup."

"No, I did. Apparently, Jane's girlfriend can't cook." Dorothy grumbled, glaring at Katherine, who was sweating nervously. She assumed that everyone from Jane's family was mild-mannered, and was quickly proven wrong when she returned with canned soup and instant porridge mix. Catherine chuckled, while Jane gently reminded her sister that Katherine wasn't her girlfriend. "Fine, your 'friend' can't cook."

"I don't like how there are quotation marks involved, but that's an improvement…" Jane sighed, learning against Katherine's arm as the latter was too tall for her to lean on her shoulder. "How are classes Cathy?"

"Pretty shitty, but that's the life of an English major. Anyways, we sent Boleyn to attend your classes because you implied that there was a test."

"... I don't have any tests scheduled today. We've just finished our exams, why would any lecturer give us a test?" Jane asked, more concerned that Anne impersonated her and was probably sleeping during her lectures. "Dorothy, what about you? You're starting university this year right?"

"My grades are pretty decent, and I got permission to study in London if I'm accepted." Jane paled, she didn't like what Dorothy was implying and she feared that she would be corrupted by Anne should they ever meet. "Don't worry, I'll be living with John and his roommate which is totally his boyfriend but he never said anything about it so yeah."

"Why don't you just live in the dorms with others? You can make more friends that way." Katherine asked, the reason why she didn't apply for the dormitory was because there were additional fees involved and her aunt made it clear that the Boleyns would only pay for her education and provide her with a monthly allowance to cover daily expenses. Otherwise, she would've applied to stay in the university's dormitories.

"Mum said no, that I'll stray from the Lord and whatnot. Not like I'll have time to actually attend Sunday mass once I enter uni. Besides, I've been doing some reading and I find it a little restrictive at times. It doesn't really make sense too, why is there only one true God when others believe that there's more than one? What about the god in Islam? Who are we to denounce him as a false prophet? In fact, how can we be sure that there's really a spiritual being watching over us?"

"Never mind getting corrupted at the dorms, you're plenty corrupted without any external influence." Catherine smirked, earning herself a tired sigh from Jane. "Oh come on Seymour, it's healthy to think critically at times."

"Critical thought isn't encouraged back in Salisbury... or maybe it is, but my school didn't encourage it."

"A shame. By the way Seymour, do you mind if I have some of your soup for myself?" Catherine asked, already halfway towards the kitchen. Dorothy got up and went after her, her intentions unclear to everyone present. That left Katherine alone with Jane, who was growing drowsy with every passing second.

"Oh Jane, just wanted to tell you to be careful. I felt that someone was watching me when I went out just now." Katherine whispered, trying her best to not startle Jane. The latter was startled nonetheless, and looked up to face Katherine. "Sorry, just go back to sleep?"

"Be careful Katherine, there have been reports of break-ins recently. I know that you always lock your door but… well, stay safe as much as possible." Jane mumbled, she knew that Katherine was partial to keeping her house secure but it didn't hurt to remind the Theatre major. She smiled, murmuring thanks for the reminder. Catherine returned to the living room with a bowl of soup, while Dorothy simply glowered behind her. Jane didn't know what changed, Dorothy used to be sweet and was polite to everyone. "Dorothy, do our parents know about this visit?"

"Yeah, they know that I'm here to get first-hand opinions regarding some majors."

"... Dorothy."

"What do you want me to tell them, that you're sick in bed because you drank poisoned coffee?! No way, it'll be chaos."

"Yeah Seymour, don't drink poisoned coffee next time."

"I did that for a good reason and you know it."

* * *

**[protect the babies squad]**

_**[6.20 PM]** _

**Regrets &Coffee: **Update: Seymour's sister came to visit and will be crashing in her bedroom.

 **Mentally Dead:** Wow, she found out that Jane fell sick?

 **Regrets &Coffee: **Howard contacted her in a panic because she didn't know what Seymour does to her siblings when they fall sick.

 **that boleyn girl:** which sis came over

 **Regrets &Coffee: **Dorothy, she's the angry one.

 **Mentally Dead:** The youngest one? Wait, but Jane said that they were all pleasant people

 **KweenCleves:** she probs thot tht kat was the new henry

 **that boleyn girl:** i dun like her

 **Mentally Dead:** Girl, you haven't even met her! None of us have!

 **Regrets &Coffee: **Ahem.

 **Mentally Dead:** Fine, no one but Catherine

 **KweenCleves:** any progress on the ship?

 **Regrets &Coffee: **They're now reenacting my sick fic except it's Seymour who's ill.

 **that boleyn girl:** legit weird tht u write abt ur friends

 **Regrets &Coffee: **I don't write smut about them, we've talked about this!

 **that boleyn girl:** but u write smut abt me n cat????

 **Regrets &Coffee:** Would you want me to write smut between you and myself?

 **KweenCleves:** if u do pls make anne bottom

 **that boleyn girl:** excuse me wht

 **Mentally Dead:** Anne, don't be mean

 **Mentally Dead:** She's already bottoming in real life, let's give fictional Bo a chance to top someone

 **that boleyn girl:** excuse u we r both switches

 **Mentally Dead:** And how many times have you topped me this week?

 **that boleyn girl:**...fuck

 **KweenCleves:** YOOOOO ANNE JUST GOT SERVED BITCH

 **that boleyn girl:** i hate u so much

 **Regrets &Coffee: **I mean... I could write you topping me if you want?

 **that boleyn girl:** I RATHER TOP CAT IRL

 **Mentally Dead:** Moving on...

 **Mentally Dead:** Can Dorothy cook?

 **Regrets &Coffee: **Yep.

 **Mentally Dead:** Good, let's send Jane back to Kat's place

 **that boleyn girl:** bitch no

 **KweenCleves:** yea shes sick

 **that boleyn girl:** thts not the issues here

 **that boleyn girl:** omgggg

 **that boleyn girl:** this can be like a fic abt nursing tht slut back to health aft puking or shit

 **Regrets &Coffee: **Actually, that's a part of the sick fic mentioned.

 **Mentally Dead:** … Permission to throw out your laptop?

 **Regrets &Coffee: **DON'T YOU YEET MY LIFE'S WORK!

 **that boleyn girl:** wow been so long since yeet appeared

 **KweenCleves:** why is she at my workplace anyways

 **that boleyn girl:** i wanna lure kitty to talk abt her feelings n shit in a private place

 **Mentally Dead:** And only your workplace is devoid of customers

 **Mentally Dead:** Also, we couldn't find anyone else after Jane drank all those coffee

 **KweenCleves:** its fine no one steals frm us

 **KweenCleves:** evryithindsg disgusting

 **Regrets &Coffee: **I don't understand why do you continue to work there if you find the conditions intolerable.

 **KweenCleves:** nyeh poor life choices also i kinda like hving the whole place to ourselves to talk shit

 **that boleyn girl:** persmission to scream in chat?

 **Regrets &Coffee: **Knock yourself out.

 **that boleyn girl:** jskhisgafuksdgfkasdfiuagweilfusgdzfukgvgdfuykwesUKDgfaes

 **that boleyn girl:** much better

 **Mentally Dead:** Why did you need to scream over chat?

 **that boleyn girl:** oh i felt like it lol

 **KweenCleves:** gurl ur chaotic af

 **Regrets &Coffee: **#PrayforAragón2021

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> 1\. Is it right for the members of the [protect the babies squad] to assume that both Jane and Katherine are interested in women? Why or why not?
> 
> 2\. What is your opinion on people shipping friends together? Discuss.
> 
> 3\. Should Jane have hidden from her family that she fell sick from food poisoning five years ago? Why or why not and what consequences could it have in the worst case scenario?
> 
> 4\. Is it extreme for Dorothy to visit Jane in London upon hearing that the latter was sick? Why or why not?
> 
> 5\. Is critical thought a bane or a boon? Explain.
> 
> 6\. Why do you think some people continue to work in less than ideal conditions? Assume that this scenario is within a highly-developed region.


	10. Chapter 10

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> As mentioned in Chapter 1, Jane, Anne and Katherine are all related to each other in this story and there might be questions at the end of each questions for you to think/reflect on. Basically similar to Literature books.

**[blue n red]**

_**[3.08 PM]** _

**katsitter:** omg they r going to the lbkstorer

 **that boleyn girl:** lets crash their date

 **Mentally Dead:** No! No one's crashing on their date!

 **J.S.:** We don't even know which bookstore.

 **that boleyn girl:** we can stalk

 **katsitter:** orrrrrr maybe we just check in periodially

 **Mentally Dead:** Yeah, we're doing that

 **that boleyn girl:** booooooring

 **J.S.:** Oh hush, how would you like it if we stalk you and Lina?

 **Mentally Dead:** Don't give her ideas, she may very well do a Haus of Holbein flashmob

 **that boleyn girl:** the slime tutorials showed me how to holbein dance

 **J.S.:** Slime tutorials? What are they?

 **katsitter:** bootlegs of musicals

 **J.S.:** Bootlegs?

 **Mentally Dead:** Some people film musicals and upload them online, usually YouTube

 **J.S.:** That's illegal!

 **katsitter:** the queens love to take the front row phones away during megasix

 **J.S.:** That's stealing!

 **that boleyn girl:** chill they return it aftwards

 **that boleyn girl:** also lets german dance in there

 **J.S.:** That's inappropriate!

 **Mentally Dead:** Honey, everything about Bo is inappropriate

* * *

"Cathy, what's that book all about?" Anna asked, the woman in question ignoring her as she was too engrossed with the book. After calling out Catherine's name twice, Anna lightly tapped on Catherine's shoulder, the latter glancing at her friend with a hint of a smile on her face. "What's it all about?"

"Sarah Waters' 'The Fingersmith'. It's a classic." Anna nodded, she recalled watching a film that was set in Korea during the 1930s, with it being an adaptation to the novel mentioned. "There's a series about it, not a long one though but it's great."

"Sounds great, let's hope Netflix has it or something." Anna chuckled as she glanced at the books on the shelf beside her, with one of them catching her eye. "Ooh, hallo there."

"What did you find?" Catherine was presented with a book that had a Gothic castle depicted in the cover, the title bolded in white and an Anna grinning away at her find. "Looks interesting, are you going to get that?"

"Why not? Let's hope Anne doesn't chuck it in a fire or something." Anna replied as she made her way to the stationery section, with numerous pens in stock along with notebooks and craft materials. "Kat's pretty good at making arts and crafts, she used to volunteer at orphanages to teach them how to make stuff. Never seen it for myself though, Anne mentioned it once."

"Seymour's damn good at knitting, maybe we should get them to make stuff together."

"Ja, that's _totes_ a date even though it doesn't look like one." They both had silly smiles on their faces as they went to the children's section, admiring the coloured covers the books had in order to attract young readers. "Cathy, how many tattoos do you have?"

"Oh right, I never really showed them to you. I lost count, but here's my first tattoo." Catherine rolled up her left sleeve, revealing a tattoo of a pen and a microphone crossing each other on her wrist. "Hurt like a bitch but afterwards it got better."

"Whoa, that's hella rad. Why a pen and a microphone though?"

"... I like Queen Parr's characterisation in the musical, and any lyrics that she sang were lit as fuck." Catherine admitted, unrolling her sleeve and pushing her glasses up to smooth over her awkwardness. "... Don't tell the rest that, they don't have to know that I'm a fan of a musical that has some inaccuracies."

"Aw, I dig a girl who's passionate about her interests though." Anna could always out Anne as a fellow 'Six' musical fan, even though the latter nearly ruined the performance by pointing out the inaccuracies as well as heckling the one playing Catalina de Aragón. Luckily, the performers were good at improvising. "What's your most painful tattoo to date?"

"The one on my ribs, you can ask Howard about that one. I cried for hours." Catherine let out a bark, shedding a few tears upon recalling that particular memory. Back then, she cried because her tattoo hurt. Now, she cried because it was simply too hilarious to not share with someone else. "Three guesses on what that tattoo is."

"No idea, a quote you fancy?"

"You must be reading my mind." Anna shrugged, she heard that tattooing words were more painful, and Catherine was a fan of quality literature so it made sense that she would have a tattoo about her favourite quote from a novel. "It's from 'Pride and Prejudice'."

"An Austen fan until the bitter end."

"Can't help it, this particular quote was screaming out to me, begging for me to ink it on my skin. How could I refuse?"

"Oh? So what's the quote?"

"It's 'But people themselves alter so much, that there is something new to be observed in them for ever'. I agree with this though, people are ever-changing and there's always something new about them. It's like Seymour's sister, except I don't think she's pleased that her sister changed so drastically from the sister she left behind in Wiltshire."

"... How painful is a shoulder tattoo?" Anna had been considering getting a tattoo for quite a while now, she just didn't have the courage to enter a tattoo parlour and get one out of fear for messing up. "And while I'm on this, do you think I should dye some parts of my hair red? I wanted to before I started uni, but Haus of Holbein officially turned me off."

"Shoulder tattoos aren't bad, will hurt quite a bit though." Catherine replied, staring intently at Anna's glossy raven hair. She grinned, she could see Anna rocking a red streak in her hair. "You know what, after this we should go dye your hair or something."

"Seriously?! That'll be so awesome! Kat's gonna be a squealing fit and Anne! Anne will probably make a reference to last year but fuck her!"

"I'm pretty sure Aragón wouldn't want that, but yes."

* * *

**[henry viii's ex-wives]**

_**[6.45 PM]** _

**KweenCleves:** take a look at me bitches

 **KweenCleves:** [newyrnewme.jpg]

 **that boleyn girl:** u went back to holbeins for the hairdye?????

 **Regrets &Coffee: **No, she went to a professional to dye her hair.

 **Regrets &Coffee: **Why would we go there anyways?

 **katsitter:** to support ze poor ppl there?

 **Mentally Dead:** Not the time to have a German accent in your message Kat

 **katsitter:** but but but

 **katsitter:** u look so cool tho!!!!

 **katsitter:** we can be the died duo!!

 **katsitter:** wait no i meant dyed

 **J.S.:** It suits you Anna!

 **J.S.:** Red is really your colour.

 **KweenCleves:** not trying to be mean here but i thot u wld be against it

 **J.S.:** It's your hair, and why would I be against it?

 **that boleyn girl:** u kno like shes ruining gods gift or smth

 **J.S.:** If I actually thought that, I wouldn't be hanging out with Katherine.

 **J.S.:** We've known each other for a few months now, isn't it obvious?

 **Regrets &Coffee: **They're just teasing.

 **Mentally Dead:** Bo's dead serious honestly

 **that boleyn girl:** ok tbf i dunno whether u broke urself frm the church yet or not

 **J.S.:** I'm confused, I can be religious and open-minded?

 **J.S.:** I'm not going to condemn you if you did something illegal.

 **J.S.:** I mean I should, but I wouldn't if we're friends.

 **that boleyn girl:** idea

 **that boleyn girl:** we make janey an accomplice in criming

 **Mentally Dead:** Jesus Christ Bo, leave Jane out of this

 **Regrets &Coffee: **Be gay, do crimes.

 **that boleyn girl:** ooh petition to identify myself as gay

 **katsitter:** u dun hv to be gay to do crime

 **KweenCleves:** yea u just hv to look gay

 **that boleyn girl:** ok ok so chaotic femme??

 **that boleyn girl:** annas a chaotic butch

 **that boleyn girl:** kittys a chaotic cinnamon roll

 **J.S.:** How did putting each other into labels end up with pastries?

 **J.S.:** Speaking of cinnamon rolls, I think I should try making them one of these days.

 **Mentally Dead:** Catherine's the tired hipster

 **Mentally Dead:** I'm the cool big sister

 **that boleyn girl:** press f for doubt

 **Mentally Dead:** And Jane's the mum ally who has a tea addiction

 **J.S.:** What's a hipster?

 **KweenCleves:** literally cathay

 **katsitter:** yupppp cathys a hipster

 **that boleyn girl:** pffffft she only looks like one

 **Regrets &Coffee: **I just wear hipstery specs, and a flannel

 **that boleyn girl:** im gonna send u some pics of hipsters ltr

 **that boleyn girl:** idea again

 **that boleyn girl:** i sing my solo

 **J.S.:** Uh oh.

 **katsitter:** here we go

 **KweenCleves:** why r u guys enabling her

 **Mentally Dead:** Well I didn't know that she has a microphone!

 **Regrets &Coffee: **What?!

 **Mentally Dead:** Like, what do you want me to do?!

 **Regrets &Coffee: **Where the fuck did she get a microphone?!

 **J.S.:** From a man busking.

 **katsitter:** jfc shes singing now in public

 **that boleyn girl:** wht was i meant to do lol

 **J.S.:** Continue singing while the three of us flee the scene.

 **J.S.:** Everyone's staring at you by the way.

 **KweenCleves:** pls tell me this isnt anne

 **KweenCleves:** [chaoticidiot.jpg]

 **katsitter:** huge oof

 **Mentally Dead:** That's her alright

 **Mentally Dead:** I advise you two to run before authorities assume that you're with her

 **that boleyn girl:** fuck u all

* * *

"This makes good cardio!" Katherine panted as she stopped at a corner, far from Anne's dreadful singing. Catalina caught up with her, out of breath as she wasn't as fit as Katherine. Jane had collapsed a few metres away from them, unable to go on and could only twitch on the pavement as she waited for someone to collect her. "Shit, did she collapse again?"

"Yeah, she's over there." Catalina jerked a thumb to where Jane was, with Katherine grimacing at the pool of sweat Jane was lying in. "She's still alive right?"

"Dorothy will kill me if she's dead, so yeah she's definitely alive." Katherine made her way to Jane, the latter begging God to send her to heaven if it meant never running again. "... Lin-Liiiiiiiiin? I think she's traumatised..."

"Girl, you made her do cardio. Of course she's traumatised as fuck." Anne appeared before them, having been chased away by nearby authorities for her dreadful singing. She nearly tripped over Jane, who wouldn't make a noise even if Anne used her as a cushion to support her. "Fuck, she caught up."

"Oui oui, bonjour. Now, what's up with this sad bitch lying in a puddle of her sweat?"

"That puddle represents her disappointment towards you. Bad cousin, very bad cousin."

"I'm not a god damn dog!" Anne kicked Jane, yelping in pain shortly after. She felt like she had just kicked a bag of bricks, and Jane not making any sound didn't help. "Fucking hell, is Janey okay?! She's like a sack of bricks!"

"I just… needed to catch my breath… also my back hurts." Jane wheezed, never again would she run, no matter the reason. The three women grimaced, starting to grow worried that Jane wasn't feeling well. She had recently recovered from the seven cups of coffee, they didn't want their friend to fall ill barely days after her recovery. "You know… I think I'm up for some murder…"

"Bo, apologise before she offs your head."

"What?! All I did was to sing! All you wanna do is to silence me!"

"Oh boo _fucking_ hoo, I'm sorry that I'm not tone deaf like you!"

"Bitch, get off your high horse! Just because you were in choir back at church doesn't mean you can write me off!"

"Write you off?! Ask everyone, they'll tell you that your singing bloody sucks!" Katherine kneeled on the floor, leaning closer to Jane. Jane managed to steal a glance upwards, aware that Katherine's face was hovering near her.

"Okay while they try to tear each other's faces off, we should discuss a strategy to get them together."

"... Isn't their bantering considered flirting for them?"

"That's not romantic and they banter all the time! They need something to spice things up!"

"Are you talking about their night activities or…?"

"How does pushing them into River Thames sound?"

"If I were to reference Cathy's message in the group chat, I would say that I'm not gay enough to commit a crime."

"... We push them into a fountain?"

"I'll consider it."

* * *

**[haus of holbein!!!]**

_**[8.10 PM]** _

**KweenCleves:** supppp bitches

 **KweenCleves:** u want me to get anything for dinner??

 **KweenCleves:** ive eaten but liek i cld swing by somehwere

 **katsitter:** ooh yes pls

 **katsitter:** srry runsbakdihu awy fm cuz

 **katsitter:** weodjsgfjhdasjfhausgdfckzgfuuwsg

 **KweenCleves:** jfc wtf happened

 **KweenCleves:** nvr mind i ask the functioning grp

**[henry viii's ex-wives]**

_**[8.13 PM]** _

**KweenCleves:** ok somonnee spill the tea

 **KweenCleves:** wht happened

 **J.S.:** Katherine and I pushed Lina and Anne into a fountain.

 **J.S.:** I'm hiding from them because I refuse to do cardio again.

 **Regrets &Coffee: **Hold the phone, YOU pushed someone into a fountain?!

 **J.S.:** Not my finest moment but the water was clean!

 **J.S.:** Probably.

 **J.S.:** They should go to the hospital just in case they catch typhoid.

 **KweenCleves:** dakjsdgsgfuiawgefskdc

 **KweenCleves:** kats rubbing off u

 **J.S.:** I'll explain to you the reason privately.

**[make araleyn a thing!!!]**

_**[8.21 PM]** _

**J.S.:** It was Katherine's idea to push them into the fountain.

 **J.S.:** Said that it was romantic.

 **Regrets &Coffee: **Nearly being trampled by a horse? Romantic.

 **Regrets &Coffee: **Pushing your frenemy AND her crush into the water? Ruined makeup.

 **J.S.:** I would personally rather catch pneumonia than be crushed to death by an equine.

 **KweenCleves:** u cld just leave em alone?????

 **J.S.:** I believe there's a phrase that Katherine once told me that's highly applicable in this situation.

 **J.S.:** "No thoughts, head empty".

 **J.S.:** Did I use it right?

 **KweenCleves:** hhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh the grandma just

 **KweenCleves:** sksksksksksksks

 **Regrets &Coffee: **So… you just sacrificed Howard to them?

 **J.S.:** I refuse to run again.

 **J.S.:** Pardon my French but heck no.

 **KweenCleves:** gurl where r u

 **J.S.:** At a 7-Eleven.

 **katsitter:** ITS HELL

 **katsitter:** HELLS REAL N I JUST SAW IT

 **katsitter:** OH

 **katsitter:** IM NEAR A 711

 **J.S.:** I see you Katherine!

 **J.S.:** I'm waving through the window!

 **Regrets &Coffee: **Anna, which one sounds better? SAD!Seymour x Howard or Seymour x SAD!Howard?

 **KweenCleves:** wht does tht mean

 **katsitter:** the seonnd one sounds more logucsl

"What does social anxiety disorder and waving through the window have in common?" Jane asked, frowning at her phone as Katherine sidled up to the blonde woman, her pink eyes warily staring at the slushie Jane was holding. "Do you want one? It's pineapple."

"Any other flavours?"

"There's pink lemonade. By the way, did you hear about the man who was crying over an apple? He pined-apple!"

"That was seriously lame as hell but still, you tried so kudos for that." Katherine chuckled, Jane's puns were terrible and yet she couldn't stop. Jane had a ghost of a smile on her face as she stared out the window, searching for Catalina or Anne. "I don't think they'll come this far."

"I'm sorry for leaving you with them, I shouldn't have left you to fend for yourself." Jane apologised, how could she consider herself Katherine's friend when she wasn't ready to brave whatever challenges that came their way? Katherine hip-bumped Jane, a teasing grin plastered on her features as she held an empty cup. "I sincerely apologise."

"C'mon Jane, it's not like you'll last a second with those two anyways. Besides, we get to chill in here without worrying about them jumpscaring us." Katherine replied, gently pressing her body against Jane's. Jane hummed in agreement, it was indeed nice to have a respite from being hunted by two of their friends. "Maybe I'm just being paranoid, but I still feel like I'm being watched."

"This is a stupid question, but is it because of the security camera above us?" Jane pointed to a security camera attached onto the corner closest to them, red lights blinking periodically. Katherine shook her head, explaining that what she felt was more predatory than normal staring. Jane frowned, she had a theory but she didn't want to voice it out lest it made Katherine overly paranoid. "... Maybe we should think about it when we return, I don't think getting worried in the middle of nowhere would help us to lay out all the possibilities."

"This outlet is literally beside Starbucks, we're not in the middle of nowhere." Jane giggled, Katherine had a point. When there was Starbucks, there was bound to be people getting their caffeine fix. If one was lucky, they could witness Catherine ordering three Trenta sized Espressos much to the cashier's horror. "This is nice, just me, you and some peace."

"Mmhm, and slushed ice. This is the life." Katherine rolled her eyes, going over to the slushie machine to fill her cup with a mix of pink lemonade and pineapple. "Do you want to hear another pun?"

"I think I've hit my pun quota for the day, you've really been punting them my way." Jane snickered, of all the things to rub off Katherine, it had to be her occasional puns. "Why do you like telling puns anyways? The ones from you are always a total cringefest."

"... In my first year of uni, I told a pun to a fellow classmate who was crying. He smiled afterwards, and I started telling puns to those who need some cheer in their lives. Sometimes, I insert puns in daily conversation even when they're fine just to keep the mood above water."

"That's really sweet of you."

"Just doing what we're supposed to do." Jane drank her slushie slowly, under Katherine's watchful eyes. She left briefly to pay for her drink, returning only to witness Jane desperately sucking the flavoured ice through the straw. "Oh don't tell me I'm already immune to brain freezes…"

"Do _not_ use that as a reason to get more slushies!"

* * *

**[protect the babies squad]**

_**[9.35 PM]** _

**Mentally Dead:** [7elevendate.jpg]

 **that boleyn girl:** who knew kitty cld run

 **KweenCleves:** waitttttt ur not chasing them anymore???

 **that boleyn girl:** lol nope

 **that boleyn girl:** yea its winter n we r fucking cold

 **that boleyn girl:** but its hard to stay mad at them

 **that boleyn girl:** they looks adorbs

 **Mentally Dead:** Jane kept on apologising even as she ran away

 **Mentally Dead:** Kat was giggling cheekily

 **Regrets &Coffee: **So you two weren't chasing them?

 **that boleyn girl:** lol we were but not to catch them

 **Mentally Dead:** Exercising in winter is a good way to stay warm

 **Mentally Dead:** Especially after being pushed into a freezing fountain

 **KweenCleves:** aw man i wanna kno wht they r talking abt

 **that boleyn girl:** occasional stolen glances

 **that boleyn girl:** soft chuckls

 **that boleyn girl:** tender body smooshing

 **Regrets &Coffee: **Basically straight out of a Victorian novel.

 **that boleyn girl:** yepppp

 **that boleyn girl:** when was the last time kitty smiled like tht

 **Mentally Dead:** When she first met Jane?

 **KweenCleves:** i was abt to say tht time when anne gave holbeins free advertisggu

 **Regrets &Coffee: **Aragón, have you eaten dinner yet?

 **that boleyn girl:** bitch no

 **Regrets &Coffee: **I couldn't give two shits about you Boleyn.

 **Mentally Dead:** We haven't eaten, and originally we planned to get something from 7Eleven but…

 **Regrets &Coffee: **Right… Seymour's in there with Howard.

 **that boleyn girl:** lets just go to the pictures n grab some popcorn

 **that boleyn girl:** orrrrrr we cld go into starbucks n eat some cake

 **KweenCleves:** or i cld just buy u dinner

 **that boleyn girl:**...wht u got

 **KweenCleves:** dun worry theres no kfc

 **that boleyn girl:** ooooo

 **Regrets &Coffee: **What's wrong with KFC?

 **that boleyn girl:** ive kfcphobia

 **KweenCleves:** we usually take turns to buy dinner n kat always gets kfc

 **Mentally Dead:** Damn, at least get Burger King

 **Mentally Dead:** They have some tasty nuggets

 **that boleyn girl:** ngl i want some nuggies now

 **KweenCleves:** ur coming hm rite

 **that boleyn girl:** fuck yea

 **that boleyn girl:** cat if i fall sick ur coming over to take care of me

 **Mentally Dead:** Bo, if you fall sick what makes you think I'll be well enough to care for you

 **Mentally Dead:** If anything, you'll be the one coming over

 **that boleyn girl:** wtf why

 **Mentally Dead:** Idiots don't get sick after all

 **KweenCleves:** SBGASYUGFASDGFAGS

 **KweenCleves:** SHE WENT THERE

 **Regrets &Coffee: **You got served Boleyn, and well roasted like my favourite coffee.

 **that boleyn girl:** im just gonna be mature n walk away now

 **Mentally Dead:** Awwww are you at a loss for words?

 **that boleyn girl:** WALKING AWAY

* * *

**[henry viii's ex-wives]**

_**[10.58 PM]** _

**KweenCleves:** gurl wtf wru kat

 **that boleyn girl:** istg if its a hotel…

 **katsitter:** in jail

 **that boleyn girl:** WHT

 **that boleyn girl:** JANE SEYMOUR U BLOODY SLUT

 **J.S.:** We are NOT in jail.

 **Mentally Dead:** It's almost 2300!

 **Mentally Dead:** Please tell me that both of you are on the way back

 **Mentally Dead:** Did you two get anything from 7Eleven?

 **katsitter:** wait how did u kno we were at 711

 **Regrets &Coffee: **Forget your clairvoyance, whatever happened to ransacking the fridge?

 **Mentally Dead:** We need to go on a food run soon Catherine

 **J.S.:** I could do it after I send Katherine home, there should be a 24/7 grocery store.

 **Regrets &Coffee: **No.

 **Regrets &Coffee: **We'll come with you.

 **Mentally Dead:** You just want to sneak in some coffee!

 **that boleyn girl:** lets stuff some crisps in

 **KweenCleves:** some meat wld be niceee

 **katsitter:** dun put stuff in when we dun live there

 **KweenCleves:** uh no we wanna go on a run WITH them

 **that boleyn girl:** yea we can always pay for our shit to janey

 **Regrets &Coffee: **… But you three can't cook?

 **that boleyn girl:** if u see a fire report in the news thst us

 **Mentally Dead:** Jesus Christ, can one of you try to learn how to cook?!

 **KweenCleves:** jane taught kat how to cook for ur bd

 **katsitter:** n all my hopes went up in flames

 **Mentally Dead:**...There has to be a reason why the food keeps on burning

 **Regrets &Coffee: **Have any of you tried following a recipe book?

 **katsitter:** it went up in flames too rmb??

 **J.S.:** I don't mind if Anne and Anna want to tag along, but please behave like adults.

 **that boleyn girl:** bitch i can deck u in a fite

 **katsitter:** no punching ppl!!

 **katsitter:** esp jane!

 **katsitter:** i mean dun punch ppl esp jane

 **J.S.:** Anne should be the one worrying.

 **that boleyn girl:** oh pls all u did was tear out a chunk of my heair

 **that boleyn girl:** n nearly scratched my eyes out

 **that boleyn girl:** n almost lefft me blind

 **KweenCleves:** it sounds like u lost???

 **that boleyn girl:** i choked her

 **that boleyn girl:** n punched her

 **that boleyn girl:** n lots of bdsm shit

 **Mentally Dead:** I don't recall you tying her up?

 **that boleyn girl:** lol no i kicked her ladybits

 **that boleyn girl:** n tossed her cross during the fite

 **that boleyn girl:** not on purpose tho

 **J.S.:** It's fine, I found it shortly after.

 **J.S.:** Then I somehow lost it afterwards.

 **Regrets &Coffee: **… That might be because of me.

 **J.S.:** … What did you protest about?

 **Regrets &Coffee: **Uh.

 **Regrets &Coffee: **… How Catholicism is oppressing Protestantism?

 **KweenCleves:** how many demos r u in???

 **Mentally Dead:** Wait, is that why my Bible went missing?!

 **Regrets &Coffee: **No, that was to highlight the Nazi book burnings.

 **katsitter:** why cant u use ur own bks

 **katsitter:** also jane ur rite abt the nazi book burnings

 **J.S.:** Thank you, I want my cross back by the way.

 **Regrets &Coffee: **You're free to search my room for it, though there's a small chance that I may have lost it on campus.

 **Regrets &Coffee: **Also, why would I burn my own books when I still read them?

 **Mentally Dead:** I still read my Bible!

 **Regrets &Coffee: **Should I change my username to 'Depresso Espresso'?

 **Mentally Dead:** Change it to 'I'm fucked because I swiped a Bible book that was still loved'

 **Regrets &Coffee: **Too long.

 **Regrets &Coffee: **Besides, Seymour doesn't use her Bible anymore.

 **J.S.:** Don't make sweeping assumptions Cathy.

 **that boleyn girl:** cool story bro now when shld we meet up n wht time

 **Mentally Dead:** For?

 **KweenCleves:** food

 **KweenCleves:** drinks

 **KweenCleves:** holbein bras for jane

 **J.S.:** Actually, I do need more bras.

 **J.S.:** They went missing.

 **Regrets &Coffee: **Oh yeah, I forgot to tell you that I'm using them tomorrow.

 **Regrets &Coffee: **It's for a valid reason this time.

 **katsitter:** im outside n pls say tht theres dinner for me

 **KweenCleves:** fuck

 **J.S.:** Is there anything edible?

 **KweenCleves:** uhhhh tidepods???

 **J.S.:** I said edible, not poisonous.

 **katsitter:** dun worry its an inside joke tht doesnt involve any of us eating dertegnts

 **katsitter:** imma gonna eat cuzs secret candy stash frm halloween

 **Mentally Dead:** Are they expired?

 **katsitter:** shld be fine

 **katsitter:** gave jane expired meds n look at her

 **katsitter:** [sunshinesmile.jpg]

 **Regrets &Coffee: **That's just a woman who looks like she has her life together but is dying on the inside.

 **J.S.:** I ran today, what did you expect?

**[that boleyn girl]**

_**[11.14 PM]** _

**that boleyn girl:** we r still on for protests outside holbeins rite

 **Regrets &Coffee: **Definitely, I borrowed all of Seymour's bras from Holbein's.

 **Regrets &Coffee: **Also, you may want to protect your Halloween candy.

 **that boleyn girl:** ngl we might hv to burn them to protsct her

 **that boleyn girl:** or to burn the place down

 **Regrets &Coffee: **Just don't tell anyone that I'm doing crimes with you.

 **that boleyn girl:** chill

 **that boleyn girl:** i wont tell anyone tht ur one of us

 **Regrets &Coffee: **10.30 in the morning?

 **that boleyn girl:** yepp see u ltr


	11. Chapter 11

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> As mentioned in Chapter 1, Jane, Anne and Katherine are all related to each other in this story and there might be questions at the end of each questions for you to think/reflect on. Basically similar to Literature books.

"Bet I can race ya to the exit!" Anne exclaimed as she grabbed Jane's shopping cart and sped away from the group, with Anna following closely behind her. The rest sighed at the chaos left behind, with Jane hoping that they wouldn't be escorted out and banned for life. She glared at Catherine, who did her best to avoid her roommate's grey eyes. She didn't plan for Jane's bras to _actually_ be set on fire, and for once, Anne wasn't the one who started it. "Keep up Anna!"

"... Since when do you vandalise innocent stores?" Jane asked, crossing her arms. Catherine sighed, she had explained to the police that the protest was meant to be peaceful and all they were supposed to do was to hold up products from Haus of Holbein. It went awry when someone lit up their hair dye, which prompted half of the protesters to follow suit. "Cathy, that's a crime."

"Okay okay, I've learnt my lesson. I'll pay for your new bras at a reputable store afterwards." She knew that she was at fault, even though she never planned on taking things too far. Catalina and Katherine remained silent, they both could tell that Jane was truly angry at her friend, more so because Catherine could've gotten hurt than her burnt bras. "... Do you girls think that Anna likes me less now?"

"Anna doesn't care if you have a criminal charge! But maybe don't commit a crime next time." Katherine replied, flinching as she heard a crash around the corner. "... That's my cousin right?"

"I'll be damned if it isn't Bo or Anna."

"We should check on them, they might have gotten hurt." Jane said, making her way to the aisle where the crash came from. Upon arrival, the four women saw Anna dusting the cart while Anne was tossing bags of potato crisps into the cart. Katherine covered her face with her hands, never had she felt as mortified as she was that day. Catalina swore in Spanish, while Catherine shook her head with mock disapproval at the sight. "... I see that both of you are okay."

"Never been better Janey, should we get sour cream and onions or barbecue?" Anne held up two bags of crisps with the mentioned flavours, with Jane staring blankly at the bags. She eventually pointed to the sour cream and onion flavoured bag of crisps, her deadpan look never leaving her face. "Oof, Mum just gave me the look of disappointment."

"Why am I not surprised?" Catalina commented, shrugging as Catherine opened the freezer behind them, examining a few brands of ice cream. She nudged Katherine, who peeked through the gaps in between her fingers. Katherine pointed to a box of Magnum ice cream and a tub of Häagen-Dazs ice cream. "Catherine, you seeing this?"

"Hm? Oh sorry, I was occupied." Catalina glanced back, taking a double-take as Catherine cradled a box and three tubs of the mentioned ice cream brands in her arms. The Psychology major facepalmed, she forgot that they still had a chaotic woman and a wildcard with them. Jane didn't know that Catherine was planning to buy ice cream, her attention was solely focused on two hellraisers determined to raid the shelves. "Hey Boleyn, is there any space for ice cream?"

"Throw 'em here Cathy!" Anna waved, successfully catching two tubs of ice cream from Catherine. Jane stared at Anna, then her roommate, then at Katherine, who had the door open and was cooling off with the freezer. Jane let out a heavy sigh as she pulled Katherine away from the freezer and shut the door, placing her forehead against the younger woman's shoulder. "She shoots, she scores! Give it up for Catherine Parr!"

"Jane, do we have enough money for ice cream?" Catalina asked, her eyebrows raising slightly as she witnessed Jane grumbling softly into Katherine's shoulder. Recently, Catalina had noticed that Jane was opening up more and exhibited various emotions apart from being happy. While the changes could only be observed when Katherine was present, it was a new side of Jane that Catalina, despite years of friendship, had never seen before. "... Catherine, let's toss in a few more tubs. Make an ice cream party or something."

" _Yes_. Jane, Häagen-Dazs or Magnum?" Catherine opened the freezer once more, her face scrunched up as a blast of cold air hit her. Jane sighed, knowing that it was best to give up when even Catalina was involved. 

"... Häagen-Dazs, chocolate please."

"Awesome, I'm just gonna throw in a cookies and cream in there because I'm basic as hell."

* * *

"Okay… so if I put the tubs here, the box will be like this… but the Magnum ones expire first so I should put them here… but what if Lina and Cathy want the Häagen-Dazs?" Jane muttered to herself as she tried to place the ice cream in the most efficient way possible while considering her roommates' desires. "Lina, are you going to eat the Häagen-Dazs ice cream first or the Magnum ones?"

"I have no idea girl, whatever I feel like eating?"

"Okay, then which flavour?"

"... Whatever I feel like eating?"

"... What flavour would Anne feel like eating?"

"Oh, definitely your chocolate ice cream." Catalina knew that Anne liked stealing other people's ice cream, Katherine was one of her many victims and possibly one of the earliest. Jane said nothing and rearranged the ice creams in such a way that prevented Anne from gaining easy access to her personal pint. "By the way Jane, have you found your cross yet?"

"Mmhm, it's underneath Cathy's bed." Jane replied, closing the refrigerator door. She had a feeling that Anne, Anna and Katherine would come over just to have ice cream even though they had their own. Not that she minded, Katherine needed reasons for her two roommates to go over to Jane's place so that they could execute her plans to pair them up. "Should I wear it though?"

"Do you want to?"

"I… Lina, can I be honest with you?" Jane wasn't sure if she should tell her best friend, who was supposedly still religious, about her concerns. She wasn't sure if she had the right to consider Catalina her best friend, since she had only allowed herself to be more vulnerable around Katherine. Thoughts aside, only Catalina could provide an opinion she needed since they were both Catholics. Her roommate nodded, a smile on her face as she made her way to where Jane was. "I… I don't think I should wear it, not when I've strayed so much."

"Oh Jane… not going to church for a few years doesn't mean that you've strayed." Catalina placed a comforting hand on Jane's shoulder, noticing that the latter flinched upon her touch. Jane looked away, which worried Catalina. "Jane? Do you want to talk about it?"

"I've harmed people Lina. I've wished for Henry to be harmed. I've sinned Lina, I've strayed from Him for a while now."

"You said that you didn't want Henry to die!"

"That's the thing Lina, I didn't want him to _die_. I wanted him to be _harmed_. I wanted him to live in agony for the rest of his life, that's worse than wanting him to die." Jane knew that it was wrong to wish harm to befall on her ex, all the verses she knew taught her to treat others the way she would like to be treated, regardless her dislike for them. "Look at me Lina, look at how easily I distanced myself from the church the moment I came to London."

"Jane, just because you wished harm to strike Henry doesn't make you a sinner. Yes, we were taught to be honourable and seek peace. But we're all humans Jane, we're already born with the sin caused by Adam and Eve eons ago. In all honesty, no amount of praying and keeping ourselves free from whatever we consider sinful will prevent us from being sinners. We're first and foremost humans Jane, anything that we do is eventually just a way to convince ourselves that we're good people and make us feel better about our lives."

"But…"

"But nothing Jane. What makes us a good person is the intentions behind our actions, our faith is really just there to guide us, to guide us on a path that brings peace to others and ourselves. If all of us are following the teachings so closely, why are there reports of popes raping altar boys on the news? Aren't they our role models, examples that we should strive to be in order to receive forgiveness in God's eyes? Does it mean that we should follow their examples and rape every kid we see then?"

Catalina wondered why did Jane admit such a thing to her, and why she saw herself as someone who strayed from her faith. Catalina had always assumed that Jane didn't waver when it came to her faith, even though some of the things she did were rather unbecoming for a typical religious woman. She dismissed the thought, like what she had just said, Jane was human and humans were bound to err.

Jane briefly glanced in Catalina's direction, and the latter was taken aback by how foggy her friend's grey eyes were. They were clouded with doubt, and possibly self-loathing. Catalina knew that Jane's guard was usually up around most people, and only let it down when it came to Katherine, who had her own troubles. She started to put the pieces together, forming the theory that Jane could relax around Katherine because she had her own fair share of troubles, and not the kind Catalina could easily relate to.

"... Jane, is there… is there something deeper to this?" Catalina knew she had to tread carefully, that one wrong step could shatter their friendship, possibly rendering it beyond repair. Jane sighed, nodding stiffly at her friend's question. "Do you… want to talk about it?"

"I'm just running away Lina. All that talk about straying and what not, they're just to hide my deepest fears. They're just to protect me, to convince myself that I'm okay when I'm not. I don't even know what I'm saying anymore, I'm just… I'm just saying whatever's on my mind and I just want to stop thinking about everything because nothing I do reflects what I'm thinking and I just…"

 _'Is Jane implying that she's been stressed lately? Is that why her words aren't flowing in a connected manner?'_ Catalina had a deep frown as she theorised on why Jane's thoughts weren't aligning with what she said. Jane stopped, laughing erratically which snapped Catalina out from her thoughts. "J-Jane?! Are you alright?"

"No Lina, I don't think I've been for a while."

"Why do you say that?"

"... I've always thought that I can change, that I won't end up like you or, heavens forbid, like Cathy! But all I did was to change the backdrop, the numbers of years I've spent on this plane increased. I'm still the same girl I was back in Salisbury, I'm still that broken doll who has sinned far too much for others to accept me."

Jane stopped, wryly smiling to herself as she straightened her posture, and Catalina saw the woman behind the Jane she knew. The real Jane, who was tired and loathed herself over something that was still lost on Catalina. The real Jane, who was disorganised and a contrast from the orderly roommate she thought she knew. The real Jane, who couldn't keep her words straight and left only hints for Catalina to guess, to ponder about, to worry. Catalina wondered why _her_ , and not Katherine. She would always be there to support her friend, that was true, but she couldn't help feeling that she was way out of her depth when it came to whatever was on Jane's mind.

She recalled a message Catherine had sent recently, about how Jane looked like she had her life intact but was really dying on the inside. Catalina was horrified at that eerily accurate message, right now all she saw was a woman who desperately tried to keep her life together but was falling apart at the seams, and that hurt her.

"Jane, I-"

"Forgive me, I didn't know what came over me." Jane brushed their conversation aside, mustering a bright smile on her face as she faced Catalina, who was still horrified by her realisation. "I'll be popping by a 7-Eleven outlet on my way out, do you need me to get you anything? Perhaps some microwavable meals?"

"Jane, wait-" Jane ignored her and left, leaving Catalina alone in the dreary house. Since when was Jane's house so bleak, she thought. She had read from somewhere that the owner's house said a lot about their personality, and given Jane's preference for minimalism and white wallpaper, she was worried that it was a sign that Jane wasn't as fine as she wanted everyone to believe. She wondered what was it that prompted the troubling conversation, was it sprung upon her or was it something that was carefully ticking away, waiting for the right moment to explode. _'Kat. She probably knows better than me. She's been hanging out with Jane after all, surely she knows how to deal with this better than me.'_

* * *

**[Mentally Dead]**

_**[4.50 PM]** _

**Mentally Dead:** Kat, can we talk?

 **katsitter:** sure!

 **katsitter:** is it abt cuz n how ur in looooooove with her???

 **Mentally Dead:** Sorry Kat, I'm here for a serious conversation

 **Mentally Dead:** It's about Jane

 **katsitter:** wht happened to her?

 **Mentally Dead:** I know that you're the best secret keeper and that you won't tell others about the shit they went through no matter what

 **Mentally Dead:** But please tell me, is Jane actually okay?

 **Mentally Dead:** We had this talk about religion and it started off normal enough

 **Mentally Dead:** Then things took a serious turn

 **katsitter:** oh no did u two get into a fite abt religion

 **Mentally Dead:** That's the thing, we didn't!

 **Mentally Dead:** She talked about straying from our faith, then talked about how she's a sinner because she wanted Henry to be hurt, then implied that her faith was superficial at best, then she looked like she hated herself, then she admitted that all her thoughts about straying was just to protect herself because she knows that she's not okay and she's only running away, then her words and thoughts don't match, and she said that she thought she could change and didn't want to end up like me or Catherine and said something about being a broken doll, and she looked so so tired like she was just done with everything and implied that the real her wasn't what I knew and she left for a 7Eleven and pretended nothing happened!

 **Mentally Dead:** Please Kat, I know you don't tell secrets that aren't yours to share, but I really need to know if she's okay

 **katsitter:**...i dun think she is

 **katsitter:** im srs when i say tht i dun know why

 **katsitter:** but shes def not ok

 **katsitter:** shes never said whtever u said just now

 **katsitter:** or maybe she did but i was too dumb to get it

 **Mentally Dead:** Is this… like a recent thing?

 **katsitter:**...depends on ur definition

 **Mentally Dead:** Maybe like the past month?

 **katsitter:** oh then def not

 **katsitter:** wont tell u when as i legit dun kno but i can tell u tht her thots r usually clean

 **Mentally Dead:** … I'm sorry Kat for asking you of this, when did you find out?

 **katsitter:** while waiting for u during ur bd party

 **katsitter:** again wont go into details

 **Mentally Dead:** You're not dumb by the way

 **Mentally Dead:** You've found out more about her in a few months while I still don't know much about her after a few years

 **Mentally Dead:** Can I come over? I think I need someone to talk to...

 **Mentally Dead:** Is Catherine still over at your place?

 **katsitter:** yep shes almost done making a sorry card for jane

 **katsitter:** do u want me to take a pic of it?

 **Mentally Dead:** I'm good, I'm about to reach your place

 **Mentally Dead:** Do you think Catherine knows?

 **katsitter:** doubt it

 **Mentally Dead:** I see… I'm sorry that I made you tell me all those…

 **katsitter:** its fine i guess

 **katsitter:** like wht my therapist said sometimes u need intervention to help u move on

 **katsitter:** tho this might not be it

 **Mentally Dead:** I've just alighted, I'll be up in a few minutes

 **katsitter:** k see u soon

* * *

"Oh, hey Anna. Not every time I get to see you coming out of class." Anne greeted as she witnessed her roommate coming out from the lecture hall next to hers. The latter grinned, briskly making her way to Anne. "So how's Catherine? Are you missing her because you have a lecture scheduled at the last minute like me?"

"Cathy's great! I think we might've something there, but I'm not sure if it's too early to consider it romantic. And yeah, I miss her even though I see her almost every day!" Anna blushed, she enjoyed Catherine's company even before they introduced themselves to each other, and she loved hanging out with the English major. She loved learning tidbits about Catherine from the woman herself, and while she knew that she wasn't the only one privy to her life, the way she talked about them made Anna feel special. "Enough about me, let's talk about you!"

"Me?!" Anne scoffed, she had been nothing but an open book to all her friends, and was _very_ obvious about it. "I'm pretty transparent!"

"Not transparent enough regarding Catalina! C'mon, spill some tea!" Anna nudged Anne, the latter rolling her eyes before giving her roommate a reluctant smile. "Pleeeeeease?"

"Okay okay, fine! Cat and I are…" Anna's big brown eyes sparkled with interest, leaning in with excitement as she waited for Anne to finish. "... pretty chummy with each other."

"That's it? C'mon, do you fancy her or not?! I literally poured out my heart to you!"

"Girl, _everyone_ knows that you fancy Catherine. Well, maybe not the woman herself but yeah it's totes obvious." Anne giggled, elbowing Anna in the ribs. Anna winced in pain, sheepishly grinning away seconds later. "Anyways, whether I fancy her or not it's not really the concern here. I'm more interested about Kitty's."

"You wanted to throttle Jane for being paired up with Kat!

"I said that I'll fight her _if_ she fucks things up with Kitty!"

"Same difference, you practically strangled her after she stole King Micronoodle from you!" Anna exclaimed, both of them erupting in raucous laughter shortly after. As they weren't looking, Anna had accidentally bumped against someone else. "Whoops, sorry- oh c'mon of all people…"

"Tch, just my luck." Towering both of them was a muscular auburn-haired man that the two women barely recognised due to his previous obesity, his unkempt beard giving him a rugged look. His piercing blue eyes glared daggers at his two exes, a sentiment that was gladly mirrored by them. "Get outta my way."

"Don't trip on your way out fuckface." Anne sneered, angering the man. Anna groaned, as much as she shared a mutual hatred towards their ex, she wished that Anne wouldn't go out of her way to pick a fight with him. That had deadly consequences, which they experienced first hand the one night they accidentally left their door unlocked. "I see that you're into the fratboy look, how's the old nag? I'm sure Katherine's being a royal bitch in your arse."

"Keep your fucking nose outta my affairs." Henry growled, an effort on his part to remain civil with his feisty ex. He dearly wanted to kill her, but he was warned that should it be discovered that Anne was murdered by his hand, not even his influential family could stop the judge from handing down a life sentence. It was already hard enough to placate the Boleyns from slitting their second daughter's neck, and Henry didn't want to be on the receiving end of another lecture.

"Bit hard to do so when it's all on the school gossip page, don't you think so _love_?"

"Don't you call me that, know your place _whore_."

"Anne, let's just go." Anna sighed, tensions were flaring up and if she didn't put a stop to it soon, one of them would certainly end up dead. Anne scowled, flipping Henry off before stalking off without Anna. "... Stay away from my friends."

"Hmph." Henry growled, watching Anna running after Anne before stomping off himself. He wouldn't admit it, but he liked Anna the most despite her appearance. They had what people would describe as a fragile acquaintanceship thanks to their families, they would occasionally talk, though usually out of reluctance. Regardless how he felt about his fourth ex, he wasn't going to budge on forgiving any of his exes, especially his fifth one for flirting with other men despite being in a relationship with him. _'Fucking ruined my day, now where the hell is that damned Willoughby?'_

* * *

"I swear to god Anna, I _will_ burn his house down one day." Anna nodded wearily, this was the umpteenth time she had heard Anne threatening to destroy all of Henry's material possessions. They entered the nearest 7-Eleven outlet to their school, which was the one Jane was at as she consumed her slushie. "Janey! Fancy seeing you here."

"Oh, hello. I heard you screaming about burning someone's house down?" Jane asked, a slight smile on her face. She was still drained from her outburst earlier, but she didn't want to show it. "I hope it's simply a joke made in jest."

"Please, this is Henry we're talking about here. Burning down his house is considered tame." Anne dismissed Jane's concerns and grabbed a cup off the shelves, motioning for Jane to move aside so that she could access the slushie machine. "There's cola and pink lemonade… Eh, fuck it. Let's just mix 'em."

"Won't that taste weird?" Anna asked, she wasn't the type to mix drinks if given the opportunity. Jane shook her head, extolling the virtues of mixing drinks together to Anna, who was surprised by the former's passionate argument. She ended off with how the unknown was sometimes worth taking risks for, while Anne scoffed at the ending. "Oh c'mon Anne, she makes a pretty good point!"

"You sure you just don't understand half of it?"

"I can feel her passion! Though Jane, I didn't take you to be the type who likes slushies."

"... They have a lot of flavours."

"Ja, there was one time Anne went on a slushie rampage and tried to add all sorts of flavours into her cup. First time I saw someone adding drinks from the Gulp section into her slushie."

"It gives the slushie more flavour and you know it!" Anne retorted, proceeding to make her way to the Gulp section, where she planned to fill her cup with one of the drinks available. "Janey, should I go with Mountain Dew or orange soda?"

"I suppose whatever you want?" Jane didn't want to voice out that she would rather not have Anne adding liquids into her slushie, but she didn't want to start a commotion in the 7-Eleven outlet. Anna sighed loudly while Anne held up her slushie cup triumphantly, pleased with herself for mixing all the drinks she wanted. They made their way to the cashier to pay for Anne's drink, while Jane hung back to collect her thoughts. _'First things first, apologise to Lina for that outburst and ramblings. Afterwards…'_

"Hey Janey! We're gonna go back home, you wanna tag along with us or what?" Anne called out, bringing Jane out from her thoughts. She briefly considered it, and nodded in reply. She knew that if she returned home, Catalina would be waiting for her and would ask many questions. Or maybe none at all, but she knew her longest friend better than that. "Alright! First stop, Henry's place!"

"Girl, you better be joking 'bout burning his place to ashes!"

* * *

"... A little bit of this… and there." Catalina muttered to herself as she poured in a bit of vodka into her lemonade, hoping to make herself intoxicated enough to not obsess over the conversation she had with Jane so much. Catherine was still in the midst of designing her apology card, which consisted of mainly debating between which glitter to use. Katherine said nothing as she watched Catalina consume her drink. "Okay okay, I know I should have a clear head later. But really, I need something to take off the edge."

"I wasn't judging you Lin-Lin. I was just thinking about what Jane said to you, that's all." Katherine replied, trying to connect what she knew about Jane with what Catalina was told. All she could come up with was that something terrible had happened to Jane back in Salisbury, most likely in school and that what her faith taught her to believe worsened it. What mystified her was the similarity Catalina and Catherine shared that scared Jane, noting that Catherine was considered a worst case scenario.

"... What should I do later? Should I even do anything?"

"I don't know Lin-Lin, you know I'll always give them space. Think about what you think is right and not what others think." Katherine advised, wondering if her strategy was working out well for her. So far, Jane didn't react badly and in fact told her pieces of her past that she was sure not even Catalina knew about. Yet, Katherine felt that she was allowing Jane to retreat away from help, that Katherine was indirectly enabling her unhealthy habits. "Do you want to make a card for her? You can always make one for Anne while you're at it."

"Ha, trust you to link the conversation back to Bo. If I didn't know any better, I would say that you're trying to set me up with your cousin."

"Sometimes, avoiding the subject altogether is the best solution." They said nothing for a while, letting silence sink in until it was an opportune moment. "Do you fancy her?"

"I don't know Kat, I don't particularly feel in the mood to sort out my feelings for her. It's not exactly love, but neither is it mere friendship. It's just…"

"Complicated?"

"Exactly. Sure, she's stubborn as hell when it comes to things, and she's not the most polite or elegant woman you could find, but Bo's loyal as hell if you're in her good books. Not to mention that she's pretty selfless and a total softie at heart, even though she refuses to allow herself to be vulnerable around others. And you can't help but admire how observant she can be at times, I swear, she has the ability to make people feel special or sweatier during an interrogation."

"Her body's a bonus then?"

"Ha! Definitely! I mean… something about the way she carries herself draws my attention, I usually just chalk it up to good posture." Katherine smirked, annoying her friend. Catalina scowled, she knew what the younger woman was about to say and she wasn't having any of it. "Oh no, no way. No way. I'm not in love with her. No fucking way Kat. No no no way."

"I never said a single thing! But I _do_ know of a way to assure yourself that you're not in love with her!"

"Oh, that's actually very-"

"Go on a date with her on Valentine's Day!" Catalina made a face, amusing Katherine. She coughed, clearing her throat to explain in full. "Okay but think about it, if you're able to remain platonic with her on the most romantic day of the year, you _know_ it means that you need to accept Anne as your newest best friend!"

"... Actually, that does make sense. Not how I would go about it, but it's worth a try."

"Really?! I mean, that's the spirit!" The door opened, signalling the return of either Anne or Anna, possibly both. Katherine was ready to welcome her roommates, but stopped upon realising that Jane had accompanied them, her eyes clouded with uncertainty. "Jane! Did they do something?"

"Stop assuming that we did something!" Anne protested, but neither her cousin nor Catalina believed her. Anna snickered, even though she was also falsely accused of being up to no good. "Anna, Kitty just accused you too."

"Only because I'm associated with you!"

"Why you-!"

"Pardon me, but I doubt the doorway is the best place to have a squabble?" Jane intervened, firmly pushing the two women inside their apartment with a smile on her face. Jane didn't expect Catalina to be over at Katherine's place, she was hoping that the Psychology major was still at her house, contemplating what she should do. "Lina, you're… here."

"Seymour! I've done it, here." Catherine had interrupted them, a deliberate action on her part. She had been eavesdropping on Catalina's and Katherine's previous conversation, and while she was also at a loss for words regarding Jane, she knew that all of them wanted to avoid awkwardness in front of their other friends. "An apology card for the Holbein incident."

"Oh c'mon, you're a goodie two shoes." Anne jeered, earning herself a playful smack to the head courtesy of Anna. Jane took the card, examining the drawing on the card. It contained a smiling drawing of her and Catherine, with a small fire near them. Inside the card contained a heartfelt apology from Catherine, who did her best to make it as short as possible but only managed to limit herself to one page. "Hold up, where the fuck did the glitter come from?"

"Cathy and I went out to buy some! There was a sale too so we got quite a few colours!"

"Cat! New plan, we glitter the fuck outta Henry's place!" Anne declared, grabbing a box of glitter and dragging Catalina to her room, possibly to hatch a new plot to ruin Henry's house. Anna approached Catherine, mumbling something in her ear which prompted Catherine to follow her to her bedroom. That left Katherine and Jane alone in the living room, an uncomfortable silence between them.

"... Was it me, or did I hear Anna mention something about fan fiction she had written?" Jane was the one to break the silence, which was accompanied with soft giggling from the younger woman. "Looks like it's just us two."

"Mmhm, I convinced Lin-Lin to bring Anne out on a date on Valentine's. If everything turns out well, Araleyn will be canon!"

"Cathy's rubbing off you I see." Jane commented, earning herself a shrug from Katherine. The latter eyed her with concern, and Jane immediately knew why. "... Lina consulted you about me?"

"Yeah, and I… told her some things that you wanted to keep private. I'm really sorry Jane."

"What things?"

"Just… just that I know that there's something troubling you for quite a while now." Katherine looked away, playing with her sleeve as she tried to calm herself down. Jane gave a subtle nod that went unnoticed by her, and continued to play with her sleeves. "I didn't tell her that you're addicted to slushies, or your loneliness, or your-"

"Lonely? I don't believe that I've ever given off that impression." Jane frowned, she doubted that she was ever lonely. She was surrounded by people throughout her life, her family back in Salisbury and her friends in London. Katherine smiled sadly, placing a shaky hand on her shoulder. Jane could feel herself wanting to step away, the hammering in her chest upon Katherine's touch served little comfort and instead intensified her worries. And yet she didn't, she allowed Katherine to touch her, and she prayed that the younger woman couldn't see through her.

"You've never phrased it as such… but the tone you used, you sounded lonely."

"Katherine, I've been blessed with nine siblings and two loving parents. When I came to London, I've been blessed with all of you… and Anne I suppose."

"... But you couldn't be yourself around your family, could you? You've played the role of the doting sister who didn't let anything get her down, and you've played the role of the sweet-natured friend who dotes on us that does her best to keep us out of trouble." Katherine wasn't sure if she should be saying so much, especially without thinking. She was going against her personal rule to not pry into the personal matters of others, but she knew that what she was doing was right… just that Jane might not forgive her afterwards. "But… they're not who you really are, are they?"

"... Katherine, I don't know who I am anymore. I can't call myself a religious person because if I am, I wouldn't be distancing myself from my faith so easily. Neither can I call myself liberal when I still can't get over how some women… _explore_ their sexuality so freely. I can't say that I'm a selfless person when everything I've done so far is just an attention grab, yet I can't say that I'm an attention seeker when I rather hide behind the scenes. So what am I? _Who_ am I? I don't know Katherine, I really don't know. All I know is that I don't want to be Plain Jane again."

"You said that your lack of presence was complemented by your ability to study."

"I said that just to convince myself that I had something good going for me, that there's something I'm good at. But no, I'm just Plain Jane. I'm just a talentless girl who licked the boots of others only to get beaten up in the courtyard every day." Jane forced out a laugh, tears starting to flow from her eyes. She sobbed, she didn't want to remember the pain inflicted from her schoolmates, she didn't want to remember how she had to hide them from her family lest they found out and started questioning her. "Normalcy is the only thing that I have left Katherine, it's the only thing that I know."

"... It's gonna be okay Jane. It's gonna be okay." Katherine knew that Jane was nowhere near okay, but all she could do was to wrap her in a hug and whisper hollow assurances. That was all she could do, and that was the only thing she could do for now.

* * *

**[protect the babies squad]**

_**[6.35 PM]** _

**Regrets &Coffee: **Well that took a serious turn…

 **that boleyn girl:** yea

 **that boleyn girl:** i didnt kno tht janeys fucked up

 **KweenCleves:** is it rlly rite of us to be eavesdropping on them????

 **Mentally Dead:** Ethically, no

 **Mentally Dead:** Friendship wise, it's a grey area

 **Regrets &Coffee: **But like… I didn't know Seymour had her own troubles.

 **Regrets &Coffee: **I mean, bullying?

 **Regrets &Coffee: **I never thought Seymour of all people would get bullied.

 **that boleyn girl:** i dun think any of us wld kno if she didnt say a word

 **that boleyn girl:** also cat knew abt this???

 **Mentally Dead:** It's complicated!

 **Mentally Dead:** But yes, she told me about this while Catherine was out making that apology card

 **Mentally Dead:** Her cross started the whole… unravelling?

 **Regrets &Coffee: **Actually what did she tell you? I could probably decipher it.

 **that boleyn girl:** u??

 **that boleyn girl:** no offence but srsly????

 **KweenCleves:** tbf shes an english major

 **KweenCleves:** tho it sounds rlly personal…

 **Mentally Dead:** I'm personally of the opinion that we should at least know about it

 **Mentally Dead:** It's not our right to interfere with what she wants to do, but we should at least provide her with options if she wants it

 **Mentally Dead:** Or needs it, but she can be stubborn

 **that boleyn girl:** i guess it probs cant be worse…

 **Mentally Dead:** I'll just copy whatever I sent Kat earlier

 **Mentally Dead:** She talked about straying from our faith, then talked about how she's a sinner because she wanted Henry to be hurt, then implied that her faith was superficial at best, then she looked like she hated herself, then she admitted that all her thoughts about straying was just to protect herself because she knows that she's not okay and she's only running away, then her words and thoughts don't match, and she said that she thought she could change and didn't want to end up like me or Catherine and said something about being a broken doll, and she looked so so tired like she was just done with everything and implied that the real her wasn't what I knew and she left for a 7Eleven and pretended nothing happened!

 **KweenCleves:** oof shes going thru a rought time

 **that boleyn girl:** damn i wld probs panic like wht happened with kitty

 **Mentally Dead:** I wonder if there was anything I could do even before this

 **Mentally Dead:** Is it my fault that I didn't see the signs?

 **Regrets &Coffee: **She hid it well, don't blame yourself Aragón.

 **Regrets &Coffee: **Also, while I need more time to provide a satisfying theory to most of Seymour's rant, I managed to infer a fraction of the text Aragón sent.

 **KweenCleves:** which is?????

 **Regrets &Coffee: **She's in denial over her sexuality.

 **Regrets &Coffee: **Like, super in denial over her sexuality.

 **Mentally Dead:** Is it me or does Catherine have some sort of obsession over Jane's sexuality

 **KweenCleves:** wouldnt tht be anne?

 **that boleyn girl:** yea yea shes idgafsexual

 **that boleyn girl:** back to translation

 **that boleyn girl:** give us a better example srsly

 **Regrets &Coffee: **Pretend you and Aragón are back in Tudor times, you are her lady-in-waiting.

 **Regrets &Coffee: **She needs help getting out of her fancy dresses, and you oblige because it's your job.

 **Regrets &Coffee: **While doing so your fingers brushed against hers, and she felt a jolt of pleasure that she had never felt with Henry before.

 **Regrets &Coffee: **Afterwards you proceed to flirt with her but makes it vague between real flirting and political flirting.

 **that boleyn girl:** ngl i might flirt with cougars if it was the first wife

 **that boleyn girl:** like hello??? the queen was a fucking boss n thts sexy af

 **Mentally Dead:** That makes it even more concerning, but knowing you, you might ACTUALLY thrive

 **Regrets &Coffee: **Back to my example please.

 **Mentally** **Dead:** Sorry

 **Regrets &Coffee: **Aragón is confused over how she finds you sexually attractive and doesn't understand your flirtations.

 **Mentally Dead:** Okay that's highly possible for me back then

 **KweenCleves:** love how u refer to urself as tho ur a reicnation

 **Regrets &Coffee: **But because homosexuality was a sin back then and Aragón was super religious, she denies that she sort of likes you and attributes it to a grudging friendship.

 **Regrets &Coffee: **Bonus points if Boleyn is actually into her but you know, Tudor times.

 **Regrets &Coffee: **Now multiply that feeling by 100 and throw Seymour's pushover tendencies to the mix, that's what's happening here.

 **Mentally Dead:** You could've just said that it's basically a forbidden love set in Victorian time

 **Regrets &Coffee: **That's because the forbidden-ish feeling is closer to times way before the Victorian era.

 **Regrets &Coffee: **And faith is everything back then.

 **Regrets &Coffee: **If what I said is true, that would actually explain the reaction she gave me back when I asked if she was my blind date.

 **KweenCleves:** so foreshadowing then

 **Mentally Dead:** Are we still shipping them together then?

 **Mentally Dead:** It doesn't sound appropriate now

 **that boleyn girl:** appropiteannes aside

 **that boleyn girl:** kitty really really likes janey

 **that boleyn girl:** leik fancy kinda like

 **KweenCleves:** they cld hv a strong friendship going

 **KweenCleves:** like wht she wants in her song

 **Mentally Dead:** Honestly? Friendship is a form of chemistry, just not the type where two molecules get together and form covalent bonds or something

 **Regrets &Coffee: **I'm more worried about how we should act around Seymour now.

 **Regrets &Coffee: **I'm pretty sure she's aware that we're eavesdropping…

 **Mentally Dead:** Just act normally, we don't mention it unless she brings it up or the situation forces us to

 **Mentally Dead:** …I didn't learn psychology for years only to clam up when my best friend is going through shit like this

 **that boleyn girl:** for me i think they need to take a few steps back n look at it objectijly

 **that boleyn girl:** hell if they need to do smth else to take their minds off it until theyr clear in mind then why tf not

 **KweenCleves:** i wish i cld help jane more…

 **KweenCleves:** i dun kno her for tht long but she dun deserve whtever happened in the past

 **Regrets &Coffee: **We all wish we could help her more, but ultimately only she can help herself.

 **Regrets &Coffee: **If she doesn't want help or to help herself, then we have no choice but to respect her decision.

 **that boleyn girl:** imma leave now

 **that boleyn girl:** i hv a pillow calling out to me

 **KweenCleves:** omg same

 **KweenCleves:** well not rlly but i wanna test out my mini planetarum

 **KweenCleves:** fuck physics rite lol

 **Mentally Dead:** You should go study…

 **KweenCleves:** loooooool im my own person bitch

 **KweenCleves:** cathy help me set it up

 **Regrets &Coffee: **Sure, and Aragón?

 **Mentally Dead:** Yeah?

 **Regrets &Coffee: **Continue being Seymour's best friend, clearly she trusts you.

 **Mentally Dead:** You don't have to tell me twice

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> 1\. What purpose does religion really serve in Jane's life? Explain your answer.
> 
> 2\. Jane mentions two sides of her in this chapter. Is it possible for both sides to reconcile? Why or why not?
> 
> 3\. Is it okay to reveal something someone has trusted you with if you know that their life is in danger? Why or why not?
> 
> 4\. Is Anne's plans for April's Fools considered taking things too far? Why or why not?
> 
> 5\. Catalina says that as friends, they should at least know what Jane's going through. Do you agree with her sentiment? Why or why not?
> 
> 6\. Should everyone sans Jane and Katherine continue to ship said friends together even after having suspicions towards Jane's mental state? Why or why not?


	12. Chapter 12

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> As mentioned in Chapter 1, Jane, Anne and Katherine are all related to each other in this story and there might be questions at the end of each questions for you to think/reflect on. Basically similar to Literature books.

"Fucking shit, we're all out of vodka." Anne swore, slamming the refrigerator door close. Katherine winced, all she wanted was a quiet night in while she reviewed a video capturing her mock performance earlier. Her drama lecturer had noted out numerous mistakes in her performance, and she had only a few days to correct it. "Don't you have lessons?"

"Nope, it became a mock practical test and I was one of the first few to perform." Anne whistled in reply as she opened the refrigerator door once more, her brown eyes sparkling as she located a can of cola hidden behind numerous boxes of leftovers from Jane. "Doing anything for Valentine's?"

"Kitty, we're only in the middle of January. That's like, next month." Anne opened the can with a satisfying hiss, gulping down the cola like a thirsty dog who was given a bowl of water after a few days. She sighed with relief, the carbonated liquid providing much needed relief to her throat. "But yeah, Cat invited me out on that day. Said something 'bout how it's important to her and that she didn't need me to one up her."

"One up her? How are you even going to do that?"

"Ha! Please, there are so many ways to do so! For example, complimenting on her outfit, entangling my fingers in her fluffy hair, occasional hand brushing, hand squeezes in tight crowds, the possibilities are endless!"

"... Anne, that just sounds like you fancy her. Like seriously, just get married or something." Katherine idly replied, more focused about her graded performance. If she didn't show some vulnerability like what her character was supposed to do during her scene, she foresaw that her grades would be vulnerable to some harsh words and a dismal grade. "Did Lin-Lin mention where she's bringing you?"

"Nope, and I… I'm only telling you this because you're my cousin, but I think I'm ready."

"You're always ready to strip in front of people, what the fuck are you talking about here?"

"I meant to let her in!"

"You let her in every other day Anne! Don't think that I don't know that she's been topping you for a while now!"

"For fuck's sake Kitty, I meant emotionally! I'm gonna… I'm gonna let my guard down a bit, and allow myself to be slightly more vulnerable with her."

"Wow cuz way to go, what a big improvement there."

"I didn't tell you all this shit just for you to be a sarcastic little bitch!" Katherine rolled her eyes, slow clapping for her cousin to see. " _Now_ you're doing this on purpose."

"Obviously. But really, that's an improvement. I'm glad that you're willing to place more trust in Lin-Lin, not that you don't honestly but whatever." Katherine replied, a faint smile on her face as she paused her video, her pink eyes sparkling with sincere support for her cousin. Anne grumbled in reply, hiding her gratitude behind an annoyed mask. "Oh by the way Anne, which one sounds better, a portable alarm or a weapon?"

"Why?"

"It's just me, but I _think_ someone's watching me. I know I'm just paranoid since I'm really fit, tall, slutty and have bright pink hair but Jane really wants me to take some protective measures."

"Hold up, go back to the slut part." Katherine froze, she forgot that no one knew that she was sleeping around since there was no longer much point saving it for people she genuinely liked. "What the hell do you mean by that?"

"I meant that I _look_ slutty. Oh but don't worry, no one can out-slut you."

"Bitch, I'm in a committed sex thing with Cat. I haven't been sleeping around with random blokes, or ladies now that I think about it, for a good while now." Anne shrugged, satisfied with her cousin's explanation. Katherine breathed a sigh of relief, she didn't need to further worry Anne about her risky behaviours. "Anyways back to the protective measures, what does Janey think about it since she knows about it _before_ your cousin?"

"Her words say paranoia, her eyes say stalker."

"Yeah I'm gonna have to agree with her eyes, that's definitely a stalker. You should get both an alarm and a weapon. Actually, you shouldn't be going out if there's a stalker on the loose. Y'know what, I'll call Cat and ask her to cancel because until that stalker's caught-"

"Anne, _no_. Don't throw away your plans just for me. If it reassures you, I'll try to surround myself with people as much as possible, and if I know that both you and Anna aren't coming back, I'll ask Jane if I can stay with her. There's Lin-Lin and Cathy there too, so I'll be safe." Anne frowned, she felt that her cousin was being too lax when it concerned her safety, but she knew that there was no point pushing it. Not to mention that Katherine provided her with an action plan, so that was slightly reassuring. "It's probably just me being paranoid, I haven't done anything to warrant a stalker."

"... Okay, but I expect an update every half and hour in the ex-wives' group chat, regardless if you're at home or not or even if you're with any of us. I'll be liaising with them in case you decide to lie, not that you have any reason to lie at this point." Katherine nodded, she considered herself lucky that Anne was willing to compromise with her despite the possible danger. "Also, we need a code word to indicate that you're in danger."

"I can always just say something like 'bunny at home' to tell you that I'm at home and there's danger?" Anne nodded, easily satisfied with the suggestion. She didn't need another break-in like last time, and she would do her best to prevent it from happening again. "Do you have classes later?"

"I have one at 4.15 pm, it's annoying how I have classes so late in the afternoon." Anne replied, muttering swear words at the lecturer teaching that particular class. "You?"

"No, I _do_ have a graded performance in two days and if I don't nail my part, I'm looking at a B for this module. And I have to go memorise _another_ mono but I can relate to it so I'm fine on that end- oh by the way I'll be doing my second mono in June with my class."

"Oof, none of us do Theatre too. I would suggest Catherine but English and Theatre aren't exactly similar…"

"... I mean I actually do know one person who could help, but she's probs busy." Katherine trailed off, she wasn't sure if said person was willing to help her, given that she didn't make a perfect first impression when Jane fell sick. "Ah fuck it, I'll just call her."

"You do that, I'll go take a shower…" Anne was hesitant to leave her cousin alone in the living room, but Katherine gestured for her to leave her be. Sighing, Anne made her way to the bathroom. Once Anne was out of earshot, Katherine scrolled through her contact list until it reached the one she needed. She dialled the number, hoping that she was free.

 _"Don't tell me Jane's sick again! I swear, what are you feeding her?!"_ Katherine winced, while she wasn't surprised that the woman on the other end didn't trust her, she was taken aback by the swearing that followed. _"What kind of friends feed her slop from the fuc-"_

"Hi Dorothy! No, Jane's fine." Katherine could hear Dorothy breathing a sigh of relief on the other side of the phone call. Dorothy may not show it on her face, but it was obvious that she cared for Jane, even though the latter didn't see it. "I actually wanted to ask you for a favour?"

_"Is it related to my sister?"_

"Nope."

_"... Go on."_

"You mentioned the other day that you wanted to major in Theatre right? I… need help with criticism."

_"As in you want to learn how to suck it up or you want me to give feedback?"_

"The latter. I'm not particularly close to anyone in my major, and you're the only person whom I know that has a theatre background…"

_"Hmm… I'll need a video of whatever you want me to criticise. Is it a solo scene or…?"_

"Solo, it's my character's monologue. I'll send you the video over text?"

 _"Works for me, if there's nothing else I'm going to hang up. Bye, I guess."_ Dorothy ended the call, with Katherine proceeding to send the video to Dorothy. Anne stepped out of the bathroom, wearing absolutely nothing but a green towel loosely wrapped around her neck. Katherine grumbled, she hated it when her cousin refused to dry herself before exiting the bathroom.

"What? Nothing you've never seen before."

"At least dry yourself next time before you remind me of your sexiness." Katherine gestured to the floor, which was wet courtesy of her cousin. "Seriously cuz, stop it."

"But my sexiness increases when I'm soaking wet!"

"Urgh, you're impossible."

* * *

**[SAP]**

_**[4.30 PM]** _

**Regrets &Coffee: **I need both of your help.

 **Mentally Dead:** Sure, with what?

 **Regrets &Coffee: **How do I ask Anna out on a date on Valentine's without coming off as a tryhard?

 **Mentally Dead:** Oh for fuck's sake, shouldn't you ask either Bo or Kat this?

 **Regrets &Coffee: **Yeah, and risk either of them telling Anna?

 **Regrets &Coffee: **Anyways, you asked Boleyn out on a date right?

 **Regrets &Coffee: **How do I do that without Anna feeling pressured because it's on Valentine's?

 **Mentally Dead:** Just say that you want to hang out with her without us on that day?

 **Regrets &Coffee: **Is that what you said to Boleyn?

 **J.S.:** "Hey Bo, I'm going to take you out on a date on the most romantic day of the year and you better show or so help me I'll hijack your Insta account and post Anne's collar and add all the emojis you hate." - Lina.

 **Mentally Dead:** JESUS CHRIST JANE HOW THE FUCK DO YOU KNOW THAT?!

 **J.S.:** You asked me to hide in an empty classroom and be your moral support.

 **Mentally Dead:** Oh yeah, I forgot I asked

 **Regrets &Coffee: **I thought Seymour was attending class hence the late response.

 **J.S.:** I'm actually still in the middle of a lecture, I decided to take a short breather.

 **Regrets &Coffee: **Cool, do you have any ideas now that Aragón's a disaster bi?

 **Mentally Dead:** I'M NOT A DISASTER

 **J.S.:** "Anna, I like you very much and if you're willing, will you go out on a date with me on 14 February?"

 **Regrets &Coffee: **You need a certain level of confidence to pull that off Seymour.

 **Mentally Dead:** I know, if you send that to Kat, Catherine will send that to Anna

 **Regrets &Coffee: **I'M A DEPRESSO ESPRESSO, NOT A FUNCTIONING ESPRESSO.

 **Mentally Dead:** You can be depressed AND functioning

 **Mentally Dead:** Don't talk psychology with a Psych major

 **J.S.:** If it gives Cathy the boost she needs, I don't see any reason not to help!

 **Regrets &Coffee: **Won't Howard think that you're asking her out?

 **Mentally Dead:** Don't listen to her honey, it's just her nerves talking!

 **Regrets &Coffee: **FUCK YOU ARAGÓN.

**[katsitter]**

_**[4.36 PM]** _

**J.S.:** Katherine, I like you very much and if you're willing, will you go out on a date with me on 14 February?

 **katsitter:** awwwww ofc!!

 **katsitter:** wait did linlin set u up to do this

 **J.S.:** No?

 **katsitter:** nnnnnn ur aware of the implitions of wht u just asked??

 **J.S.:** Yes?

 **katsitter:** oooook sure but imma hv a chat with linlin ltr

 **J.S.:** Looking forward to it!

**[SAP]**

_**[4.40 PM]** _

**J.S.:** [sheagreed.jpg]

 **Regrets &Coffee: **ARE YOU SERIOUS?!

 **Mentally Dead:** Oh damn girl

 **J.S.:** Hope this helps Cathy!

 **J.S.:** ^^

 **Regrets &Coffee: **You two suck.

 **Mentally Dead:** Lol hold on

**[katsitter]**

_**[4.42 PM]** _

**katsitter:** ok why tf did jane ask me out on a date

 **katsitter:** dun get me wrong im totes flattered n looking forward to it

 **katsitter:** but i hv a feeling u set her up to do it

 **Mentally Dead:** Okay yes, I told Jane that if she sends that to you, Catherine will have to ask Anna out on a date on Valentine's

 **Mentally Dead:** But I was expecting her to make it sound platonic!

 **Mentally Dead:** I don't even know if she's asking you out in a gay way or in a BFF way

 **katsitter:** hold up cathys planning to ask anna out???

 **katsitter:** shldnt u update the blue n red chat???

 **Mentally Dead:** She asked me how in the group chat with me, her and Jane

 **Mentally Dead:** And before you say anything, your roommate group chat is way more chaotic

 **katsitter:** soooo do i hv to look up locations to visit on 14??

 **katsitter:** this is a gd time to take janes mind off things ngl

 **Mentally Dead:** I'll leave it up to you

 **katsitter:** wtf no help me pls

**[SAP]**

_**[4.53 PM]** _

**Mentally Dead:** Anyways I have another plan to make Catherine feel confident

 **Mentally Dead:** We do the Holbein dance to cheer you up

 **Regrets &Coffee: **Why would you lie and say that you have a plan?

 **Mentally Dead:** Do you want me to be your moral support?

 **Regrets &Coffee: **Are you going to out me like what Seymour did to you?

 **Mentally Dead:** Maybe

 **J.S.:** You can always ask Katherine to be your moral support!

 **Regrets &Coffee: **Out of all of us, you're the least likely to out me.

 **Regrets &Coffee: **But you just outed Aragón so… I think I'll fly solo.

 **Mentally Dead:** Get it girl!

 **J.S.:** Good luck!

 **J.S.:** If it fails, I'll buy you slushed ice from 7-Eleven!

 **Regrets &Coffee: **My friends are horrible people.

* * *

**[blue n red]**

_**[5.02 PM]** _

**Mentally Dead:** Catherine's going to ask Anna out

 **that boleyn girl:** lucky u said smth

 **that boleyn girl:** i was planning to steal annas phone n send her a message

 **that boleyn girl:** its so romantic too

 **katsitter:** didnt she change her password

 **that boleyn girl:** pffffft my face can still unlock it

 **J.S.:** At this point, I'm not going to condemn Anne.

 **that boleyn girl:** yasssss be gay n do crimes with meee

 **Mentally Dead:** I thought you're at least bi

 **that boleyn girl:** yea but like be bi n do crimes sounds fucking lame

 **that boleyn girl:** also im biromantic homdesixasjl

 **that boleyn girl:** smth like tht

 **J.S.:** Wait… what about your sexual encounters with men?

 **J.S.:** And Henry!

 **J.S.:** This is why I cry when I try reading up on LGBT+...

 **Mentally Dead:** You're doing great sweetie

 **Mentally Dead:** All I can tell is that Bo was messaging while stealing one of Kat's ice cream tubs and she found out and is now whooping the shit out of her

 **katsitter:** nah if she stole my ice cream ill just cry

 **katsitter:** if i had enough tears

 **katsitter:** anyways her spelling sucks

 **J.S.:** Should we watch their date from afar?

 **that boleyn girl:** lololol not when i hv a plan to oneup cat

 **Mentally Dead:** Ha! Like you can ever be more romantic than me!

 **katsitter:** r u srsly arguing abt whos more romantic…

 **katsitter:** oh btw jane

 **katsitter:** i hv some plans for valentines!

 **katsitter:** r there places u wanna go?

 **katsitter:** we can do everything!

 **that boleyn girl:** wait wtf is going on

 **Mentally Dead:** A certain blonde Romeo asked your cousin out on a date

 **katsitter:** i like to think of her as a juliet but yea!!!

 **that boleyn girl:** WHT

 **that boleyn girl:** ISTG

 **katsitter:** if u wanna threaten her can u at least do so by pm

 **that boleyn girl:** URGH FINE

**[J.S.]**

_**[5.15 PM]** _

**that boleyn girl:** did u srsly ask her out on a date????

 **J.S.:** Yes, mainly to give Cathy some encouragement.

 **J.S.:** Of course, it'll be nice to spend some time together with Katherine.

 **J.S.:** She's really a delight to be around, and… well she has been there for me through some harder times.

 **that boleyn girl:** n u literally asked her out on a date???

 **J.S.:** I fail to see your concern here?

 **that boleyn girl:** ur a homophobe who just asked my cuz whos a girl out on an intimate session on the most romantic date of the yr

 **that boleyn girl:** do u rlly not see wht impression u gave off???

 **J.S.:** … Oh dear.

 **J.S.:** I must have made Katherine uncomfortable…

 **J.S.:** Oh, but maybe she assumes that it's just a friendly gathering?

 **that boleyn girl:** i can assure u tht she sees it romantically

 **that boleyn girl:** whether or not she knos tht shes actually seeing it tht way is a diff q alteorgth

 **that boleyn girl:** so r u asking her out as frens or just…?

 **J.S.:** … I'll definitely show up on that day.

 **that boleyn girl:** ok u kno wht lets just talk

 **that boleyn girl:** r u in denial, straight or just being bitchy

 **J.S.:** Do we have to have this conversation now?

 **that boleyn girl:** YES

 **J.S.:** I'm simply fond of her, more so than my own family.

 **that boleyn girl:** u dun sound like ur close to them tho??

 **J.S.:** And you could at least pretend you didn't hear me breaking down a few days ago.

 **that boleyn girl:**...but u do kno tht we cld all hear?

 **J.S.:** Yes.

 **that boleyn girl:** just… just dun fuck this up? pls?

 **that boleyn girl:** kitty rlly has been going thru a lot of shit n i rlly dun wnat her heart to be broken again

 **that boleyn girl:** pls

 **that boleyn girl:** if u dun like her tht way make things clear

 **that boleyn girl:** dun string her along

 **J.S.:** It's hard to string her along when she's straight.

 **that boleyn girl:** gdi u dun need to be gay to get heartbroken

 **that boleyn girl:** n none of us r straight

 **that boleyn girl:** liek srsly no one

 **J.S.:** I appreciate this… threatening?

 **that boleyn girl:** yea yea make sure to think abt it srsly

 **that boleyn girl:** oh n sexualitys fluid so yea dun think too much abt it

 **that boleyn girl:** or do think a lot abt it n fuck urself over in the head

 **J.S.:** Sometimes I wonder why I try being friends with you.

 **J.S.:** Then I remember that I'm doing this for Katherine and by extension Lina.

 **J.S.:** You don't deserve Lina by the way.

 **that boleyn girl:** look up better burns then we talk

**[blue n red]**

_**[5.24 PM]** _

**Mentally Dead:** I bet Bo's dead

 **katsitter:** nah shes still alive

 **katsitter:** she just yeeted her phone at me

 **that boleyn girl:** i did not

 **that boleyn girl:** i was just making a point to janey

 **J.S.:** Throwing your phone at your cousin is certainly not how I would go about "look up better burns then we talk".

 **Mentally Dead:** Where were we?

 **katsitter:** cuz needing a new phone at the rate she yeets shit?

 **J.S.:** Cathy and Anna are going out on a date soon?

 **Mentally Dead:** Thanks Jane, exactly

 **Mentally Dead:** Soon, both colours will combine to form a nice purple

 **katsitter:** ooh i like purple too

 **that boleyn girl:** green is more superior n its canon

 **J.S.:** As what Cathy had taught me the other day, I'll be slowly yeeting myself out.

 **J.S.:** I'm not sure why a word used to mean throwing something can be used to leave a conversation though.

 **that boleyn girl:** i love how tht hipsters the most chaotic one

 **Mentally Dead:** I have half the mind to blame you for that but honestly, agreed

* * *

**[henry viii's ex-wives]**

_**[8.00 PM]** _

**katsitter:** i need advice

 **KweenCleves:** on how to dispose a body?

 **Regrets &Coffee: **MY TIME AS A WRITER IS FINALLY GOING TO BE APPLIED IN REAL LIFE!

 **that boleyn girl:** is it how to bdsm someone so tht they wont kno ur leaving bc theyr gross af?

 **Mentally Dead:** What the hell is wrong with you three?!

 **Mentally Dead:** Especially you Catherine, what happened to only writing romance fiction?

 **J.S.:** How to prepare the most romantic day for your cousin without involving crime?

 **Mentally Dead:** JANE NO DON'T SINK TO THEIR LEVEL

 **katsitter:** ill leave the planning for lina but no to all of them

 **katsitter:** wht shld i use to protect myself

 **that boleyn girl:** heels

 **KweenCleves:** well manicured nails

 **Regrets &Coffee: **A thick book.

 **Mentally Dead:** Shouldn't you all ask for the context first?!

 **katsitter:** cmon humour me first

 **Mentally Dead:** … I guess a wine bottle

 **J.S.:** Letter opener.

 **katsitter:** context is to assure anne in case code black happens again

 **KweenCleves:** oh then def janes idea

 **Mentally Dead:** You can use Catherine's thermos

 **Regrets &Coffee: **Am I the only one who doesn't know what Code Black is?

 **J.S.:** I don't but letter openers are great weapons.

 **J.S.:** They're mini knives that can be used to stab someone.

 **Regrets &Coffee: **And… how do you know this?

 **J.S.:** One of my lungs punctured after a classmate stabbed me with a letter opener.

 **J.S.:** To be fair, I stabbed him back in the eye.

 **J.S.:** And no, I wasn't charged because it was self-defence.

 **KweenCleves:** damn

 **Mentally Dead:** Wait, is this part of the heart-to-heart talk you had with Kat that we're all supposed to pretend to not hear?

 **J.S.:** I mean, there's not much reason to hide it now that all of you heard it.

 **that boleyn girl:** wait then why tf did u ask me to pretend to not hear it earlier?

 **J.S.:** I was asking you to have some tact.

 **Mentally Dead:** That's something Bo definitely won't have in her lifetime

 **Regrets &Coffee: **At least now you know what to give Howard on Valentine's.

 **KweenCleves:** im confused so r we supposed to delete everything we heard or to rmb them

 **katsitter:** anna can i borrow ur credit card

 **KweenCleves:** ofc!

 **KweenCleves:** wait why

 **that boleyn girl:** i love how u hv a delayed reaction

 **katsitter:** im buying all of us friendship alarms

 **katsitter:** in case we r in trouble!

 **KweenCleves:** ooh ok but why my card

 **katsitter:** oh wait my bad i meant amazon account

 **katsitter:** u get a discount so its cheaper

 **Regrets &Coffee: **Wow, that's interesting to know.

 **Mentally Dead:** So… you're NOT using Anna's card?

 **katsitter:** no!

 **katsitter:** im using annes

 **that boleyn girl:** bitch wht

 **KweenCleves:** lmaoooo

 **that boleyn girl:** fuck

 **that boleyn girl:** tht bitch stole my wallet!!!

 **that boleyn girl:** open the fuck up kitty!!!!!!!

 **KweenCleves:** cue anne banging on kats door

 **J.S.:** She probably doesn't know your password?

 **that boleyn girl:** u kidding me?

 **that boleyn girl:** she knows all my passwords

 **that boleyn girl:** even my phone

 **Regrets &Coffee: **Huge oof.

 **Regrets &Coffee: **Anyways, any of you fancy going on a coffee run with me tomorrow?

 **Regrets &Coffee: **We're all out.

 **KweenCleves:** meeeee

 **J.S.:** Cathy, we've just restocked.

 **Mentally Dead:** Girl, I just checked

 **Mentally Dead:** We're all out

 **Regrets &Coffee: **I've told both of you countless times that coffee is my life force.

 **J.S.:** It's unhealthy!

 **Regrets &Coffee: **Says the woman who apparently has a slushie addiction and not a tea addiction!

 **that boleyn girl:** my bad i told cat tht ur obsessed with slushies n she filled in the link

 **Mentally Dead:** Technically I figured it out after talking to Kat but yes Bo helped

 **Mentally Dead:** Also between you and Jane, Jane's addiction is better managed than yours

 **Mentally Dead:** I mean, you drink it every fucking hour

 **J.S.:** I should consider setting a budget for coffee purchases...

 **katsitter:** I BOUGHT THE ALARMSSSSSS

 **katsitter:** btw cuz ur 90 pounds broker

 **that boleyn girl:** gdi

* * *

"Lina, I need your help with something." Jane asked, her eyebrows knitted together as she approached her roommate, who paused the show she was watching the moment Jane asked her for help. "When Katherine asked me if there's anywhere that I wished to go on our date, am I supposed to come up with places of interest or am I allowed to tell her that I'm fine with following her lead?"

"... I'm sorry, what?" Catalina blinked, unable to believe that Jane didn't know the answer to such a simple question. Jane proceeded to repeat her question, but was cut off halfway. "I heard you the first time Jane."

"Oh! So what should I tell her?"

"Dear lord, if you really want to go somewhere, then tell her! If not, just tell her that you're okay with her taking the lead!" Catalina was exasperated with Jane, it was plain and simple to her. Jane nodded dumbly, glancing at the television before glancing uneasily at her phone. "What's going on? It's just Kat!"

"Anne told me that Katherine had interpreted it as a date with romantic undertones, and I don't want to let her down…"

"So you meant it in a platonic way after all?" Jane could only feebly shrug at the question, she didn't know how she felt towards Katherine. Or rather, she _did_ know how she felt, but was too scared to admit it. She didn't want to experience the same crushing rejection she did back in secondary school, and in all honesty, she felt that it was wrong to even consider a romantic relationship with someone of the same gender. Not that she would ever tell any of her friends that, she knew full well that they wouldn't understand her. "Jane, you need to know where your heart stands if you want to go on that date with Kat. Don't string her along."

"B-But she's most likely straight! She said it back when I drank those cups of horrible coffee!"

"Have you not considered that she's either in denial or still in the closet?"

"Have _you_ not considered that some of your friends are straight?!"

"Someone take my phone! I'm too scared to wait for Anna's reply!" Catherine exclaimed as she tossed her phone to the two fourth-years, with Jane fumbling to catch it. Catalina groaned, she was dealing with two useless women who had equally useless responses to their love interests. In Jane's case, possible love interest. "This is _so_ not me. I'm that cool person who takes their crushes in stride, not a hot mess due to a beautiful woman's sparkling smile and childishly adorable laughter!"

"You two are useless as fuck."

"Oh please, just now you were pacing about like a madwoman with regards to your date with Boleyn!" Catherine retorted, she had witnessed first-hand her roommate, who usually had her shit together, freaking out over a date she had with their most chaotic friend. "It's not even a real date! Howard just told you to use that opportunity to sort out your feelings for her!"

"Yeah, but the more I think about it, the more I'm doubting myself! Like, am I actually in love with her? Do I want to hold her hands and lead her along the Thames? Do I want to kiss her as Big Ben tolls?"

"... Do you Lina?"

"That's the fucking problem! The more I think about it, the more I'm sure that I'm in love with the stupidly smart and chaotic bitch of a Boleyn!" Catalina was now in panic mode, and both her roommates weren't sure if they should be annoyed that Catalina had finally realised that she loved Anne, or relieved that she was only freaking over it now. "Fuck fuck _fuck_!"

"Yeah yeah yeah, someone help _me_ with Katherine." Catherine scoffed, it was clear to her that Jane should simply tell Katherine what she wanted. Unfortunately for her, Jane was bad at being honest unless it was something of grave concern like her mental health. "What?! I need help too!"

"Be honest! Aragón's been telling you, Boleyn's been telling you, and now _I'm_ telling you, just be fucking honest with that flaming pink girl you adore so much!"

"Honesty isn't something that comes naturally to me!"

"I'm surprised that for someone who's pretty fucked up, no offence, you're able to realise that flaw of yours."

"Not admitting it is very different from not being self-aware."

"Oh shut the fuck up both of you! I'm trying to have a sexuality crisis here!" Catalina yelled, fed up with her roommates' bickering. "Catherine, just be your awkward nerd self during the date! And Jane! Just be honest with Kat because honestly? Both of your mental health are fucking shit and I'm pretty sure you're aware about hers so just be your usual self and try not to put your damn foot into your mouth!"

"So… you want me to keep up the facade that I'm fine when I'm not while protecting Katherine's smile?" Jane repeated, which was responded with a screech from a very stressed Catalina. "... Can I still get slushed ice during our date?"

"LITERALMENTE NO ME IMPORTA SOLO DÉJAME ENTRAR EN PÁNICO EN PAZ!" Jane nodded, slowly making her way to Catherine's side, who was now concerned for the Psychology major instead of the Education major.

"Do… do you know what Lina's saying?"

"Nope, but I could make out 'panic'. She's probably asking us to shut the fuck up so that she can panic in peace or something." Catherine shrugged, sometimes Catalina would speak in Spanish (usually when she was riled up) and she had learnt to guess what her roommate was saying based on the previous parts of the conversation that were spoken in English. "We should be glad that those three would never see us be complete messes."

"Technically, Katherine has seen me at my worst but fair point."

* * *

**[haus of holbein!!!]**

_**[1.06 AM]** _

**KweenCleves:** u gurls still upppp????

 **that boleyn girl:** yea no thks to u

 **katsitter:** u kno we cld just talk irl

 **that boleyn girl:** yea no we got a warning yst abt us being loud af

 **KweenCleves:** yea we chaos bby

 **KweenCleves:** but but but srsly

 **KweenCleves:** i need help

 **that boleyn girl:** u kno smth called google rite

 **KweenCleves:** cathy just asked me out on a date

 **that boleyn girl:** just say yes calmly while u freak out in front of us ltr

 **katsitter:** mmhm

 **katsitter:** or u cld do some hmwk if u dun wanna highkey freak out

 **KweenCleves:** sooooo stress prdtivitly

 **that boleyn girl:** i only hv two moods when im stressed

 **katsitter:** either u hv sex with lina or u scream at random hrs

 **that boleyn girl:** u get me cuz

 **katsitter:** -_-

 **katsitter:** remind me to tell my therapist tht u two r still bonkers af

 **KweenCleves:** is sure :) a gd response???

 **KweenCleves:** plsplspls replyyyy

 **that boleyn girl:** yea its gd

 **that boleyn girl:** fuck ur probs more functional than us

 **KweenCleves:** wait u mean ur freaking out wit catherlina

 **that boleyn girl:** ok look its hard to oneup her smoothly

 **katsitter:** when are boleyns ever smooth

 **that boleyn girl:** ur a boleyn too

 **katsitter:** only on my mums side

 **KweenCleves:** but r boleyns smooth talkers?

 **katsitter:** they r as subtle as a brick thrown at a window on a quiet nite

 **that boleyn girl:** gurl im lit like fireworks

 **KweenCleves:** anyways kat wht r u gonna do abt ur date which anne told me abt

 **katsitter:** i hv no idea bc this is my first date with someone i like

 **katsitter:** i mean thers thomas but i thot they were fiendly

 **KweenCleves:** hes a fiend alrite

 **that boleyn girl:** this is confusing

 **that boleyn girl:** is this the part where i ask if ur straight but gay for janey or i get mindfucked?

 **katsitter:** look i just wanna get her mind off things

 **katsitter:** mental breakdowns take tolls on ppl

 **katsitter:** n why do u always question my secuality

 **that boleyn girl:** bc u make interactionsa with her look gay n u act gay abt her but u say ur not gay

 **katsitter:** u need to understand tht some ppl dun need to enter romantic relstolnahpiasp with others n r fine being frens

 **that boleyn girl:** i mean yea tru but its kinda hard to see u as aro

 **KweenCleves:** lets not force her into a label

 **KweenCleves:** if kat says tht shes not gay then shes not gay

 **KweenCleves:** we dun force u into labels do we

 **katsitter:** awwww thks anna

 **that boleyn girl:** im bi lebean

 **that boleyn girl:** bi lesbane

 **that boleyn girl:** lebanese

 **that boleyn:** GDI I ONLY LIKE FUCKING GIRLS BUT I LIKE BOTH GENDERS

 **KweenCleves:** yea imma just call u alien

 **KweenCleves:** u act like one on a daily basis anyways

 **katsitter:** rofllll

 **that boleyn girl:** fuck u both

 **katsitter:** lol

 **katsitter:** imma go back n look thru the feedback dorothy gave me abt my drama

 **that boleyn girl:** great imma go sleep

 **that boleyn girl:** chaos needs to look gd tmr

 **KweenCleves:** n imma be a chaotic mess n yeet my phone across the wall

**[KweenCleves]**

_**[1.56 AM]** _

**katsitter:** anna?

 **KweenCleves:** yea kat??

 **katsitter:** do u think we r ok?

 **katsitter:** also is ur phone ok aft u yeeted it

 **KweenCleves:** no offence but shflnt u be asking ur cuz this??

 **KweenCleves:** btw yea phones fine it bounced off the bed n slapped me in the face

 **katsitter:** yikes anywayd

 **katsitter:** shes asleep

 **katsitter:** n i dun wanna die

 **KweenCleves:** oooof fair point

 **KweenCleves:** btw whos the we

 **katsitter:** me n jane

 **KweenCleves:** only u kno abt jane

 **KweenCleves:** n as for u… i dunno rlly

 **KweenCleves:** do u feel ok?

 **katsitter:** therapys helping

 **katsitter:** tho sometimes before i sleep i think abt how i cld hv stopped them

 **katsitter:** or at least oe of them

 **katsitter:** sometimes i forget n others its all i can think abt

 **katsitter:** then i think abt how im not clean enough for jane

 **katsitter:** n i think abt how i ask anne to be honest when im not

 **katsitter:** n im just… hollow somttimes

 **katsitter:** like sometimes i feel like im telling a story by writing in my diary

 **katsitter:** it doesnt feel like i actually lived thru all the shit

 **katsitter:** n i try to cry bc it means im accepting it but i cant

 **katsitter:** i think abt how jane has it worse than me n im just

 **katsitter:** i dun kno

 **katsitter:** it just feels like im being helpless n being a burden all over again

 **katsitter:** like i kno im not bc u n anne say it to me

 **katsitter:** but when i think of jane n how she managed to cope without others knowing

 **katsitter:** im just… i feel like im deadwight

 **katsitter:** i feel tht im selfish

 **katsitter:** every time ppl just accodmoea me

 **katsitter:** even now janes just saying ok to the date bc i told her i look forward to it

 **KweenCleves:** kat theres nothing u cld do abt them n its ok

 **KweenCleves:** its ok to accept tht u need help n its ok that u cldnt do anything abt it

 **KweenCleves:** none of it was ur fault

 **KweenCleves:** i canl never fully relate to the pain tht u went thru but i wanna emphasise tht none of it was ur fault n u shldnt hv to bear responsibility just bc those bastards cldnt keep it in their trousers

 **KweenCleves:** n just bc u hv a sexual history dun mean tht ur not clean enough for jane

 **KweenCleves:** rape or not its how u r as a person tht determines whether ur clean or not

 **KweenCleves:** u hv a beautiful personality and a soul thts way too gd for any of us

 **KweenCleves:** thst wht matters

 **KweenCleves:** also just bc ur not honest when u tell anne to dun mean tht ur bad

 **KweenCleves:** whts important is tht u realise the discrepacies n reflect upon them

 **KweenCleves:** no one has it better or worse than each other

 **KweenCleves:** all struggles r diff n theres no one way to dertmmine whether they r worse ot not

 **KweenCleves:** jane has her own shit to deal with n so do u

 **KweenCleves:** tht dun mean tht ur dealing less shit than her

 **KweenCleves:** n just bc jane dun hv anyone while dealing with her shit doesnt mean tht ur not allowed to rely on others

 **KweenCleves:** ppl hv diff way of coipng n theres no true method thts applicable for all

 **KweenCleves:** ur not selfish for asking for help

 **KweenCleves:** if anything this shows tht u kno when u need help n r willing to ask for it

 **KweenCleves:** ur a selfless woman whos always willing to lend a helping hand even to strangers

 **KweenCleves:** ppl dun accomodate u bc ur dealing with shit

 **KweenCleves:** we help each other bc we care for each other

 **KweenCleves:** ur never a deadweight

 **KweenCleves:** ur the one who did her best to make jane feel better

 **KweenCleves:** ur there for anne when her throat was slit

 **KweenCleves:** ur there for me when i broke my fucking leg n was crying like a bitch at the hospital

 **KweenCleves:** just bc u never did anything physical doesnt meant tht u didnt help us emotionally

 **KweenCleves:** n for the record jane agreed to go out with u bc she likes u enough

 **KweenCleves:** ok we dun kno if she likes u in tht way or not but shes doing it bc she wants to

 **KweenCleves:** just bc cathy and catlira say tht shes mainly a pushover dun meantht shes forcing herself

 **KweenCleves:** if anything shes doing it bc she wants to

 **KweenCleves:** n thts bc u helped her to understand tht its ok for her to want things for her own sake

 **KweenCleves:** so ur never a deadweight n ur never selfish

 **katsitter:** for someone who claims to be bad at words ur pretty gd at it

 **KweenCleves:** i try my best lol

 **katsitter:** btw theres another reason why i didnt wake cuz up

 **KweenCleves:**???

 **katsitter:** shes gonna be so mad when she finds out tht i do swing tht way

 **KweenCleves:** huh

 **KweenCleves:** oh

 **KweenCleves:** OHHHHH

 **katsitter:** r u ok i hear noises frm ur rm

 **KweenCleves:** hhhhhhhhhh im srry just hhhhhh

 **KweenCleves:** when did u find out????

 **katsitter:** i dun kno honestly

 **katsitter:** but i kinda knew when cuz told me tht i fancies her at the cafe

 **katsitter:** wait no not then

 **katsitter:** ok i dun rmb but its def recent

 **katsitter:** but at one point i realised tht on janes part its frenship but on my part its not rlly tht

 **katsitter:** is wht we hv considered love?

 **KweenCleves:** im not either of u so i cant say for sure

 **KweenCleves:** but frm my experience with cathy?

 **KweenCleves:** ur def crushing on her at least

 **katsitter:** soooo love is abt dreaming abt them n wanting to make them happy

 **katsitter:** n lend a shoulder when they cry

 **katsitter:** n feel ur heart be warm n soft when they smile at the smallest things

 **katsitter:** n wanting to fuck up ppl who made them cry

 **KweenCleves:** yea thts wht love is

 **KweenCleves:** did u feel tht back then?

 **katsitter:** mmhm

 **katsitter:** i thot i was wrong bc all they wanna do is to hv sex

 **katsitter:** so i thot tht wanting to hv sex is love

 **katsitter:** n when i told them no they just said tht i didnt love them

 **katsitter:** so i wasnt wrong?

 **KweenCleves:** no u werent

 **KweenCleves:** gdi lemme fuck one of them up

 **KweenCleves:** lemme at tht babysitter of urs

 **katsitter:** i hv no idea where he is now

 **katsitter:** also why not henry??

 **KweenCleves:**...i hv a very very fragile truce with him tht annes not making it better

 **KweenCleves:** disclaimer i still hate his guts ok

 **KweenCleves:** but when both ur parents consider each other as their son-daughter u kinda hv to suck it uip

 **KweenCleves:** trust me when i say tht we r NOT anywhere close to being siblings

 **KweenCleves:** n yes my fam knows tht hes messed up but u kno they dun wanna give up on changing him for the better

 **katsitter:** lol ur parents r naive

 **katsitter:** also

 **katsitter:** u may wanna lock her up on april fools then

 **katsitter:** shes probs gonna get arrested

 **KweenCleves:**...imma sleep n dream tht anne dun get arrested

 **katsitter:** hard same

 **katsitter:** anna?

 **KweenCleves:**?

 **katsitter:** srry n thks

 **katsitter:** for listening

 **katsitter:** even tho we r not tht close

 **KweenCleves:** lol we hv seen ppl on drugs dancing at holbeins we r bonded for life

 **katsitter:** lol tru

 **katsitter:** nite anna

 **KweenCleves:** u too kat

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> 1\. Should Katherine really treat the possibility of having a stalker lightly? What are some possible end results as a result of her stance?
> 
> 2\. Compare Katherine's portrayal in Chapter 1 with this chapter. How has Katherine changed over the months and what are some possible reasons for this change?
> 
> 3\. Do you think Jane genuinely doesn't know that she had asked Katherine out on a romantic date? Why or why not, and what does this say about Jane's personality?
> 
> 4\. Should we share passwords with the people closest to us? Why or why not?
> 
> 5\. There are people who believes that they need to use labels, be it for themselves or for others. Why do you think these people find that there's a need to use labels? Are they right or wrong for believing to have this particular need?
> 
> 6\. Does everyone deserve second chances regardless of the severity of their past mistakes? Why or why not?


	13. Chapter 13

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I've been calling this story 'disaster project' on Tumblr, and now it's time for the disaster to actually happen.
> 
> Edit (15 November 2020): I've re-read the chapter and I found out that Code Black actually mentions rape and not attempted rape like what I had previously remembered. That's my fault.

"To think Howard actually personalised our alarms." Catherine remarked as she held up the device Katherine had given to all five of them a while back. She was out on a Valentine's Day date with Anna, who grinned in agreement at the remark. They didn't know where to go, hence they decided to trainhop until a certain time, then make their way back to the school campus and use the school's facilities to stargaze. "How did you even convince that professor to let you use the equipment?"

"I promised her that I'll pay for any damage and that I'll ensure everything's locked up before we leave. That, and we can't stay past four." Anna shrugged, it was easy to convince her professor once she brought up Valentine's Day. Who knew they were a romantic? "Are you good with directions?"

"I guess so? Let me guess, you're the type that gets lost within the station?"

"Nah, that's Kat. I'm just asking because I need another pair of eyes in case we get _too_ lost." They both laughed, making their way to the station. "How do you feel 'bout the Circle Line?"

"Hmm, I was thinking we should try District. We could always visit Richmond."

"Ooh, I'm gonna get down like how the real Anna von Kleve did when Henry died like the fucker he was!"

"I think we'll have to walk a bit, but that works for me." Catherine looked up the map on her phone, the last thing she wanted was to get lost, not that she was opposed to getting lost with Anne if it meant enjoying some peace and quiet from their more chaotic friends. Anna grinned, pointing out that they were nearing the station. "I'm so lucky we have a full Sunday together."

"Ja! Plus we don't have to worry about Anne showing up!"

* * *

"Your idea of a date is at the London Zoo? Ha! This is great! Let's set all the animals free!" Anne cheered while Catalina hid her excitement behind a stoic mask. They were lining up to purchase tickets, and Anne was drawing attention to them. Catalina sighed, a resigned smile on her face as she watched her date randomly screaming like a feral beast. At one point, she had accepted that Anne's borderline dangerous actions were her way of regulating herself, with the occasional screaming serving as a method to release her pent-up energy. "C'mon Cat, scream with me!"

"I'll pass, try not to scream when we enter the zoo."

"Pffft, of course I won't do that. There's a time to be a screaming chaotic mess and there's a time to _not_ be a screaming chaotic mess!" Anne rolled her eyes, she knew that most of her actions were classified as strange at best, and concerning at worst. That didn't stop her from committing borderline criminal acts, though to be fair she only did so when Henry was involved. Except the Holbein incident, but that wasn't her fault. "Did you bring the alarm Kitty bought with my money?"

"Yup, remind me to test which one's louder once we're done with our date today."

"They're literally the same."

"I meant the friendship alarm and you."

"Bitch." Anne swore good-naturedly, her date sticking her tongue out playfully in response. Truth be told, Anne was much more nervous than usual. Ever since she admitted to her cousin that she was ready to be more open with Catalina and possibly confess, she was filled to the brim with nervous energy that she needed to release before she fucked up in front of her crush. Fortunately for her, Catalina was already used to her antics. "What do you think I need to do to break the sound barrier?"

"Believe in yourself, and after screaming till you get hoarse, realise that you're nothing and that the sound barrier can't be broken by a mere human such as yourself."

"Pfffft, that's just gonna fuel me more."

"Daddy, why is that lady screaming?" A boy in front of them asked his father, who immediately shushed his son while giving Anne (and by extension Catalina) wary looks. Anne flipped him off, with Catalina using her purse to cover her date's middle finger. "Daddy?"

"Son, don't look at her. She's bonkers. C'mon, look away from crazy lady." The father whispered, loud enough for both women to hear. Before Anne could react, Catalina marched up to the man with fury emanating from her strong frame. She had murder in her dark eyes as she squared off against the man, who was at least two heads taller than her. "Can I help you?"

"You can help me with _this_!" Before he could retort, Catalina slammed her fist to his cheek. A bruise formed on his face as she marched back to where Anne was, who was clapping with admiration. Catalina had no regrets punching the man, even though it was highly out of character for her to allow emotions to take control. "What?"

"I didn't know you have it in you!"

"Well, _someone_ needs to inform him that I'm the only one who can insult you."

"Awww, you're making it hard for me to one up you."

* * *

**[henry viii's ex-wives]**

_**[11.30 AM]** _

**that boleyn girl:** newsflash cat totes punched the lights outta someone

 **Regrets &Coffee: **Ouch, is her hand alright?

 **KweenCleves:** did she kick them in the legs??

 **KweenCleves:** or did she stomp on their bits??

 **J.S.:** Shouldn't we ask what the other party has done?

 **Mentally Dead:** Oh he called Bo bonkers

 **Mentally Dead:** I mean, she really is but only I can insult her like that

 **katsitter:** awwwww wht did she do???

 **Mentally Dead:** Scream her head off while waiting in line to purchase tickets to the zoo

 **J.S.:** … That's not a good sign.

 **that boleyn girl:** ok look screaming is healthy

 **J.S.:** Not in public!

 **that boleyn girl:** ok but wht wld u do is kitty cries in public?

 **J.S.:** Hug her tight and reassure her, like what any of us would do!

 **KweenCleves:** is tht ur final ans????

 **J.S.:** I'm not good with words!

 **J.S.:** I don't know how to threaten people!

 **J.S.:** Neither do I have self-defence skills!

 **Regrets &Coffee: **You stabbed someone's eyes in self-defence.

 **that boleyn girl:** n u held ur own against my bitch sis

 **Mentally Dead:** Anyone who can hold their own against Mary is definitely able enough to threaten people

 **katsitter:** can u girls not put jane on the spot

 **katsitter:** its too early for this

 **KweenCleves:** time is a social contsuct kat

 **J.S.:** What would all of you do then?

 **that boleyn girl:** kill em

 **that boleyn girl:** like legit no joke i wld do my best to kill em

 **Mentally Dead:** She usually fails, but she would successfully harm them

 **Mentally Dead:** She looks so adorable flailing about as she's restrained

 **that boleyn girl:** oi wtf im not adorable

 **KweenCleves:** lmao yea u keep on telling urself tht

 **Mentally Dead:** As for me, I would probably point out your insecurities and make you feel shit about yourself

 **katsitter:** wht if theyr depressed or suicidal?

 **Mentally Dead:** I'll claim that I didn't do anything

 **KweenCleves:** totes punch em

 **KweenCleves:** look at me

 **KweenCleves:** im lowkey ripped

 **J.S.:** Really? Why do you say that?

 **KweenCleves:** bc i do boxing

 **Regrets &Coffee: **Can confirm, she's really firm and will make a good addition to an international magazine featuring muscular women.

 **that boleyn girl:** ur still boxing?

 **KweenCleves:** recetly resumed

 **KweenCleves:** ill suker punch the lights outta em

 **Regrets &Coffee: **I'll go with the classy route

 **J.S.:** Be the better person?

 **Regrets &Coffee: **Honey, no.

 **Regrets &Coffee: **I meant blackmail.

 **Regrets &Coffee: **Are you aware of DirtyBurns?

 **Mentally Dead:** NO

 **Mentally Dead:** YOU RUN THAT PAGE?!

 **Mentally Dead:** WHAT THE FUCK I WROTE A REPORT ON THAT SAYING THAT THE PEOPLE RUNNING IT WERE BORED PSYCHOS DETERMINED TO RUIN LIVES

 **Mentally Dead:** OH MY GOD YOU'RE A PSYCHO

 **Mentally Dead:** CATHERINE PARR HOW COULD YOU

 **Regrets &Coffee: **Your report helped us cultivate a reputation.

 **Regrets &Coffee: **And no, I'm not a psycho.

 **KweenCleves:** wait but u love our coffee

 **J.S.:** There's more than one person running this gossip mill?

 **katsitter:** mmhm

 **KweenCleves:** no

 **KweenCleves:** not the cinnamon roll

 **that boleyn girl:** its me u dumb bitches

 **that boleyn girl:** i just gave her the password to my account bc i hhv the tendency to forgte

 **KweenCleves:** oh ok tht explains the shit water

 **Regrets &Coffee: **And before any of you say anything, I only found out that Boleyn's my partner in crime recently.

 **J.S.:** I should be reporting you to the school.

 **Regrets &Coffee: **Please don't.

 **J.S.:** I'm not, I'm simply going to ask both of you to use the platform for good.

 **Mentally Dead:** I called Bo a bored psychopath determined to ruin lives

 **KweenCleves:** ngl its kinda tru

 **Mentally Dead:** That explains how the ones running seems to know everything about people

 **katsitter:** how did u manage tht when ur not tht active on ur social medai account?

 **that boleyn girl:** oh pls

 **that boleyn girl:** im gd at picking up stuff

 **that boleyn girl:** u wldnt believe how some ppl r stupid enough t trust me

 **KweenCleves:** this is the gurl tht says tht politics r not her thing when shes clearly hooked on it

 **katsitter:** ^

 **Mentally Dead:** Wait so what does Catherine do?

 **Regrets &Coffee: **Blackmail and spill tea but in a way befitting of an English major.

 **Mentally Dead:** That explains the language used

 **katsitter:** where r u now anna?

 **KweenCleves:** at my palace duh

 **Regrets &Coffee: **On our way to her palace, but yes.

 **that boleyn girl:** oh richmond

 **that boleyn girl:** hv fun getting down lol

 **J.S.:** How did you even know?

 **that boleyn girl:** i study history rmb??

 **J.S.:** Till this day, I still can't see Anne as a student.

 **Regrets &Coffee: **Facts.

* * *

Jane was fiddling with the bracelet she received from Katherine as her Christmas gift, she wondered if she made the right decision by accepting the dreaded truth. She sighed, perhaps she had gone too far by applying makeup. She was sure that she had gone overboard with her clothes for their outing together, and she was sure that Katherine would be mentally laughing at her overzealous effort to be presentable. With a trembling fist, she gently knocked on the door to signal Katherine that she was here. After a few thuds and instances of swearing, the door opened to Katherine in her favourite pink hoodie. The door immediately slammed shut, making Jane worry that she was indeed overdressed.

**[SAP]**

_**[12.03 PM]** _

**J.S.:** I TOLD YOU BOTH THAT I'M OVERDRESSED!

 **Mentally Dead:** Holy shit you used caps

 **Mentally Dead:** Send a picture?

 **J.S.:** You've seen it before you left!

 **Mentally Dead:** Just let me see again

 **J.S.:** [overdressedhelp.jpg]

 **Regrets &Coffee: **Love, that's not overdressed.

 **Regrets &Coffee: **Grey cardigan, forest green blouse, HOPEFULLY that knee-length black skirt that I saw before leaving the house.

 **J.S.:** It is!

 **Mentally Dead:** Shoes?

 **J.S.:** The pair of slip-ons both of you told me to wear!

 **Regrets &Coffee: **Okay so why are you panicking?!

 **J.S.:** Because Katherine wore nothing but her hoodie!

 **J.S.:** I'm pretty sure she's also wearing a pair of shorts but they're too short to be seen!

 **J.S.:** But either way, she slammed the door on me!

 **Mentally Dead:** Have you… considered that Kat realised that she's UNDERDRESSED for her fucking date with you?!

 **Regrets &Coffee: **You don't have to worry about whether it's platonic or romantic for this, even friends would slam the door on other friends when they realise that they're not properly dressed.

 **Mentally Dead:** No i wont

 **Mentally Dead:** That was Bo

 **Mentally Dead:** Just in but kittys screaming abt how u came earlier than expected

 **Mentally Dead:** Tbf to u shes not tht gd with time management

 **Mentally Dead:** Also janey u look hot

 **Mentally Dead:** were ur tits always this big??

 **Regrets &Coffee: **It's called Wonderbras from your favourite place.

 **J.S.:** Did you just show Anne that photo?!

 **Regrets &Coffee: **Hey gurl u dun need to worry!

 **Regrets &Coffee: **Kats just flustered n she thinks ur very pretty

 **Regrets &Coffee: **U hv our permission to knock her out if she doesnt praise u ltr

 **Regrets &Coffee: **also daaaaaaamn those wonderbras r working out well for u

 **Regrets &Coffee: **That was Anna by the way.

 **J.S.:** Oh for the love of everything holy…

"Jane! Come in! I'm not done yet but help yourself to whatever's in the kitchen!" The door opened once more, revealing Katherine clad in nothing but her lingerie. Jane's face was flushed a bright red, her grey eyes doing their best to not openly stare at her date for the day. Katherine didn't notice and tugged the fourth-year inside before leaving her alone in the living room while she searched for something that was presentable enough for Jane.

 _'Do not think about her chest, do not think about her fondness for lacy bras, do not think about her toned body, seriously stop thinking about them Jane!'_ Jane was panicking, she had the feeling that Katherine didn't appreciate being seen as a sexual object and unsuccessfully tried to purge her inappropriate thoughts out of her mind. She resumed fiddling with the bracelet, hoping that it would distract her from her thoughts. She decided to think about something else, like how she would come clean about her sexuality, like how she locked herself in the closet due to numerous reasons, anything but Katherine in a state of undress.

"I'm so _so_ sorry, I did wake up earlier to prepare but I'm really rotten at keeping track of time and before I knew it…" Jane tuned herself out as she was left awestruck at what Katherine was wearing. Katherine was wearing a faded denim jacket on top of a neon pink t-shirt, and Jane could never imagine herself wearing a pair of black shorts like how the younger woman did. She simply lacked the confidence for that. "... Jane? Are you alright?"

"Y-Yes! Absolutely fine here! O-Oh yes, I actually brought something for you." Jane held up a medium sized box and thrusted it into Katherine's hands, her cheeks tinged a light red as she tried her best to compose herself. "I-It's nothing special, it's well- oh sorry you probably think waffling on but-"

"Jane! It's okay, I love hearing you talk. May I open it?" Jane nodded, gesturing for Katherine to open up her gift. She did, and upon opening the lid, a gleaming silver letter opener with an intricate design on the handle resting snugly in it. "Oh! It's beautiful! Are you sure I can have it?"

"Absolutely! It's um, actually it came in a pair. I have the other one back home, I bought this on a whim when I first came to London to commemorate and well- sorry, I'm going on again."

"No no no! I would love to hear more!" Katherine meant it, she would listen to Jane the whole day even if it meant not going on their date.

At her encouragement, Jane explained how she preferred to send letters to people despite the convenience of texting, and that she was always so thrilled when they actually sent her a letter back. She told Katherine about how when she was younger and online texting wasn't a common sight, she would eagerly look forward to letters sent by her grandparents and she would always use a shiny letter opener to open them. The intended recipient didn't matter to her, all she wanted to do was to open letters. Katherine smiled fondly as Jane continued on, it had been a while since Jane was so excited, so relaxed.

"... and that's why- oh dear, I'm boring you again. Forgive me, it's been a while since I sent any letters..." Katherine shook her head, proceeding to give Jane a bear hug. Jane froze up, she wasn't expecting the hug, even though she welcomed it. "O-Oh!"

"You're really warm Jane, even more so than Anna." Katherine mumbled, subtly tightening her grip around Jane. Jane gulped, what were her hands supposed to do? Were they supposed to reciprocate the hug? Were they supposed to remain at her side? Or were they supposed to be up in the air and possibly flailing about? Eventually Katherine released her hug, though Jane felt a mix of relief and disappointment. "Anyways, I actually have something for you too! Wait right here!"

"Oh, it's really-" Katherine had disappeared before Jane could finish her sentence, the only indication that Katherine was still within the house was the crashes and swearing from her. Jane chuckled, donning a more serious expression once Katherine came back to the room with a paper bag in hand. She held it out for Jane, a bright smile on her face as Jane accepted it curiously. "... Thank you Katherine."

"Aw shucks, you don't even know what it is."

"Either way, I'll treasure it." Jane could always open it after the date was over, she wasn't sure if she should open it in front of Katherine. Katherine herself was grinning from ear to ear, which said leaps and bounds about the effort she invested in getting Jane that present. "Shall we go? I believe you have an exciting day lined up?"

"That's giving me too much credit, but yeah we definitely should get going."

* * *

"This place is _way_ cooler than the one on Google Maps." Anna was awestruck at the size of the building, once magnificent but now worn down as a result of the time passed. Catherine nodded, taking pictures of the architecture while Anna marvelled at how a piece of history still stood before them. "Anne would probably love this place."

"She'll probably also burn this place down."

"Nah, she has a rule to not burn historical places down. Not sure if it extends to Richmond Park though, but I doubt she'll want to set it on fire." Anna shrugged, touching the worn brick walls gently. "I'm surprised no one tried to graffiti this place."

"Perhaps some tried, but then they decided that it wasn't worth it to anger the dead royals. Think about it, who in the right mind dares to go against Henry VIII?"

"Your ancestral counterpart did, nearly got her head chopped off."

"She's lucky that she's persuasive enough to convince that fat buffoon that she's only trying to distract him from his leg pain." Catherine chuckled, walking along the perimeter of the building. She subtly closed the distance between them, so that her hand was able to brush against Anna's without arousing much suspicion. "... This might dampen the date, but… what _is_ Code Black?"

"It's uh… to put it simply, we forgot to lock the door once and some bloke broke in. Turned out to be Henry who was steaming mad at Kat for making a fool outta him."

"Oh... I'm sorry that happened to all three of you. Is that why all of you make it a point to ensure that the doors are properly locked?"

"I doubt we would've been so paranoid about it if he didn't rape her." Anna sighed, even though both roommates had forgiven her for forgetting to lock the door, she still felt guilty over it since it was her fault. "He… let's just say that it was hell. She insists that what nearly happened didn't trigger her, but… I was too scared to ask. She didn't report him, I… yeah."

"... I'm not sure what I should say. Nothing sounds appropriate other than sympathy, but is sympathy really what you need right now?" Catherine replied, genuinely at a loss for words. Sure, she had come across numerous novels that depicted some form of trauma and how the characters dealt with it. That didn't mean that she was any more equipped with the knowledge on what she should say, in fact she felt even more helpless knowing that textbook knowledge had failed her. "How does Aragón know about it?"

"Oh, Anne needed to call one of Kat's relatives that wasn't her due to her involvement so she called Catalina since she doesn't want to get her own family involved. I'm pretty sure the cops know that Catalina's no way related to them, but they let it slide." Anna reached out for Catherine's hand and squeezed it, she knew that she didn't really deserve it but she wanted some reassurance. "Sorry for kinda bringing the mood down, but honestly? I think you'll probably have to hear about it sooner or later."

"I should be the one apologising, I'm the one who asked about Code Black." Catherine squeezed back, hoping that Anne didn't pull away. She didn't, and they stared up at the palace's remains in silence, neither of them wanting to further dampen the mood. Eventually, Catherine was the one to speak up, painfully aware that they couldn't simply stare at the building in silence for hours. "Do you want to get something to eat? It's my treat."

"Yes to the food, nuh uh to the treat. You invited me out today, only fair that I give you something back."

"Your winning personality is already enough for me, no need to return any more favours."

"Okay okay, how 'bout we split the bill? Y'know, like on our first date."

"Alright then, I can never win against your flawless persuasion skills." Thunder rumbled above them, a warning that rain was soon to come. "Urgh, it's always raining in London."

"Mmhm, and it's still winter too. C'mon, let's get going before we freeze to death out here." Anna suggestion, a suggestion that Catherine easily agreed with. They ran straight down a path, and took a left turn. After a while, they realised that they were nowhere near the palace or any places they had encountered ever since they left Richmond Station. "... Well, fuck."

* * *

**[henry viii's ex-wives]**

_**[2.04 PM]** _

**KweenCleves:** ill never laugh at u again kat

 **katsitter:** wht did u do?

 **Regrets &Coffee: **We got lost.

 **that boleyn girl:** lmaoooo

 **that boleyn girl:** how tf did u girls get lost

 **KweenCleves:** its cool now

 **KweenCleves:** we took shelter

 **Mentally Dead:** Meanwhile Bo's playing with her nuggets

 **J.S.:** The zoo sells nuggets?

 **Regrets &Coffee: **When was the last time you visited the zoo?

 **J.S.:** Um…

 **katsitter:** we r going to the zoo next date

 **KweenCleves:** speaking of which wht r ur plans anyways??

 **that boleyn girl:** yea we cldnt get u to spill

 **J.S.:** We went to Westminster Cathedral and then went back to your place until the rain lets up.

 **J.S.:** For now, we're playing Animal Crossing on her Switch.

 **that boleyn girl:** she has a switch??

 **KweenCleves:** hhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh

 **KweenCleves:** thts mine

 **Mentally Dead:** I didn't know you have a Switch

 **Regrets &Coffee: **I learnt about it an hour ago.

 **katsitter:** i found out when i broke into ur rm

 **that boleyn girl:** why wld u even break into her rm???

 **KweenCleves:** im so disappointed in myself for not hiding it better

 **katsitter:** @that boleyn girl bc i was looking for hair accessories to impress jane today

 **katsitter:** gd thing she wants to impress cathy too

 **Regrets &Coffee: **Really? I'm flattered.

 **that boleyn girl:** gdi u mean we cld hv played ur switch n not mooch off janeys netflix???

 **J.S.:** I should cook curry rice next time.

 **KweenCleves:** pls tell me u didnt touch my pokemon

 **Mentally Dead:** Make it spicy please

 **Regrets &Coffee: **No.

 **Regrets &Coffee: **Please spare my tastebuds.

 **Mentally Dead:** Girl, you don't have any given the rate of coffee consumed

"Oof, sick burn. Anyways, my dino's gonna steal some of your fries." Anne remarked as she made her dinosaur nugget 'walk' all the way to where Catalina's fries were, attempting to steal said potato. Catalina used a fry to poke the nugget, then proceeded to hit it. "Ahhhh! Dino abuse! This is dino abuse you hear?!"

"Bad dinosaur, very bad dinosaur." Catalina smirked, playfully swatting the nugget until it let out a screech of surrender. She picked the nugget up and popped it into her mouth, all while Anne watched in horror. "What?"

"You… you _ate_ Rex! You monster! You ate him in front of his friends!" Anne exclaimed, gesturing to her box of dinosaur nuggets. Catalina shrugged, proceeding to explain that it was Rex's fault for attempting to steal her 'holy grail of potatoes'. "How am I in love with a dino murderer?!"

"Maybe because I'll get you another box of dinosaur nuggets just to shut you up?"

"Okay fair." Anne replied, swiping some of Catalina's fries and stuffing them into her mouth. Her date chuckled, she found the sight kind of endearing, even though Anne wasn't being dignified about it. "Mmph mmmgh mmph mnyph."

"I don't speak Boleyn, only Kat does remember?" Anne stuck out her tongue, small bits of potato stuck on it as she waved her tongue about playfully. Catalina rolled her eyes, making an empty threat to 'murder' more of Anne's dinosaurs if she didn't retract her tongue. "... By the way Bo, did you mean it?"

"Nmmph?"

"The part about you being in love with a dinosaur murderer." Anne gulped, nearly choking on the fries as she stared at her date in horror. It slipped out, and while she was planning to admit it to the fourth-year some time that day, confessing in a fast food restaurant while playing with her food wasn't what she had in mind. Catalina interpreted Anne's silence as a rejection, that she didn't mean it. Admittedly, she was hurt but she respected Anne's feelings. "I see. Anyways, if the rain lets up we could probably see the 3.15 snake show. Only concern is that the snakes might want to sleep or something, they hibernate during winter right? Hold up, why are there snake shows then?"

"Cat, once the zoo closes, you're coming with me to somewhere. And I'm not taking 'no way' as an answer." Anne wanted to scream in the middle of the restaurant, but she got the feeling that they would be kicked out if she did. She was nervous, and despite practicing it so many times with her cousin, she still couldn't get it right. Eventually Katherine told her to simply wing it and get a slushie because there was a 7-Eleven nearby, a piece of advice that Anne would probably follow after getting rejected. _'Love is fucking hard and this isn't helping. My life was way better when I didn't admit that I like her.'_

"How can I refuse an offer to show me up on Valentine's? I'm game, provided you don't throw your phone into the tiger exhibit again."

"For the last time, I did _not_ mean to yeet my phone to the fluffy cats!"

* * *

**[haus of holbein!!!]**

_**[5.45 PM]** _

**that boleyn girl:** IM NOT READY FOR THIS

 **KweenCleves:** wtf r u talking abt now just do it

 **that boleyn girl:** I CANT DAMN IT

 **that boleyn girl:** IM NOT READY FOR REJECTION

 **that boleyn girl:** CAN I JUST NOT CONFESS???

 **katsitter:** wtf no

 **katsitter:** i didnt allow myself to get confssed to so many times at tht fountain just for u to chicken out

 **KweenCleves:** wht fountain

 **KweenCleves:** also wtf u confessed to kat???

 **KweenCleves:** r u cheating on cathelinea now

 **that boleyn girl:** FOR PRACTICE U BITCH

 **that boleyn girl:** I EVEN GOT THIS SPEECH PREPARED TO SHOW MY SINCERITY

 **katsitter:** yea it was so extra

 **katsitter:** linlin wld probs appreciate it tho

 **KweenCleves:** ik we r on dates n we shldnt be texting each other but kat wth did u buy

 **that boleyn girl:** 90 pounds for 6 alarms makes sense

 **KweenCleves:** gurl those alrams cost 50 in total

 **KweenCleves:** it was a buy 5 get 1 free with heavy discounts bc u kno me

 **that boleyn girl:** u can just check????

 **KweenCleves:** i did n honestly i hv no clue wtf did she buy

 **katsitter:** its a mini squishy plague doc

 **KweenCleves:** yea i can see tht but srsly why did u get tht

 **that boleyn girl:** better question is why did you choose to ask this now

 **KweenCleves:** bc i was looking thru my emails n the receipt showed me tht

 **KweenCleves:** n yes i just checked my email sue me bitches

 **katsitter:** i bought tht for jane

 **katsitter:** it reminds me of her

 **katsitter:** n its cute

 **katsitter:** leafy looks like itll like it

 **that boleyn girl:** im just

 **that boleyn girl:** anyways whts janey doing

 **katsitter:** taking pics of big ben

 **KweenCleves:** sounds toursisty

 **katsitter:** ikr i asked linlin to help me plan but she was all lol nope see u sucker

 **that boleyn girl:** ok but londons pretty cool for dates

 **that boleyn girl:** u cant go wrong with london

 **katsitter:** bringing her to tower of london sounds bad

 **katsitter:** like its a prison in the past

 **katsitter:** a fancy prison but still prison

 **that boleyn girl:** its literally a tourist attraction

 **that boleyn girl:** anyhoo go back to ur slushie gf n do smth

 **KweenCleves:** way to pressure her

"It's getting crowded." Jane commented as Katherine shoved her phone back into her pocket, an uneasy smile balanced on her lips. Jane frowned, she wondered if she had been a poor date that afternoon. "I'm sorry for ruining your plans."

"What? No! You've done nothing wrong and honestly I should be the one apologising for dragging you around London even though we know the area like the back of our hands!"

"... I never really explored London, have I mentioned that this is my first time seeing the tower up close?" Jane looked up at the Elizabeth Tower, the scaffolding remained to indicate that the iconic landmark was still in the midst of its renovation. Katherine gasped, she couldn't believe that her date for the day had never once visited Big Ben, regardless of its state. "I haven't really seen much of London, even River Thames."

"No!"

"I was determined to focus on my education, I figured I could see the sights later once everything's settled. I didn't even visit John even though he lives here… though I don't think I ever asked for the address."

"... Are you glad that my plan was for us to visit the famous places then?" Katherine asked, perhaps her plan wasn't that much of a failure given that Jane didn't know her way around London like what the younger woman thought. Jane nodded, staring in the direction of the river. "That's a relief, I was absolutely positive that you wouldn't enjoy today and-"

"Katherine." Jane steeled herself, knowing that whatever she said next would shape the direction their relationship would take. Katherine blinked, noting how Jane had a serious expression. "I… As long as I'm with you, everything's enjoyable. So, thank you for today. Thank you for inviting me to dinner last year back when we first met, and thank you for not giving up on me even though I wasn't exactly the most… stable person."

"Jane…"

"... Also, I should apologise for something else."

"For?" Jane sighed, this was it. She was finally going to admit the one thing that she swore to not tell anyone, apart from her pet plant.

"... Remember back when I first invited you for coffee after the altercation with your cousin and I promised you that I would find you? I… actually lied, I wasn't planning on finding you back then." Jane admitted, if any of her friends knew about this, they would likely toss her into River Thames and leave her for dead. She could foresee Anne spearheading the plot, with the rest following. "N-Not because I didn't like you back then or anything! It's just… I was so sure that I'm a dreary person to be with deep down, with all that sordid talk about bullying and self-pity… and you deserved to have friends that are much more interesting so-"

"I'm sorry to interrupt, but who I choose to make friends with is up to me. When I first saw you, I… okay well I didn't trust you that much back then. But I knew that taking the risk to befriend you was worth it. Yes, I knew back then that you fought with Anne and I should've steered away from you, but I didn't want to. You said back then that stepping in to help was something everyone would do. Well, it's not. Everything that you said was something people would do in a heartbeat… they aren't. If you weren't there, I don't think anyone would bat an eye. Please don't look down on yourself, your kindness says volumes about you."

"I… thank you." Jane wanted to protest, that she wasn't as kind as she made everyone believe, that she only did so because she wanted people to notice her. However, she knew that Katherine wouldn't budge on her opinion, and protesting any further would simply lead to an argument in front of Big Ben with people staring at them. "By the way, did I tell you about what Cathy did yesterday?"

"Nope." Katherine knew that Jane was trying to change the subject, and she let her. Things were starting to grow awkward, and all Katherine wanted was to distract Jane from her internal turmoils, something that she was doing the exact opposite of. Jane had a hint of a smile as they made their way towards the nearest station, whether it was genuine or not was too dark for Katherine to make out.

"... so Cathy started to act weird after a few litres of coffee, and she started talking to Leafy. I wanted to surprise her a little, so I pretended to be Leafy and shouted 'leaf me alone'!"

"Oh no, another terrible pun."

"Fair, but Cathy leapt away from Leafy and started sobbing while detailing how she once tried to eat him because she thought he was a really huge jellybean."

"Does she remember this?"

"No, but Lina recorded the whole scene down. We planned on sending it to the group chat after her date with Anna's over." Katherine giggled, she could foresee the mortified expression on the English major's face once the video was sent to the group chat. Jane cracked a smile, relieved that she managed to lighten the mood between them and that she successfully made Katherine laugh.

"God, you two are evil."

* * *

**[SAP]**

_**[8.00 PM]** _

**Regrets &Coffee: **This is it, the moment of truth.

 **Mentally Dead:** You know, we shouldn't be on our phones during dates

 **J.S.:** Is it really a date if it's just an intimate gathering with the friend you've been interested in?

 **Mentally Dead:** Kind of, the dating game has changed a lot since the Victorian times

 **Regrets &Coffee: **Mmhm, fall in love fast and see it explode harder than a supernova.

 **Regrets &Coffee: **Afterwards, suffer a heartbreak heavier than a neutron star.

 **Mentally Dead:** Well someone has been reading up on their crush's interests

 **J.S.:** If I may, your date might be the most successful among the three of us.

 **Mentally Dead:** Yeah, I lowkey got rejected by Bo just now…

 **Regrets &Coffee: **She's probably freaking out?

 **Regrets &Coffee: **If anything, she's probably being her usual dumb self.

 **J.S.:** If anyone's going to get rejected, it's me.

 **J.S.:** Why would anyone, let alone Katherine, even express interest in a "depresso espresso" like me?

 **Mentally Dead:** And you need to lay off the coffee, unless you want to end up like Catherine

 **Mentally Dead:** Actually, stop hanging out with her

 **Mentally Dead:** I feel a sense of unease whenever you're using modern lingo said by her

 **Regrets &Coffee: **At least she's not picking up all your swearing.

 **Regrets &Coffee: **I have half the mind to hop on Duolingo just to learn Spanish.

 **Regrets &Coffee:** Seymour, have you admitted to Howard that you're… you know?

 **J.S.:** A repressed lesbian who dated Henry in a bid to assert my hetrosexuality but failed after the crippling realisation that not only is he abusive but also a terrible beard?

 **Regrets &Coffee: **… Have you been looking through my Austen stuff too?

 **J.S.:** I've read enough.

 **Mentally Dead:** … Not how I would go about coming out, but yes

 **J.S.:** I should just not say anything then.

 **Regrets &Coffee: **Sometimes I wonder just how self-aware are you given that neither of us picked up hints that you locked yourself in the damn closet.

 **Mentally Dead:** You said your gaydar went off around her!

 **Regrets &Coffee: **I didn't expect her to lock herself in there!

 **J.S.:** Horribly self-aware actually. I just don't show it.

 **Mentally Dead:** Catherine, I'm begging you just confess to Anna already

 **Mentally Dead:** Like, confessing on Valentine's is cheesy as shit but I really can't take the pining anymore

 **Mentally Dead:** Bo has been begging to lock you two in a room in the group meant to ship you two together

 **Regrets &Coffee: **I can say the same for you, even Seymour has approved of us of locking you two somewhere.

 **Mentally Dead:** Wait, are you all messing with our love lives?!

 **Regrets &Coffee: **Why did it even take you until now to notice?

 **Regrets &Coffee: **I've already been aware that Howard made a group without Anna or I just to ship us together.

 **J.S.:** I'll just leave you two alone to discuss this.

 **Mentally Dead:** Get back here Jane

"I like how we're having dinner in a Starbucks outlet while two of our useless friends are outside trying to one up each other." Anna commented, glancing through the window. There was a fountain outside Starbucks, with coloured lights shining on it to give the water multiple colours. Catherine nodded, sipping her coffee as she watched Anne make huge gestures at Catalina. "You think I should record the whole thing?"

"Go for it." Anna grinned as she left the cafe and hid near a sculpture that offered Anne a good view of her friends. Catherine pulled out a blue envelope and placed it near Anna's coffee, her blue eyes darting about nervously. She had spent days on writing the letter, even adding a drawing to make it less of a short story and more of a sincere letter. _'... Should I have gone with black paper instead? Why did I even think that navy blue was a good idea?'_

Catherine was worrying over the letter when her phone vibrated, startling her out from her thoughts. She had a faint smile on her face as she assumed it was a message from Anna, her smile dimming by a fraction when it was revealed that it was actually from Katherine.

**[katsitter]**

_**[8.16 PM]** _

**katsitter:** ur gd at coming out rite

 **Regrets &Coffee: **Why me?

 **katsitter:** i dunno u just give off this ive a cool coming out story

 **Regrets &Coffee: **… Shouldn't you be with Seymour?

 **katsitter:** we are ard london eye with slushies

 **Regrets &Coffee: **Is that a good thing?

 **katsitter:** jane assured me tht she just wants to drink something cold

 **katsitter:** looking up at its kinda cool ngl

 **katsitter:** back to the main point help me come out

 **Regrets &Coffee:** I don't know!

 **Regrets &Coffee: **We're not best friends if you think about it.

 **Regrets &Coffee: **We're the most distant among the six of us!

 **katsitter:** help a tattoo buddy out

 **katsitter:** how do i tell her tht i like her romantically n even tho i shldnt be dating now n even tho shes straight i still kinda like her

 **katsitter:** liek shes a gd fren n i rlly rlly appreciate her fenship but i also wanna smooch her n hug her squishy marshmallow body

 **katsitter:** n tht maybe i wld hv sex with her but def not anytime soon

 **katsitter:** n tht i might freak out if we actually do it

 **katsitter:** how do i put tht into worda

 **Regrets &Coffee: **Oh for fuck's sake, and here I thought your cousin's worse.

 **katsitter:**???

 **Regrets &Coffee: **Just tell her exactly what you just said to me!

 **katsitter:** the moods never rite

 **Regrets &Coffee: **Fuck the mood!

 **Regrets &Coffee: **I swear to god, you two aren't going to progress if one of you doesn't take the reins and just be honest!

 **Regrets &Coffee: **Do a fucking word vomit!

 **Regrets &Coffee: **Seriously! Even Boleyn's at a fountain confessing!

 **katsitter:** omg shes actually doing it????

 **Regrets &Coffee: **Yeah, and Anna's recording it as we speak.

 **katsitter:** oof tht doesnt sound romantic for u

 **Regrets &Coffee: **I don't care, she's fun, caring and her laughs sound like wind chimes on a breezy day.

 **katsitter:** okokok ill leave u to be gay for anna

 **katsitter:** if i get rejected ur coming with me to the tattoo place

 **Regrets &Coffee: **Holy shit stop being dramatic.

"Hahahahaha! They did it! They really fucking did it!" Anna entered the cafe again, with Catherine nodding along. Anna sat back in her seat, opposite Catherine. She was about to take a sip of her coffee when she noticed the envelope beside it. "Oh, this wasn't here before…"

"Why don't you read it?" Catherine suggested, controlling her facial expression while Anna listened to Catherine's suggestion. Anna opened up the envelope with ease as it wasn't sealed to begin with, and pulled out a crisp blue letter from it. She read through the contents, her eyes widening the more she read. Catherine couldn't tell if that was a good sign or not, and decided to remain silent until Anna was done.

"Cathy… can I… can I cry with joy or do you want me to be chill and say yes?" Anna asked, trying her hardest to not tear up over the confession letter. "This… this is the most fucking romantic shit I've seen and I'm just… oh god I think I'm gonna cry for real."

"I'm glad you like it, I mean every word on that letter."

"Fuck yeah, god and here I thought I could look up some cheesy shit about stars and love and sweep you off your feet later." Anna sniffled, controlling most of her tears and using a paper napkin to dab away the stray tears. "I love me one smooth as fuck Austen nerd."

"And I love a buff star nerd with beautiful black hair with a red lightning bursting out from it."

* * *

"You see that sparkling magic fountain? Yeah, it's time for me to one up you so keep your fucking snark to yourself!" Anne ordered as she started pacing about, with Catalina glancing at the fountain as she kept her phone away. She remembered it, it was the very same fountain that Katherine and Jane pushed them in before running away. "Okay so, I've got a few things to say so shut the hell up and lemme say it before I screech and yeet myself into the fountain."

"... I didn't say anything but okay, go on?"

"First of all, you're really annoying and always a huge mood killer whenever I wanna do something fun! But that's okay, because you have my interests at heart and you don't want me to use up my insurance!"

"... You have insurance?"

"Believe it or not yes. Second! You take really good care of me and everyone in my life even though we're gremlins. I really appreciate that and I love how you always swear at me in Spanish in your sleep."

"Wait, I do?"

"Third, I love how you put up with my shit even though you totes deserve better. You could've started a sex thing with Janey but decided to roll with me even though I have a hard nope towards choking."

"I don't think Jane's comfortable enough to be my friend with benefits to begin with."

"Fourth of all! I got really _really_ upset when you bought that fucking hair straightener just because Henry told you that curly hair sucks! Like seriously, you look like a fucking queen with those banging curls of yours! Why the hell did you listen to that prick anyways?!"

"O-Oh, thanks… but I stopped stra-"

"Fifth! You're seriously so fucking kind like who the hell runs all the way to the popo because your enemy needs someone to bail her and her roomies out? I mean all I told you back then was that we're about to head for the slammers and you were all 'no way bitch not on my watch' and then you gave me this _really_ soothing patting thing after I broke down about how I couldn't report Henry over Kitty's rape because she didn't wanna report it!"

"I'm pretty sure I said more than 'no way bitch not on my watch'..."

"Sixth! You could've left me to bleed out when Henry fucking gave me gills, but you stayed there and cried all over my face while shouting at others to call a fucking ambulance. And that's like literally after you broke up with him over me!"

"Apart from how that's chronologically wrong, I couldn't just let you die."

"Number after six because my Maths sucks! You're way too considerate of others like what the hell did we do to deserve you in our lives? Hell, what the hell did _I_ do to deserve the fucking Spanish-swearing goddess in front of me?! See, this bitch gives me her world and all I do is to ramp up the Pentagon or whatever defence system out there and not let you in! And that sucks, because I've been in love with this supposedly annoying bitch for probably a year now or probably it was love at first sight, I dunno?! All I can say is that I fucking love you, and I fucking messed up after you ate Rex because I wasn't planning to confess in a pathetic restaurant with grease all over my fingers!"

"... Mierda. Fuck you Anne. You fucking made me cry." Catalina sniffled, glaring at Anne through tears. "What the hell. How the fuck did a speech make _me_ cry? It was a fucking romantic speech from you and I'm just… fuck it's all your fault. This is why Anna's recording us right? You wanted proof that I'm touched by that shitty confession of yours."

"Anna? What do you-" Anne turned to her left, and saw a bright red streak floating in the air before disappearing. She felt herself growing hot, and not out of embarrassment. "Oh c'mon! That was an actual confession! Do you know how hard I practiced you buff piece of sh-"

"I love you too, and no, I don't have all that romantic shit prepared because I had a gay or bi or queer or whatever panic. The plan was _not_ to confess to you, the plan was to use today to confirm that I'm not gay for you."

"Obviously my sexiness helped you make the right decision."

"My standards are usually higher than this! I thought to myself 'Catalina, you want to date someone classy, graceful and polite', then you popped into my head and I was all 'fuck it, I want that one'!"

"... I _should_ be happy, but I kinda feel insulted not gonna lie."

"See! You're doing it again! Every time you spout some stupid shit, I always want to spend time with you and not better friends like Jane or even that coffee addict in that Starbucks with Anna!"

* * *

**[henry viii's ex-wives]**

_**[10.05 PM]** _

**KweenCleves:** [smoothafboleyn.mp4]

 **KweenCleves:** omgomg im still crying

 **Regrets &Coffee: **Liebling, it has been over an hour.

 **katsitter:** hhhhhhhhhh

 **katsitter:** is cuz rlly?

 **Mentally Dead:** Dating me? Absolutely

 **J.S.:** Oh, congratulations!

 **J.S.:** Why is Anna crying?

 **Regrets &Coffee: **My confession letter made her cry.

 **katsitter:** OMGGGGG U TWO R DATING NOW N HV NICKNAMES IN GERMANNNN

 **katsitter:** WELCOME TO ZE HAUS OF ANNAPARR

 **Mentally Dead:** Awwww 

**Mentally Dead:** I've something that'll make you cry Catherine!

 **Regrets &Coffee: **What is it?

 **Mentally Dead:** [leafmealone.mp4]

 **J.S:** I've always be-leafed everything will work out for my two best friends apart from Katherine!

 **katsitter:** omg why

 **that boleyn girl:** lmaooooooo

 **that boleyn girl:** leafy is a chunky jelkybean

 **that boleyn girl:** also time to get tht owl to teach me german n embarsss anna in fronyt of her new gf

 **Regrets &Coffee: **What the fuck Seymour you told me that I didn't do anything stupid!

 **Regrets &Coffee:** Also Boleyn, Duolingo is being a bitch and you're better off using Google Translate.

 **J.S.:** It wasn't stupid! It was funny!

 **J.S.:** Also Katherine approved of that pun!

 **katsitter:** lol no i didnt

 **Regrets &Coffee: **Anna asked what are you two doing?

 **katsitter:** we had dinner at my place bc i dun need a possible stalker raining on our date

 **katsitter:** still no signs of a stalker so calm ur tits cuz

 **that boleyn girl:** i literally didnt say anything?

 **katsitter:** n then we watched smth thts not barbie or mph

 **J.S.:** Toy Story 3 is a very touching film!

 **Mentally Dead:** What the hell

 **that boleyn girl:** hv u snogged yet

 **katsitter:** the only ones doing tht r barbie n ken

 **katsitter:** so weird to see toys kissing but oh well

 **Regrets &Coffee: **Anyways we won't be back tonight so if someone here wants to get freaky…

 **that boleyn girl:** ok look we only did it in ur rm like once

 **Mentally Dead:** Yeah, there were too many books to have a good one

 **Regrets &Coffee: **Wait.

 **Regrets &Coffee: **Did you two just?

 **Regrets &Coffee: **Does that mean that I have to sanitise ALL my books?!

 **J.S.:** I can help you burn them.

 **Mentally Dead:** Ooh yes good idea Jane

 **Regrets &Coffee: **Is this payback for borrowing your Bible for the Nazi book burning awareness event?

 **Mentally Dead:** Girl you stole my fucking Bible

 **Mentally Dead:** You're lucky Jane's not that old school and knows that the Bible can be found online!

"Wait, the Bible can be found online?" Jane asked, turning to face Katherine. The latter shrugged, muttering that almost anything could be found on the internet. "Technology truly is amazing…"

"It is, isn't it?" Katherine replied, glancing at Jane's shoulder. "Do you mind if I rest my head on your shoulder?"

"Wouldn't it hurt your neck? We _are_ of different heights…"

"It'll be fine! 15 centimetres isn't that huge of a difference!" Katherine said as she tried to rest her head on the fourth-year's shoulder, to no avail. She had underestimated their height difference, and soon ended up on Jane's lap. "Okay you're right, I'm too tall for this."

"I get to play with your hair though. You take really good care of it by the way." Jane smiled, absentmindedly running her fingers through Katherine's hair. She didn't know when it was since the younger woman was comfortable enough to initiate physical contact with her, she could remember back when Katherine trembled against her back. She had an inkling that rather than being scared of Thomas back then, the fact that Katherine initiated physical contact with someone she didn't know if she could fully trust was the reason behind the fear.

"Nah, I just use the cheap stuff Anne gets." Katherine laughed, staring up at Jane. She bit her lip, was this the moment Catherine told her to seize? It was innocent enough, and Jane was certainly relaxed enough to not freak out… hopefully. "Jane?"

"Hm?"

"Um… I just wanna say thank you. You uh… you showed me that maybe… there _are_ people in this world that quite possibly don't want anything from me. That they're people in this world who just want to be there for me even though there's nothing in it. I should probably have said this back at Big Ben, but… well, I don't know, it didn't feel like the right time for it."

"... Actually, there's something that I should have told you before and honestly? This is definitely the worst time but it's more of putting it out there and also if I don't say anything somehow my roommates would find out and then your cousin will come for my head and-"

"Jane! It's alright! Remember Lin-Lin's party? I told you that you can tell me anything, and it still stands. I won't freak out and-"

"I'm a lesbian."

"... Wow, now _that's_ the smoothest coming out I've ever heard." Katherine remarked, staring up at Jane, who was staring back at her. Her grey eyes reflected an intensity that Katherine had never seen before, it was pure fear, and she could tell that Jane was _truly_ trusting her with this. "So… who else knows about it?"

"I have the feeling that everyone else knows, but you're the first one that I've actually came out to." Jane mumbled, averting her eyes away from Katherine. The latter sat up, which made Jane fear for the worst. "I _knew_ it, I knew I shouldn't have said anything especially since this can easily be perceived as breaking your trust and-"

"What? No! I got up because my back kinda hurts, and also because I want to look you in the eyes and tell you that you're very brave for coming out as well as to tell you that I won't betray your trust." Katherine said, taking Jane's hands in hers. She knew that despite what Jane had told everyone, she was still influenced by her religious upbringing and that coming out wasn't an easy feat. Plus she only told Katherine, which meant that Jane placed her utmost trust in her. Or at least, saw her as the closest friend. "I'm not gonna see you differently, you're still you."

"... Even though I admitted it in a questionably intimate setting?"

"Yep, all I'm seeing is a super brave and compassionate queen with eyes of silver and no one should tell you otherwise." Katherine gave her a nod as Jane broke into gentle chuckles, relief washing over her. "Thank you for telling me this, I know it's not easy."

"... I didn't really tell you _why_ I've gotten bullied back in secondary school right?"

"You don't have to share if you don't feel com-"

"I think I owe you this- no, I owe _myself_ this. I can't just keep on running away from it." Jane wondered why she chose what society perceived to be the most romantic day of the year to tell her story, and shuddered at the thought of how inappropriate it was. Still, she owed herself the truth, and no matter how painful it was, she had to face it head on. "I have- no, I _had_ a close friend. She reminded me of you, friendly, outgoing, everyone liked her. I thought I could trust her with everything, so one day in Secondary 3… I told her. I told her that I preferred girls in the same way she preferred boys. I _thought_ she would at least keep it a secret, I trusted her enough to keep it between us…"

"... I'm sorry that she betrayed your trust."

"No, I should have known better. The students there… they were more religious than the average person, I knew that day that I would be ruining our friendship. I just didn't know it would hurt so much. Honestly? It's wrong for me to feel this way, for me to have liked her the way I did back then… but I know that I'm just denying who I am. I have to accept that I'm only romantically interested in women, I can't hide behind a set of morals that I was taught to follow. For me to move on… I have to find a way to be in both worlds."

"Jane, you don't _have_ to force yourself to move forward. It's okay to go at your own pace, it's okay to still be hurt years after. Time will heal all wounds, just that different people need different periods of time to heal." Katherine replied, squeezing Jane's hands with her own. She could feel Jane's nervousness seeping through her clammy hands, and the way they twitched occasionally hinted that Jane was doing her best to not tear her hands out from Katherine's and bolt out of the house. "I'm sorry that you had to endure all that back then, I'm sorry that she rejected you as a friend, I'm sorry that she rejected your unsaid feelings."

"There's nothing to be sorry about. I… really should've known better than to admit my homosexuality in a secluded library of a Catholic school." Jane managed a wry smile, sighing deeply as she accepted Katherine's sincerity. "... Thank you though, I feel… slightly better by saying this."

"Anything for you." Katherine carefully replied, during the conversation she had realised that it would be an inappropriate time to confess that she viewed Jane in a way that was less than platonic. The last thing she wanted was for Jane to believe that Katherine confessed to her because she liked women, when the truth was that Katherine liked Jane who just so happened to identify as a woman. "You're a wonderful woman, and thank you again. For trusting me with your secrets, for trusting me in general, for being there for me."

"Katherine…" An alarm was heard coming from Jane's phone, alerting her that it was time for her to go. Katherine nearly jumped, she wasn't aware that Jane had set an alarm for whatever reason. "Oh, sorry. I have a morning class tomorrow and-"

"No! No no no, it's okay! Wasn't expecting that but it's fine! I completely forgot that tomorrow's a school day." Katherine waved a hand in response, watching as Jane got up and picked up the paper bag containing her gift. She followed Jane all the way to the door, planning to send her off. She wanted to wish her a safe trip back home, but instead, she blurted out her inner most thoughts that she had planned on locking away. "May I kiss you?"

"Oh! I-"

"No! Fuck! I mean! Excuse me while I regret my life choices!" Katherine rushed to apologise, she genuinely didn't mean to make Jane feel uncomfortable. She racked her brain to find a proper way to express her sincerest apologies, but couldn't come up with anything. "J-Jane, I'm so so-"

"I don't mind." Jane replied, a faint blush dusting her cheeks that went nearly unnoticed by Katherine. The latter gulped, was Jane giving her permission because of her kind nature, or was she allowed to hope that despite neither of them explicitly saying their feelings, they actually felt the same way? "Katherine? D-Did I… did I say something-"

"I-I'm fine! I uh… I'm just gonna… um… do it here…" Katherine felt flustered, similar to the time when she fell in love with her music teacher. She started to panic, what if for the first time, she had misjudged a woman she considered to be very important to her? She was terrible at judging men, and had four examples to reflect upon. Women? She had none, and it scared her. She didn't want to be wrong about Jane, and the possibility scared her. Jane patiently waited, though the torment in Katherine's pink eyes worried her.

"You don't have to go through with it." Jane said, concerned that she had indirectly dug up Katherine's past. She never knew the full details of Katherine's troubles, in fact whatever she knew were mere assumptions on her part, nothing was explicitly said by the woman herself. "It's alright Katherine, whatever it is… I may not know the full story, but I'll always be with you every step of the way."

"T-Thanks Jane." Katherine unconsciously hugged Jane for comfort, shedding a few tears at the latter's understanding. Jane stood still, awkwardly patting Katherine's back. She knew that Katherine needed some form of comfort, but she was too scared to provide her with physical comfort lest the younger woman misunderstood her intentions. _'I always screw everything up… I'm sorry Jane, you're definitely better off without me…'_

* * *

Jane opened the door to her house, and was greeted with silent darkness. She heaved a sigh of relief, a silent house meant that Catalina and Anne were still not back from their date yet, which meant that she had a chance of getting some sleep before they went at it. She switched on the living room light and placed the paper bag onto the table, opening it to see the top view of something black. She carried the present out from the back, revealing itself to be a mini plague doctor plush toy.

"I'll call you… Edward. That sounds like a nice name for a plague doctor, don't you think?" The doctor didn't reply, as expected of a plush toy. Jane giggled as she set the plush toy onto the sofa, preparing to take a picture to commemorate the newest addition to the family. She picked up the handbag that she left beside the paper bag and searched for her phone, to no avail. Jane immediately realised that she had forgotten her phone at Katherine's place, which prompted her to grab her essentials and make her way towards the bus stop.

After 15 minutes of waiting, the bus pulled up at the bus stop. Jane considered herself lucky that she managed to catch the last bus, something she had learnt after the bus driver commented that there were usually no passengers on that particular service's last bus. Jane wondered if Katherine would allow her to spend the night at her place, and then thought about Edward being left alone in the living room with Leafy nearby. She felt herself smiling at that thought, it was an extremely sweet gesture on Katherine's part.

She got off the bus, staring at the flat where Katherine lived and made her way towards it. On her way up via the lift, Jane frowned. What if Katherine was already sleeping? Or in the shower? Wouldn't she be inconveniencing the Theatre major if she turned up again? She regretted coming back, she should've asked Catalina to help contact Katherine about her missing phone and asked her to hold onto it until the next day. Jane shook her head, she was already there to retrieve her phone, might as well go through with it.

She made her way towards the unit and gently knocked on the door, and it creaked open much to her surprise. Her surprise soon turned to horror as she recalled how all three residents constantly ensured that the front door was locked, to the point that it resembled paranoia. She gently pushed the door open further, muffled voices attracting her attention. She sincerely hoped that Katherine genuinely forgot to lock the door behind her after she left, and that it wasn't her worst nightmare.

_'Please Lord in Heaven, please let it be my imagination… please…!'_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Just so you know, Edward is a Mini Squishy Plague Doctor found at https://www.squishable.com/squishables/mini_plague_doctor_7.html
> 
> 1\. Should Catalina have a physical confrontation with the man while queuing up to get the zoo admission tickets? Were there other ways she could've resolved the issue at hand?
> 
> 2\. Is it right to lower the self-esteem of someone you hate? Can this ever be justified in any situation?
> 
> 3\. Should Anne have given Katherine access to all her passwords? Explain.
> 
> 4\. Given what we know about Katherine's past through previous conversations as well as Anna's explanation of what Code Black is, why do you think Katherine invited Jane inside the flat unit clad in only her lingerie?
> 
> 5\. Is it considered shameful for locals to visit tourist attractions in their own country? Why do you think some locals hold a stigma towards other locals visiting their country's tourist attractions?
> 
> 6\. Was Jane's past a result of her own mistakes, or an unfortunate experience created by the environment Jane was brought up in? Explain.


	14. Chapter 14

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay so this chapter contains attempted rape and mentions of blood. I won't tag this story with the 'rape/non-con' tag because that tag indicates that the act DID happen successfully, when in this chapter, it WASN'T successful.

"Seriously?! Of all times to send the damn video…" Katherine muttered curses as she switched off the light to her bedroom. It was around an hour before midnight, and Katherine was grumbling over how her lecturer sent out a video that she was supposed to watch for her module on Monday. "To think I thought that I could sleep early for once…"

Katherine played the video, barely able to focus on its contents. Had it not been a video containing scenes that she was supposed to perform the next day, she would've simply ignored it and went to sleep. She sighed in frustration as she increased the volume of the video until it reached its maximum, and promptly swore at how she _still_ couldn't hear what the scene was about. There were a few instances when she closed her eyes only to open them again, the video was just too boring for her to continue watching.

Eventually, she decided to watch the video again in the morning. She didn't know whether she should count herself fortunate that most of her classes are in the afternoon, but either way, she was heartened to know that she still had time to watch the video and somewhat prepare herself for class. Katherine paused the video, but before she could exit, she suddenly felt a constricting feeling around her neck. She gasped, reaching out for her neck and felt a strange roughness around it.

"Missed me?" A chilling voice asked, sparking horrifying recognition in Katherine's green eyes as she struggled to breathe. The hand closest to the nightstand tapped about on the hard surface, hoping to grab something that could be used as a weapon. Her fingers grazed a metallic object, and Katherine clenched it tightly before driving it into the hands around her neck. A howl of pain was heard, the tight grip around Katherine's neck now gone. Katherine wheezed, doing her damndest to catch her breath. "You slut!"

"What the fuck are you doing in my house Thomas?!" As Katherine's eyes slowly got used to the darkness, she could make out a faint outline of the man hunched over in a corner of her bedroom, muttering curses directed at the woman. She panicked, how did he even get in? She was so sure she locked the doors, and to think she had just assured Anne that she was safe at home. "How… why are you even here?!"

"You _ignored_ me. You _rejected_ me. You _played_ with me!" Thomas roared, incensed by the question. Katherine knew that she should call for help, but she also knew that during the time she called for help, be it to the police or any of her friends, Thomas would certainly use this window of opportunity to harm her. Katherine grimaced, she was armed with whatever she left on the nightstand and if memory served her right, it was the letter opener Jane had gifted her. "You'll _pay_ for wasting my time!"

"Go away!" Katherine brandished the letter opener, immediately dropping it as Thomas lunged for her, nearly crushing her hand with his grip. The letter opener dropped to the floor with a clang, and she was back to the previous scenario. She thrashed about in his grip, scratching his hands in a desperate attempt. She could feel the grip loosening, though she quickly realised why. "Stop… please…!"

"Not until you've given me what I've been missing the past months." Katherine could make out a cruel smile on her former friend's face as he started to pull down her shorts, confirming her thoughts. She proceeded to kick him in between his legs, with Thomas grunting in pain. He didn't release his grip on Katherine's neck however, and only did so when he was kicked a second time at the exact same spot. "You bitch!"

 _'I have to defend myself..! Where's the opener…?!'_ Katherine rolled off the bed and blindly searched for the letter opener, a brief ray of hope shining on her as her fingers touched metal. Her hope was dashed when Thomas recovered from the pain and stomped on her hand, preventing her from fully grabbing it. Katherine's heart sank as she felt the cold metal disappear from her fingers, and was lifted off the floor and thrown back to the bed. Instead of warm hands, she could feel the tip of the letter opener pressed against her neck. "... Let me go… _please_ …"

"No! You think you're so clever, don't you?! All those times you flirted with me… all those times you ran to me… was everything just a fucking game to you?!" Thomas roared, pressing the letter opener towards Katherine's neck. She could acutely feel the tip against her, any further and he would draw blood. In all the shows she watched, the victims that argued with the criminals died earlier than the ones who remained silent. It was probably the same in real life, but she had a feeling that either option she chose, she would meet a bad end.

"I… I _never_ once did any of those to you."

"Lies!" Katherine could feel something warm trickling down her neck, and started to tear up at the accusation. She felt the same way she did on the day she first met Jane, helpless and terrified. Katherine wanted to laugh, laugh at how despite her predicament, all she could think about was how much she _thought_ she had come, only to realise that she was no different from the woman back then. "I don't care, you'll be giving me what I want."

"Thomas, y-you're better than this." A lie, but Katherine hoped that appealing to his sense of morals would help her. Or at least, she _hoped_ that he still had some morals. "Is being in a loveless relationship really what you want? You can… you can just walk away… a-and I won't tell anyone about this. O-Okay? Tonight doesn't have to happen…"

"You really are a fool. Did you seriously believe that I wanted to date you?! Did you _actually_ think that I _liked_ you?! You're nothing but something to relieve stress. Just because you're sexier than most doesn't mean that you can make a fool out of me!"

"T-Then why didn't you just _say_ so from the beginning?!" Katherine shivered as Thomas used his free hand to roam about her body, his fingers scratching against her painfully. She froze as he successfully pulled her shorts down, wanting to kick him a third time but couldn't. She was paralysed with fear and even if she wasn't, she didn't want to die. "Why?! Y-You could've just said that you wanted it! Why go through all the trouble of being my friend?!"

"... I _thought_ you'll willingly give it to me if I did something nice for you. But no, you rather shag random people that couldn't give two shits about you than to sleep with someone who treated you well!" Katherine could feel Thomas hooking his fingers onto her underwear and tugging it down as hard as he could, causing a rip in fabric. She could visualise his mocking smile as he dragged out the entire process, it was all a game to him, a game with the prize that he felt he was so cruelly denied by Katherine. "How does it feel _love_? How does it feel to have your cousin having his way with you? Does the taboo nature of it make you tremble?"

"I… you..."

" _Tell me_!" Katherine whimpered as Thomas poked her harder, making out his cruel features through tears. She remained silent, waiting for him to relax by just a fraction. He didn't relax like what Katherine hoped, but she could tell that he was adjusting his grip on the letter opener's handle given the blade's shift of position on her neck. That was enough for her, and in that split second, she made her move.

"Graaaaaaah!" With a cry of determination, Katherine grabbed hold of Thomas's hand and wrestled the letter opener away from her neck. He was stronger, but Katherine knew that all she needed to do was to create enough distance between the letter opener and her neck before she could make her escape. Unfortunately for her, Thomas ripped his hand free from hers, and in the process slashed her neck. She immediately held her neck, her hands eventually growing warm and wet with blood while Thomas did something she couldn't see. _'It… hurts… it hurts so much… so this is how… it feels to hurt someone else's feelings…'_

"Katherine!" She could hear the door being thrown open, and words started to blur together as her vision started to fade. To her, everything was melting into the darkness. The voices, the faint light, her blood… everything was the same to her, everything became one with the dark. The last thing she could make out was someone desperately calling out her name, begging her to open her eyes. Katherine wanted to listen to the comforting voice, she dearly did. However, she couldn't and allowed herself to succumb to the darkness, an apology said only to herself.

_'... I'm sorry…'_

* * *

John grimaced as he made his way to the hospital, he had received a call from his colleagues that he was required to take the statements from witnesses. He wasn't informed what they witnessed, but assumed that it was something minor. There was a recent spike in cases of victims suffering from minor injuries demanding to go to the hospital, and as much as it was a waste of resources, the paramedics usually obliged.

He made his way to the emergency room after being informed by the receptionist that the witnesses he needed to see were there, and started to feel guilty for assuming that the victim suffered from minor injuries. On his way there, he accidentally collided with a woman of average height, and immediately apologised. It was only when he took a good look at the woman did he change his tone, and internally groaned at what he was assigned to do.

"Don't tell me Ms Boleyn's inside the emergency room again." Catalina frowned, she could understand why he would assume that Anne was the one in trouble. It wasn't his first meeting with her, or Catalina by extension. He was there to take her statement when Anne had gotten her throat slit, and was also the one who took their statements after the first break-in. That didn't mean that she appreciated his tone, a woman was fighting for her life and he showed apathy towards her. "... Is Ms Howard alright? I understand that they're very close."

"We don't know, Kat's the one who got her throat slit." Catalina muttered, crossing her arms and glaring at the man. John coughed awkwardly, realising that he had jumped to assumptions. "... Bo's worried for her, and Jane… Jane's a wreck."

"Jane?" The name reminded John of two women in his lives, one a close friend, the other his sister. He hoped that it was neither, he didn't know if he could remain professional if it was a Jane he knew. John was fairly sure that it wasn't his friend, she was still in Kent settling her divorce with her philandering husband. That left his sister, whom he knew that she was in London but have not seen for years. "... I see, were you also present at the scene?"

"Depends how you look at it Mr John." Catalina never felt comfortable addressing the policeman that way, but she could never see his identification label as it was always hidden behind his vest. John didn't really mind either way, and preferred to be addressed by his first name instead of his surname. "What's the definition of being present at the scene?"

"Have you visited the area around the time the crime happened?"

"Yeah, I was the one who called for the ambulance while Bo… actually, will she be charged?"

"We'll need all the evidence before we can make a decision."

"And Jane?"

"Same as what I've just said." John frowned, he didn't receive much details about the crime. All his colleague said was that blood was involved as well as a few women and a man. Usually, they would write it off as one of the women being jealous towards the man being interested in someone else but John suspected otherwise. He didn't know whether it was past experience on his part, but thanks to his encounters with Anne, he felt that it was more likely that the man was jealous towards either cousin. "Anyways, can you tell me what you saw?"

"Bo and I were coming back from a date and saw Jane making her way to Bo's flat. We called out to her, but she didn't hear us. Since we were going back to the flat too, we decided to shadow her and surprise her outside the door or something."

"I see, were you expecting the unit to be empty or…?"

"We knew Kat would be at home, and we figured that Jane was looking for her. I'm not sure why Jane went back, but either way we followed behind her. There were two lifts there, and Jane took one of them so we took the other one. Upon arriving, we discovered that the door was open."

"And that was a cause of alarm because…?"

"You can't be this daft right?"

"I know doors are usually closed, but as a policeman, I have to ask all questions, even the silly ones." Catalina nodded sharply, indicating her displeasure. John remained firm, and jotted down the remaining words from her last response. "Well?"

"... Because ever since the last break-in, all of them make it a point to always lock the door. They always ensured that the door was locked securely before going to sleep. It's frequent and thorough enough to suspect them of OCD."

"Alright, who are the ones living in that unit? Full names please."

"Anne Boleyn, Katherine Howard, Anna von Cleves."

"Okay, same as last time… right. What did you two do when you saw that the door was open?"

"There were noises in there, and Bo stormed in without ensuring that there wasn't any danger present at the doorway. I switched on the light in the hallway and the living room in case there were any hidden dangers. Bo went into Kat's bedroom, and there was more screaming. By the time I entered the bedroom… well… she was standing over a bloody man. I slapped Bo to snap her out from her… head-smashing while Jane was begging Kat to stay with her. That's when I called the ambulance."

"Just to confirm, the man was bleeding too right? It's not an expression?" John asked, noting down Catalina's statement. He wondered what was it with his affinity to cases where victims either got their throats slit, or victims of rape. Catalina nodded, and John finished taking down the statement. "... Right so… I'm going to have to get the other two statements. Are they… do you think they're-"

"You can try Bo, though her statement would most definitely be more passionate than mine. Jane… do you really have to get hers by today?"

"I know it's late-"

"Not that, surely even you can guess that her mental state is in a fragile place now."

"... I understand, but we have to get the statements while they're still fresh." John sighed, that was the problem of being an enforcer of the law. They were supposed to be cold and professional, yet his heart broke whenever he had to collect the statements of witnesses, usually extremely close to the victims. He had a duty to do, but even he wasn't sure if he could remain calm and firm while doing so. "I can do Ms Boleyn's first, but the other one… kindly inform her to prepare herself."

"Fine, stay here while we switch out." Catalina reluctantly agreed, she could tell that John's hands were tied. She made her way towards the emergency room, praying that Katherine would make it through the operation. She knew it would crush Anne if her cousin didn't make it and Jane… Catalina shuddered, she didn't want to imagine what would Jane do if Katherine died. She was the one who held her in her arms while the latter bled, no doubt it would be traumatising for her and from what Catalina knew about her friend, Jane might commit suicide shortly after. _'Lord, I know we haven't been in touch lately but please, I'm begging you. Don't do this to Jane. Don't do this to any of them, they don't deserve this.'_

* * *

Anne was doing her best to not break down outside the emergency room, she had to be strong for Jane, who was clearly not dealing well with the current situation. Yes, she was worried about Katherine and she couldn't bear to lose her cousin, but Anne knew that breaking down in front of Jane wasn't going to help anyone. She had to do her best to control her emotions while the surgeons did their best to save Katherine, she _had_ to. Catalina had approached her, bringing her aside and whispering to her that John was here to collect their statements.

"Are you kidding me?! He wants to collect hers too?! Look at her!" Anne hissed, gesturing to Jane, who was blubbering about how it was all her fault that Katherine was fighting for her life on the operation table. Catalina pinched the bridge of her nose, she agreed with Anne but she also knew that John was just doing his duty. "Can't he leave Janey alone?!"

"He can't, but he's allowing us to delay it. Mind you, he'll have to collect hers after yours." Anne started to swear at the man, cursing his family and everything he could love. Catalina sighed, her voice trying to be as measured as possible. "Anne, please. Do this for Kat at least."

"... Fine." Anne growled as she stormed towards the direction where the policeman was waiting, while Catalina took over and did her best to comfort Jane, even if it was simply just by being nearby. Anne had half the mind to punch the daylights out of John, but she knew she shouldn't. She was on thin ice after the Holbein incident, and she certainly didn't need a reason for the police to throw her into jail. The man curtly nodded to acknowledge her presence, his lips forming a thin line as an indication to the situation at hand. "Let's get this over with."

"You're… surprisingly calm." John commented, he was expecting Anne to be furious or crying. More specifically, he expected her to show _some_ form of emotion. Anne scowled in response, and John immediately regretted his comment. "I apologise. First of all, tell me what happened from the beginning."

"What, you wanna know what I did during the day? You're wasting my time."

"Ms Boleyn, I understand that you're doing your best to cope with the situation but I need your cooperation." Anne glowered at him, while the policeman did his best to be patient with her. If any of his siblings was the one lying in the emergency room, he imagined that he would be an utter mess and would prove to be nearly incapable of cooperating with the authorities. "Please."

"... Cat and I were coming back from a date. We agreed to head back to my place because Janey had a morning class today, and didn't want to disturb her."

"And both of you were okay with disturbing your cousin?"

"... Look, for all the shit Janey had to put up with, she still doesn't have to put up with us shagging each other. Yet." John said nothing, doing his best to remain composed at the explanation. "Anyways yeah, we went back and saw her from a distance. Cat called out to her but she ignored us, or couldn't hear us. Either way she didn't turn to look at us so I suggested that we sneak up on her and scare the living hell out of her outside my place."

"And then? What happened?"

"We went up to my place, and saw that the door's open. None of us leave the door unlocked, let alone open. I mean we used to because our memories are shit, but after that damn break-in… anyways you understand what I'm trying to say right?"

"The door was open, yes. What happened next?"

"I went in of course! There were noises from Kitty's room, so I went there first. I saw Thomas on the floor, groaning in pain. Turned on the lights, and saw Janey cradling Kitty in her arms. Janey's hands were all bloody and pressed to Kitty's neck, and I realised that Thomas cut Kitty's throat like what Henry did to me."

"I see, and what did you do after witnessing such a scene?"

"Thomas… there was this silver thing near him. It was a bit red on the side, and I picked it up and bashed his head in. I just… kept on pounding his head with that thing. I remember blood flying, and some squishy sounds. But the loudest was Janey begging for Kitty to stay with her, to not leave her. And I just… I just hit my cousin harder. I hit him, again, and again, and again until Cat slapped me until I dropped that thing."

"You said that you hit your cousin… called Thomas?"

"Thomas Culpeper. He hung out with Henry, you know that bastard. And… honestly I don't know why he hung out with Henry when he treated Kitty well. Until I found out that they had a fucking falling out last year, that was how Kitty met Janey. She… she said that she felt someone was watching her but played it off as paranoia… I mean… I told her that it probably wasn't but… god it's all my fault. I… I should've been more insistent. I should've insisted to her that it's not just something she dreamt of…!"

"... So you're saying that Culpeper has a motive?"

"I-I guess? Look, I… I really don't know the full details. Only Janey does. Every time I try to ask Kitty for more details, she tenses up and… and just… evades the topic. All I know is that… is that whatever happened, it's… it's probably on a similar scale as the rest."

"What scale?" Anne had grabbed him by the collar, tears flowing freely down her face as she sobbed while glared at John. "Look, I'm just trying to-"

"Will you stop asking so many questions when you know the answers to most of them?! You _know_ what scale I'm referring to! You know _damn_ well what I'm trying to say here! How can you expect me to tell you with a straight face what Kitty went through?! I'm not her okay?! I can't tell you someone's trauma as though you just asked what's the fucking time! Do you think it's easy for me to tell you that she experienced sexual abuse and that I could've have done something?! _Do you_?!"

"... My apologies." John muttered, he knew that it was best for him to walk away. Anne was in no state to continue her statement, and John had enough information from her. That left him with Jane, who made him nauseous. The thought that the last witness had the same name as his close friend- no, as his sister, really made him uncomfortable. He wanted to inform his colleagues that he couldn't do it anymore, that he was ultimately unprofessional and just wanted to get away from the sickly sterile environment. "... I'll have to take her statement."

"... I'll tell her to see you."

"You can provide her emotional support while she's giving her statement." John offered, he could imagine that Jane was not in the best state to give her statement given both Catalina's and Anne's observations. Anne shook her head, surprising him. "Really? I thought…"

"As much as we want to, we'll probably make things harder for her. You think we can resist not interrupting?"

"A fair point, thank you for your consideration." Anne trudged back to the direction of the emergency room, with the intention to inform Jane about John. The policeman sighed, he didn't like playing the villain when it came to emotional moments. He had to remain neutral, something that he was struggling with given his encounters with Anne and Catalina. He knew it wasn't easy to give a statement when someone close to the witnesses was fighting for their lives, and he had once seen them wail when the victim had passed. It was a horrifying sight, much worse than being injured. _'... I should contact Jane soon, how long has it been since we spoke…?'_

* * *

Jane stared blankly at the tiled floor, she could make out whispers from the doctors that passed her by. She had cried as she held a dying Katherine in her arms, and cried harder as she waited outside the emergency room, praying that the younger woman would make it out alive. She was horrified, so horrified when she saw so much blood on Katherine's neck. She barely registered that her own hands were stained in blood, a result after she tried to stop the bleeding.

She blamed herself, blamed herself for leaving Katherine to begin with. Had she not left, she could've stopped Thomas from even making it as far as Katherine's bedroom. He managed to break into both the unit and the bedroom, and the realisation troubled her. What would have happened if she didn't leave her phone at Katherine's place? If she hadn't returned to retrieve her phone… Jane tried not to think about that scenario. She was already distraught over how she had caused Katherine to be lying on an operation table, and it was all her fault. It was all her fault for leaving her alone despite knowing that someone was watching her. She should've known, she should've pieced them all together, that Thomas was the one stalking her. That Katherine wasn't being paranoid, that it was all _her_ fault for not doing more to protect Katherine.

"Janey, the cop's here to collect your statement." Anne softly spoke, gently placing a hand on Jane's shoulder. Jane wanted to cry, but she knew she had no more tears to shed. She didn't know why Anne wasn't out for her blood, why wasn't she screaming about how she failed to protect Katherine. She was with her the whole day, ensuring Katherine's safety was _her_ responsibility. She couldn't understand, why hadn't Anne slammed her against a wall and attempted to rip her hair out? Why wasn't she being strangled? Anne had the right, after all it was _her_ who failed to protect Katherine, not Anne. "Janey?"

"Leave her alone Bo." Catalina replied, a gentle look directed at Jane. She could only partially empathise with her friend, Anne didn't have stalkers after all. But Catalina could understand how it felt to see someone dying in your arms, her throat slit as she stared at you though tears, begging to save her. No, she thought to herself, Katherine was barely conscious by the time Jane arrived. "Jane, do you want us to tell him to collect your statement another day?"

"... I'll do it now." Jane replied, her body numb from the event. Anne and Catalina nodded, respecting her decision. They informed her that the policeman was waiting around the corner, probably to give them space to be alone without a stranger hovering nearby. Jane stood up, almost collapsing due to her legs being numb. She stiffly made her way to where he was waiting, and felt a mix of emotions upon seeing him. "... John."

"Jane." Her brother said, the name full of emotions as he did his best to keep his feelings in check. He was still on duty, and right now, he was a policeman, not Jane's brother. "... I'm sorry."

"I'm fine. I always am." The words were mostly hollow, with a tinge of bitterness in it. Jane didn't know why, why she was starting to be true to herself now of all times. Maybe it was because of what had happened to someone she loved that broke her, that caused her to drop her facade that she was there for everyone without any repercussions on her part. John was taken aback, it was the first time he had seen his sister so vulnerable, so relatable, so _human_. "You wanted to take my statement, yes?"

"Correct. First of all, why did you go back to Ms Howard's place?"

"I realised I forgot my phone at her place when I got back home, so I went back."

"How did you reach her place?"

"I don't understand."

"I mean did you walk? Or took a bus? Or hailed a taxi?"

"Bus, I took the last bus heading in that direction." John nodded, noting how tired his sister sounded. He wanted to call it a day, and just hug her but he couldn't. He was still processing how Jane had changed the last time he truly saw her, which was before he left for London. That was almost ten years ago, and from then on, he only saw her on Christmas. He thought they could meet up for tea once Jane came to London, but they never did. "Anything else?"

"Right, on your way to Ms Howard's flat, did you notice anything?"

"On my way… no. It was dark and quiet, nobody was there."

"Did you take the lift or the stairs?"

"Lift, it was just me."

"I see. What did you do when you arrived at her doorstep?"

"... I knocked on the door, and it just opened. I knew something was wrong then, it was common knowledge among us that they always locked the door. _Always_."

"What did you do afterwards?"

"... There were sounds in there, so I went in. I went in the direction of those sounds… and I saw the outline of a man in Katherine's bedroom. I couldn't see very well, but… but I knew that he was there to harm her or… I saw something flicker for a brief second, and I immediately ran to get that."

"What did you use that object for?"

"I… I threw it at the man. It probably hit him given that it took a long time for that thing to drop. Or maybe it didn't. The light came on afterwards, and I saw… I…" Jane trailed off, clearly not wanting to continue. John felt his heart shatter, he couldn't bear to witness his sister in so much pain. He felt horrible for doing his duty, but it was necessary. He had to prod her, even though he wished otherwise.

"Ms Seymour, what did you see?" John asked, it was the only way. The only way he could do his duty to the best of his ability was to separate himself from Jane, and to do that was to address her as a civilian. Jane said nothing for a while, which forced him to prod her once more. "Ms Seymour, please answer me. What did you see?"

"Katherine… was bleeding on her bed. Blood all over… over her neck… black line across…"

"And what did you do upon seeing her?"

"What did I do? What did _I_ do?! John, look at me! What have I done?! I failed to protect her! Look at my hands! Blood all over, and it's all my fault! I should've done more... I should've been more careful… I shouldn't have left her alone…" Jane suddenly lashed out at her brother, her grey eyes containing a fury that he had never seen before. He recognised that she wasn't angry at him, but rather herself. What he didn't understand was why, why his sister, who always tried her best to help others and succeeded, was blaming herself for something that was in no way her fault. "It's all my fault John. I failed Anne. I failed Katherine. I failed everyone."

"Jane!" Catalina called out, running up to them. Jane couldn't bear to face her friend, not when she was to blame for the incident. John chose to hug her, it was the only thing he could think of in an attempt to console his sister. Catalina put two and two together and realised that the policeman was the very same John Jane had mentioned before. "Good news, Kat's alive! Barely, but yeah they said that she'll live."

"... W-What's the bad news?" At this point, John was concerned that Jane would suffer a mental breakdown upon hearing the bad news. He didn't know what could be worse than seeing someone close to you die, apart from them being in a coma or being disabled. He had seen victims being disabled afterwards, and usually they had trouble dealing with the sudden changes. He gulped, he hoped Katherine wasn't in a coma, he was close enough to at least shed a few tears if either Anne or Katherine died.

"Uh… unless you count the fact that she's going to have to live with a scar like Bo bad news, there's nothing really. Vocal cords miraculously intact, breathing's stable… I think. To sum it up, Kat's really lucky to have survived this."

"It's all my fault that Katherine's going to wake up every night relieving tonight all over again! All my fault Lina, it's all on me. Why am I not the one lying on that operating table? Why am I even still here talking, pitying myself and making myself feel better for not being there for the one I actually love?!" Jane started to sob into John's uniform, with John hastily scribbling down a string of numbers and tore the paper, handing it to Catalina. She nodded, there were a lot of things for them to unpack, especially Jane's mental health.

But for now, everything was fine.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> 1\. Why do people (regardless of gender and sexuality) like Culpeper think that they deserve to receive something in return for befriending others? Explain.
> 
> 2\. John experienced the dilemma between doing his duty and comforting his sister as a brother. If you were in his position, what would you do and why?
> 
> 3\. Do you think that everything will eventually be alright for the characters? Why or why not?


	15. Chapter 15

**[protect the babies squad]**

_**[7.43 AM]** _

**Mentally Dead:** Before any of you say anything, Kat's fine

 **KweenCleves:** wait wht happened to her???

 **Mentally Dead:** Thomas broke into your house and her bedroom

 **Regrets &Coffee: **Oh god, is she safe?!

 **that boleyn girl:** she can breathe frm her neck now like me

 **KweenCleves:** WHT??????

 **KweenCleves:** WTF WHEN DID THIS HAPPEN

 **Mentally Dead:** Around 2300 last night

 **Regrets &Coffee: **And you didn't THINK to inform us?!

 **that boleyn girl:** look we wanted u two to enjoy ur date

 **that boleyn girl:** ur pining is starting to go out of hand

 **that boleyn girl:** n honestly we need some cheer aft this…

 **Regrets &Coffee: **Howard's wellbeing is more important than us!

 **KweenCleves:** EXACTLY

 **KweenCleves:** WHT MADE U TWO THINK THT NOT TELLING US THT KAT GOT HER THROAT CUT WAS A GD IDEA????

 **Mentally Dead:** Because we didn't want you two to freak out?!

 **Mentally Dead:** Jane LITERALLY broke down okay?!

 **Mentally Dead:** It's traumatic enough for her

 **Regrets &Coffee: **How the fuck does Seymour know about it before us?!

 **Mentally Dead:** She was the first one to find Kat

 **that boleyn girl:** n held her as she bled

 **that boleyn girl:** or were her hands on the neck

 **that boleyn girl:** u both get the idea rite

 **KweenCleves:** ok fine so wtf r we supposed to do frm here on

 **Regrets &Coffee: **Surely you don't expect us to pretend this didn't happen because it clearly did!

 **Mentally Dead:** I don't know

 **that boleyn girl:** i called the sch to tell them abt kitty

 **that boleyn girl:** rite now shes in a medically induced coma or smth

 **Regrets &Coffee: **Wait, she has brain damage?!

 **Mentally Dead:** She did lose quite a bit of blood and probably oxygen supply to the brain was cut

 **Mentally Dead:** I don't know okay?!

 **Mentally Dead:** I'm learning how to be a mental doctor, not a body doctor!

 **Regrets &Coffee: **I'm sorry… I'm just…

 **Regrets &Coffee: **Look, the last conversation I had with Howard at all was her asking me how to come out to Seymour and admit that she's romantically into that damn slushie addict.

 **Regrets &Coffee: **And I just brushed her off.

 **KweenCleves:** cathy…

 **KweenCleves:** hows jane?

 **Mentally Dead:** She's with Bo

 **that boleyn girl:** she asked me if she cld hv a slushie

 **that boleyn girl:** i said yes but i hv to follow her

 **that boleyn girl:** she agreed

 **that boleyn girl:** i need yall to tell me smth

 **that boleyn girl:** am i allowed to sign her up for therapy

 **that boleyn girl:** i hv a mental bitchs no

 **Mentally Dead:** You should consult John about that

 **Mentally Dead:** Also, we met her brother

 **Mentally Dead:** Apparently the cop who usually has to put up with us is her brother

 **KweenCleves:** waittttt

 **KweenCleves:** we r talking abt tht hot one whom we thunk had a thing for kat but then found out hes gay rite

 **Regrets &Coffee: **Liebling… 'thunk' isn't a word…

 **KweenCleves:** shhhhh lemme hv this one

 **that boleyn girl:** yep

 **KweenCleves:** fuckkk

 **Regrets &Coffee: **How many cups has Seymour consumed?

 **that boleyn girl:** she just chugged a slushie in front of me without screaming

 **that boleyn girl:** n shes on her eights

 **that boleyn girl:** [slushiemess.jpg]

 **that boleyn girl:** i meannnnn she looked adorbs when she first started but now shes just pathetic

 **Regrets &Coffee: **Dear god, you should really consult her brother about that therapy then…

 **Mentally Dead:** Already on it

 **Mentally Dead:** Also Bo?

 **that boleyn girl:** yea?

 **Mentally Dead:** If any of the Seymours are resisting therapy, I'll say that it was all your idea

 **that boleyn girl:** gurl i just want janey to be more ok

 **that boleyn girl:** like maybe a mental bitch can provide her with some glue

 **that boleyn girl:** n beg her to fix herself

 **that boleyn girl:** ill just shut up now yea ill claims respondodbalty

* * *

"Seymour? It's almost time for you to leave." Catherine said as Jane laid on the sofa, hugging Edward tightly as she stared at the ceiling. It was Sunday, and John had agreed with the rest that his sister needed therapy. What he didn't know was that Jane needed the therapy for other reasons apart from the possible PTSD and guilt resulting from Katherine's neck. "Seymour…"

"... Can I bring Edward along?" Jane asked, hugging the plush toy tighter. Right now, Edward was one of the few tangible objects she had that reminded her of Katherine. She knew why she was going for therapy, and tried her best to keep it together. That way, she wouldn't worry her friends as much as they were on Monday. She was already a failure, she didn't want to burden her friends even more.

"Yeah, Edward can tag along." Catherine relented, the plush toy was harmless enough. Unless Jane coated it with contact poison or had hidden something sharp in him, objects that the patients wanted for comfort were allowed. Jane sat up, her blonde hair in a mess and her eyes sunken. She was wearing a plain black t-shirt and a pair of tights, the same outfit she had worn since Friday. Her roommates tried their best to get Jane to bathe more frequently, but the latter always claimed that she didn't have enough energy to do so. "Your brother's bringing you there. I'm also tagging along so don't worry."

"... You guys don't have to."

"We need to."

"... Don't you trust me?"

"... Let's go." Catherine evaded the question, but her answer was as clear as day. For the time being, they couldn't leave Jane alone. They were so concerned that they insisted on helping Jane to shower, as infantalising as that sounded. They were all trying their best to cope with it, especially Catalina. Seeing her closest friend fall into a state that reminded her of her girlfriend years ago crushed her, and despite her knowledge as a Psychology major, she couldn't be assured that Jane would be fine.

Jane followed Catherine out of her house, the latter locking the door behind her before gesturing her to a silver car. John was the driver, and they said nothing on their way to the therapist. He had so many questions, ranging from innocent ones such as how was Jane coping with her studies to serious ones such as whether Jane was alright. He knew asking whether Jane was alright was a stupid question, anyone could see that she wasn't.

There were a lot of things that concerned him, mainly the breakdown Jane had at the hospital. From a brief conversation he had with Catalina, he found out that Jane wasn't as happy as he remembered, that she had been pretending to be happy just to reassure others. They eventually reached their destination, and he dropped off the two women while he went to the car park before finding them.

John wanted to scream, how long had Jane been suffering on her own? He had contacted the rest of his siblings after collecting the statements, and he found out that apart from Henry, Thomas and Dorothy, she didn't keep in touch with the rest. He was surprised to learn from Dorothy that Jane calling her was a recent development, and that she most probably wouldn't have contacted her had it not been for Katherine. He had also learnt that Jane wasn't as invincible as they had assumed, that she actually suffered food poisoning after drinking a bad batch of coffee made by Dorothy.

He eventually made his way to the holding area where Catherine was, noting how she occasionally glanced in the direction of a door. John realised that was where Jane was, and approached the woman, her shoulders tensed up as he approached.

"Ms Parr was it? Thank you for being there for my sister." Catherine bit her lip as she crossed her arms, an indication that she was either being defensive or protecting herself so that she felt less vulnerable around the man. "... I understand that you've dated Tommy."

"He spoke about me?"

"Yeah, and from what he told us… you're better off without him. I'm not kidding about that." John sighed, the things he had heard from his younger brother were… less than savoury to say the least. He constantly wondered what was so attractive about him that drew women to him, he had a hidden stash of child pornography that John accidentally found during his second year at university to boot. Catherine nodded in kind, she had discovered his search history, all of which contained searches for nude children. Specifically, girls with red hair and blue eyes.

"Mmhm. He… you should probably throw him in prison."

"Sometimes I wish I did." There was a lull in the conversation, and John wasn't sure if she should bring up his sister. He wasn't sure if Catherine was willing to talk about Jane, and he wouldn't blame any of her friends if they weren't willing to talk at all. "... Tea or coffee?"

"Coffee, you?"

"I don't really have a preference since I drink both but... Jane… Jane always made it the best tea, better than Mother."

"... It must be hard for you to see Seymour like that."

"It is, but… I think she has it the hardest. That woman… her name… Catalina? Yes, Ms Catalina. She told me… told me that Jane wasn't in the best mental state for a while now. That Jane had her fair share of troubles even back in Salisbury, that nobody knew of until recently."

"... How religious is your family?"

"Very, save for a few. I'm… I actually wanted to tell Henry this but… I'm sorry, but can you do me a favour and hear me out?" John asked, messing up his hair as he glanced at the woman, who shrugged in response. There was something about strangers that made it easier for him to spill his secrets to, maybe it was the so-called anonymity behind it all, that ultimately they were just two ships passing in the night. "I'm gay. I'm… I'm actually going to marry Robert in June. I just… I just don't know if I should even tell the ones that aren't as religious as the rest."

"Does Robert know that you haven't come out to your family?"

"Yeah, and he understands… though he would prefer if I told at least one of them." John chuckled, it was the typical situation when one of them hadn't come out while the other was open to everyone, and that there was pressure for the first one to come out somehow. So he told Catherine exactly what he thought, and managed to bring a smile onto her face. "It's pretty funny if you think about it."

"Maybe, though this is a real thing in society. People are afraid to accept who they are because they just so happened to be the monsters told by the majority." Catherine sighed, she knew that she shouldn't be revealing Jane's sexuality to him, regardless of his own. However, she knew that her friend needed support in the form of her family, and only John proved to be capable so far. "... I'm sure Seymour would understand."

"Will she? She has been pretty devout… she's always visiting the church."

"She hasn't visited the damn church since she came to London." That surprised John, Jane always seemed to be at ease at church. Or at least, that was what he remembered. Their family also said the same observations to him whenever they chatted, but that made John wonder if it was all just a facade Jane had put up. "... Okay look, I'm going to be saying something that completely breaks her trust in me and my worth as a decent human being, but she expresses romantic interest in women. Or at least Howard. So if that arsehole didn't slash Howard's neck, Seymour _might_ have come out to us. God damn it, I can't believe I just said that."

"... Did she explicitly say that?"

"She _did_ call herself a repressed lesbian over chat, but it was obvious that it wasn't her coming out. She said that because she was panicking last Sunday over her date with Howard."

"... Ah." That was all John could say, he really wasn't expecting to hear such news. He could tell that Catherine was already regretting her decision to spill the beans, and was heartened that Jane had found friends that truly cared for her. Catherine was swearing at herself for letting it slip to John about Jane's sexuality, she couldn't believe she prided herself as a trustworthy ally when she couldn't keep her damn mouth shut. "Ms Howard… she's a nice girl."

"Aragón mentioned that you've met them before."

"I… yes. On official business."

"That would explain why you gave Boleyn a deadpan look when we were at the station."

"Can you blame me though? Ms Boleyn gives off the impression that she would set a store on fire."

"Heh, fair enough." Catherine thought about Katherine, about how even though she was battling her own issues she still made it a priority to be there for others. She thought about how Katherine always smiled around them, and did her best to do so when it was painfully obvious that she wasn't as cheery as people assumed her to be. Catherine started to shed tears the more she thought about Katherine, she regretted saying that they weren't considered close friends to her on Valentine's Day, even though it was said in jest. "... Sorry, I just… had something in my eye."

"... It's alright, I understand."

* * *

Katherine frowned at the portable whiteboard placed in front of her. She had woken up to a room that wasn't hers, and her cousin was crying on her legs when she woke up. Shortly after, she was told not to speak for a while as a precaution. The doctor assured her that her vocal cords weren't damaged at all, just that they needed to ensure that the wound wasn't severe. They informed her that until they felt it was appropriate, she would be on intravenous drips and that she should use the whiteboard to communicate. She brought her hand to her neck, making out a scar on it. She shuddered, all she remembered was the pain, the warm feeling in her hands, the darkness, and the voice begging her to stay.

"hey cuz are you ok?" Katherine wrote on the whiteboard before prodding her cousin's shoulder with it, startling her. Anne didn't realise that Katherine had been conscious for at least five minutes, and didn't notice the doctor entering to inform Katherine about her condition. She cried again, relieved that her cousin was finally awake. Katherine quickly erased the board and wrote again, a different question on it. "what happened?"

"Thomas happened. He… do you remember or…?" Anne asked, she didn't want to explain to Katherine what the investigation revealed if she did. Anne didn't want to bring up that night if she could, she knew that it was traumatising and the last thing she wanted was to make her cousin relieve the ordeal all over again. Katherine nodded, she remembered up to the part when her throat was slit. So she wrote that down, and Anne nodded in response. "Okay well… Janey left her phone at our place, so she went back and found out that the door opened when she knocked. Then she went in because she heard sounds from your room, and then hit him with what investigation discovered to be a thermos."

"oh you mean the flask cathy gave me for xmas?"

"I… guess? I mean if you left it in your room then yeah, that should be it." Anne read the next question, flinching once Katherine was done. The question asked what happened afterwards, and if Jane was alright. Anne wasn't sure how to explain to her cousin that Jane was physically fine, but mentally scarred. "... She… She's fine. Managed to knock Thomas out."

"where is she?"

"... Getting mental help." Anne wanted to explain that Jane went to her appointment yesterday, but decided that it was a small detail. Katherine had a broad smile on her face as she wrote down what she wanted to say, ending it with a flourish to emphasise her delight.

"shes finally seeking help for her depression?" Anne averted her eyes away from Katherine as she reached out for her hand, squeezing it gently. Katherine panicked, what did that mean? That wasn't a good sign was it? _'No. No no no no, you said that she's fine! You said so!'_

"Janey… tried to stop you from bleeding out… and held you while begging you to stay with her." Anne managed to force out, her lips quivering as she resisted the urge to look at her cousin. "She's at a mental bitch's place. She's there because we suspect her to be suffering from PTSD and extreme guilt that could lead to depression, or something else Cat said."

"...!" Katherine reached out for her board and wrote more questions for her cousin, with only one thought in mind. That it was all her fault, it was all her fault for everything, and now Jane was paying the price. She felt fine, she had dealt with three others before, so she knew she could handle Thomas. She _had_ to. "is she ok? what happened to her? please tell me!"

"I don't know, none of us do. She drank a hell lot of slushies after she heard that you're alive, and she… she wasn't crying by then though I think it's because she didn't have any more tears. She…" Anne stopped, should she really tell her cousin? Did she have the right to tell Katherine that the reason Jane reacted the way she did was because she _loved_ her? Katherine erased her words and wrote new ones, the board depicting "she what?". "... Look, it's not my place to say. You gotta understand, it really isn't."

"ok i get it" Katherine sadly wrote, adding a frowning face at the end to indicate her emotions. She wouldn't push Anne if she didn't feel that it was her place to tell her, it was the least she could do given that Jane had suffered so much because of her. Katherine gripped the board, all she wanted was to scream and curse her male cousin for ruining everything. She loosened her grip on the board, realising that what was done was already done. She knew that it was ultimately her to blame for everything, and that she should accept responsibility.

"Kitty, I don't know what you're thinking right now but I want to tell you that it's not your fault Thomas broke in. It's not your fault that he tried to rape you. It's not your fault that you nearly died. Nothing, and I mean _nothing_ , was your fault. And it certainly isn't your fault that Janey's now at a mental bitch's place." Anne started, she had a feeling that Katherine was starting to spiral into self-blaming. The therapist Katherine went to had hinted to her that the younger woman tended to blame herself as a way to cope, and that it was a normal behaviour for victims of sexual abuse. Of course, that way of thinking had to be changed, but the therapist felt that it was best to do so over the long run. Or at least, that was what Anne managed to beg out of her.

"it feels like it's mine though, i caused the woman i actually love to cry over a broken mess like me"

"Okay. Okay, I'm gonna… I'm gonna do that thing your mental bitch said to me once." Anne racked her brain, trying her best to remember what was the advice she was given. Eventually, she remembered, but wasn't entirely sure if it was for depression or for guilt. She would ask Catalina about it later. "Okay so… I understand that you view yourself in a negative light… and I understand that it hurts to see the one you love in pain but… I want you to consider that what you're saying hurts _me_ , because I care for you and… and it hurts me to see the person I care about hurting."

"i'm sorry" Was all Katherine wrote in response. Anne nodded, interpreting that Katherine was at least thinking about it. She wondered if it would help her cousin, she didn't think it would help her if she was in Katherine's shoes.

She recalled how she lashed out at Catalina initially, resorting to using sex as a way to cope with her near-death experience. She scoffed, now that she had time to reflect upon her past, her past self was considered destructive both to herself and to the others surrounding her. She remembered being flippant towards both Katherine's and Anna's concerns when she started to sleep around with others, and remembered Catalina asking her if sleeping with numerous people really helped her to forget what Henry did to her. Anne wondered what would happen if she didn't accept that engaging in risky sexual behaviour wasn't a good coping mechanism, would she end up forgotten in an alley until someone took notice because she was already decomposing? She could feel her sleeve being tugged, indicating that Katherine wanted her attention.

"will a choker cover my scar?"

"I think so, we can go shop for one at a pet store."

"booooo you're just salty that Lin-lin gave you a dog's collar"

"I'm not! Anyways… I contacted the school about your situation and asked for their advice. They say that it depends on your situation, but even in the worst case scenario, they're willing to promote you to the next year. Just that you gotta take extra classes to make up for the ones you missed this year." Katherine nodded, erasing the board and scribbling another question on it. Anne frowned as she saw the question, she had hoped she wouldn't have to deal with it. "... I'll probably tell my dad about you. Hopefully he doesn't tell the rest."

"can you tell the rest to act like nothing's wrong? i don't want to bring down the mood"

"Even so, there's Janey…"

"pls? fake it until you make it rmb? if i'm constantly surrounded by happy things, i might really be happy for real"

"... Alright, you should say that in the group too. Your phone's on the bedside table by the way."

* * *

**[henry viii's ex-wives]**

_**[4.57 PM]** _

**katsitter:** heyaaaaa!!!!!

 **katsitter:** im awake :)

 **Regrets &Coffee: **Oh thank god!

 **Regrets &Coffee: **Listen, I'm so sorry that I dismissed you last Sunday and I promise to not do that again.

 **that boleyn girl:** chill bitch

 **KweenCleves:** ur acting suspcioly calm even tho ur a mess…

 **that boleyn girl:** thts bc she told me tht she wanted us to try to be happy n shit

 **that boleyn girl:** ive a lot of opinions towards tht btw

 **katsitter:** lol ik thks for not giving docs a reason to yeet u out

 **Regrets &Coffee: **I'll respect what you think is best but…

 **that boleyn girl:** oh dun worry shes still going back to her mental bitch

 **that boleyn girl:** shes def not fine on the inside

 **katsitter:** im still online

 **katsitter:** but yea even i see tht i need to go back

 **katsitter:** its like wht anna said to me

 **katsitter:** its ok to admit tht u need help

 **katsitter:** u dun hv to completely agree to it tho

 **KweenCleves:** i didnt say the last part

 **Mentally Dead:** Kat! You're awake!

 **Mentally Dead:** Are you…?

 **katsitter:** urgh yes im fine

 **katsitter:** i mean im not a wreck

 **katsitter:** even tho cuz says tht i shld

 **katsitter:** but im fine!

 **katsitter:** rlly!

 **KweenCleves:** ok since u want us to act like nothing has happened which is totes weird n def not wht we shld be doing… ok then…?

 **KweenCleves:** so uh cathy n i had a wonderful time stargazing with sch properyu

 **KweenCleves:** gdi this is horrible therapy

 **katsitter:** eh im supposed to go for grp therapy aft cbt so this is fine

 **katsitter:** use cuz as a benchmark

 **katsitter:** if i start screaming my head off once i can speak i give u all permission to lock me up

 **that boleyn girl:** wtf i scream for gd reasons

 **Mentally Dead:** Speaking of her, Bo and I are dating

 **KweenCleves:** we kno

 **katsitter:** yea rmb the video anna sent??

 **Mentally Dead:** I meant that we're still together

 **Regrets &Coffee: **Good to hear?

 **that boleyn girl:** u girls r betting on us so yea pay up etc etc

 **Regrets &Coffee: **The only thing we made a bet on was Seymour's bra size remember?

 **that boleyn girl:** lmaoooo u can admit tht the four of u hv a secret bet in the araleyn grp

 **that boleyn girl:** n yes i hv to jailbreak into kittys phone

 **katsitter:** u wht?????

 **katsitter:** also we did NOT hv a bet on u bitches!!!!

 **Mentally Dead:** … Are you sure this is helping?

 **katsitter:** look i rather think abt my frens being happy then to think abt how i was in a room with my cousin who tried to rape me but ended up nearly killing me

 **katsitter:** so healthy or not i rather do this then talk abt my feelings bc if i do i might want to kill thomas again

 **katsitter:** i mean im ok with shagging cousins???

 **KweenCleves:** didnt ask but ok we respect tht

 **that boleyn girl:** in the impossible scenaoiro tht u hv to shag a cousin

 **that boleyn girl:** pls just do me

 **that boleyn girl:** my bro is dodgy n probs a real rapist n my sis ia a huge bitch

 **that boleyn girl:** tht n shes not into women

 **katsitter:**...gd to know tht ive an ans to tht very impossible scene u just mentioned

 **Regrets &Coffee: **Don't worry Howard, I won't ever write a story about you and her in bed.

 **Mentally Dead:** I think the last thing Kat needs is more sexual stories...

 **katsitter:** main point is tht im just not gonna shag ppl who i think r just frens

 **katsitter:** also this is a gd time to say tht ive been sleeping ard for a while now

 **that boleyn girl:** we need to revisit tht convo

 **that boleyn girl:** did u literally not rmb wht i did

 **Mentally Dead:** I'm honestly impressed that you didn't catch a STD at all back then

 **katsitter:** so yea but lets talk abt happy things while i manipulate u all bc im a fuckup

 **katsitter:** also i agree with linlin

 **that boleyn girl:** how tf would u kno if u dun hv a std

 **Mentally Dead:** Believe it or not, but I do go for checks

 **KweenCleves:** if till now u still dun hv any stds then anne shld be fine

 **Regrets &Coffee: **Boleyn should still play it safe and get herself checked.

 **J.S.:** You're not a 'fuckup' Katherine.

 **KweenCleves:** oh hi jane!

 **J.S.:** I'm the fuck up.

 **Regrets &Coffee: **Before we talk about how unhealthy this is and the things we need to unpack here, someone save Seymour's message.

 **Regrets &Coffee: **This is the first and possibly last time Seymour swears.

 **that boleyn girl:** lol already did

 **that boleyn girl:** how was therapy

 **J.S.:** Horrible, to say the least.

 **J.S.:** It was like a reflection session.

 **J.S.:** We started with the usual icebreakers, then once I mentioned my family, she started asking me questions and discovered that I felt neglected by my family.

 **KweenCleves:** tht doesnt sound like a reflection session

 **katsitter:** more like interrogation

 **katsitter:** btw ur NOT a fuckup

 **J.S.:** Neither are you Katherine.

 **Mentally Dead:** Both of you aren't fuckups, end of story

 **Mentally Dead:** You know what, I think Kat's 'everyone be happy' therapy might work

 **Regrets &Coffee: **Are you serious?!

 **Mentally Dead:** I'm serious but I don't know what I'm doing and I just realised I've learnt NOTHING from my major

 **Mentally Dead:** Anyways it might make Jane blame herself less

 **Mentally Dead:** And before you start Jane, you're going back to therapy every Sunday

 **that boleyn girl:** im all for bad decisions but im starting to regret supporting u kitty

 **J.S.:** I do feel a bit better after the session.

 **J.S.:** I knew it was a great idea to put it on a Sunday.

 **KweenCleves:** waittttt

 **KweenCleves:** is it bc ur issue with god n ur mental state n by putting it on a sunday u feel slightly better abt skipping church?

 **J.S.:** :D

 **KweenCleves:** jfc

 **Regrets &Coffee: **Anyways, your brother said that he wants to speak to you about something which I'm going to apologise beforehand because I did something horribly wrong.

 **that boleyn girl:** u make it sound like u burnt down holbeins

 **Regrets &Coffee: **I would rather burn that place down.

 **katsitter:** so wht did u do??

 **Regrets &Coffee: **I outed Seymour to her brother.

 **Regrets &Coffee: **And I'm really sorry.

 **Regrets &Coffee: **I understand if you hate me for breaking your trust.

 **J.S.:** I appreciate you for telling me, but John has already informed me about it.

 **J.S.:** I… If you told someone else, I think I would feel betrayed.

 **J.S.:** But you mentioned it to someone who needed support, and I find it okay.

 **J.S.:** So thank you for giving him the support he needed, and thank you for helping me to come out to one of my siblings without making me do it.

 **J.S.:** But please don't ever do that again Cathy.

 **that boleyn girl:** yay??

* * *

"You really don't have to take leave just for me John." Jane said as they sat on a bench within campus. John had asked her to meet with him, and he proceeded to inform her about the talk he had with Catherine last week before proceeding to tell her the news she wanted to hear. "... So Anne and I are… just free?"

"Culpeper's going to jail, and yes, both of you are in the clear. I don't think his parents are planning to press charges, which is pretty sensible of them if I may add." John shrugged, observing his sister. She had a calm expression on her face, but he could tell that she was struggling to maintain it. He didn't know if it meant that Jane was stronger than she looked, or was coping in the only way she knew how. "... About what I told you… I'm going to visit them with Robert, and I'm going to tell them that I'm marrying him."

"I think Dorothy would support you, she doesn't seem to be opposed to homosexuality."

"How do you know that?"

"She had mistaken Katherine to be my girlfriend, and I believe she continues to do so."

"I wonder how Henry will take it. Have you contacted him recently?" Jane shook her head, she hadn't contacted any of her brothers as of late. She only contacted Dorothy once in a while, and was fairly sure that Katherine called her more often than she did. "I see. Are you girls free in June?"

"Maybe, it depends. Why?"

"... We haven't sent out the RSVPs yet, and I was thinking… if the rest refuse to attend, maybe you can invite your friends."

"I'll ask." Jane said, staring straight ahead. She wasn't staring at anything in particular, all she did was to stare at what was directly in front of her. John crossed his arms, he wasn't sure if he should inquire about his sister's mental wellbeing. He knew that he should show that he cared, but he also didn't want to remind Jane of what she saw that night.

"... How are you feeling?"

"What do you want me to say, John? I'll always say that I'm fine, but it's becoming increasingly obvious to everyone that I'm not. But I have to be fine John, I'm supposed to be that person that's always there for everyone even though things get in their way. I'm supposed to be the invincible role model every family wants. Yet, I know that things really can't go on this way. I'm already well on my way to getting diabetes, and I'm just tired. I just want to be standing near Big Ben with Katherine without dreaming about how I saw the life fading from her. I just want to be with the church while holding the hand of the woman I love. I just want to stop waking up crying over how I nearly lost her. So tell me John, what do you want me to say?"

"I… I want you to say whatever's on your mind Jane. I want you to be honest with me and not bottle everything up. I don't want you to just pretend that you're okay so that we can be happy. I don't want you to sacrifice everything you have just for us. I don't want you to be someone you're not just because we need that someone. I just want you to be yourself Jane, it doesn't matter if you're a fuck up or not, I just want _you_."

"... Then can I say that it was my fault last Sunday?"

"You can, but always remember that in the end, it's neither yours or Ms Howard's fault."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> 1\. Were Anne and Catalina right to keep what had happened to Katherine a secret from Catherine and Anna? Why or why not?
> 
> 2\. What do you think about John's belief that revealing secrets to strangers is easier than doing so to people he knows? 
> 
> 3\. Was Catherine right to out Jane to John, even if it's to give him to assurance he needs? Why or why not?
> 
> 4\. Is it healthy for Katherine to cope with what she had experienced by faking it until she genuinely becomes happy? Should her friends go along with her or not?
> 
> 5\. Is it better for Jane to be true to herself or to remain as the Jane people know her by? Explain.


	16. Chapter 16

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A reminder that as mentioned in the tags, Anne, Jane, and Katherine are cousins.

"Ms Howard, if you need any assistance, please feel free to email the school about it." Katherine nodded and gave her lecturer a quick bow before heading out of the lecture hall, bumping into Jane in the process. Her smile widened upon seeing the fourth-year, it had been a while since they physically saw each other. Jane mustered a smile, her grey eyes still sunken and Katherine noticed that she had lost some weight.

"Jane! It's been so long, Lin-Lin said that you were busy with school. How is it so far?"

"Barely manageable, but I think I can graduate with a decent score. What about you Katherine?" Jane asked, noticing the collar around Katherine's neck. She frowned, not just because it reminded her of that night but also it was an actual collar for pets and not a choker that resembled a collar. A studded pink capital 'K' was hanging from the collar, gleaming every time it reflected light. _'... It suits her…'_

"It's fine, decided to just finish all my classes this year instead of taking them up next year. Is it true that the workload during the second year is a lot?"

"I would think it depends on your major as well as the modules you're taking." Katherine nodded, reaching out for Jane's hand. Before she touched the latter's hand, she paused for a brief moment. Jane noticed, and took the initiative by grasping the younger woman's hand. "... It's cold."

"And you're very warm." Katherine commented, squeezing the hand tighter. Ever since Valentine's Day, they have not been speaking to each other face to face, with Jane citing the reason as being stuck with deadlines. Both Anne and Anna didn't believe the Education major, and only relented when their girlfriends had confirmed that Jane was indeed doing her best to finish up her work. "So… wanna go get a cup of coffee?"

"Hmm… no, I think I'll settle for water and a stale pastry at Anna's workplace." Katherine chuckled at the comment, from what she had heard from Catherine, Jane had become less cheerful but more genuine with her words. They all found it ironic that all it took for Jane to be more like herself (or at least what her internal thoughts were like) was a breakdown, and they weren't sure if they should be concerned or horrified at that chilling realisation.

They made their way towards the cafe Anna worked at, swapping stories that had occurred during the month they didn't see each other. Jane remarked that her therapist had banned her from drinking slushies as Jane associated the drink with pain, the latter grumbling as she complained about how bitter her prescriptions tasted. Katherine laughed before quipping that her therapist encouraged her to drink slushies if it meant getting the woman to take her prescriptions, something that Jane was openly jealous of.

"Jane! God, you look like shit!" Anna remarked as they entered the cafe, which was empty as usual. Jane managed a chuckle as she ordered a donut for herself, while Katherine ordered 'the least shitty coffee you can make'. "It's been so long! Those deadlines must really be hitting you hard."

"I think Lina has it worse, she was yelling at Edward for no reason." Katherine and Anna stared at each other, having no idea who, or in this case, what Edward was. "Oh right, that's the name I gave to the plush toy Katherine gave me."

"You mean that plague doc Kat bought with Anne's money?"

"It's a plague doctor, yes."

"... And you call it Edward?"

"He looks like an Edward."

"Eh, makes sense." Anna shrugged, she was cool with people giving their toys names. Hell, even _she_ gave her teddy bear a name. She was also pretty sure that Anne named some of her underwear, but never had a chance to bring it up. "Oh yeah so uh… how's the therapy?"

"It's… fine. My main issue is that I'm banned from slushies. I can't go back to tea not when I'm used to its sweetness." Jane sighed, she considered asking Catherine to help her write a letter to persuade her therapist that she should be allowed to drink slushies. After all, surely an addict could understand another addict. "Other than the nightmares, cold sweat, and screaming, I feel better. Probably. I try not to think about how I feel else I start doubting myself again."

"Oh my god, same!"

"Kat, that's not supposed to be something you should agree with."

"Yeah you're right, I think I can stop myself from screaming when I wake up." Anna sighed, her two friends were doing better than she had expected. Or maybe they weren't, but they at least had the strength to pretend that everything was fine on the surface. She served the orders, with Katherine taking a sip of her coffee before grimacing. "I said the least shitty coffee you can make, not something Cathy would like!"

"That _is_ the least shitty I can make without burning this place down! Have you forgotten that I'm bad at this?!"

"How the hell are you still working here?!"

"I don't know, okay?! No one comes here save for Cathy and you girls!" Anna and Katherine started arguing over the coffee's quality, with Jane watching while munching on her stale donut. She could never understand how the cafe was still operating and not in the red or burnt down by Anna. The argument ended when the door swung open, revealing Catherine. Katherine stared at her friend with a pastry forcefully stuffed into her mouth by her roommate, while Anna had the brightest smile anyone had ever seen as Catherine ordered a cup of coffee. "Coming right up!"

"Hey Cathy, how's your story coming along?" Jane asked, aware that one of the projects Catherine had to do was a short story about any topic. Catherine groaned as she took a seat near the counter as she waited for Anna to serve her order. "If anything, you can always write a story about Lina and Anne."

"Hell no. I did _not_ need to see Boleyn riding Aragón." Catherine shuddered, she chose the wrong moment to enter Catalina's room to ask her what she wanted for dinner. She quickly realised that Anne was her dinner, as well as a few candles and a whip. Needless to say, all three of them were screaming while Jane hugged Edward as she laid in bed. "It was so _so_ horrible."

"I thought my cousin likes to stick to vanilla?"

" _That's_ vanilla?!" Katherine nodded, she was already used to Anne's and Catalina's bedroom activities. They weren't subtle about it whenever they did at Anne's place, and even though that happened rarely, Katherine could tell from their conversations that what they did was a routine to them. "What does that make my smut stories about them then, sugar?!"

"No idea, anyways Cathy, I got this great idea for my next tattoo!" Katherine announced, pointing to her right arm while explaining that she would go for the typical floral theme. Catherine hummed in agreement, mentioning that she was also considering getting another tattoo. She then mentioned that Anna once expressed interest in getting a tattoo, which perked Katherine up. "Really Anna?! You should do it!"

"Ha! Lemme think of a nice one that I won't regret first." Anna replied, waving Catherine's cup of coffee. Catherine expressed her gratitude before pressing her lips against Anna's left cheek, making the latter blush. "C-Cathy! C'mon, not in front of Kat! Anne's gonna kill me."

"No she won't."

"Yeah! I've been through sexual abuse anyways, what's a bit of kissing?"

"That's very morbid Howard, and a sign that we should all resume being overly concerned."

* * *

**[henry viii's ex-wives]**

_**[3.48 PM]** _

**that boleyn girl:** suppppp bitches

 **Mentally Dead:** Oh hello regret

 **that boleyn girl:** wait wht

 **Mentally Dead:** Kidding, I don't regret dating you

 **katsitter:** yayyyy

 **katsitter:** wtf did u do now cuz

 **Regrets &Coffee: **Even Howard doesn't trust you Boleyn.

 **that boleyn girl:** i did nothing

 **that boleyn girl:** im not in jail

 **that boleyn girl:** cat hasnt broke up with me

 **that boleyn girl:** n im not in jail

 **J.S.:** Should I be concerned that you've been to the police station more times than us combined?

 **that boleyn girl:** nah

 **that boleyn girl:** anyways april fools is coming uppppp

 **KweenCleves:** ok so?

 **Mentally Dead:** How would you all like to participate in our first bonding activity?

 **Regrets &Coffee: **When Boleyn says it, it's dodgy as hell.

 **Regrets &Coffee: **When YOU say it, it sounds legit.

 **katsitter:** no its not legit

 **katsitter:** stop pranking henry

 **katsitter:** how is it tht u two dun hv restangusing orders??

 **J.S.:** I'm concerned now.

 **katsitter:** theyre either gonna a set fire to henrys hse b tp his hse c splash his hse with paint

 **KweenCleves:** whys everything abt his hse

 **Regrets &Coffee: **Or D: We ruin his social life on our gossip mill.

 **J.S.:** Can't you two leave him alone?

 **J.S.:** I mean yes, I want him to suffer from broken bones and permanent scarring and to be in pain for the rest of his life but making his life a living hell on April Fool's is wrong.

 **that boleyn girl:** i like this janey

 **katsitter:** me too :D

 **KweenCleves:** O_O

 **KweenCleves:** ok look i dun care wtf u do just dun land urself in jail

 **Mentally Dead:** How about we make him drink a batch of the coffee from your cafe?

 **KweenCleves:** tht sounds ok

 **that boleyn girl:** WHILE WE LEAVE HIM IN A BURNING HSE

 **KweenCleves:** NO

 **J.S.:** A simulation of a burning house?

 **KweenCleves:** if i sneak u a slushie will u stop enabling them??

 **J.S.:** I appreciate the offer, but I really can't…

 **Regrets &Coffee: **By the way I've just queued something up about him that will go online in three hours.

 **Regrets &Coffee: **Boleyn, if I give you an envelope how fast can you sneak it in with his stuff?

 **that boleyn girl:** very wht is it

 **Regrets &Coffee: **Just some materials I kept from my ex-boyfriend.

 **katsitter:** wait which one

 **that boleyn girl:** dun care ok lets do this

 **Regrets &Coffee: **Meet you at Anna's cafe.

 **that boleyn girl:** yea bby

 **katsitter:** ew pls dun call anyone bby again

 **KweenCleves:** oh fuck no i dun wanna a repeat of the bby incident

 **Regrets &Coffee:** What's that?

 **katsitter:** anne went thru a bieber phase n guess wht song she kept repeating

 **Regrets &Coffee: **It's one thing if she likes it ironically...?

 **Mentally Dead:** Think about what you know about Bo and ask yourself if that's true

 **J.S.:** Have some faith in Anne.

 **J.S.:** Besides, it can't be worse than Cathy's hula-hoop incident...

 **Mentally Dead:** Moving on from both of the dreadful incidents

 **Mentally Dead:** Kat, how would you like to splash animal blood on his house?

 **J.S.:** Leave her alone Lina.

**[SAP]**

_**[4.01 PM]** _

**Mentally Dead:** By the way, what IS inside that envelope you speak of?

 **Regrets &Coffee: **Trust me, you don't want to know.

 **J.S.:** I think she's planning to blackmail Henry.

 **Regrets &Coffee: **More like planting false evidence…

 **Mentally Dead:** Of what?

 **Regrets &Coffee: **Uh…

 **Regrets &Coffee:** Something fun?

 **Regrets &Coffee: **But also wildly inappropriate.

 **Mentally Dead:** Just spill

 **Regrets &Coffee: **Child pornography.

 **J.S.:** That is indeed bad, but I was honestly expecting much worse.

 **Mentally Dead:** Why do you even have child porn with you?!

 **Regrets &Coffee: **Okay, it all started when I was ransacking my ex's room to see if there's any material I could write about students taking a few years off from school.

 **J.S.:** Wait, you mean they belong to Tommy?!

 **Regrets &Coffee: **Yep.

 **Mentally Dead:** Jesus, that's fucked up

 **Regrets &Coffee: **Oh by the way Seymour, your brother knows about it too.

 **J.S.:** John?

 **Regrets &Coffee: **Yep.

 **J.S.:** … I think I need to hug Edward…

 **Regrets &Coffee: **There's also something else that I should admit to you Seymour.

 **J.S.:** What is it?

 **Regrets &Coffee: **I tried to kiss Leafy before.

 **Mentally Dead:** … Girl

 **Mentally Dead:** You dumb up there?

 **Mentally Dead:** You tried to kiss a fucking CACTUS?!

 **Regrets &Coffee: **WELL SORRY I WANTED TO PRACTICE KISSING WITH EDWARD BUT SEYMOUR NEEDED HIM.

 **J.S.:** Why do you even need to practice kissing?

 **Regrets &Coffee: **Because on the Valentine's Day date with Anna we didn't kiss each other on the lips.

 **J.S.:** Okay but why do you have to practice with Edward?

 **Regrets &Coffee: **He's the next best humanoid thing in our house.

 **Mentally Dead:** You've dated before, shouldn't you know how to kiss someone?

 **Regrets &Coffee: **I was never the one initiating the kisses.

 **Mentally Dead:** And you didn't think to consult me?

 **Regrets &Coffee: **I don't want to kiss you, it will feel like I'm kissing Boleyn too.

 **Mentally Dead:** YOU

 **Mentally Dead:** OH MY GOD I MEANT ADVICE DAMN IT

 **Mentally Dead:** YOU DON'T NEED TO ACTUALLY KISS SOMEONE IN ORDER TO KNOW HOW

 **Regrets &Coffee: **I did consider asking Seymour, but then I realised that she probably wanted to save her lips for Howard.

 **Mentally Dead:** AGAIN YOU DON'T HAVE TO ACTUALLY KISS PEOPLE

 **Mentally Dead:** AND WHY WOULD YOU ASK THE VIRGIN AND NOT THE EXPERT?!

 **J.S.:** Oh that explains why you needed Edward!

 **Mentally Dead:** JANE NO

 **Mentally Dead:** PLEASE DON'T TELL ME YOU USE THAT DOCTOR TO PRACTICE KISSING

 **J.S.:** Isn't it just pressing your lips against theirs?

 **Regrets &Coffee: **That was what I thought until I read other writers' works.

 **Regrets &Coffee: **Even purple prose is better than my depiction of kissing!

 **Regrets &Coffee: **And you know how much I HATE purple prose!

 **Mentally Dead:** God you two are impossibly dumb and useless

* * *

"Janey, I need your advice." Anne had invited Jane over to her apartment to seek her advice, for what Jane didn't know. Anne promptly held up a belt-like item in one hand, which Jane immediately realised to be her collar. "Which one should I wear to your brother's wedding?"

"... You invited me over just to ask me that?"

"Do you want me to ask you about your mental health again?"

"Your usual one's fine." Jane immediately pointed to Anne's choker, she didn't think John would be particular about what his guests wore as long as it was decent. Anne nodded, tossing the collar onto the sofa. "How's Katherine? Does she still wake up at night because of-"

"Yes, she's fine and yes, she still does. And no, I haven't told her that you admitted that you're in love with her over a bucket of slushies." Anne crossed her arms, glaring at Jane. She would prefer it if Jane just confessed to Katherine, who was clearly in love with her despite what had happened. She sighed, she knew that wouldn't happen any time soon, and what both women needed was to focus on themselves rather than entering a relationship. "What about you?"

"Me? What about me?"

"You know damn well what I'm referring to." Jane sighed, as much as she appreciated people caring for her, she wasn't used to them fussing over her and treating her like some glass statue. They tried not to treat both Jane and Katherine as such, but it was still hard.

"Yes, I still wake up in the middle of the night crying. Yes, I still think about that night. Yes, I still blame myself for not doing more. And yes, I'm actually staying away from slushed ice."

"I'm honestly surprised you didn't just go behind our backs and get some slushies."

"I find myself tempted to do so at times, but you girls have a point in saying that I'm setting myself up for diabetes."

"Mmhm, anyways I was thinking of wearing this shiny green dress I bought online like last year to the wedding." Anne casually remarked, the doorbell ringing seconds later. She groaned, she wasn't expecting any guests and had half the mind to start a fight if her sister was the one at the door. Upon opening the door, she was greeted by an unfamiliar woman. "Uh… can I help you?"

"Anne, it's me." Anne blinked, she didn't recognise the woman and was about to slam the door on her when the woman sighed with exasperation. "Your sister-in-law? You know, the woman George married?"

"Ohhhhh yeah no."

"Okay _fine_ , I'm your former sister-in-law since I just finalised the divorce with George but still." This surprised Anne, she didn't hear anything from her father about her brother's divorce. The woman glanced at Jane, who gave her a friendly wave in response. "Urgh, alright. I'm Jane Parker, the woman who married your brother a few years ago?"

"Ohhhhhh yeah _still_ no."

"Just let her in already, clearly she knows you." Jane groaned, making her way towards the door and shoving Anne aside so that the woman could enter. She thanked Jane, while Anne muttered that it wasn't Jane's house. "Anne, how is it that you don't know what your sister-in-law looks like?"

"Uh, because George doesn't mention her at all?!"

"Surely you must have attended their wedding?"

"Actually, all we did was to sign some official papers." The woman remarked, with Anne giving Jane a look that said 'see not my fault'. Jane rolled her eyes, slamming the door shut before locking it. "Where's Kitty?"

"Outside, buying stuff with our roommate. Anyways, why are you here?" Anne asked, narrowing her eyes at the woman. She still didn't believe the woman's claim that she had married George. Yes, Anne knew that George married a Jane, but how could she believe the woman at face value when they had never met?

"Helping to plan a friend's wedding, and also because my planning business is located in London."

"Uh huh, since you know Kitty, what's her real name?"

"What is this, '20 Questions'?" Jane smacked Anne's arm, shooting her a glare. Anne shrugged, she was just doing her best to ensure their safety. The woman let out a heavy sigh, her blue eyes hiding her exasperation. "Katherine Howard."

"And how does she look like?"

"Pretty tall, slim figure, long legs, green eyes- oh! She loves pink, and likes to wear this _really_ soft hoodie you gave to her as a birthday present."

"Pfffft, anyone could've guessed that!"

"Anne, you do realise that not many people know that Katherine's eyes aren't actually pink right?"

"She could've searched her name online! Back to you _Ms Parker_ , what's she studying now?"

"Uh… probably something to do with drama? She expressed interest in performing for children during secondary school."

"She did?!"

"Anne, clearly Ms Parker here knows about Katherine more than you do. Can we finally acknowledge her as your former sister-in-law?" Jane had enough of Anne interrogating the woman, and eventually Anne relented. She was still wary around the woman, and made no pains to hide her suspicions. "Since an introduction is in order, I'm Jane Seymour."

"Seymour? I actually know a Seymour, in fact I'm planning his wedding with his fiancé." The woman commented, noting that the two women glanced at each other curiously. "Um…"

"Is it Johnson Seymour by any chance?" Jane asked, to which the woman nodded. "I'm actually his sister, and Anne here… is a friend of his?"

"If your definition of friendship is seeing him every single fucking time you're involved in a crime, then yeah we're mates." The door clicked open, with Anna and Katherine entering. Katherine beamed upon seeing the woman, while Anna blinked at the woman's presence. "Kitty, tell me, do you know this stalker?"

"Stalker?! That's George's wife! Why- how- oh my god! What did you do to her?!" Katherine asked, rushing to hug the woman protectively. Anne scowled, while Jane had a smirk on her face that was soon erased when Anne raised a hand at her. "Don't you touch Jane!"

"Which one? Apparently they're _both_ Jane."

"Both!" Katherine crossed her arms, sticking her tongue out at her cousin, who mirrored the action. She then turned to her former cousin-in-law, worry laced in her words. "Are you okay? Anne didn't bash your head in or anything right?"

"Oi."

"No, I'm fine. I decided to drop by since I'm also staying in London now that I divorced that cheating bastard."

"Okay so uh… I gotta ask, what the hell did you see in that guy 'cause like… both Anne and Kat have nothing good to say 'bout him?" Anna interrupted, awkwardly making her way to the living room where the rest was. The woman mulled the question over, eventually shaking her head with regret.

"I have no idea, I think it was because he knocked me up back then. But I had a miscarriage so there goes the kid, and he was never faithful to begin with so… there you have it."

"The real question should be what did my fucking brother do that finally sealed the deal."

"Oh that? Apart from the fact that I caught him at an all-males orgy that had a fuckton of drugs, I found out that he had made unwanted advances towards Kitty previously. I thought he's just a cheater, I didn't know he also took advantage of underaged relatives _and_ a drug addict!" The woman explained, glancing at the collar Katherine wore. "That's a nice choker."

"Thanks! Anne brought me to this non-judgemental pet store and bought me a customised collar! It's also comfy and doesn't irritate my scar!" Katherine cheerfully replied, horrifying the woman. Jane was also horrified, less about the incident and more about how Anne knew of a pet store that was open to selling pet collars to humans. "Thanks Anne!"

"Yeah, and you now owe me 130 pounds since you haven't paid me for the alarms."

"You mean they weren't an early birthday present?"

"What am I, the bank? You know that I'm still getting money from my father!" The cousins soon started to argue amongst themselves, with Anna trying her best to mediate the situation but failing as they both started screaming to assert dominance over each other. Jane pinched the bridge of her nose, apologising to the woman for her friends' behaviours. The woman apologised back, and expressed understanding towards Jane's plight. "AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!"

"AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!"

"AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!"

"... Ich werde nicht dafür bezhalt, mit dieser Scheiße fertig zu werden…"

* * *

**[SAP]**

_**[3.50 PM]** _

**Regrets &Coffee: **Aragón, Anna just texted me to say that your girlfriend's being a pterodactyl.

 **Mentally Dead:** You could've just sent me a private text

 **Regrets &Coffee: **I also want to check in on Seymour, she's still there hearing them scream.

 **Mentally Dead:** Oh dear lord

 **J.S.:** I'm fine!

 **J.S.:** Hearing them scream beats being alone with my thoughts!

 **J.S.:** Anyways George Boleyn's ex-wife came to visit us!

 **J.S.:** And is the one planning my brother's wedding.

 **Regrets &Coffee: **Are they still screaming?

 **J.S.:** Yup.

 **Mentally Dead:** You can just leave you know…

 **J.S.:** I feel bad leaving Anna alone though.

 **Regrets &Coffee: **Aragón, we should swing by their place after we drop these bags at ours.

 **Mentally Dead:** Good idea

 **Mentally Dead:** Jane, try to distract them

 **J.S.:** With what?

 **Regrets &Coffee: **Anything!

 **Regrets &Coffee: **Do you seriously want to hear them scream until your ears bleed?!

 **J.S.:** At this point, I'm tempted to join in myself.

 **Regrets &Coffee: **I'll text Anna instead.

**[KweenCleves]**

_**[4.00 PM]** _

**Regrets &Coffee: **Hey Liebling, do you think you can distract the three of them before they do something illegal?

 **KweenCleves:** why not ask jane

 **KweenCleves:** oh wiat nvr mind shes cheering kat on now

 **KweenCleves:** damn those two cousins sure hv some lung power

 **Regrets &Coffee: **Liebling, focus.

 **KweenCleves:** yea sure i think i can distract them with a card game

 **Regrets &Coffee: **Brilliant! Aragón and I will be dropping by, most likely to intervene or to drag Boleyn somewhere.

 **KweenCleves:** lol leave it to me

"Okay you little shits, we're all gonna stop screaming!" Anna yelled, her screams drowned out by her roommates. Jane managed to catch pieces of Anna's yelling, and promptly kicked Anne to get her to stop screaming. That left Katherine screaming, who eventually stopped under the impression that she had won. The woman had long left, citing that she needed to visit Robert to discuss the wedding preparations. "Finally! Thanks Jane!"

"She fucking kicked me!"

"Only because Anna wanted to tell us something and I think I'm seriously going deaf." Jane replied, much to Anne's annoyance. Katherine giggled, overjoyed to see that Anne and Jane were acting like how friends should. Anna sighed with relief, hoping that a game of cards would be enough to distract the cousins long enough until Catalina and Catherine arrived.

"Huge mood. Back to the main point, we're gonna play cards!" Upon hearing the mention of cards, both cousins perked up. Jane didn't know why they were so excited, and she had the sinking feeling that she was about to find out why. "Okay ladies, grab your card collections! We're gonna play the bestest card game ever!"

"Wait, what are the rules?"

"There aren't any rules to _this_ card game Janey!" Anne shouted as the three of them ran into their bedrooms to collect all the cards they could find, leaving Jane horrified at what she was about to participate in.

_'Lord have mercy on my soul.'_

* * *

"What the…" Catherine and Catalina entered the unit, only to witness four women enthusiastically slamming cards onto the table, unaware of their presence. They had managed to enter the flat unit without the help of one of the four women as Anne had given Catalina a spare key as a sign of trust, and Catalina used it because none of them answered the doorbell. "Girls, the hell?"

"Ha, suck it! Queen of Hearts!" Anne yelled as she slammed a Queen of Hearts card onto a small messy stack of cards, with her opponents jeering in response. Anna promptly slammed a blue +7 Uno card, which confused both Catalina and Catherine greatly. "Are you fucking serious?!"

"Fucking beat my card Bo-loser!"

"Go, Blue Eyes!" Katherine declared as she slammed a 'Blue Eyes White Dragon' card, a triumphant smirk plastered on her face as she flipped her finger at her opponents. "No one has ever survived its Burst Stream of Destruction!"

"Don't be too cocky Katherine." Jane said as she tossed her student identity card onto the stack, causing her opponents to go wild and confusing her two roommates, who had just witnessed the confusing game. "I believe it's my win this round ladies?"

"Okay, what the fucking fuck did we just witness?!" Catherine exclaimed, alerting their presence to the four women. They all smiled broadly, greatly worrying the two women. "Seymour, I expected better from you!"

"Cathy, wait. It really makes sense once you play it." Jane defended herself, unwilling to admit that she had allowed herself to get caught up in the game's chaos. Both Catherine and Catalina raised an eyebrow at Jane, not believing her the slightest. "Okay, how about you watch us play a full round? That way, you'll get it."

"Feeling arrogant now huh? I'll wipe that smug grin off that pretty face of yours!" Catalina frowned, she knew that her girlfriend was extremely competitive over the most trivial things but that didn't mean she approved of that competitive nature. Even though she adored said nature. "Okay, on the count of three, Henry's a what. One, two… three!"

"... The game hasn't even started and I'm already lost." Catalina muttered as the four women yelled out one word descriptions of Henry, which somehow was used to decide the order the women will be playing. Katherine was declared the winner because she described Henry as Satan himself, and was given the privilege of choosing the direction they would play in. She decided on going anti-clockwise, meaning that Jane would have the last turn. "Okay so… I see a normal deck of cards."

"And I see Uno cards…" Catherine added as the four players started shuffling the cards before distributing them out, and before they knew it, Katherine threw out a Pokemon card. "What the-"

"Go, Charizard!"

"Nuh uh, not when I have this baby!" Anna exclaimed as she threw out a green reverse Uno card, switching the direction clockwise. Katherine threw out a Five of Spades, and Jane proceeded to throw out a Dark Magician card. Anne scoffed as she threw out a card, a smirk on her lips as Catalina smacked her forehead upon realising what she had just played. "Seriously?! You threw out your credit card?!"

"Oh I'm sorry, is it too _powerful_ for you?"

"Ha! You wish!" Anna slammed her own credit card onto the small stack, stunning Anne with her display. "Shouldn't have played your card when Kat just drained your account!"

"Stand up, my Vanguard!" Katherine yelled as she slammed a Vanguard card on top of Anna's credit card, with Anne laughing at the card played. Jane softly chuckled as she slammed a card on top of Katherine's, a twinkle in her grey eyes as the rest gasped in horror. "That's impossible…!"

"7-Eleven reward card, checkmate ladies."

"Yeah, but I have this!" Anne slammed a green handmade card on top of the other cards, proudly swearing at Jane. "Take this you fucker!"

"... Is that the birthday card Henry gave to you?" Catalina grimaced, to think Anne had kept something Henry had given her. Anne scoffed, she needed all the cards she could get in order to give herself an advantage. The rest started to accuse Anne of playing dirty, the reason lost on Catherine and Catalina.

"Sorry not sorry lol." Anna growled, slamming her phone onto the stack. The sight of it confused the non-players immensely, how did a card game end up with the players slamming random objects onto the table? The other three gasped, shocked that Anna had apparently made a daring move.

"Oh yeah?! How about _this_?!" Katherine unbuckled her collar and threw it to the table, slamming the table in the process. Anne accused her cousin of cheating, while Anna countered by reminding everyone that Anne was the biggest cheater of them all. Jane flinched, the sight of Katherine's collar briefly bringing her back to reality. She shook her head, she was in it to win the game, and to have a respite from her internal thoughts.

"Really Katherine?! This is how you want to play it?!"

"Yeah! Not even your student ID can save you now!"

"True, but I bet _this_ will!" Jane slammed a small card onto the table, which revealed to be a business card from her therapist. The rest lost their minds over Jane's card, reluctantly declaring her the winner of the current round as the two non-players watched, perturbed and genuinely worried for their friends' sanity. Jane turned to her roommates, an innocent smile on her face as the other three players argued over how Anne shouldn't be allowed to use her credit card so early into the game. "What do you think? It's pretty easy isn't it?"

"Uh…" Catherine and Catalina could only gape at the sight, still lost on how the game was played and with only one thought on their minds. _'... What the fuck did we just watch?'_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> 1\. What is your opinion towards adults naming their plush toys? 
> 
> 2\. How far is too far when it comes to pranking on April Fool's? Are Anne and Catalina justified in their plans for the day?
> 
> 3\. What does it say about the Boleyns given that Anne doesn't know what Katherine has interest in doing for her future career but Jane Parker, who is unrelated to Katherine, knows?


	17. Chapter 17

Katherine woke up with a start, beads of sweat rolling down from her forehead and to her neck. She was gasping for breath, and pressed a hand to her scar as her chest heaved. She remembered what had caused her to wake up, and hated the nightmare. She hated how because of misogynistic attitudes perpetuated in society, she now had to deal with the memory of Thomas forcing himself on her before slitting her neck. Katherine hated how fear had always crept into her dreams, and hated how because of her, Jane was most definitely experiencing the same kind of night as her. A loud screech was heard in the distance, and she groaned, glancing at the time indicated on her phone. It read '1 April, 2.30 AM'.

"For fuck's sake Anne, stop making gremlin noises and go to sleep! Verdammt!" Katherine could hear Anna swearing at her cousin, which she personally agreed with. She understood that Anne had to write a thesis on Tudor history, and had recently remarked that the musical based on their counterparts shouldn't be used as accurate examples. Anne still continued to scream, irritating both Anna and Katherine. "Anne Boleyn, I swear to god-"

"Tu te tais!"

"You don't get to speak in a second language Anne! You've no right!"

 _'Can they stop shouting…? Aren't we already on our second warning letter?'_ Katherine groaned, three strikes and they would be out on the streets. She wondered if Jane could accommodate three more, she could foresee herself being kicked out of the flat because Anna and Anne couldn't control their volumes. She got off her bed and made her way towards Anne's bedroom, knocking on the door impatiently. "Anne! Can you keep it down?! Anna's trying to sleep here!"

"Go to sleep Kitty!"

"I have nightmares to deal with bitch! I don't give a fuck about why your musical counterpart is shit compared to the real deal, can you keep your screaming to online platforms?! Thanks!" Katherine yelled, she had enough of the nightly screams from her cousin, not even she screamed whenever she woke up in a cold sweat. The house went deathly quiet, which satisfied the youngest woman. She went back to her bedroom and locked it, grumbling as her phone constantly buzzed with messages. _'If I have to deal with my cousin one more time… she's gonna be cleaning the bathroom for the rest of the fucking month...'_

**[henry viii's ex-wives]**

_**[2.36 AM]** _

**Mentally Dead:** Bo, are you ready?

 **Mentally Dead:** I've literally sent you 17 messages to you directly

 **that boleyn girl:** urgh text me ltr?

 **that boleyn girl:** im rushing a history thing

 **that boleyn girl:** also wtf annes dad didnt tell anne to get ahead!!!

 **that boleyn girl:** who tf allowed tht musical to be a thing

 **KweenCleves:** u liked it!!!

 **katsitter:** can confirm

 **that boleyn girl:** oh like u didnt like it too kitty

 **katsitter:** i nvr said i didnt???

 **that boleyn girl:** u literally said omg mood aft ur solo was over

 **KweenCleves:** lmaooooo the kat on stage just gave her this rlly concerned look

 **that boleyn girl:** so did ur acting gf

 **J.S.:** Why are all of you awake?

 **J.S.:** Also, who is this "acting gf"?

 **KweenCleves:** cathy

 **Mentally Dead:** Bo and I are pranking Henry with Anna's help

 **KweenCleves:** n ur sure i dun hv to do anything???

 **Mentally Dead:** Yes

 **J.S.:** Then Katherine?

 **katsitter:** nightmares frm thomas n shit

 **katsitter:** u?

 **J.S.:** Nightmares from seeing you bleed to death in my arms.

 **that boleyn girl:** weuifgakjfvwebvlfdvalfugvilksdbfjhwdsglad

 **Mentally Dead:** Is Bo okay?

 **KweenCleves:** no kat just scolded her for being a pest again

 **katsitter:** u werent helping btw

 **KweenCleves:** btw jane

 **KweenCleves:** can ur hse accomodate six ppl

 **J.S.:** Total of six residents, yes.

 **J.S.:** Six additional residents, no.

 **Mentally Dead:** Wait, we can?!

 **J.S.:** There's a good reason why I leave three bedrooms locked.

 **Mentally Dead:** WE HAVE THREE MORE BEDROOMS?!

 **Mentally Dead:** WHAT THE FUCK ALL THIS TIME YOU COULD ACCOMODATE SIX RESIDENTS?!

 **J.S.:** Um… Lina, are you okay? You're getting really worked up...

 **KweenCleves:** ok cool

 **katsitter:** lets not inconvenience her

 **that boleyn girl:** yea like we only hv two warnings

 **katsitter:** ONE MORE N WE R OUT U BITCH

 **that boleyn girl:** OH R WE YELLING AT EACH OTHER FOR DOMINACE NOW?

 **KweenCleves:** jfc pls no

 **KweenCleves:** how is cathy unaware of us spamming??

 **Mentally Dead:** Jane, can you check if Catherine's sleeping?

 **J.S.:** Hold on.

 **J.S.:** She's awake.

 **Regrets &Coffee: **Girls, I muted this group for a reason.

 **KweenCleves:** for a sec i thot jane legit woke u up just for this

 **J.S.:** She hardly sleeps.

 **that boleyn girl:** back

 **Mentally Dead:** Where were you?

 **that boleyn girl:** asserting my dominance over kitty by dm

 **katsitter:** ISTG I WILL BREAK INTO UR RM N YEET U OUT IF U DUN STFU

 **Regrets &Coffee: **Why are you angry at Boleyn?

 **Regrets &Coffee: **Isn't this typical Boleyn behaviour?

 **KweenCleves:** oh honey

 **KweenCleves:** shes been screaming for at least a week now

 **katsitter:** every single time i wake up in a cold sweat theres always horrible gremlin noises

 **katsitter:** can u at least leave me to wallow in selfguilt in silence????

 **Mentally Dead:** Kat, you have nothing to feel guilty for

 **Mentally Dead:** Bo, should I get you a gag for your birthday?

 **that boleyn girl:** this is not wht i hv in mind when u said u wanted to be kinky next time

 **katsitter:** dun worry linlin i dun wake up in cold sweats all the time

 **katsitter:** just tht every time im awake cuzs screaming her fuckiing head off n its bloody annoying

 **J.S.:** Anyways, don't do anything illegal later.

 **Regrets &Coffee: **Technically I already did?

 **J.S.:** I was referring to Lina and Anne.

 **KweenCleves:** anne stfu n sleep

 **KweenCleves:** u expect me to wake up early on a thursday

 **that boleyn girl:** no u

 **KweenCleves:** no u

 **that boleyn girl:** do i need to establish my dominace here too??

 **katsitter:** jane can u pls adopt me

 **J.S.:** Of course!

 **J.S.:** Wait, as in legally?

 **KweenCleves:** no she means she wants to move out bc annes being a bitch

 **KweenCleves:** while ur at it can u adopt me too

 **Mentally Dead:** Why not ask Catherine to adopt you?

 **KweenCleves:** i wanna date her not be her ward

 **Regrets &Coffee: **Yeah, besides I've adopted Leafy and Edward.

 **Mentally Dead:** Leave them alone Catherine

 **J.S.:** Don't you mean "leaf" them alone?

 **J.S.:** :D

 **Regrets &Coffee: **Okay someone needs to take away Jane's rights.

 **katsitter:** rights to wht??

 **Regrets &Coffee:** I don't know, the right to make puns?

 **J.S.:** Sorry, were they like pun-ches to your gut?

 **Regrets &Coffee:** Fucking hell, it's too early for this shit.

* * *

"What the fuck do you want?" Henry sneered, annoyed that Anna had asked to meet him at the cafe she worked. Anna rolled her eyes, she didn't like it any more than he did, but Catalina and Anne begged her to. Not only that, she had some questions of her own for her ex. "Well?!"

"Chill the fuck out arsehole. I wanna ask you some questions, and you're gonna answer 'em like a good boy or else-" Anna cracked her knuckles, threatening Henry. She hoped that her boxing lessons had paid off, Henry was taller than her, and that was saying a lot considering that she stood at 180 centimetres. Henry growled, but gave her a curt nod to indicate his cooperation. "Gut, gut. Tell me, did you have a part to play with the Culpeper incident?"

"Culpeper?! Why the fuck are you asking _me_ about that damn bastard?!" Henry roared, showing his middle finger at Anna. Anna rolled her eyes, she wasn't scared of him and could probably break a leg or a wrist. "I should be asking _you_ about that damn rumour! How the fuck could you possibly know that I own child porn?!

 _'Wait, he actually owns child porn?! Oh that's- that's so sick. Cathy really did everyone a favour by planting fake evidence.'_ Henry huffed, crossing his arms and glared at Anna. Anna glared back, while police investigation revealed that Thomas acted on his own will, Anna felt that Henry had a role to play, no matter how small. "I didn't know you actually own child porn, and because I'm aware that you're friends with that prick. So, spill."

"I broke things off with him when I realised he was gunning for that slut."

"Don't you call her that!" Anna slammed her fists on the table, her eyes burning with fury as the man before her smirked, having gotten a rise out of the woman. She didn't know what attracted the rest to him, but either way, he was a cruel man who viewed women as little more than playthings. "She nearly died!"

"And how's that my problem? If anything, you should be blaming _her_ for flirting with every single man she meets! A little smile and they're all putty in her hands, an act of kindness and they're reading to sacrifice themselves just for a pathetic cup of coffee."

"Hey bastard! Eat this!" Henry turned to face the source of the noise, and was pelted with newspaper balls. Anne was hurling the balls at her ex, while Catalina supplied her with them. Henry swore at them, unwrapping the balls in a huff. He let out an unholy shriek upon unwrapping the balls, and fled the cafe. "Yeah, run away you coward!"

"What's that white- mein gott! Anne, what the ever loving fuck?!" Anna yelped as she realised what was inside the newspaper, and resisted the urge to hurl upon seeing the rust-coloured blood on the sanitary pads. Anne guffawed, proud at herself for driving away Henry. Catalina's lips quirked upwards, and she started to pick up the newspaper balls. "Is this why you've offered to be on rubbish duty for weeks?!"

"Duh! Some of 'em even have blood jelly!" Anna gagged, the last thing she wanted to hear at eight in the morning was the blood clots shed by one of her friends during their time of the month. Catalina cringed as she picked up a few more newspaper balls, while her girlfriend cackled away like the Disney villain she was. "Oh man, you _won't_ believe who's the secret blood jelly factory!"

"Given that you're taking this well, I'm guessing you're the… whatever you just said." Anna shuddered, she was constantly recalling the sight of the blood clots on the pads, mostly brownish-red with purple hues in them. Anne shook her head, a shit-eating grin as she waved about the exposed pad in front of Anna. "Get that thing away from me!"

"This is your girlfriend's~"

"How did you- never mind. I think I can guess." Anna glanced briefly at Catalina, who had a guilty expression on her face as she snatched the pad away from Anne's hand and wrapped it again with the newspaper. "This is so traumatising, and I'm gonna be sick…"

"Trust me Anna, it was way better than Bo's original idea."

"Which was…?"

"Smearing period blood on Henry." Anna cringed, she had already accepted that her roommate was chaotic and basically a criminal but never did she expect Anne to be so disgusting on so many levels. "By the way, that pad she was waving just now? That's probably Kat's."

"Anne, du bist eine ekelhafte Person und ich hasse dich."

"Aw, thanks for reminding me that I'm a genius at ruining Henry's day."

* * *

**[henry viii's ex-wives]**

_**[8.24 AM]** _

**KweenCleves:** @katsitter @Regrets&Coffee

 **Regrets &Coffee: **Good morning Liebling, please tell me Boleyn's not in jail.

 **katsitter:** hey anna!!!!

 **katsitter:** sorry if im a bit cheery i think im on drugs

 **katsitter:** bc my meds dun usually make me go wheeeeeeee

 **katsitter:** anyways whts up?

 **KweenCleves:** is it tru tht u two hv blood jellies???

 **Regrets &Coffee: **I'm sorry, what?

 **katsitter:** yepppp

 **katsitter:** kinda fun to play with them in the tub

 **katsitter:** theyre just so squishy n fun!!!

 **Regrets &Coffee: **Wait, what are blood jellies?

 **KweenCleves:** u kno

 **KweenCleves:** shark week?

 **Regrets &Coffee: **Oh, blood clots!

 **Regrets &Coffee: **Wait, how do you know I have them?

 **that boleyn girl:** GUESS WHO JUST THREW PADS AT HENRY THE DICKWAD????

 **Regrets &Coffee: **Ah, never mind.

 **katsitter:** ew wtf cuz

 **Mentally Dead:** We wrapped them in newspaper before throwing them at him

 **katsitter:** oh ok then

 **J.S.:** Catherine Parr!

 **Regrets &Coffee: **Oh shit, I swear I didn't attempt to kiss Leafy again.

 **that boleyn girl:** uhhhh dun cheat on anna bc if u do ill come find u n bash ur head in with ur austen merch

 **katsitter:** why r u even trying to kiss a cactus???

 **Mentally Dead:** Finally someone with some brain cells!

 **Mentally Dead:** Even though it's from someone who usually don't have any!

 **katsitter:** excuse u i save my brain cells for impt shit like now

 **J.S.:** There are more important matters than who has brain cells!

 **Regrets &Coffee: **Such as?

 **J.S.:** You didn't flush the toilet!

 **Mentally Dead:** Ew, what?!

 **Regrets &Coffee: **Oh, sorry.

 **J.S.:** It's one thing to not flush, but it's another thing to not flush when you're on your period!

 **KweenCleves:** oh damnnnn

 **that boleyn girl:** how bad can it be lmao

 **J.S.:** [startflushing.jpg]

 **that boleyn girl:** GURLWTFFFFFFFFFF

 **that boleyn girl:** NO

 **that boleyn girl:** NO

 **that boleyn girl:** NO

 **that boleyn girl:** NO

 **KweenCleves:** uh whts tht black thing in the blood??

 **katsitter:** blood jellyyyyyyy

 **katsitter:** omggg cathys r bigger than mines

 **KweenCleves:** oh thts gross honey

 **KweenCleves:** i mean ily still but its also still very gross n i live with anne

 **that boleyn girl:** bitch be thankful that i dun shed bloodoplasm like her

 **Mentally Dead:** Kat, why aren't you scarred for life yet?

 **katsitter:** bc sometimes i like staring at a bloody mess of the toilet bowl n wonder how many babies are in there

 **that boleyn girl:** i need eye bleach

 **that boleyn girl:** n kitty???

 **katsitter:** yes?? :)

 **that boleyn girl:** u need more therapy

 **katsitter:** >:(

 **J.S.:** Cathy… just flush next time?

 **J.S.:** This is worse than the time you got drunk and had diarrhoea.

 **Regrets &Coffee: **OKAY I GET IT I'LL FLUSH NEXT TIME JUST PLEASE DON'T SAY ANYMORE.

 **Mentally Dead:** I think we all need therapy after seeing that

 **KweenCleves:** n we probs shld start appreciating jane for putting up with our bullshit

 **that boleyn girl:** u tattoo buddies are DISGUSTINFYG

 **katsitter:** at least i dun name my underwear!!!!

 **J.S.:** I'm sorry, what?!

 **that boleyn girl:** leave me alone

 **KweenCleves:** no no lets talks abt tht

 **that boleyn girl:** I SAID LEAVE ME ALONE HISSSSSS

 **Mentally Dead:** I'm not sure which is worse, this chat or the card game you girls played last week

 **J.S.:** Oh I don't mind wiping the floor with the rest again!

 **that boleyn girl:** lololol fuck u janey

 **that boleyn girl:** dun get cocky just bc u won

 **KweenCleves:** yea bitch

 **katsitter:** yea ur goin down jane!

 **katsitter:** but we can go back to being rlly close aftwards rite?

 **J.S.:** Of course!

 **that boleyn girl:** ha u wish

 **that boleyn girl:** this is a ride or die thing losers

 **Mentally Dead:** Isn't that just Uno?

 **Regrets &Coffee: **Yeah, they played a card game that was clearly NOT Uno while we watched.

 **that boleyn girl:** urgh why am i dating such a normie

 **KweenCleves:** want me to resend ur confession video?

 **that boleyn girl:** FUCK NO

 **J.S.:** How is your History thesis coming along Anne?

 **Mentally Dead:** Oh dear god, you broke Bo

 **KweenCleves:** n now shes gremling again

 **katsitter:** oof

 **katsitter:** i dun kno her so byeeeeee

 **Regrets &Coffee: **Class is about to start, so see you later Liebling.

 **KweenCleves:** awww u too <3

 **J.S.:** I'm going to clean the floor because I see period blood all over it.

 **Mentally Dead:** That's so passive-aggressive and that only works if Catherine's still here

 **J.S.:** I'll clean the floor after I cry into the toilet bowl.

 **that boleyn girl:** wait why

 **J.S.:** All the blood reminds me of Katherine's wound…

 **that boleyn girl:** gdi this was so much better when i was screeching

 **Mentally Dead:** No, no it's not

 **that boleyn girl:** anyways dun drop ed in there

 **Mentally Dead:** Why am I even dating you?

* * *

Jane wiped the remaining tears off her cheeks, switching on the tap and splashing her face with cold water. She stared at her reflection in the mirror, a shell of her former self before she had that breakdown. Or was the 'shell' in front of her the real her without all the lying and the evasions? Jane didn't know, she was too tired to start a debate with herself about what was real and what wasn't. Besides, it was already established that the Jane everyone knew for years wasn't who she truly was, so what was the point of asking who was the real one?

The doorbell rang, snapping Jane out from her thoughts. She glanced at her phone, the time was 15 minutes to nine in the morning. She made her way to the door, and opened it to see Katherine greeting her. Jane mustered a smile as she beckoned for the younger woman to enter, locking the door behind her as they went to the living room. Katherine smiled, her green eyes sparkling with delight as she went to greet Leafy.

"You're not wearing your contacts today." Jane commented, noticing that Katherine's eyes weren't their usual pink. Katherine nodded, explaining that she wanted to change up her style a little bit but was reluctant to ransack her cousin's room for clothes. Jane chuckled, somehow her mood always lifted whenever Katherine was around. "Do you want me to fix you some tea? I would offer you a choice between that and coffee, but you know Cathy."

"Tea's fine, thanks Jane!" Katherine replied, soon left alone in the living room with just Leafy. She glanced at her surroundings, they were still minimalistic and white, the same as the first time she stepped into Jane's house. It was the same setting, yet Katherine felt something was different about Jane's house. It felt less distant, and the slight shifts in the objects that are present in the living room gave it a human touch, like someone _actually_ lived there. Jane soon emerged from the kitchen, holding two mugs of hot tea. "Thanks for the tea."

"It's no problem, do you have any classes today?" Jane handed Katherine one of the mugs, and the latter proceeded to blow at the drink's surface. Jane chuckled, watching as Katherine tried to take a sip of her drink but failed as she had burnt her tongue. "Maybe you should let it cool first?"

"Yeah, definitely should." Katherine stuck her tongue out at the drink, the drink mocking her by blurring her vision with steam. With a puff that had a hint of finality to it, she placed the mug on the table. "The thing about being a Theatre major is that the majority of modules are either practicals, or online lessons that don't actually require you to be present at the lecture hall. Plus we have a showcase in June sooo… urgh."

"I see. How are you coping with your major then? You've mentioned that you're considered behind your peers."

"I think I'm getting the hang of it. I do consult Dorothy about some of my mock performances from time to time, she's really good at giving me feedback." Jane raised an eyebrow, she wasn't aware that Katherine had consulted Dorothy for feedback, and more than once too. She dismissed her surprise, it wasn't as if she could be of any help to Katherine, not when their majors are too different from each other. "Oh by the way, I consulted the head of my major about my future plans as a drama practitioner."

"Oh?"

"Yeah, I told her I was looking into using drama as an educational tool and asked if I could take up some modules from your major. She said that she'll give me a list of modules that are relevant to drama, and there are some Psych modules in that list too."

"Psychology and Education? That sounds rather taxing."

"Yeah, but I was thinking… if I could use drama to teach people about society, about morals, about academics, about anything really, I think it would benefit them. See, drama's usually entertaining right? I was thinking, if I could integrate some deeper meaning into drama performances, they could learn something meaningful while having fun. And isn't that what learning is supposed to be?"

"Katherine…" Jane had noticed Katherine's brilliant smile on her face as she explained why she wanted to choose that path, and the passion in her words moved Jane, even though she still didn't understand a few minor parts. "That's a wonderful plan, it's really amazing."

"It's nothing special. If anything, I'm just fucking myself over with the modules."

"They are hard, yes. However, the fact that you had seriously thought of your future life plans in your first year says volumes about you. If you want me to say that you're a mess, I'll oblige, but don't deny that it's impressive." Jane said, looking at Katherine resolutely in the eye. She reached out for Katherine's hands, grasping them gently. "Don't sell yourself short Katherine, you can be a mess _and_ be impressive at the same time."

"... An impressive mess?"

"Sure, let's go with that." Jane recalled her therapist's words to her from their last session, that sometimes it was best if she just accepted that others were broken like her, because what was more important was learning _how_ to pick up the pieces and put them back together again. Jane wondered if she should apply that advice to the current situation, did someone like her even have a right to tell others that they should pick up their pieces? "... Katherine?"

"Yes Jane?"

"I… look, we both know that we're not in a… stable state without our prescriptions… but I… I just want to say that our date back then was memorable. I-I meant up until I left! I… okay stop me if you feel uncomfortable, but I wanted to ask if you would maybe want to do that again sometime soon?" Jane immediately regretted saying it, she wanted to let Katherine heal at her own pace. Yet she couldn't stop her words from tumbling out, something that previous Jane could control. Was that what people really wanted of her, to want things for her own pleasure even if it meant inconveniencing others?

"Yes! I would love to go on a date with you again!" Katherine beamed, to her, anything Jane said or did was able to put her in a good mood almost instantly. It was like her prescriptions, except they didn't taste bitter and had to be taken only once per day. Sure, she knew that right now, she was barely floating in a deep bottomless ocean, but she loved spending time with Jane. After all, she… "I'm really glad you invited me!"

"... Wonderful." Jane had a brief smile as she took a sip of her tea, her face immediately scrunching up shortly after. She was definitely sure that she didn't cry while making tea for them, so why was her drink so salty? Katherine, seeing Jane's expression, took a tiny sip of her tea and gagged. "I'm so sorry. I… I don't know why the tea's so salty…"

"That's okay. Perhaps it's just us, you know, with you being used to slushies and me… actually what _do_ I drink? Coffee? Nah, that's Cathy… Hmm… Anne drinks Pepsi, Anna drinks vodka… I should have a signature drink too! What should my signature drink be Jane?"

"Something sweet?"

"Really?"

"Yes, because you're a sweet person." Katherine blushed at the compliment, for someone who was horrible at puns, Jane was actually good at complimenting people. Jane grinned, interpreting Katherine's facial expression as a positive sign. "Perhaps strawberry soda?"

"Ooh _yes_ , I think I can get Anna to make that without burning the house down!"

* * *

**[SAP]**

_**[12.16 PM]** _

**J.S.:** Okay, can someone explain to me why is there salt in the sugar container?

 **Mentally Dead:** Why would we dump salt in the sugar container?

 **Mentally Dead:** That's something happening at the Holbein unit, not here

 **J.S.:** I added salt into our tea by mistake.

 **Mentally Dead:** 'Our'?

 **J.S.:** Katherine came over to visit earlier.

 **Regrets &Coffee: **Please don't tell me you two agreed on a suicide pact.

 **Mentally Dead:** What?

 **Mentally Dead:** Girl, are you okay?

 **Regrets &Coffee: **I can feel all my blood coming out…

 **J.S.:** Oh heavens, I forgot to mop the floor!

 **Mentally Dead:** Why would they agree on a suicide pact when they're not suicidal?

 **Mentally Dead:** …You aren't suicidal right?

 **J.S.:** Not that I've been informed of.

 **J.S.:** Anyways, who was the last person other than me to use the sugar and salt containers?!

 **Regrets &Coffee: **You know I take my coffee without any sugar, so it's not me.

 **Mentally Dead:** I haven't been drinking coffee or tea recently

 **J.S.:** Well it's definitely not me, even I won't make such a mistake.

 **Regrets &Coffee: **Hang on, didn't Boleyn and Anna come over to our place earlier?

 **Regrets &Coffee: **It was in the morning when you two were in the bathroom.

 **Mentally Dead:** Oh yeah, they did

 **Regrets &Coffee: **I'm not saying this because I'm dating Anna but… Boleyn definitely did it.

 **J.S.:** That's a fair assumption.

 **Mentally Dead:** Girl, I'm dating that bitch and even I'M accusing her

 **J.S.:** Also, I want to get angry but for some reason I can't.

 **Mentally Dead:** Tell me, what do you want to do now that you discovered a new suspect?

 **J.S.:** I want to talk to her about this.

 **J.S.:** And if Anne's really the one who swapped the container lids, I would probably find her and tear her BLOODY HAIR OUT!

 **J.S.:** Wait no, that sounds too aggressive.

 **J.S.:** How do I word it such that I may slip in some hurtful words to her if I discover that she's the culprit?

 **Regrets &Coffee: **Threaten to shove Leafy into her mouth.

 **Mentally Dead:** Girl, are you okay?!

 **Mentally Dead:** What is with your obsession with Leafy these days?!

 **Regrets &Coffee: **I'm NOT obsessed with that fucking cactus!

 **Regrets &Coffee: **They just look cute, that's all!

 **J.S.:** I don't want to come off as being insulting towards people who identify with they/them pronouns, but Leafy's an it.

 **J.S.:** If you don't feel comfortable calling it that, you can use he/him pronouns like what I do.

 **J.S.:** Anyways, I'll update you two about the situation after I talk to Anne about this!

 **Mentally Dead:** … Catherine why didn't you just tell her that it was you?

 **Mentally Dead:** I mean, I did cover for you but that's only because I want to see whether she throws hands with Bo

 **Regrets &Coffee: **Just because she's all slushies and depression doesn't mean that she needs to know that I'm eating sugar and salt in replacement of proper meals.

 **Regrets &Coffee: **Also, she's turning you into a chaotic mess and I'm McLovin' it.

 **Mentally Dead:** Please don't ever say that again

**[that boleyn girl]**

_**[12.30 PM]** _

**J.S.:** I'll get straight to the point, did you switch the container lids for the salt and sugar containers?

 **that boleyn girl:** whtttt

 **that boleyn girl:** i did u a favour

 **that boleyn girl:** they wrnt closed at all when i found em

 **J.S.:** So you DID do something to those containers?

 **that boleyn girl:** only to mix them together n then separate tem

 **J.S.:** … I have no words.

 **J.S.:** By the way, you ruined your cousin's tea.

 **that boleyn girl:** ooh spill the tea janey

 **J.S.:** No, I won't waste a good kettle of tea.

 **that boleyn girl:** bitch it means gimme the deets of ur tea drinking party with her

 **J.S.:** Oh.

 **J.S.:** We talked about her future plans, I had a moment to myself, I told her to not look down on herself, and we agreed to go on a second date.

 **that boleyn girl:** yayyyy depressed lesbians unite!!!!

 **J.S.:** I'm not depressed.

 **that boleyn girl:** oh srry

 **that boleyn girl:** yayyyy ptsd lesbians unite!!!!

 **J.S.:** Since when Katherine's a lesbian?

 **that boleyn girl:** im not gonna go yayyy ptsd wlw ppl unite bc it sound stsupid

 **J.S.:** … But women who like women do exist?

 **that boleyn girl:** urgh u get the idea janey

 **J.S.:** Yeah, I do.

 **J.S.:** Talking with you kills whatever brain cells I have left.

 **that boleyn girl:** EXCUSE ME BITCH WHO TF TAUGHT U TO SAY THT

 **that boleyn girl:** WAS IT CAT?

 **that boleyn girl:** OR WAS IT MY CINNOAMOAL ROLL KITTY???

 **that boleyn girl:** I NEED ANSWERS BITCH!!!!!!!

**[SAP]**

_**[12.39 PM]** _

**J.S.:** I think I made Anne mad.

 **J.S.:** Also, I scrolled up and what the heck Cathy.

 **J.S.:** You could've at least placed the lids back to their respective containers.

 **Regrets &Coffee: **Sorry, I was just… in a daze?

 **J.S.:** Anyways, Anne did do something to the containers.

 **Mentally Dead:** Which is…?

 **J.S.:** She mixed them both together.

 **J.S.:** Which means I'll have to go and buy groceries.

 **J.S.:** Also Cathy, please stop eating sugar and salt because you're too lazy to eat proper meals.

 **J.S.:** Think about Anna.

 **Mentally Dead:** Okay, on one hand I should be concerned about the new you because I'm afraid you would throw yourself off a building for no reason

 **Mentally Dead:** But on the other hand, I love how you're emotionally manipulating Catherine to have a healthy lifestyle and I'm also scared that you're somehow going to use Bo to emotionally manipulate me into doing something

 **Regrets &Coffee: **Have you fucked up your life yet?

 **Mentally Dead:** Other than the time I failed to stop her from eating Jane's chocolate Häagen-Dazs ice cream?

 **Mentally Dead:** Nope

 **J.S.:** I'll buy you one pack of coffee mix Cathy.

 **Regrets &Coffee: **Yay!

 **J.S.:** This will last you until the end of the month.

 **Regrets &Coffee: **JANE SEYMOUR YOU'RE A FUCKING SADIST.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> 1\. Should Anna report Henry to the authorities after hearing that he possess child pornography? Why or why not and what impacts can her decision have on her future?
> 
> 2\. Why is the opinion that people who are nice to others are considered flirts still persisting in society today?
> 
> 3\. Why are open conversations about menstruation not common in society? What does this imply about society's views towards menstruation?
> 
> 4\. Is there a certain age that you need to figure your life out by? Why or why not?


	18. Chapter 18

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is the chapter where Jane and Katherine finally gets together as a romantic pairing, so yeah. Then again, if you're actually reading this chapter, you should've already known by now that Howard/Seymour will be romantic in this story...

The first half of May was an interesting period for Anne and her two roommates. At least, it was interesting to them. For others, they simply saw it as a series of disasters of varying degrees for the three women. In John's case, it was more of an annoyance as well as of concern given his encounters with them as a result of their 'interesting' lives.

The first event was them receiving an eviction notice from their landlord, with the main reason cited as being too loud despite warnings about it. Katherine had immediately accused her cousin over it, given that Anne had been the one screaming her head off most of the time. Anne countered by saying that Katherine had enabled her by screaming back during their fights for dominance. It eventually resulted in them screaming, trying to out-scream each other. Anna had to slap them both to prevent neighbours from complaining _again_ , they were given two weeks to move out and the last thing the Astronomy major wanted was to have their eviction period shortened.

Anne was visibly worried about their impending homelessness status, explaining that she wasn't looking forward to informing her father about their situation. Katherine had suggested joining a sorority to solve their current issue, which Anne immediately shot down because they would eat Anna alive, Katherine was too good for any 'trashy gathering of bitches with cheap Holbein facepaint', and Anne would single-handedly land those poor sorority sisters in jail somehow. Anna then suggested moving into Jane's house since it was already established that it could hold six residents, but her roommates rejected the idea. They had admitted that it was their safest bet and that Jane would gladly allow them to move in, but they didn't want to impose on her as well as their other two friends.

Anna rolled her eyes upon hearing their defence, making a snide comment that Anne didn't want to move in because she wouldn't be able to keep her hands off Catalina. Katherine giggled with agreement, with Anne scowling at them both. Katherine then asked Anna if she would move back to the dormitory, with Anna replying that she wouldn't because it was impossible for her to move in almost at the end of the school year and that she had bad memories with her previous dormmates. They nodded in understanding, eventually deciding to make the most of the time they had at their rented flat unit.

The second event was that the cafe Anna worked at was forced to shut down due to inability to pay rent, and the cafe had to lay off all its workers… well, that was what Anna assumed until she found out that the others had quit a long time ago. Anna took it within stride, and watched as barricades were placed around the cafe to prevent anyone from entering. She was mildly disappointed to see her friends' usual hangout going away, and successfully stole the coffee machine. Katherine had asked her what she would even do with it, and Anna confidently replied that she would learn how to make proper coffee and serve them to Catherine.

That led to the third event, which started off with Anna busying herself around the now bare kitchen on their second last day. Anne watched while Katherine was busy moving the last of their boxes to a van they rented, muttering about how most of the work was done by her. Anne frowned as Anna held up two cups curiously, implying that she didn't know what she was doing.

"Anna, do you even know how to use that hunk of junk?"

"Sure do cupcake-"

"Since when am I a cupcake?" Anne asked with horror, crossing her arms with indignation as Anna playfully stuck out a tongue. "I'm at least a cheesecake!"

"Eh, cupcake, käsekuchen, they're both cakes." Anna replied, fiddling with the coffee machine as it roared to life. They both gulped, unsure if that was what coffee machines were supposed to do. Anna hastily referred to her phone, which contained a WikiHow page on how to use that particular coffee machine. Anne expressed her worry, which was swiftly dismissed by the aspiring barista. "If this works, all three of us can give this place a nice farewell over a cup of German coffee."

"You know how I'm the most chaotic bitch out there right?"

"Ja..."

"And you know that I'm all for terrible decisions that results in jail, rape, or near-death experiences?"

"Uh… ja?"

"So you know that this is a shitty plan if I say that this won't end well right?" Anna dismissed her roommate's concerns with a bark of laughter, and proceeded to enact step two of the guide. Sparks flickered around the machine, and the kitchen soon burst into flames shortly after. "See! This was a horrible idea!"

"Mein gott, it's worse than I thought." Anna remarked as she quickly unplugged the coffee machine from the outlet, coughing as smoke started to fog her vision. "Anne! Did Kat move the last box to the van?!"

"Yeah! I got our phones, so let's leg it!" Anne yelled back, footsteps growing fainter while Anna followed suit. She was almost consumed by the fire as she ran out of the door and towards the lift where Anne was furiously pressing the buttons. "C'mon, c'mon!"

"Anna? What happened to the coffee?" The lift doors opened, revealing Katherine. Before she could ask about the bare hints of fire coming out from their unit, her two roommates shoved her back into the lift, with Anne jabbing her finger on the button for the ground floor repeatedly. "Why the fuck is there fire coming from our- this is why we don't cook Anna!"

"Käsekuchen, calm down." Anna started while cradling the coffee machine, still intact and functioning despite being the cause of the fire. Katherine gave her a confused look, why was Anna calling her a cheesecake? "Sorry, I forgot you weren't Anne."

"Forget that! We should have taken the stairs! Don't they teach you what to do during a fire back in Germany?!"

"Again, I moved here when I was five! Not the point, the point is that we don't have any coffee to bid this place farewell!"

"I'm calling the fire brigade!"

* * *

"Catherine, could you switch on the telly? It's almost time for the seven o'clock news." Catalina asked, the latter obliging as she reached out for the remote left near her. She turned the television on, with the news channel making their preparations. Jane was in the kitchen making tea for the three of them, an attempt to wean Catherine off coffee. "Move over bitch."

"Nope, if you wanna sit on the sofa you gotta- get off me you're heavier than you look!" Catherine exclaimed as Catalina promptly sat on her, the former squirming underneath the Psychology major while the latter chuckled. Catherine immediately allowed Catalina to sit beside her on the sofa the moment Catalina sat up, the English major whining about her broken ankles. "Seymour, why did you buy me coffee when you're not gonna serve me any?"

"It's for everyone but you, anything interesting on the news?" Jane asked, bringing three mugs of tea to the living room. She placed the mugs on the table, the newscaster droning on in the background while Catalina watched.

"Hm, he's saying that there's a fire somewhere." Catalina replied, her eyes bulging out from their sockets as live feed from the site was broadcasted. "Holy fuck, that's our girlfriends' flat!"

"What?!" Both Jane and Catherine focused their attention on the television, with Jane ignoring Catalina's sweeping statement that she was dating Katherine. A large fire roared while numerous residents were gathered a safe distance away from the flat. The reporter on site conducted a series of interviews, with the first one featuring their friends.

 _"Can you tell me what happened?"_ The reporter asked Anne, while Katherine was recorded scowling at Anna. Anne chuckled nervously, shooting fingerguns at the reporter. _"It must be scary."_

 _"Weeeeeell, see me and roommates are fucking shit at cooking. We're supposed to move out tomorrow and Anna- say hi Anna!"_ Anna promptly waved at the camera, unknowingly earning herself looks of disbelief from her friends who were watching the interview. _"Yeah anyways, Anna decided to make coffee with the machine she pinched from her previous workplace. Something went wrong, and the next thing you know, our unit was on fire."_

_"Mein gott, you don't tell people that I stole something from the cafe!"_

_"It must be scary for you three."_ The reporter asked, receiving unrestrained laughter from all three women. He had a puzzled expression on her face as he briefly glanced at the camera before returning back to the interviewees. _"What was running through your minds when the fire started?"_

_"Hmm… I was thinking 'bout how are we gonna escape the scene since Anna started the fire."_

_"My concern was whether the machine is still intact!"_

_"And my concern was about how irresponsible these two are! You don't just flee the scene! You're lucky everyone left their houses when the fire started!"_

"Jesus Christ, what the hell was your girlfriend thinking?!" Catalina commented, earning herself a shrug from Catherine. Jane was more concerned that their friends were evicted from their flat and probably had no place to stay. "Oh god, how did they manage to set the whole flat on fire?"

 _"Anyway so yeah, we're homeless, we made everyone really angry at us, and I think my girlfriend watches this channel's news so hi Cat!"_ Anne waved at the camera, embarrassing Catalina. Catherine smirked, nudging said woman playfully. _"You two c'mon, say hi to your girlfriends- oh wait I forgot Kitty's not dating Janey."_

 _"Let's move on to someone else!"_ The reporter hurriedly made his way off-screen and towards a policeman, who was soon revealed to be John. He sighed as he stared at the burning flat and then at the culprit, clearly annoyed at what he had to deal with that evening. _"Can you tell us more about the fire?"_

_"The fire brigade's definitely doing their best to put it out, and the police are here to assist them in keeping the residents calm."_

"Your brother is so done with their shit, just look at his face." Catherine laughed, pointing to John's deadpan expression as he was interviewed by the reporter, frowning briefly before returning to his deadpan expression. Jane sighed, she pitied her brother for having to deal with their friends so often.

"I'm calling Katherine, poor dear really needs new friends and relatives."

* * *

"And… you're _sure_ you're gonna accept rent money from us?" Anne asked in disbelief, she thought that it would take a lot more persuading on her end to convince Jane to accept rent money. Jane nodded, noting the disbelief in her friends' faces. "Wow… okay, that… that went a lot better in my head."

"I figured I could earn some easy pocket-money from you girls, it's a win-win for all of us too." Jane said as she lifted a box and led the three women into her house where her other two roommates were. She sighed as she witnessed Catalina trying to prevent Catherine from getting too attached to Leafy, with Anna cheering her girlfriend on. "Are the three of you hurt though?"

"We're fine, thanks for asking Jane!" Katherine beamed, carrying a box of her own as Jane led them to their bedrooms. Anne decided to laze around in the living room, giving her cousin an opportunity to spend some alone time with Jane. Jane decided to lead Katherine to her bedroom first since they were both carrying boxes belonging to her. "Sorry that you have to help us, those two are just… you get the idea."

"It's fine, I don't mind helping you out."

"Are you saying that you won't help Anne or Anna?"

"Hmm… they have their own girlfriends to boss around, don't they?" They both shared a laugh, with Katherine being pleasantly surprised at how Jane easily smiled as of late. She wondered if it was her prescriptions working out for her, or if Jane was finally happier with herself. "By the way Katherine, are you aware that Lina was freaking out just now while we watched the news?"

"Oof, I don't blame her. The interview went… poorly, to say the least."

"Oh, I don't think it was that bad. But yes, Lina started to list down all the reasons why your cousin shouldn't be allowed to live on her own, she was on fire!"

"... You just set yourself up for a pun, didn't you?"

"I couldn't smoke my way out of that one huh?"

"And you're doing it again!"

"Katherine, you could at least let me go out in a blaze of glory." Jane chuckled as she set down the box in Katherine's bedroom, the latter rolling her eyes good-naturedly as she set her own box down. "I think the prescriptions are doing fine for me, I haven't felt so…"

"At ease?" Jane briskly nodded, agreeing with Katherine. "I get you, sometimes it takes a few types before you feel lighter, and sometimes, I don't know if feeling lighter is a good thing."

"I think it's understandable, it's a change in your life that you're trying to adapt to. My therapist tells me that feeling this way is normal, and I shouldn't be tempted to slip back to my old ways just because I want to feel comfortable."

"Haha, kinda feels like they're not doing what they're supposed to do don't they?"

"Yeah. Though… before I went to therapy, I… I felt that I didn't deserve any help, that I deserve to die. But now… okay who am I kidding, I still feel that way sometimes. It's just… I think I have the strength to accept that I did the best I could back then, and that it's… not my fault?" Katherine nodded her head slowly, she found it surprising that she could relate to Jane so easily.

"I get you, like seriously, I _really_ get you. Sure, I don't feel like I should be the one dying but the guilt's still there for fucking up everybody's lives. And… part of me still blames myself for not preventing them from sexually abusing me. I don't think that would ever really go away, but I know that I need to confront it head on, and remember that there are people in my corner. Well, knowing and actually believing are two different things but fuck that."

"It's really strange that for a long time I've been… well, me. Then all of a sudden, I feel like there's a sun shining through the clouds and is… is that normal? That can't be normal right? Isn't therapy a long process?"

"You might wanna talk to your therapist about it, but if it was me? I'll just go 'fuck it' and enjoy that ray of sunshine before I go back to my normal. That way, maybe one day, I can emulate that same warmth and I don't have to make everyone be careful around me." Katherine looked at Jane warmly, comforted that Anne or Anna wasn't around to god forbid, chuck Leafy at them for no reason. Jane could feel her face heating up, and immediately pressed a hand against her cheek. "Jane, your face looks red! Are you alright?"

"Okay, so we open the door and splash cold water at Janey to make her sick right?" Katherine and Jane turned their attention to the door, frowning as whispers were heard on the other side of the door. "Or should we make Kitty sick?"

"Kat's too healthy, we've better luck with Jane."

"Why couldn't Anna just make some coffee for Seymour? Isn't it better to give her food poisoning than a raging fever?"

"What the hell are you three doing outside?!" Catalina's voice was heard, as well as terrified squealing from the other three. Katherine winced as Catalina was soon the one screaming in terror, while Jane wondered why did the tables turn on them. "Just leave them alone to kiss!"

"C'mon ladies, T-pose harder! And then, we're gonna force the fairy tale ending down my cousin's and Janey's throats!"

"... This is literally the first time I felt so threatened, and Henry had threatened me before."

"Oh my god Jane, same."

* * *

"Oh hey Cathy, you're up?" Anna had just returned from her morning jog and entered the kitchen to have a morning snack, only to see Catherine making coffee for herself with the stolen coffee machine. Catherine grumbled in response, she needed at least a cup of coffee each day in order to function, something that Jane failed to understand in her opinion. Anna decided to strike up a conversation once her girlfriend consumed her daily cup of coffee, which was a good 15 minutes later. "Oh hey Cathy, how's that coffee?"

"Not bad, and to answer your first question, I haven't been sleeping at all."

"Was? Warum?"

"Uh… let me pull up Duolingo to translate that. I downloaded the motherfucking app because I want to know what Aragón's saying while she sleeps. Hold on Liebling." Catherine muttered as she entered said application, impatiently tapping on the German words she had learnt until she reached the words she needed to translate. "Okay um… I don't know why I haven't been sleeping, but it's okay! I've stayed up for five nights straight and I didn't die! I think. I probably died on the inside but Seymour or Aragón doesn't need to know that."

"Huge yikes there Cathy, that's not healthy at all." Anna was concerned, she was aware that her girlfriend didn't have the healthiest sleep cycle but hearing it from the woman herself made it even more concerning. Especially so since Catherine sounded so damn proud of herself. "Just… I don't know, you're probably immune to caffeine at this point so cutting down on coffee won't work…"

"Anna, I'm fine. Really. I'm pretty sure I could ransack the kitchen for some sleepy-time tea Seymour has to knock people out."

"... Sleepy-time tea?" Anna hid a snort as her lips curled up into a smile at the mention of the nickname. Catherine flushed with embarrassment, the last thing she wanted was for her girlfriend to see her as a dork. "That's so cute Cathy."

"... Recently, I find that I'm seen as either a dork or a nerd more often than cool."

"Oh Cathy, you know they can always go hand in hand. You're a badass that ruins people's lives with a few clacks on a keyboard and have a voice that's impossible to ignore because it's just so alluring. You're a fucking nerd when it comes to female authors who specialise in pining. You're a dork for trying to hit on Leafy when he probs has a thing for Edward. And you know what? That's okay, because they're all a part of you. And we all love you the way you are, romantic or not."

"This is literally the best morning ever, and I hate mornings." Catherine averted her eyes away from Anna out of embarrassment, sipping her coffee instead of chugging it down like her life depended on it. She had a faint smile on her face, she wasn't used to being praised for her personality. Anna said nothing, instead opting for a comfortable silence between them. "Hey uh… this might send signals that I don't want to send, but how would you like to meet my parents?"

"Aren't they overseas celebrating their anniversary?"

"It has been months now, I don't think they'll celebrate for that long. They actually live fairly nearby, we can even take either the Circle or District Lines and walk from the nearest station. Besides, I want them to meet you. Whether or not you want to be introduced as a close friend or as my girlfriend is up to you, and I'll respect your decision."

"Well fuck, do they know that I'm chaotic as hell?"

"Uh… no? I haven't introduced Aragón to them either, they only know about Seymour due to her brother."

"Anything I should take note of?"

"Hmm… maybe don't dab or yeet in front of them? And I guess don't burn the house down? Otherwise, they're pretty normal parents." Catherine shrugged, her parents were considered normal when it came to raising children. Anna nodded, considering Catherine's offer. She wasn't opposed to meeting Catherine's parents, as long as they weren't as bad as Anne's relatives, she figured that she could handle them.

"Sure, I don't mind visiting them. Are they comfortable with you dating women or…?"

"They gave me support when Johanna and I broke up, oof I cried for an hour back then."

"And they know that she's…"

"Trans? Yeah, they're open-minded. I think Seymour would've lost her head back then."

"Okay, when should we meet them?"

"We could meet them for lunch today, I think their schedules are free."

"Wait, what?"

* * *

"So… suddenly feeling happy after being not is… normal?" Jane asked her therapist, who nodded solemnly as she took down notes. "Are you sure?"

"Jane, different people have different experiences. Just because most responses online say that it takes them a while for them to feel a sense of ease doesn't mean that there aren't cases of patients experiencing a sudden change."

"Ms Blount, what does this mean for me? Does it mean that I'll permanently be happier as long as I take my prescriptions?"

"Oh dear god, no. There's an almost definite risk of you being addicted to your prescriptions, so no, at one point you're definitely not going to be on them."

"And I can go back to slushed ice?"

"... Why do you sound so excited about that? Anyways, yes. One day, you can return to slushies." The therapist sighed, she felt that she was dealing with a slushie addict rather than a patient with PTSD and depression. Jane nodded, hopeful that she could taste the overly sweet semi-frozen liquid once more. "From my observations, there is a positive trend in your responses. To say it generally, your mental state is gradually becoming more stable."

"But I still have to attend therapy sessions until I'm actually okay in the head else I'll relapse or something and end up dead somewhere right?"

"If you want to put it that way, yes. Alright, so what have you been doing the past week?"

"I've… cleaned the house? And… made meals for my roommates. What else? Um… I reviewed my final thesis before submission, and I guess I had a nice conversation with someone I really like." Jane had a hard time remembering what she had done the past week, the days went by in a blur. Her therapist nodded, noting down the response. "Ms Blount, I read online that therapists don't usually talk about the patients' childhood. So why did I have to go through it?"

"How did you feel when I asked you to describe your childhood during our first session?"

"Uncomfortable, it felt like I was digging up memories that I don't want to remember."

"What else did your online research mention?"

"That therapy sessions are usually uncomfortable because the main purpose is to get the patients to face their source of their problems… oh."

"You're right in saying that therapists don't usually ask patients to talk about their childhood, but for me, I get patients to talk about themselves to get a better feel of their problems. We can easily tell how you feel about a topic mentioned in passing just by observing your body language." The therapist replied, tapping her board with the tip of her pen. "Any form of self-care?"

"Does watering Leafy and hugging Edward count?"

"How do you feel when engaging in these two activities?"

"I guess… I feel a sense of comfort? I do feel more at ease…"

"Mmhm, you've mentioned that the person you're interested in was also the one that you tried to save… how do you feel whenever you interact with them?"

"I feel happier, I always look forward to talking with her. It's very easy to hold a conversation with her, especially since we have many things in common."

"For example?"

"We're _both_ seeing a therapist!" Jane's therapist frowned, sighing deeply. She wanted to applaud at her patient's cheerfulness, she truly did, but Jane had unfortunately missed the mark. "And we're _also_ depressed!"

"I can't tell if you're being sarcastic or not. Alright fine, tell me more about her then." The therapist noted that Jane broke into a genuine smile as she started talking about what she liked about Katherine and how she felt around the younger woman. She noted that Katherine had a positive impact in Jane's life, and had long become a support system for her patient. Given her observations, she felt that it was safe to consider Katherine as a healthy aspect in Jane's life despite her patient's concerning comments. "That's very interesting. By the way Jane, I would like to try something different for this week."

"I don't mind, what is it?"

"Take it as a homework of sorts." The therapist replied, tapping her pen against the board repeatedly. "Does she know that you're romantically interested in women?"

"She does, she's the first one I came out to. Officially, that is."

"I see, how about asking her out on a date?"

"We've made plans to go on another one, we just haven't settled the date yet."

"... Okay, is it a romantic date or just a date between friends?"

"We… didn't make that clear, but it's just a period to hang out with each other with no interruptions!"

"Alright then, your homework for the week is to bring her on a romantic date." Jane blinked, how was her homework supposed to help her with her main problems? Just because she dwelled less on that night and blamed herself less didn't mean that she was ready to dive into the dating pool. The therapist sighed, aware that her patient was doubting her. "There's a reason behind this, think of it as an engaging way to step out of your comfort zone when it comes to facing rejection."

"I _knew_ someone would agree with me when I say that Katherine's going to reject me!" The therapist pinched the bridge of her nose, hastily scrawling on her board that Jane's cheerfulness always came in at the wrong moments.

"Perhaps I've worded it wrongly. I should've said that it's a good way to be yourself around others, and I felt that starting it with someone you fully trust is a good way to go about it."

"So… how does the rejection come in?"

"That was a slip of the tongue on my part. Do you have any questions?"

"Why does it have to be romantic?"

"During one of your sessions with me, I believe it was the third one, you've mentioned that you're not comfortable with your identity as a… what was the term you used back then?" The therapist started flipping through her notes, eventually settling on a messily written piece of paper. "Ah yes, you mentioned that till now, you're not fully comfortable with your identity as a lesbian."

"Before we move on, you just mean my sexual identity right? Not who I am as a person… right?"

"Yes, I'm referring to your sexual identity." The therapist replied, jotting down a note about how Jane might also be struggling to form an identity of her own. Jane nodded briskly, a question answered. "Anyways, the idea that you will be rejected without trying has been ingrained in you, and I hope to reverse that."

"And you think asking Katherine out on a romantic date is a good way to reverse it?"

"A bit drastic, but some people _do_ manage to learn how to swim for the first time in the deep end of the pool."

"When I first learnt that I have to attend therapy, this is definitely not what I expected..."

* * *

Catalina and Anne nearly leapt off the sofa as Jane returned, slamming the door close as she made her way towards the living room, breathless and her face was red. She frowned as she noticed the state of undress her two roommates were in, their expressions akin to being caught trying to steal sweets from the refrigerator.

"You two could at least do it in your bedrooms."

"Janey, it's called a change of environment." Anne replied, reaching out for her t-shirt which was hanging off the edge of the sofa. Catalina blushed as she fumbled with the buttons on her blouse, unable to look at her best friend. Jane shook her head and walked towards Leafy, cooing to him about the horrors he had to endure. "Bitch, don't make it sound like we've been doing kinky shit."

"Oh, really? Then why did Cathy say that she saw you 'riding', whatever that means, Lina? She also said that there were candles and a whip at that time, don't tell me that the candles were for relaxation!" Anne and Catalina were speechless, they didn't expect Catherine to reveal that night to their friends, especially Jane. "Please tell me that night was the worst so far."

"Janey, believe me when I say that you can do _a lot_ with a jumbo dildo and rope."

"Bo, shut up! There's a time to corrupt someone and there's a time to _not_ corrupt someone!" Jane cringed, she didn't know what the hell a dildo was but knowing Anne as well as the topic of conversation, it was most likely a tool used in sex. "So uh, Anna and Catherine are having lunch with the Parrs. Kat's exercising now, she'll be back later so… what do you want for lunch?"

"Plastic, now I need your help." Jane dismissed the question, she had her own problems to deal with, the biggest one being how to ask her crush out on a date. The couple wanted to express their concerns about Jane wanting to eat plastic items for lunch, but decided against it. "Let me practice a few lines with you."

"By 'you', do you mean her or me?" Anne asked, shooting Jane a questioning look. Catalina nodded in agreement, trying to push Anne off her but instead made her girlfriend lie on her like she was a bed. Jane shrugged, on one hand, she would rather run lines with her best friend who wouldn't judge her as much, but then again, Anne's personality was somewhat similar to Katherine's. "Okay, lay it on both of us then. Hit it Janey."

"Katherine, please go out on a romantic date with me because my therapist said so and also I kind of like you that way?" Anne and Catalina were stunned, that wasn't the kind of help they expected Jane to ask for. Not just that, they were speechless at how bad the Education major was at asking someone out on an actual date. "... Thoughts?"

"That's the _absolute_ worst confession I've ever heard of, and that includes the ones I said to Kitty." Anne remarked, disgust overwhelming her as she purposely made retching sounds to emphasise her point. Catalina facepalmed, she understood that confessions were difficult to execute, but never had she seen someone confess so badly in real life.

"Jane, we love you-"

"I don't."

"-but that's not the way you should confess."

"Isn't it better to be honest with Katherine?"

"Yes… but your phrasing… just… no." Catalina sighed, while Jane was visibly panicking. Anne was still in the middle of proving her point, which didn't do anything to help Jane. "How about you switch things up, try confessing to her _then_ asking her out on a date."

"But my homework is to bring her out on a romantic date! Shouldn't I bring her out on a date and then maybe confess to her?"

"Janey, your therapist is indirectly asking you to fucking confess to Kitty _before_ bringing her on a romantic date. It's literally so simple."

"You had a hard time confessing to Lina!"

"It wasn't easy for me okay?!"

"What makes you think that I have it easy?!"

"Ladies, please! Stop quarreling when it's obvious that you're _both_ shit at confessions." Anne and Jane stopped, sparing Catalina an incredulous look. The Psychology major groaned, when in doubt, consult WikiHow. So she did, and instantly found a webpage that taught people how to confess to their crush. "Jane, do you want to confess in a creative manner or do you want to rip the plaster off?"

"Which one sounds better?"

"Have you tried confessing to Kat at all?" Jane thought about Catalina's words, and realised that she had indeed tried to confess to Katherine on Valentine's Day, albeit in an extremely roundabout way. She nodded, which surprised her two friends as they didn't expect Jane to have confessed at all. "Wait a minute, how did you…?"

"I came out to her previously in a questionably intimate setting."

"Oh honey, no. That's not a confession."

"I mean… Janey _did_ confess, but not the kind we're talking 'bout here." Anne sighed, they really did have their work cut out for them. Jane whimpered, she knew she was bad, but she didn't feel that she was that bad. Her two friends pitied her, and decided to help her first before commenting on her confession skills. "Okay okay, you look like the type that would probably bolt off so maybe write her a letter?"

"I'm not sure if paying Cathy to help me write a letter is appropriate."

"Wha- no! Jane Seymour, you're not supposed to get Catherine to help you write a letter! You're supposed to write it yourself!"

"B-But I'm not an articulate person!"

"It's literally just saying some of Kitty's good points that you're in love with, then write that you're in love with her before signing off."

"W-What if I screw up and she thinks that I'm only into her because she's the only single friend left among us?"

"How- y'know what, forget it. I don't wanna know how you manage to come up with that conclusion." Anne grumbled, she didn't know if Jane was toying with them or not. A quick glance at her girlfriend told her that no, Jane was taking it seriously, and that made Anne pity her roommate a lot more. "Okay, let's just go with the verbal confession route. Janey, try confessing to us again but _don't_ say whatever you've just said."

"Um… Katherine, I'm in love with you and even though it's technically homework my therapist gave me, do you want to do something together that is considered romantic?"

"Jane, you just paraphrased your first confession."

"W-What am I supposed to say?!" Unbeknownst to the three women, the door opened and Katherine entered, back from her exercise. She was about to call out to them after locking the door, but stopped after she heard what Jane said to her friends. "Katherine, I love you and I know you think that I'll be like the men in your life and it's okay because I'll do anything to prove to you that I sincerely love you and may I take you out on a date that I haven't planned for and will definitely beg either Anna or Lina to help?!"

"That was-"

"Sweet." Catalina was about to say that it was terrible, but Katherine had beaten her to it. The three women were startled, casting their attention at the entrance where Katherine was, a hesitant smile on her face as she awkwardly waved back at them. "... Um, I could come back later?"

"H-How long have you been there…?" Jane asked, the thought that Katherine had witnessed her numerous attempts to confess embarrassed her. Katherine made her way towards the living room, tenderly placing her hands on Jane's shoulders. "... I didn't know you can reject people by giving them a shoulder pat…"

"No Jane, I'm not rejecting you. I… I'm also interested in you, and yes, I would love to go out on a date with you that either Anna or Lin-Lin has planned for us." Katherine replied, she was surprised at herself for being less scared about expressing her feelings, that she was willing to make them tangible. Anne whistled in the background, which earnt herself a light chop to the head from Catalina. Jane's grey eyes widened with surprise, unable to process the information given.

"Urgh, you two are making my teeth rot."

"Shut the fuck up babe."

* * *

**[protect the babies squad]**

_**[3.47 PM]** _

**that boleyn girl:** im a great wingwoman

 **Mentally Dead:** You sent them out to buy alcohol, how's that helping?

 **KweenCleves:** wait wtf did we miss

 **that boleyn girl:** oh janey confessed to kitty

 **that boleyn girl:** n kitty accepted bc shes asking jane if she can conisdr themselves gfs

 **Regrets &Coffee: **God damn it, I can't believe I missed that.

 **Mentally Dead:** Trust me, Jane was shit at confessing

 **Mentally Dead:** The only reason Kat knows about it is because she returned from her run while Jane was still practicing

 **KweenCleves:** ok but like whos worse jane or anne

 **Mentally Dead:** I don't know actually, probably Jane?

 **KweenCleves:** OOF

 **that boleyn girl:** soooo spill

 **that boleyn girl:** hows lunch with the fancy parrs

 **KweenCleves:** they panicked when they saw me

 **Mentally Dead:** Oh honey, they shouldn't

 **Mentally Dead:** Just because you're tall, look intimidating, and a racial minority doesn't mean they should be scared of you

 **Regrets &Coffee: **No, they panicked because they were watching the news channel yesterday.

 **that boleyn girl:** ohhhhhhhhhh

 **that boleyn girl:** i forgot she burnt down the flat

 **Regrets &Coffee: **Boleyn, it was literally last night.

 **that boleyn girl:** yeet

 **Mentally Dead:** Anyways, Bo sent those two out to buy alcohol and told them to think of it as a date

 **KweenCleves:** oof shopping does scream romantic aft all

 **Regrets &Coffee: **And you're not afraid that Hurricane Howard wouldn't be a thing?

 **Mentally Dead:** Catherine, you need to understand something

 **Mentally Dead:** Among the three of them, Kat is actually considered the most reasonable

 **KweenCleves:** wht no

 **KweenCleves:** thts me

 **that boleyn girl:** uh huh rmb last jan ur all lets nerf each other

 **KweenCleves:** omggggg i still hv those

 **KweenCleves:** theres like four guns sooooo

 **that boleyn girl:** omg we can all gang up on those two n nerf em

 **KweenCleves:** yaaaaaaaas

 **Mentally Dead:** This is a one-way ticket straight to disaster

 **Regrets &Coffee: **Liebling, if you want to cause chaos, I have a cleaner option.

 **KweenCleves:** ?

 **Regrets &Coffee: **There's a Monopoly set in my bedroom, we can bring it back and play it with the rest.

 **that boleyn girl:** hhhhhhhhhhhhhhh monopoly

 **that boleyn girl:** do u not see how easily we can cheat

 **KweenCleves:** how tf do u cheat at monopoly

 **that boleyn girl:** oh u kno the heists the jailbreak the landowner suddenly increasing prices n the inflation

 **Mentally Dead:** What kind of Monopoly did you even play…?

 **that boleyn girl:** wht do u mean?

 **that boleyn girl:** isnt tht how its played?

 **Regrets &Coffee: **No.

 **KweenCleves:** wtf obvs no

 **Mentally Dead:** When they come back with the set, you're going to explain to us how the fuck does one cheat at Monopoly

 **that boleyn girl:**?

 **that boleyn girl:** am i the odd one out or smth

 **KweenCleves:** take a hint anne

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> 1\. Was Anne really in a position to not consider staying with Jane as an option despite the lack of options she had?
> 
> 2\. Should Anna have stolen something from the cafe she worked at even though it was closing down? Why or why not?
> 
> 3\. Was it right of Anne and Anna to attempt to shirk responsibility for starting the fire? Why or why not?
> 
> 4\. What's the significance of Catherine inviting Anna to have lunch with her parents?
> 
> 5\. Is it ethical of Jane's therapist to force Jane to invite Katherine out on a romantic date as part of the 'homework' assigned to Jane? Explain.


	19. Chapter 19

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is the chapter where it is revealed that Jane and Katherine are second cousins and therefore making their relationship incestual. You've been warned.

**[Seymour Surprise]**

_**[10.50 AM]** _

**Regrets &Coffee: **Okay Howard, you know the drill right?

 **katsitter:** her therapy ends at noon n im waiting outside

 **katsitter:** why do i hv to follow her in the morning anyways

 **Mentally Dead:** Because if you suddenly show up at the therapist's without any warning, she's going to get suspicious

 **DorothyofOz:** Do we need to be this secretive?

 **that boleyn girl:** remind me again why did we include the less bitchy seymours into this chat

 **KweenCleves:** bc we wanted to surprise jane n show her tht her fam does care

 **KweenCleves:** or rather thts wht our gfs n ur cuz r going for

 **that boleyn girl:** shouldnt we bring her the whole package

 **H.S.:** Unless you want to leave a bad impression on our family, it's best if it's just us.

 **that boleyn girl:** ok who tf invited this creepo

 **Regrets &Coffee: **That's just Henry.

 **Mentally Dead:** Oh hell no, he's going to hell

 **Regrets &Coffee: **I MEAN SEYMOUR'S BROTHER.

 **LongJohnSilvers:** Why isn't Tommy in this group?

 **Regrets &Coffee: **Do you really want a paedophile present at your sister's birthday party?

 **LongJohnSilvers:** … Fair point.

 **DorothyofOz:** Oh thank the lord, I'm not the only one who knows about Tommy's secret stash of porn.

 **H.S.:** Does this mean that we can finally address it?

 **katsitter:** ooh family bonding

 **KweenCleves:** wait so all of u kno abt his porn???

 **DorothyofOz:** To be fair to him, they were all in HD.

 **H.S.:** And his magazines had really quality ink.

 **LongJohnSilvers:** Ms Parr, please file a report against him so that we have a reason to arrest him.

 **Regrets &Coffee: **Too much work, rather steal Edward instead.

 **that boleyn girl:** no one can resist the squishy plushie of death tht costed me 40 pounds

 **katsitter:** oh put a sock it in cuz

 **Mentally Dead:** Stop fucking spamming ladies and start helping out!

 **DorothyofOz:** Okay, who has claims to the Spanish bitch?

 **H.S.:** Since when do you swear?

 **DorothyofOz:** Since Jane abandoned me when she left for London.

 **that boleyn girl:** fam fite aside yes i hv dibs to cat

 **DorothyofOz:** Tell her to stop making the food spicy and get her out of the kitchen!

 **Regrets &Coffee: **Well fuck me gently with a chainsaw, I'm fucked for dinner later.

 **H.S.:** Oh actually I do have a chainsaw in the garden shed.

 **LongJohnSilvers:** It's an expression Henry.

 **katsitter:** okkkkk so someone tell me wtf shld i do now

 **KweenCleves:** idk???

 **KweenCleves:** bring her on a date

 **Mentally Dead:** If you're going to buy groceries, get us canned food and pepper

 **that boleyn girl:** we hv enough of those tho

 **Mentally Dead:** Also get more coffee

 **that boleyn girl:** srsly how r we all out

 **KweenCleves:** cathy found a coffee buddy in our cop mate

 **DorothyofOz:** You're all horrible friends, and I don't get what Jane sees in all of you.

 **LongJohnSilvers:** Don't be too harsh on all of them.

 **that boleyn girl:** how dare u insult kitty

 **Regrets &Coffee: **Right, how dare you?

 **Mentally Dead:** It's one thing to insult Bo, but no one should insult Kat

 **KweenCleves:** yea imma go try my hand at shipping jane with ozgirl just to spite her

 **H.S.:** Oh, I can help you proofread it.

 **DorothyofOz:** FUCK YOU ALL.

 **LongJohnSilvers:** LANGUAGE!

* * *

**[make araleyn a thing!]**

_**[12.05 PM]** _

**KweenCleves:** [urghrlly.jpg]

 **katsitter:** holy shitttttt

 **Regrets &Coffee: **That is a waste of batter.

 **J.S.:** Is that for my birthday?

 **KweenCleves:** whts a bd

 **Regrets &Coffee: **Liebling, when we said play dumb, we didn't mean that dumb.

 **Regrets &Coffee: **Also Seymour, your birthday's tomorrow.

 **J.S.:** My therapist literally wished me a happy birthday before swearing.

 **Regrets &Coffee: **Why did she swear?

 **katsitter:** she saw me

 **KweenCleves:** kat ur a rlly attractive woman who can do no wrong bc ur so innocent n adorbs

 **KweenCleves:** jane pls tell me u yeeted her out of the inwodw

 **katsitter:** we hv the same therapist anna

 **Regrets &Coffee: **And… she didn't realise that beforehand?

 **katsitter:** she didnt expect us to kno each other

 **katsitter:** n now she regrets giving us homework

 **J.S.:** What was your homework anyways?

 **katsitter:** to outright confess to u

 **KweenCleves:** [araleynnom.jpg]

 **katsitter:** HA I CALLED IT

 **katsitter:** CATHY I TOLD U CUZ WAS THE ONE WITH THE BITE KINK

 **Regrets &Coffee: **SHIT.

 **J.S.:** Are you two betting on them?!

 **Regrets &Coffee: **It's harmless!

 **Regrets &Coffee: **God damn it, I thought Boleyn was the one who would bite Aragón…

 **katsitter:** lmaoooo

 **KweenCleves:** hold up doesnt catalina hv the bite kink since shes the one biting???

 **katsitter:** lol thts not how it works

 **katsitter:** the one with the bite kink is the one tht loves being bitten

 **KweenCleves:** ill go check ltr

 **KweenCleves:** btw is leafy edible

 **J.S.:** Why?

 **KweenCleves:** bc someone wanted to toss him onto the pot n eat him

 **J.S.:** Leafy can be eaten, but I'll be very upset.

 **Regrets &Coffee: **Oh boy.

 **J.S.:** Please don't tell me Leafy's being cooked as we speak.

 **KweenCleves:** dun worry we managed to save leafy

 **KweenCleves:** also araleyns kicked out of the kitchen

 **KweenCleves:** its for the best rlly

 **Regrets &Coffee: **Anyways, have fun on your date.

* * *

**[London Seymours W/O Tommy+Jane]**

_**[3.20 PM]** _

**H.S.:** I can't believe I'm saying this, but Jane's friends aren't what I expected.

 **DorothyofOz:** They made Jane sick.

 **LongJohnSilvers:** According to her, it was the coffee that made her sick.

 **DorothyofOz:** Yeah but who was the one who fed her that coffee poison?!

 **LongJohnSilvers:** That boils down to the quality of the coffee brewed at that cafe, not her friends.

 **LongJohnSilvers:** Also, Ms Parr admitted that Jane was the one who willingly consumed seven cups of coffee.

 **H.S.:** Tommy's ex is much more normal than I expected.

 **DorothyofOz:** Urgh she's a fucking nerd and is basically a baby.

 **LongJohnSilvers:** DOROTHY SEYMOUR, MIND YOUR LANGUAGE.

 **LongJohnSilvers:** Ms Parr is a nice woman, it's Ms Boleyn that I'm concerned about…

 **DorothyofOz:** What the hell did she do to you?

 **LongJohnSilvers:** Not counting the incidents where she was the victim, she's involved in quite a few cases involving Henry Tudor.

 **H.S.:** Oh, that brat.

 **H.S.:** Can I say that he's a fucking dick?

 **LongJohnSilvers:** No!

 **LongJohnSilvers:** How do you know him anyways?

 **H.S.:** Through work, he's being groomed to take over the Tudor business.

 **DorothyofOz:** Yeesh, I heard nightmare stories from Jane's girlfriend.

 **LongJohnSilvers:** All six of them have dated that Henry.

 **H.S.:** O_O

 **H.S.:** I'm surprised they get along as well as they do now.

 **H.S.:** Look at them, they're dating each other!

 **H.S.:** I think.

 **DorothyofOz:** Spanish bitch is dating crazy bitch, nerd is dating jock.

 **DorothyofOz:** So yeah, they're all dating each other.

 **LongJohnSilvers:** Dorothy, you'll be staying with us starting from July onwards right?

 **DorothyofOz:** You're sure I won't bother you and your almost-husband?

 **H.S.:** Why don't you just stay in the dorms?

 **DorothyofOz:** "Hey Mum, may I stay in the dormitories when I enter university?"

 **DorothyofOz:** "Dorothy Seymour! I cannot believe that you want to live with sinners for four whole years!"

 **DorothyofOz:** "Look at Jane, do you think she can remain the way she is if she stayed in that breeding ground for plague?!"

 **DorothyofOz:** So yeah, what do you think?

 **H.S.:** Didn't John inform us that Jane's mentally unwell?

 **DorothyofOz:** Mum doesn't have to know that.

 **DorothyofOz:** Doubt Jane wants the Salisbury Seymours to know anyways.

 **H.S.:** I'm just glad that Jane has found someone to share her life with.

 **LongJohnSilvers:** I'm just glad that it's not Ms Boleyn.

 **LongJohnSilvers:** By the way, Robert's into genealogy.

 **DorothyofOz:** So?

 **LongJohnSilvers:** He helped me find out more about our family tree, guess what I've found out?

 **H.S.:** What?

 **LongJohnSilvers:** Ms Boleyn and Ms Howard are our second cousins…

 **H.S.:** As long as Jane is happy, I don't care if this is considered incest.

 **H.S.:** No, I don't condone incest but really this is the first time I've seen Jane so happy.

 **H.S.:** And right now, I care more about my sister's happiness than the sheer disgust I'm experiencing now.

 **LongJohnSilvers:** I've to admit, it's definitely more genuine than the ones we saw in the past…

 **DorothyofOz:** Well, tall and pink is a really good person as much as I don't want to give Jane to someone else...

 **H.S.:** Besides, they're both women therefore having an offspring with birth defects isn't a possibility.

 **H.S.:** I still feel uncomfortable knowing that Jane's dating a cousin though.

 **DorothyofOz:** OOH JANE CAN USE THIS TO SPITE MUM!

 **LongJohnSilvers:** Exactly what happened to you while we're gone?!

 **DorothyofOz:** Fine, are you concerned about incest?

 **LongJohnSilvers:** The Bible didn't say that it was a sin… I think.

 **DorothyofOz:** And what matters more, Jane's happiness or the law?

 **LongJohnSilvers:** Cousin marriages are allowed.

 **DorothyofOz:** See, you get it John.

 **H.S.:** Should we tell them at one point?

 **DorothyofOz:** I vote that we tell them AFTER they get married!

 **LongJohnSilvers:** FOR HEAVEN'S SAKE, NO DOROTHY!

 **H.S.:** I'm going to mingle with one of Jane's friends, which one should I choose?

 **LongJohnSilvers:** Either Ms Parr or Ms de Aragón.

 **DorothyofOz:** Henry's going to get eaten alive.

 **LongJohnSilvers:** Have some faith in them.

* * *

**[blue n red]**

_**[4.13 PM]** _

**that boleyn girl:** sup bitches

 **J.S.:** Hello to you too Anne.

 **that boleyn girl:** listen i need both ur help

 **that boleyn girl:** cathy n anna r playing minecraft

 **that boleyn girl:** n those fuckers stole my stuff

 **that boleyn girl:** wht do u say we raid their hses n tnt em??

 **J.S.:** First of all, why would you want to "raid their hses n tnt em"?!

 **J.S.:** Second of all, what's a "minecraft"?

 **that boleyn girl:** omg how old r u???

 **J.S.:** I'm 23.

 **that boleyn girl:** hold on

 **katsitter:** omg cuz no dun tnt their hse

 **katsitter:** where r they going to live aftwards

 **J.S.:** I have a feeling that Anne wants to make them homeless for some reason?

 **that boleyn girl:** back

 **that boleyn girl:** also janey?

 **J.S.:** Yes?

 **that boleyn girl:** im so sorry u ddnt hv a childhood n was forced to grow up

 **katsitter:** wht did u do

 **that boleyn girl:** asked a janey expert

 **that boleyn girl:** turns out she didnt play minecraft at all back when she was a smol janey

 **that boleyn girl:** she has nvr played with legos before too

 **katsitter:** omg rlly :(

 **J.S.:** I know what Legos are.

 **that boleyn girl:** ok how?

 **J.S.:** There's this Lego film on Netflix…

 **that boleyn girl:** kitty its not too late to change gfs

 **that boleyn girl:** theres probs someone out there with better taste than janey

 **J.S.:** Anne?

 **that boleyn girl:**?

 **J.S.:** [fuckyou.jpg]

 **that boleyn girl:** WHO TF TAUGHT U HOW TO FLIP ME OFF???????

 **J.S.:** Do you seriously think that I don't know how to use the middle finger?!

 **J.S.:** I'm just behind modern trends!

 **katsitter:** can i just say tht u radiate so much chaotic energy tht i hv to stan

 **that boleyn girl:** NO KITTY DO NOT ENABLE UR GF

 **that boleyn girl:** WE R TPOSING U WHEN U GET BACK

 **J.S.:** I'll kick your sorry little arse at Monopoly later so fucking hard you wouldn't be able to walk at all.

 **that boleyn girl:** WTF WHO IS THIS IMPOSTER N WHERES THE REAL JANEY????

 **Mentally Dead:** What the hell is going on?

 **that boleyn girl:** KITTY IS WITH A JANEY IMPOSTER

 **that boleyn girl:** BITCH JUST FLIPPED ME OFF

 **Mentally Dead:** Oh damn

 **Mentally Dead:** Anyways Bo, you just got your house demolished by Anna

 **that boleyn girl:** OH CMON WTF

 **that boleyn girl:** THATS IT IMMA FUCKING TNT THEM

 **that boleyn girl:** THEN ILL WIPE THE SMIRK OFF JANEYS SMUG BUT PRETTY FACE AT MONOPOLO LATER

 **katsitter:** monopolo?????

 **that boleyn girl:** JUST U FUCKING WAIT JANEY

 **Mentally Dead:** Oof, Bo just yeeted her phone

 **J.S.:** Had I known Lina's advice would be this effective, I would've shown her the finger months ago!

 **Mentally Dead:** This is exactly why people should listen to me more often

 **Mentally Dead:** People usually expect cousin relationships to be like Bo's and Kat's

 **Mentally Dead:** And then there's you and Bo

 **J.S.:** Wait, what?

 **J.S.:** I'm her cousin?!

 **Mentally Dead:** Second cousin actually

 **J.S.:** Oh, okay.

 **J.S.:** If she was my actual cousin, I would have to start treating her decently and I don't think I ever want to do that.

 **Mentally Dead:** … You do realise that it makes Kat your second cousin too right?

 **Mentally Dead:** Also, second cousins are still your real cousins

 **J.S.:** The Bible doesn't forbid incestuous relations between cousins.

 **J.S.:** Therefore it's not a sin.

 **J.S.:** If anything, having sex outside of marriage is the sin here.

 **Mentally Dead:** Is this your way of telling us to cut down on sex?

 **katsitter:** ngl i need sleep too

 **Mentally Dead:** Wait hold on, so you're trying to tell me that you think homosexuality is a sin but you're okay with cousins dating each other?

 **J.S.:** Why do you sound so surprised?

 **J.S.:** Katherine, what do you think about us being second cousins?

 **katsitter:** as wht ive said before

 **katsitter:** im ok with shagging cousins

 **Mentally Dead:** Yeah but she's asking you if you're okay with dating cousins

 **Mentally Dead:** To which Bo volunteered herself if Kat had to have sex with a cousin

 **katsitter:** well now theres a better option

 **katsitter:** anyways idc if we r cousins or not

 **katsitter:** we probs wont kno tht we r related had it not been for u

 **katsitter:** second cousins arent rlly related anyways

 **Mentally Dead:** Uh no, you're still kind of related

 **J.S.:** Lina, let Katherine finish.

 **Mentally Dead:** Sorry

 **katsitter:** n my therapist told me that i shld focus on my own happiness n not worry abt wht others think

 **Mentally Dead:**...I was half expecting Jane to freak out upon hearing this

 **J.S.:** Are you against our relationship then?

 **Mentally Dead:** Not really, besides it's hard to see you two as cousins

 **Mentally Dead:** And it's your lives, I'm just going to provide support as a friend

 **Mentally Dead:** That being said, this feels anti-climatic…

 **katsitter:** wht were u even expecting istg

 **J.S.:** If it makes you feel better, we can all pretend that we're not related.

 **J.S.:** Like what Katherine just said, we could've lived our lives not knowing that we're second cousins had it not been for you.

 **Mentally Dead:** Are you blaming me?

 **J.S.:** No, just stating facts Lina.

 **J.S.:** I would've still gone ahead pursuing a romantic relationship with Katherine.

 **Mentally Dead:** Anyways it's a bit hard to pretend that you two aren't kind of related… but I have other priorities

 **katsitter:** saving cathy n anna frm cuz?

 **Mentally Dead:** Saving Catherine and Anna from Bo

* * *

**[protect the babies squad]**

_**[4.45 PM]** _

**Mentally Dead:** Hey girls, so something interesting happened in the group without anna n catherine

 **Mentally Dead:** That was Bo by the way, managed to get my phone away from her

 **KweenCleves:** wht happend in the grp?

 **Mentally Dead:** [badassjane.jpg]

 **Regrets &Coffee: **Oh my god.

 **Mentally Dead:** There's also this

 **Mentally Dead:** [anticlimatic.jpg]

 **KweenCleves:** WOW

 **KweenCleves:** i guess tht means kat doesnt hv to shag anne if the shag a cousin or die thing happens

 **that boleyn girl:** u make it sound like sex with me is bad

 **Regrets &Coffee: **To be honest, I never really had much issue with cousin marriages.

 **Regrets &Coffee: **I mean, I get that it's a controversial topic, but I'm more of the opinion that as long they love each other and that they're aware that they might fuck up their biological children's lives, it's okay?

 **Regrets &Coffee: **Is it just me?

 **KweenCleves:** ehhhh i try not to dwell too much on it

 **KweenCleves:** its just like leave em be not like they hv done anything to u

 **that boleyn girl:** produce genetically bad kids tht fuck up some of our llives in the form o genetic diseases

 **that boleyn girl:** also lowkey kinda weird tht ur shagging ur flesh n blood

 **Mentally Dead:** You LITERALLY volunteered yourself back then!

 **that boleyn girl:** only if kitty needs to fuck a cuz!

 **KweenCleves:** ok fine but they r both women so its not like theyll prodice a dna fucked up kid

 **KweenCleves:** n u literally offered urself to be shagged if the shag a cousin or die thing happens

 **that boleyn girl:** did u not see the reluctance in my offer

 **that boleyn girl:** like is it not obvious?

 **Regrets &Coffee: **Understand that sarcasm is much harder to detect over texts.

 **Mentally Dead:** ^

 **Regrets &Coffee: **Hold on, isn't Culpeper related to Howard?

 **that boleyn girl:** well yea… not sure how but thts what we were told???

 **Regrets &Coffee: **Anyways cousin marriages are a thing between royals, take Queen Victoria for one.

 **Regrets &Coffee: **Also, offsprings resulting from second cousin marriages doesn't significantly increase the chances of them having genetic defects.

 **that boleyn girl:** u RLLY support cousin marriages huh

 **that boleyn girl:** just like how ur a protestor supporter in your previous life

 **KweenCleves:** being a protestor is better than being a reguklar criminal

 **Regrets &Coffee:** It's Protestant, not protestor although I do protest against some things...

 **Mentally Dead:** Catherine's view aside, Jane also used the Bible against any possible opposition

 **Mentally Dead:** I fear that she's on her way to become the next JD

 **that boleyn girl:** is it too late to ask kitty to buy her a trenchaost

 **Regrets &Coffee: **Next you're going to suggest getting her a gun.

 **that boleyn girl:** nah we hv the nerf guns at hm

 **KweenCleves:** can we not enable kats gf to be a sociopath

 **Mentally Dead:** I don't think she'll become a sociopath

 **Mentally Dead:** I'm actually really glad that she behaves more like how people usually behave

 **that boleyn girl:** i thot u like her polite n kind

 **Mentally Dead:** Doesn't she feel like a robot to you previously?

 **Regrets &Coffee: **If you mean suppressing her emotions to please the rest, then yes.

 **KweenCleves:** but shes better now i hope

 **KweenCleves:** kats been doing better

 **KweenCleves:** dun tell me her fake it till she makes it rlly worked

 **Mentally Dead:** I suspect that by treating her like any normal person and allowing her to explore her issues without worrying about us judging her helped as she's able to confront them instead of running away

 **Mentally Dead:** With the addition of therapy, it makes sense that Kat's been doing better

 **that boleyn girl:** yea but its not like we went up to her n asked hows her scar or hows it going with coping rape

 **Regrets &Coffee: **I think the second question should be left to the actual professional.

 **Regrets &Coffee: **Also Boleyn, did you know that the therapist Seymour's seeing is the same one as Howard's?

 **that boleyn girl:** uh duh i gave u the exact card

 **Mentally Dead:** Kat's therapist is Elizabeth Blount right?

 **that boleyn girl:** do i look like i care abt the mental bitchs name

 **Regrets &Coffee: **Wait, isn't that the name of that one student Henry cheated on while dating Aragón?

 **that boleyn girl:** again do i look like i care???

 **KweenCleves:** wtf show her some respect

 **KweenCleves:** how wld u like it if catalina becomes a therapist n someone insults her

 **that boleyn girl:** gurl thts cats kink

 **Regrets &Coffee: **What the hell?!

 **Mentally Dead:** Also, we still haven't talked about how you sold us out to Jane

 **that boleyn girl:** she didnt need to kno tht i ride her hard

 **KweenCleves:** u kno i kinda expected it to be the other way bc boob dancing???

 **that boleyn girl:** oh pls those duckies can still dance even as shes bottoming

 **Regrets &Coffee: **Ignoring that horrifying mental description.

 **Regrets &Coffee: **Howard said that it was considered vanilla for you two.

 **that boleyn girl:** mmhm

 **Regrets &Coffee: **You had a fucking whip.

 **KweenCleves:** n candles

 **KweenCleves:** waittttt catalinas into waxplay???

 **Regrets &Coffee: **I think she's a masochist when they engage in BDSM.

 **Mentally Dead:** Can we stop talking about our sex life?!

 **Mentally Dead:** I don't go around talking about how you like brushing hands with Anna because it's the Victorian version of sex!

 **that boleyn girl:** ew stick to normal stuff like us

 **KweenCleves:** cathys hands are soft af

 **KweenCleves:** n the way she touches my cheek

 **KweenCleves:** how she traces the lines on my palms

 **KweenCleves:** the gentle knuckle carress

 **that boleyn girl:** EW STOP

 **that boleyn girl:** BEFORE I TNT UR HSE

 **Regrets &Coffee: **LIKE THAT STOPPED YOU FROM ACTUALLY DETONATING THE EXPLOSIVES!

 **KweenCleves:** wtffffffff fuck u roomie

 **Mentally Dead:** Just restart in another world…?

* * *

**[London Seymours W/O Tommy]**

_**[6.15 PM]** _

**DorothyofOz:** I need to tell everyone something.

 **J.S.:** What is it?

 **DorothyofOz:** I'm pregnant.

 **LongJohnSilvers:** What?!

 **H.S.:** Who's the father?!

 **J.S.:** John, Henry, calm down.

 **J.S.:** It's literally impossible for Dorothy to have been impregnated by someone because she's for some reason too overly attached with me to even have a one night stand.

 **DorothyofOz:** I could've been raped for all you know.

 **J.S.:** If that actually happened, I would be hearing this from John privately.

 **J.S.:** And chances are that you wouldn't behave in such a flippant manner.

 **H.S.:** I told you she wouldn't fall for it.

 **LongJohnSilvers:** You put too much faith in Dorothy.

 **DorothyofOz:** If anyone comes close to me, I'll slice their little friend off.

 **LongJohnSilvers:** With what?

 **DorothyofOz:** Are you not aware of Jane's letter opener collection?

 **H.S.:** She has a what?!

 **J.S.:** I collect letter openers, it's very satisfying to open letters.

 **DorothyofOz:** Some look fancy too.

 **LongJohnSilvers:** How fancy?

 **DorothyofOz:** [fancyaf.jpg]

 **J.S.:** Wait, how did you get that?

 **LongJohnSilvers:** That's the exact same one used on Ms Howard.

 **J.S.:** I mean… I gave one of them to Katherine as a gift.

 **H.S.:** She likes collecting letter openers too?

 **J.S.:** No, it was for Valentine's.

 **H.S.:** That's a sweet gesture!

 **J.S.:** Until you discover that it's used to slit her throat.

 **H.S.:** What?!

 **LongJohnSilvers:** Long story, anyways I'm pretty sure I returned it to her…

 **DorothyofOz:** Is that even allowed?

 **DorothyofOz:** Shouldn't it be kept as evidence?

 **LongJohnSilvers:** Let's not get into that shall we?

 **DorothyofOz:** HOLY SHIT YOU STOLE IT.

 **H.S.:** OUR BROTHER IS A THIEF.

 **LongJohnSilvers:** FUCK YOU BOTH.

 **DorothyofOz:** WHATEVER HAPPENED TO NOT SWEARING?!

 **J.S.:** Oh by the way, did you know that Anne and Katherine are our second cousins?

 **DorothyofOz:** Who's Anne?

 **LongJohnSilvers:** You call her the "crazy bitch".

 **DorothyofOz:** Oh, her!

 **DorothyofOz:** Wait, she's my cousin?!

 **LongJohnSilvers:** You should've known the moment you found out that Ms Howard was related to us!

 **DorothyofOz:** I was hoping that "Ms Boleyn" was the Spanish bitch!

 **LongJohnSilvers:** Dorothy, her surname doesn't sound Spanish at all!

 **H.S.:** Are you being racist now John?

 **LongJohnSilvers:** NO!

 **DorothyofOz:** At least I didn't assume that it was the jock!

 **H.S.:** Dorothy, shush!

 **DorothyofOz:** SHE'S FUCKING BLACK HOW CAN SHE BE RELATED TO US?!

 **LongJohnSilvers:** Stop being racist! Have you not heard of globalisation?!

 **J.S.:** John has a point, just because Anna's not an Aryan doesn't mean that she doesn't have German blood.

 **DorothyofOz:** Wait, the jock's German?

 **LongJohnSilvers:** What's an Aryan?

 **J.S.:** Anyways, I'll take it that all of you know then.

 **LongJohnSilvers:** Jane, what's an Aryan?

 **H.S.:** Just so you know, we just want you to be happy and if it means dating your cousin, then so be it.

 **H.S.:** There are worse cousins out there that you can date after all...

 **DorothyofOz:** That's true.

 **DorothyofOz:** I mean, not like you two can produce a genetically-fucked up baby right?

 **LongJohnSilvers:** The main point is that all three of us will support your relationship with Ms Howard.

 **DorothyofOz:** But if you want some drama, you can come out to our parents!

 **H.S.:** Jane, I know it's tempting but please don't give Mum a heart attack.

 **H.S.:** Also, Dorothy wants to spite her for some reason.

 **J.S.:** Thank you for your support, Katherine is rather surprised that the three of you are so calm about it.

 **H.S.:** Relationships between cousins aren't mentioned in the Bible.

 **DorothyofOz:** And cousin marriages are legal here!

 **DorothyofOz:** Oh by the way John, wouldn't it be funny if smarmy guy's also our cousin?

 **LongJohnSilvers:** … Do you have something against our partners?

 **LongJohnSilvers:** Also Jane, I think you used "Aryan" wrongly.

 **H.S.:** The ship has sailed John, move on.

 **LongJohnSilvers:** T_T

* * *

"Surprise!" Jane was startled as she unlocked the door, streamers bursting out from party poppers the moment she stepped inside her house. She had a feeling that her roommates were planning a surprise birthday party for her, but she didn't expect three of her siblings to be present. She glanced at Katherine, who gave her an indulgent smile and pushed her into the living room where the rest were waiting. "Happy birthday!"

"Oh heavens… all of you really didn't have to…" Jane said, brushing a tear away from her eye. She never had anyone plan a birthday party for her before, and she felt remembered on that day. Jane glanced at Catalina and Catherine, who shrugged back with knowing smiles on their faces. "... Thank you. This is the first time anyone held a birthday party for me."

"We got you presents too! They're all appropriate so don't worry 'bout receiving a dildo or handcuffs." Anne declared, earning herself glares from Dorothy and Catalina. Henry simply looked perplexed as Anna started cheering her friend on, while John sighed deeply at the result. Katherine gently pushed Jane closer towards them, whispering that it was alright for her to approach them. "Today fucking rules!"

"Bitch, you literally did _nothing_ to help out." Dorothy scowled, all Anne did was to make a mess of the kitchen, and not the kind of mess she was used to. Catalina's face was flushed a bright red, Dorothy had yelled at them sometime in the early afternoon about their sexual activities conducted in the kitchen. Catherine and Anna chuckled, while the two brothers had confused expressions on their faces. "Anyways Jane, we made your favourite food! Or at least what we _think_ are your favourites."

"I really appreciate it Dorothy, thank you. That includes everyone, I truly appreciate it."

"If anything, thank these three for making your party a reality." Anna clapped a hand on Catherine's shoulder, who winced at the stinging pain. Jane blinked, glancing at Catalina and Catherine. She didn't know who was the third person, until Katherine lightly tapped on her shoulder. Jane broke into a smile, that made sense as compared to who she thought of. "Even better, Cathy didn't attempt to kiss Leafy all day!"

"Your… cactus has a party hat." Henry muttered, he felt that the women's fascination with the cactus was strange, even more so when he heard that Catherine had previously attempted to kiss it in the past. John nodded, holding Edward out and placing a party hat on top of his hood. "... John?"

"If the plant gets a party hat, so does the doctor."

"... Dear lord, how much have I missed out on?" Henry shook his head as the rest started to prepare dinner, with Katherine gesturing for him to just roll with it. Jane laughed gently, her third oldest brother had always been easily confused even when she was just a child. "So uh… Jane. It's… nice to see you again."

"Likewise, how is your business faring?"

"It's good. Uh… I don't suppose I've ever mentioned that I'm married?"

"You are? Do the rest know about it?" Henry shook his head, he wasn't sure why he didn't inform his family about his marriage. He never brought his wife back to Salisbury, then again he didn't want her to deal with his large family. "I see, I'm surprised Dorothy hasn't met them during Christmas."

"I don't really want her to deal with a huge family, it can be overwhelming at times." Henry replied, pushing up his glasses. Jane nodded in understanding, she wouldn't want to bring Katherine to meet her family if she ever had to cross that bridge. "Perhaps we could have dinner together? I think you'll get along well with Barbara."

"Barbara? That's _such_ a bitchy name." Anne interjected, openly inserting herself into the conversation. Jane sighed, hoping that the History major wouldn't somehow start an argument on her birthday. "Don't look at me like that Janey, you're thinking of it too."

"Again, you should have some tact."

"Look, Kitty once said something really accurate in the Holbein group."

"And that is?"

"Us Boleyns are as subtle as a brick thrown at a window in the middle of the night."

"You're that 'crazy bitch' Dorothy speaks of?" Henry asked, examining Anne from head to toe. He really should've paid more attention to who was who, but he was more focused on spending the whole day avoiding a disaster. Anne nodded, her brown eyes twinkling with interest while Jane hoped that her roommate wouldn't do anything normal people wouldn't do. "Is Mary Boleyn your sister perhaps?"

"Oof, don't tell me she tried to seduce you in exchange for some deal, that's a classic Mary act."

"Oh no, she tried that on my wife. It was hilarious, there's actually a recording of it." Both Anne's and Jane's jaws hung open, unable to believe what they had just heard. This was especially shocking for Anne as she had always thought her sister was straight as a rod, unless it was just one of her ways to manipulate people. "I could send it to you, if you like."

" _Fuck yes_."

"Good for you Anne, now you can blackmail your sister."

* * *

"I… I don't get it, shouldn't you be in jail? Why are you rolling the dice?" John asked as Anne was shaking two dice in her hand before releasing them, giving her an eight. He was playing Monopoly with everyone except Henry, who offered to be the mediator in case either Anne or Anna was about to flip the board. "What the heck? This is cheating. Henry, tell Ms Boleyn that she's cheating."

"I want to see where this goes." Henry replied, interested in how Anne's suggestion of GTA Monopoly would play out. The concept intrigued him, even though it was glaringly obvious how the game would turn out. Catalina and Catherine had long resigned themselves to fate, while Anna and Katherine were sincerely hoping that the player they made a bet on would win.

"It's called GTA Monopoly for a good reason." Anne replied as she landed on an unowned property, while looking at the amount of cash she had. "Okay guys, let's fucking bid for this. I'm bidding a dollar."

"50." Dorothy immediately said, glaring at Anne. Anne shrugged and raised her bid to 51 dollars, hoping that Dorothy didn't remember that Anne was almost bankrupt. "100!"

"200!" Anna yelled, realising that the property being auctioned would benefit her greatly. Dorothy scowled as she raised her bid to 250 dollars, with Anne promptly raising her bid to 251 dollars. "300!"

"3000!" Dorothy countered, smirking as no one dared to outbid her. Henry shook his head as he counted to three, choosing to hold his tongue and not point out that Anne was purposely trying to get her to spend a lot of money for a good reason. "Ha! In your face bitch!"

"Lord in Heaven, I know we haven't been in touch lately, but please forgive my sister's constant use of profanity." Jane said calmly as she rolled the dice and moved forward by eleven spaces, handing 500 dollars to Catalina, who was the banker for that round. "Whose turn is it?"

"Me!" Katherine cheerily rolled the dice, landing on a chance space. She drew a chance card, gleefully choosing to send Anne to jail. "Anne, I'm sending you to jail!"

"What?!" John frowned, he was expecting a quiet and fairly competitive round of Monopoly, not players blatantly cheating. Catherine and Catalina shared the same sentiment, it reminded them of the card game their four roommates played a while back. "How dare you send me to jail when I haven't even fucking rolled my way outta jail!"

"Okay then, bear in mind that you have to roll a nine or higher to avoid jail time." Anne grumbled, shaking the dice and throwing it out onto the board. Katherine cheerfully placed Anne's piece onto the jail space, while her cousin cursed her luck. "See, jail."

"Fuck this game!"

"Ms Howard, _you're_ supposed to go to jail and not Ms Boleyn."

"Yeah, but I pinned the crime on her and Anne's unable to roll her way out of it." Katherine shrugged, confusing John. He stared at the board, suddenly reminded of Dungeons and Dragons instead of Monopoly. Catherine rolled the dice and landed on Katherine's property, immediately paying her 1000 dollars in order to buy the property from her. "Lin-Lin, it's your turn!"

"At first I was planning to play it fair, but fuck it. I'm stealing 1500 dollars from the damn bank." Catalina commented, taking out 1500 dollars from the bank. Her roommates gasped at Catalina's boldness, while the off-duty policeman groaned into his money. Dorothy turned to Henry, who was amused at the sight. Catalina rolled the dice, landing on the GO space. "Ooh, more money for me."

"My turn!" Anna rolled the dice and sulkily moved her piece to the jail square, a smirk forming as she cheated. "I use POC treatment!"

"What… What the heck is that?"

"It's when a POC justly highlights how they're jailed for something they didn't do."

"But… aren't you just visiting Ms Boleyn?" Anna blinked, staring at the board blankly before staring back at John. "Don't you know that you can only be in jail if the card says so?"

"Wait, _what_?! You mean my parents lied to me?!"

"I know that your friends are cheating, but I have to say, this is very amusing." Henry leant down and whispered to Jane, who nodded in response. There was something about the lack of order that made her feel free, and it thrilled her. After Anna made her piece do a victory dance to spite Anne, it was Dorothy's turn. She rolled a six, and landed on Anne's sole property. After throwing 500 dollars at Anne, she flicked the mini house away and placed one of her own. Anne growled, desperately shaking the dice before throwing them. She let out a whoop as it landed on a double eight, with Katherine begging her cousin for mercy. "What's going on?"

"HA! I BREAK OUT OF JAIL AND START A MONOPOLY FINANCIAL CRISIS!"

"What the heck does _that_ mean?!"

"It means we now have to pay double." Katherine explained, eliciting groans from the other players. Anne moved her piece by eight spaces, landing on a chance square. She drew a card, and cheered a second time as she revealed her hand. "Oh c'mon! How the fuck did you manage to draw a get out of jail card?!"

"Isn't that a good thing for her Katherine?"

"THE JAIL'S MY PROPERTY NOW BITCHES!"

"Are you kidding me?! If that has to belong to anyone, that belongs to _me_!" John, fed up with the cheating, finally caved in and went along with the cheating unfolding before his eyes. Henry and Jane couldn't help cracking smiles of their own as they saw their serious brother breaking down before them. "Jails are basically police properties! And I'm a motherfucking _cop_!"

"Holy shit, John swore in real life." Dorothy whispered as he argued with Anne over who should own the jail square. Catalina facepalmed, wondering to herself why did she ever fall in love with Anne. Anna simply recorded the argument, while Catherine had entered and returned from the kitchen to retrieve a tub of Haägen-Dazs ice cream as well a few spoons. She then offered a spoon to Katherine, who happily accepted and shared the ice cream with Catherine while they watched John and Anne argue. "This is one hell of a birthday party."

"Stick around London and you'll Seymour of these."

"Oh c'mon Jane, you were doing so damn well too!"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> 1\. Whose opinion towards romantic/sexual cousin relationships do you agree with and why? Is there really a correct opinion in such a controversial topic? Explain.
> 
> 2\. What issues does the GTA Monopoly raise and how can they be linked back to the issues faced in reality?


	20. Chapter 20

"Remind me again why are we going to watch a stupid performance?" Anne complained as she made her way towards the school's theatre building, her friends with her. In actual fact, they were on their way to watch the performances of the Theatre majors in their first year. Katherine had invited all five of them to the showcase, and they agreed since they didn't have classes for the day.

"Katherine invited us to watch her performance and was excited about it?"

"Urgh, it's a free day for me. I was planning to sleep the whole day away."

"Mood." Catherine agreed, letting out a yawn as she swayed from side to side, with Anna there to help her to walk straight. Catalina checked the time on her phone, they still had an hour before the showcase started. "That being said, I'm going to miss seeing Seymour and Aragón around in school."

"Aw, that's sweet. I think we'll miss seeing you haunting the library." Catalina quipped, with Catherine good-naturedly rolling her eyes. Anna and Jane chuckled, while Anne still complained about how her whole day was wasted on the showcase. Jane sighed, she was expecting Anne to be more interested in her cousin's performance. Her phone vibrated, a message coming in for Jane.

**[katsitter]**

_**[12.34 PM]** _

**katsitter:** hi janeeee

 **katsitter:** ur all on ur way here???

 **J.S.:** Yep, Anne's complaining about it.

 **katsitter:** lmao yea anna dmed me abt it

 **katsitter:** im sooooo nervous

 **katsitter:** like i actually relate to my characters but like

 **katsitter:** im rlly scared to fuck up the playwrights script

 **katsitter:** did u kno tht we took the last yrs second yr english majors projects for the showcase?

 **katsitter:** we r actually performing seniors we probs kno works

 **J.S.:** Oh, that's rather impressive!

 **katsitter:** more like nervewracking >_<

 **katsitter:** can u motivate me

 **J.S.:** How?

 **katsitter:** hmmmmmmmmmmmm

 **katsitter:** idk maybe a kiss or smth

 **katsitter:** or ur ice cream

 **J.S.:** I'll kiss you once the showcase is over.

 **katsitter:** did u srsly put ice cream over me

 **J.S.:** I want to share my ice cream with you, not give everything to you.

 **katsitter:** awwwww

 **katsitter:** btw u can shut cuz up by shoving soap bars into her mouth

 **katsitter:** linlin did it once n it was so funny

 **J.S.:** There aren't any soap bars present, but I'll make her drink a cup of hand soap later.

 **katsitter:** omg no

 **katsitter:** how abt i show u my costume for ltr?

 **katsitter:** just dun kill our cuz

 **J.S.:** I don't recognise her as my cousin.

 **J.S.:** And yes, I would like to see your costume!

 **J.S.:** What are you playing as anyways?

 **katsitter:** [mebutsluttier.jpg]

 **J.S.:** Shfwigfkwfbwuiawau

"Jane, what the hell?! Did you just yeet your phone at Catalina?!" Anna exclaimed as Jane tossed her phone onto Catalina's face, a loud smack heard by all five of them. Jane had a furious blush present on her face, a result after seeing the photo Katherine had sent her. She was used to her girlfriend wearing revealing clothes as well as Anne strutting around the house in her birthday suit after a shower (something Jane wished she could forget), but Katherine's costume was even more revealing that she had predicted. "What's wrong? Your face is all red!"

"I-I'm fine… Lina, do you mind returning my phone?" Jane mumbled, covering her face with a hand while her other was extended in Catalina's direction, who was about to return the phone to its owner but decided not to at the last minute. She held the phone high above her head as Jane tried to jump and reach her phone, but failed miserably. "Lina! Give me back my phone!"

"This is the first time I'm so glad that you're shorter than us." Catalina remarked, her eyes widening as she saw the picture Katherine had sent. Anna and Anne, interested in the reaction shown, took a glimpse at what their friend saw and gaped. Katherine was dressed in one of the many lacy black bras she owned, which was barely covered by a bright pink denim jacket. She was dressed in the shortest and tightest pair of shorts they had ever seen, which explained Jane's reaction. "So… basically Jane's fucked?"

"Oh totes, hell I'm loving this look on Kitty and would probs go for her if it weren't for you and she's not my cousin."

"... I know she had long legs, but _damn_." Catherine was the only one who didn't bother to reach for the phone, having collapsed onto the floor and went to sleep. "Mein gott, were her legs always that firm?"

"S-Stop lusting after my girlfriend and lust after your own!"

* * *

Katherine tightened her grip on her denim jacket, uncomfortable with her costume. It was the first time she was so exposed in a public setting, and she wasn't sure how this was going to help her reputation as the campus slut. She shook her head, telling herself that her identity wasn't defined by her reputation in school. Katherine was going to play Asmodia, she wasn't going up on stage to perform her life to the audience, it was Asmodia's. She nearly screamed as someone tapped her shoulder from behind, startling the other person.

"Katherine, calm down! It's just me!" A woman in Katherine's class huffed, taken aback by the reaction her classmate gave. She was playing the protagonist of the performance that her class was going to perform in less than an hour, and wanted to check in all of her fellow performers before they were called on stage. "Sheesh, did you have to scream your bloody head off?"

"Joan, you shouldn't sneak up on me!" Katherine retorted, crossing her arms and indirectly placing emphasis on her large chest. Joan briefly sneaked a glance at her classmate's assets before looking at her classmate's pink eyes, grumbling about something Katherine couldn't make out. "What did you just say Joan?"

"Hm? Nothing. Anyways, have you seen the rest? Especially Lucy and Levi."

"... You mean Margaret and Peter?"

"I guess?! I don't _actually_ know most of our classmates' names!" Joan shrugged, she couldn't be bothered to remember her classmates' names. The only reason why she remembered Katherine's was because she stood out, thanks to her dyed hair and unnatural pink eyes. Katherine wondered why Joan was so agitated, she recalled her to be a fairly mild woman during their rehearsals. "So do you know where they are?"

"Margaret's with the stage crew regarding the lighting, I'm not sure about Peter. You should ask someone else about it." Joan grumbled, leaving Katherine alone in the changing room. Katherine feared that Joan's foul mood would bring their performance down, she didn't want to disappoint her friends. She picked up her script, which she left on the table and ran through her lines once more. Thanks to Dorothy, she was now more confident with her performance, even though she was still worried about her character's monologue. ' _I need to take care to not break into song… I didn't know she's such a huge fan of the musical…'_

"Katherine! Is Joan here?" A lanky woman stumbled into the changing room, her hair in a mess from unknown reasons. Katherine shook her head, informing her classmate that she had just missed Joan. "Oh thank god, she's throwing a fucking tantrum and I'm trying to hide from her."

"Margaret, what happened?"

"She thinks that I'm the one who stole her rosary!"

"What's a rosary?"

"You know the necklaces with the cross that devout people sometimes wear around their neck? That, but the string part's covered with beads."

"Oh! That's a rosary? I don't recall Jane's cross looking like that… actually it looks more like jewellery…" Katherine remarked, recalling Jane's necklace as a simple gold necklace with a crucifix hanging on it. Margaret immediately grabbed a low cut yellow dress with silver trimmings from the clothing rack before locking herself inside the actual changing room. "Did you steal her cross then?"

"No! That's Peter! You can go ask Bridget, she'll tell you that she saw Peter taking that damn rosary! Bloody twat, he knows damn well that Joan's religious as fuck!" Margaret retorted, with Katherine making a noise to acknowledge her classmate's rebuke. Her phone vibrated furiously, a slew of messages from her cousin appearing on her device.

**[that boleyn girl]**

_**[1.09 PM]** _

**that boleyn girl:** damn gurl u kno how to send a sexy pic

 **katsitter:** wtf did i do now

 **that boleyn girl:** overload poor janeys head

 **that boleyn girl:** anyways some loser rammed us n he dropped a fancy cross necklace cat n janey has

 **that boleyn girl:** [nicebeadslol.jpg]

 **katsitter:** does he hv light brown hair super tall n kinda like a jock but u kno leaner?

 **that boleyn girl:** u psychic???

 **katsitter:** omg gimme tht

 **katsitter:** tht belongs to one of my classmates

 **that boleyn girl:** legit??

 **katsitter:** YES CUZ IM SRS SOMEONES GONNA DIE IF U DUN RETURN IT

 **that boleyn girl:** ok ok chill ill return it

 **that boleyn girl:** whts her name

 **katsitter:** joan astley i think??

 **that boleyn girl:** holy shit janey just said tht she kno her

 **that boleyn girl:** anyways i gave tht thing to janey

 **that boleyn girl:** so hows the prep work going?

 **katsitter:** joans searching for tht cross

 **katsitter:** she falsely accused someone else n tht someone is now hiding with me

 **katsitter:** n peters a prick

 **that boleyn girl:** mmhm

 **that boleyn girl:** anyways we r seated pretty front so prepare for embarrassment

 **katsitter:** omggggg

 **that boleyn girl:** just rmb to be gay n out drama ur class

 **katsitter:** aw thts the most nicest thing u ever said to me ever since mum n dad got arrested :D

"Katherine! Have you seen Joan- oh dear lord you're still wearing that?!" Jane immediately covered her eyes upon seeing Katherine dressed in her costume. Katherine giggled, forgetting that she was initially uncomfortable with her character's clothes. "Her rosary's with me, and Anne said that she's going on a ramp-"

"MARGARET FUCKING WYATT! WHERE THE FUCK DID YOU HIDE MY ROSARY?!" Joan roared, storming into the changing room where Katherine and Jane were. Joan immediately flinched, her tone softening upon seeing her senior. "Ahem. Jane, you're not supposed to be in here."

"Joan, I believe this is yours?" Jane held up Joan's rosary, instantly calming her down. She grabbed the rosary from Jane's hand and clutched it tightly as though it would slip away from her a second time. "A man had an incident with Anne and he dropped it."

"I see…" Joan nodded thoughtfully, planning to murder Peter after the showcase was over, She soon snapped out from her thoughts, frowning with disapproval at Jane. "You really shouldn't be here Jane."

"I know, I just wanted to encourage Katherine before going back to my seat." Jane said, tenderly pressing her lips against Katherine's cheek before disappearing from the changing room. Joan stared openly at her classmate, in awe at how romantic Jane was despite the presence of a third wheel. Katherine had a silly smile on her face as she pressed a hand to her cheek, sighing dreamily at the kiss. The actual changing room's door creaked open, revealing a frightened Margaret.

"A-Am I safe now?"

* * *

"I can't believe this was chosen." Catherine groaned into her hands as they watched the performance Katherine was involved in. Anna quirked an eyebrow, confused by her girlfriend's comment.

"What do you mean Cathy?"

"I wrote this for my end of the year project, I can't believe the Theatre department got students to perform this shitshow."

"Whoa, that's so fucking rad. It must be a good one in order for the Theatre department to choose that for a performance." Anna replied, gently squeezing Catherine's hand to reassure her. "Don't worry Cathy, it's definitely something worth watching."

Catherine sighed, she really wasn't expecting to see her project being brought to life by a class of Theatre majors in their first year. Even worse was that Katherine was playing as Asmodia, a character who was basically the personification of raw sexuality but was also a victim of child sexual abuse, something that Catherine based off the depiction of Henry VIII's fifth wife in the musical.

"Anne, what do you think about it?" Jane whispered to Anne, who was exceptionally focused on the performance. Jane felt bad that she would be distracting Anne, but she wanted to hear about her friends' opinions and she couldn't ask Catalina, who was occupied with recording the whole performance.

"It's strange how we're all so chill 'bout you and Kitty dating even after we found out that we're second cousins. Like, people are all 'ew all incest is gross' when they hear of cousins dating but we're just… we just accepted you two like it was nothing and are more concerned about both of your mental health than the societal repercussions which would probably negatively affect mental health when others find out that you're in an incestual relationship with Kitty."

"... I meant the performance, but thank you for worrying about us?"

"Oh this? Uh… it feels like the playwright wrote about how some random girl explores the seven deadly sins via personification and went with the Binsfeld's Classification of Demons when naming the characters. I mean, Kitty's character is the representation of lust, which is the demon Asmodeus but since the character's a female, it's an Asmodia. Then there's Levi who's super jel towards the protagonist which is basically Leviathan y'know?"

"I didn't notice that, do you think that the seven personified sins are actual people that the girl meets in her life or are they just conjured up by her?"

"Shh." Catalina shushed the two women, her attention focused on recording every second of the performance. Jane and Anne nodded, immediately shutting up. The character played by Joan delivered heartwarming speeches to three of the sins, with the audience expressing their ability to relate to the character's situation. Then Katherine appeared on stage, and received a harsh lecture about how her loose morals would send her to hell.

"Hell?! You don't know me! Who are you to condemn me to hell? Sure, I'm a ten among all of these threes! Yes, I've made the boys go wild even when I was a child! And all they wanna do back then was to…" Katherine blew an insincere kiss to Joan, smiling wryly at the audience before rolling her head back to face Joan. "Y'know something? There was this guy, he was my babysitter. He taught me what true love was like back when I was nine, and he was 29 at that time so I thought 'hey he's an adult so I can trust him'. And! And when your grandmother's caretaker felt that you were suited to be his personal assistant, you don't just say no because it means you're wanted right? You don't really question it when you- oh I don't know, get to use his favourite pen and 'accidentally' spill white ink all over the table, do you?!"

"... Why of all roles, it had to be the one Howard could relate to?" Catherine lamented writing such a monologue for Asmodia, she didn't realise that there were women in real life that went through the same trauma Asmodia did when she wrote the play, and that one such woman was the playwright's roommate and fellow tattoo buddy.

"I just wanted them to tell me what they wanted, they- they didn't even have to plead y'know? I could feel the chemistry back then with them, it was like I understood them, and they did too! I was taught that love pleases me, squeezes me, birds and the bees me. Is that wrong?! I just wanted them to run their fingers through my hair as they tell me that I'm the fairest in the land, I didn't _ask_ for my lips to be bitten or for them to yank on my bloody hair! Who are you to damn me, when you don't even know me, when all I am to you is just some cheap slut attracting some boy that _you_ just so happen to like! What right do you have to lecture me, you don't get to call me a woman of loose morals when _you_ , you don't even have any empathy to spare!"

"Katherine's really good at acting, even though it's as though she's being herself on stage."

"One thing I learnt from the net is that if you can make the character you play as though it's your true self, you're either a damn good actor, or suffering from identity disorder."

"Bo, that's not how multiple personality disorder works." Catalina hissed, while Katherine ran off the stage and behind the curtains while Joan stared in the direction Asmodia went. Joan then went on to reflect if she truly had any right to lecture the sinners in the story, that maybe viewing herself as being holier than thou above others was wrong, and that made _her_ the real sinner. "Damn, the person who wrote this play is a fucking genius."

"... Or super delirious from not sleeping for a week as well as buckets of coffee." Catherine whispered, only for Anna to hear. Her girlfriend sighed as she started to rub Catherine's hand in a circular motion with her thumb, comforting her. "... Ich liebe dich."

"Aw Cathy, I love you too."

* * *

"Cathy! There you are!" Katherine called out as she broke into a brisk walk towards her friends, with Catherine still regretting writing that play. "Did you like it? Did I do Asmodia justice? Did we do your play justice? Oh my god, you have _no_ idea how much everyone loved your play when we received the script!"

"Oh uh… I'm honoured and also very horrified that it was performed on stage."

"Eeeeeeeeee! You have no idea how hard it was to keep it a secret from you!"

"Wait, _she_ wrote it?!" Anne asked in disbelief, the woman in question nodding stiffly. Anne whistled, she now saw Catherine in a new light, and respected her more for writing a play in her second year. Jane clapped joyfully upon hearing the news, while Catalina muttered about how she had to force Catherine to sleep after the play was submitted. "Damn Catherine, no wonder you're an English major."

"Did you actually doubt her Anne? You should know that the quality of her fanfiction is superb!"

"Whoa back up, you've read my fanfiction?!" Jane nodded, she had come across it while cleaning Catherine's room, and it wasn't the first time the owner had left her laptop switched on. Catherine was mortified, and hoped that Jane hadn't come across the smut work featuring her with Anne. "Oh by the way, I really liked how you used the detail about Queen Boleyn ripping the locket Henry VIII gave to the then lady-in-waiting Seymour which led to them attempting to out-dominate each other in bed!"

"Oh my god she actually read it." Catherine whimpered, hiding behind her girlfriend while Anna herself chuckled. Anne's brown eyes sparkled with interest upon hearing the historical detail, leading her to beg Catherine for permission to read that particular work. "No Boleyn, I'm too embarrassed to show that to anyone."

"You say that, but you asked me for advice regarding that smut between me und Kat-"

"LIEBLING, NOT IN FRONT OF HOWARD!"

"... It was totally consensual and the me in that fic always checked in with you Kat."

"Oh, I heard of this kind of adult fiction! It's like… fluff meets non-kinky porn and they have a super cute baby!" Katherine replied, not particularly minding the fact that she was used as material for an adult story since she trusted Catherine enough. She shivered, remembering that she was still in her costume. Jane noticed, and removed her cardigan then tried draping it on Katherine's shoulders. The latter chuckled as Jane was straining to reach her shoulders, eventually throwing it onto her face. "Thanks Jane! By the way, did you like the showcase? I know it was long considering that we had three classes today."

"I did, the way you portrayed Asmodia… I could sense the raw emotion she had in dialogue, that even as Eve condemned her for her sexual history, all she wants is the pure love Eve took for granted. Her friendship with Levi is a nod to her jealousy in that scene if I'm not wrong?"

"I'll be sending the video to the group later, so you can analyse your girlfriend's performance to your heart's content later." Catalina commented, with Katherine beaming upon hearing that Catalina had recorded her performance. She had never gotten to see the product, all she saw was snippets of their performances recorded by whoever was free, which was usually no one. "You did great Kat, we're all proud of you."

"Thanks Lin-Lin, it really means a lot.

"Kitty, are you okay though? Asmodia is pretty similar to you, and well… y'know." Anne inquired about her cousin's wellbeing, she knew that it could be mentally taxing for a victim to confront their inner demons all at once. Katherine nodded, revealing that in a way, it was an outlet for her to express her personal thoughts towards her own experiences and that her therapist had informed her that as long as Katherine reminded herself that Asmodia and herself were _similar_ , not the same person, she was allowed to perform as Asmodia. "... Hmm, guess your mental bitch is helping."

"Should I be concerned that you've doubted Ms Blount before?"

"Nah, I doubt all mental bitches."

* * *

Jane hugged Edward while she shared some puns she thought of to Katherine, who awkwardly chuckled while Anne informed her that she didn't need to agree with the puns just because they were dating. Catalina was in the kitchen washing up the dishes while Catherine made frequent trips to the bathroom as a result of the extremely spicy dinner a certain roommate had made. Anna was outside the bathroom, expressing concern for her girlfriend which was met with swearing.

"I don't get it, you have Kitty. Why the hell are you hugging that squishy doctor and not her?" Anne asked, ever since she got together with Catalina, she had a hard time leaving Catalina alone at night as she liked to hug her to sleep. It was often to the point that Anna asked if she could use Anne's bedroom to store some of her belongings back in their previous flat, a request that Anne refused, because ultimately she wanted to be there for Katherine after her nightmares and also Catherine was starting to tease them. "Seriously, you might as well date that thing."

"Edward's not just a thing!"

"It's a thing Kitty bought with my money."

"Why are you still so obsessed over it?" Katherine asked, hugging Jane to prove a point. Anne raised an eyebrow, failing to understand what Katherine was trying to say. Jane also didn't understand too, but didn't mind the hug since her hands were occupied. "Jane's my Edward!"

"Oh fair point, Janey's pretty squishy."

"... I'll consider that as a compliment…?" Jane mumbled, she was still conscious of her weight and while Katherine didn't mind, she wondered if it would be better if she was less squishy as her friends liked to say. "Anyways Anne, you said that you had a game planned for our first game night. Care to share?"

"Not now Janey, you're ruining the fun." Anne sighed dramatically, she had quickly realised that all their girlfriends were considered boring as compared to them. Catherine could be easily convinced by Anna to participate in their activities, and while Jane had a wild side, that only happened when Jane's mood was lower than usual. Catalina was almost impossible to drag into their activities, the reason provided was that the activities were usually illegal. In fact, the only times Catalina did something crazy was when Henry was involved. "Trust me, there's no physical contact."

"Yeah! Don't worry, it's really safe! There's no fire, water, or vacuums involved!" Katherine added, making Jane worry about their usual kind of fun. She had assumed that the card game (which was called 'Suck It!') and GTA Monopoly were the type of fun the three chaotic roommates played, something that she soon realised to be false after hearing how their kind of fun usually caused the destruction of school property.

"I don't want to know how the three of you managed to get a vacuum cleaner involved."

"We tried to suck up the broken vase, but that just punctured the tube thingy and fucked up the machine itself."

"No Anne, the machine broke because you vacuumed the hammer and spanner!" Anne shrugged, she managed to vacuum a few knives before without any problems, she was fairly sure that the spanner and hammer weren't the reason for the machine breaking down. "It's a good thing that we sucked up all the ashes."

"Ashes?! Exactly _what_ kind of a vase did you vacuum?!" Jane had a sinking feeling, but she desperately hoped that Anne would prove her wrong. Unfortunately for her, her assumption was confirmed by both women.

"It was more of an urn than a vase… but like we weren't supposed to be at that funeral so…"

"How did you three even get invited to a funeral you're not supposed to attend?!" Jane's face was paler than ever, she recalled that Katherine had mentioned attending a funeral in mid-April and that it was an interesting experience. Jane realised that this was the exact funeral her girlfriend mentioned, and that her friends trying to have some fun at a serious event was beyond terrifying. "Just… how?"

"To be specific, it wasn't really a funeral. We just call it that because Anne can't pronounce 'cremation' without fucking up the word."

"Yeah so, some bloke thought that I was related to the burnt corpse since we passed by the human fireplace or whatever it's called on our way to the pub. And Anna was like 'yeah she's _totes_ related to the dead one', so I just rolled with it since I was a bit iffy 'bout being sloshed then."

"I thought it was Katherine who didn't like drinking."

"Oh please, she's always sober. Anyways yeah we entered and they started speaking in an Asian language that I _think_ it's Korean? So yeah we started to distance ourselves but they told us that we couldn't leave due to some tradition."

"... How does that link to the vacuum incident?"

"There was a vacuum cleaner nearby and we decided to make ourselves useful by cleaning the whole place, then we made a game over how much stuff we could suck up. And then it went bonkers and went out of our control. While chasing that thing, Kitty was given the vase with the ashes and _then_ , then, the thing broke her lower legs."

"It did not!"

"You got some serious boo-boos though. You wanted to ask Janey if she could kiss 'em better but didn't because you're scared that she's still too depressed to even look at you."

"I said that I was worried that she doesn't want to look at me because I fucked up her life!"

"Same diff! Anyways yeah, because of that, the vase went yeet and was all kersmash y'know? So we panicked and started to suck up the stuff which was broken vase pieces and black stuff that was soft to touch."

"... You _touched_ the ashes of a dead person."

"That was Anna! Back to the main point, the tube thing started to hiss so Anna quickly searched for some tools to fix machines, and produced a spanner and a hammer. Kitty started to bang the thing with the hammer, and remember how the machine's bonkers? Yeeeeeah it sucked up that hammer and then I tried to open it with the spanner buuuuut…"

"Please don't continue, just explain what happened when the actual relatives asked about the urn."

"Oh, I told them that I left it on a table somewhere! They got into an argument when they found out that it wasn't there and apparently it opened up this _really_ huge tin of worms so we just legged it shortly after!" Jane pinched the bridge of her nose, simply hearing the story was enough to make her doubt if she was really related to Anne (and Katherine), and was now concerned that the three of them would turn her house upside down. "Don't worry, Anna washed her hands thoroughly to remove evidence of us being there!"

"Good thing the spycams were down then."

"Spy- you mean the security cameras?"

"I literally just said that." Anne said, confused at Jane's deadpan expression. Katherine nervously chuckled, suddenly acutely aware that what they did was probably illegal even though it was considered fun to them. Until the family started fighting at least. "Okay look, if you wanna blame anyone, it's all on Anna."

"Anne! You can't just blame Anna even though in hindsight it's really her fault!"

"And here I thought you three can't be anymore chaotic." Catalina groaned, drying her hands with her skirt as she narrowed her eyes at the two cousins involved. Katherine tensed up, while Anne ignored her girlfriend's reactions and smiled proudly. "Even at _our_ worst, it's never as bad as vacuuming cremated ashes or setting a building on fire."

"First of all, that was Anna. Second of all, I don't believe for one second that you three aren't as chaotic as us."

"Look, the worst thing we did was Catherine attempting to give Jane a lap dance while drunk but ended up getting fucking huge bruises on both her hips."

"She did _what_?!"

"Oh my god, I kinda wanna see Cathy giving Anna a lap dance now. It's gonna be so lit and hilarious and we probs might use this as blackmail." Katherine commented, a malicious smile forming on her lips as she glanced in the direction of the bathroom where Catherine and Anna were. Anne cheered, she was all for her friends embarrassing themselves as long as she wasn't included. Catalina sighed, regretting the reveal.

"Lina, it was your fault back then."

"How would I know that Catherine's clumsy as fuck? I was young then, cut me some slack."

"It literally happened on the night when you two moved in."

* * *

"Now that Catherine's back, we can finally play the game that will def bring us closer together as girlfriends _and_ friends! This game is simple, we'll split into couples, one half would be A and the other half would be B. So the A peeps will be the one asking questions and the Bs will be answering them."

"That's… that's all? I was expecting something dangerous from you Bo." Catalina remarked, with Jane expressing surprise towards Anne. Catherine groaned, she was still experiencing abdominal pain thanks to the spicy food Catalina had made for dinner. "Okay so… I'm cool with anything."

"Really? Awesome, I'm A then!" The other four women discussed between themselves, eventually Anna and Katherine settled on being As while their girlfriends were on the same side at Catalina. "Great, we're all in teams! So we'll go in turns, like I'll ask a question or give you a situation and the three of you will answer as though your girlfriends just said it!"

"I have to say Boleyn, this might be the one night that won't end in disaster." Catherine commented, offering Anne praise. Jane nodded, while Catalina remained sceptical. Anne grinned, clearly excited to start the game. "Alright, let's start."

"Yup, lemme see… okay, got one. I'm in jail, what would you do? Let's go down the line, starting with my girlfriend!" Catalina frowned, Anne landing herself in prison was a very real possibility. Sighing, she answered the way she would if Anne was sent to prison.

"I'll consider the idea of leaving you there, but eventually bail you out."

"Same here, except I wouldn't hesitate to pay for Anna's bail."

"I don't have a lot of money, so perhaps I will beg John to let Katherine out… or I'll commit a crime and be with her in the same cell!" Catalina gasped, not expecting Jane to actually consider committing a felony just to be with Katherine. Catherine wheezed, choking as she was about to laugh. Anne and Anna groaned as Katherine's pink eyes sparkled with mini hearts in them, reluctantly declaring Jane the winner for that round. "I won? Why?"

"Yeah, why Bo?"

"We're supposed to judge based on the most romantic answer given." Catalina facepalmed, of course the game had to have a twist. She glowered at Anne, who innocently smiled back. The Psychology major knew that she wasn't the most romantic woman around, and Anne knew it well. If anything, Anne probably wanted her to lose just for the sheer hell of it. "Alright ladies, it's my turn! What would you do if we had a karaoke date?"

"Kiss the hell out of Bo." Catalina was satisfied with her answer, it was romantic _and_ it resolved the issue of Anne's singing. Her girlfriend stuck her tongue out, offended that her singing was implied to be terrible. "Don't deny it love, you'll totally be into it."

"Try to sneak in a duet song and pray that my voice doesn't crack?"

"Run to the slushie machine and make a drink that we could share!" Five heads turned to warily look at Jane, who threw up her hands to display her annoyance. "What?! I'm not doing it just for the slushies!"

"Never said you were, but go off I guess." Catherine's shoulders tensed up as their girlfriends discussed who gave the most romantic answer. Had she known that she would be judged based on how romantic her answers were, she would've chosen A. "... So… who's the most romantic?"

"Answer-wise, Catalina. Accounting our personalities, Jane. Personally, you."

"Basically one point for Lin-Lin, one point for Jane! It's okay Cathy, your answers are very sweet!" Katherine smiled, about to start her turn. "I wanna die!"

"What?! No! I'm bringing you to therapy!"

"Howard's a huge mood."

"Let's die together!" Everyone but Katherine stared at Jane with horror in their eyes, while Jane was oblivious to the responses received. Katherine sighed dreamily, which worried the others apart from Jane. "I love you Katherine."

"No. Just… dear god, why the fuck did you think that's romantic?!"

"But Anneeeee, it _is_ romantic!" Katherine pleaded, much to her cousin's dismay. Anna's eyes darted about, staying silent as she coughed to remind everyone what they were doing before the horrifying answer surfaced. "Oh right, I vote for Jane's answer!"

"KITTY, WE'VE TALKED ABOUT THIS! SUICIDE PACTS AREN'T HEALTHY OR ROMANTIC!"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> 1\. What do you think of people playing with religious items for their own entertainment?
> 
> 2\. How superficial is Catherine's play with regards to her portrayal of the characters that are based on the seven sins? Explain.
> 
> 3\. Explain in detail everything wrong about Anne's, Anna's, and Katherine's night out that involved the vacuum.
> 
> 4\. Suicide pacts are seen as a romantic notion in fiction. Explain why does this notion persist and the dangers it presents to audiences.


	21. Chapter 21

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Torturing the readers with my story on Christmas/Christmas Eve? It's more likely than you think.

John regretted holding his wedding in a restaurant in a hotel, specifically at one that was well-known for its quality. Robert chuckled as he squeezed his hand reassuringly, something that didn't help to minimise the embarrassment some of the guests were creating. John wondered if he made the right decision to extend the wedding invitations to his sister's friends, especially Anne and Anna.

Granted, the six women weren't causing any physical destruction. It was merely Anne and Anna bragging about how they met John as well as the activities that led to their meeting. It was one thing if they had bragged about it to the guests Robert had invited, but they were bragging about it to John's guests, which were mainly his colleagues. Thankfully for him, they laughed at the interactions highlighted and even praised them for boldly (and stupidly in John's opinion) attempting to flirt with John despite knowing that he could arrest them any time simply for existing.

At a corner, Catalina was groaning about how her girlfriend was embarrassing the groom while Catherine chuckled, before being reminded that her girlfriend was also embarrassing John. Henry smirked as he witnessed his brother blushing when one of his colleagues recounted to the chaotic duo about the day he was forced to go undercover as a male stripper, to which the women begged for him to strip in front of everyone.

Near her more reasonable roommates was Jane, who drank plain water as she didn't want to embarrass her brother while intoxicated. Dorothy was busy on her phone, and while she wouldn't admit, she was re-watching Katherine's performance and making notes about how well it went. They both winced as Anne expressed her determination to be like Miley Cyrus and make an entrance with a wrecking ball, with John sternly telling her off. His husband laughed, jokingly pointing to the chandeliers hanging above the guests.

Katherine was mingling with her former cousin-in-law, who was expressing concern about her relationship with Jane. She eventually ended the topic by indicating her reluctant support, and that Jane was a better cousin than Anne, who should've been serving a few jail terms given her tendency to get into trouble. Katherine laughed in agreement, then made an offhand comment that she wouldn't want to trade Anne or Anna for anyone else. The woman nodded, commenting that her bond with the two women mentioned were very strong and that they were lucky to have Katherine as a friend.

"Anna! I challenge you to a drinking contest!" Anne suddenly declared, which alarmed Catalina and Katherine as they didn't want a drunk Anne to ruin the wedding dinner. Anna gamely agreed to the challenge, which prompted John to start planning for the worst case scenario. Robert chuckled, asking the invited guests if they wanted to bet on the two women. "Okay, bring out the champagne!"

"This is going to end _so_ badly." Catalina muttered, loud enough for Catherine to hear. The latter shrugged, it was a no brainer that Anna would win hands down. While Anna always attributed her alcohol tolerance to her German heritage, it was still a fact that she could hold her own way better than Anne. The rest of their friends made their way towards them, worry on their faces as Catalina tried her best to calm herself down. "Jane, my girlfriend's going to ruin your brother's wedding and I'm sorry."

"That's alright, it's pretty obvious that Anna would win." Indeed, Anna could be heard taunting Anne. Katherine frowned, as much as she knew it was true, she held out hope that her cousin could out-drink Anna. When it became clear that Anne had zero odds of winning, Katherine decided to help her preserve some of her dignity. She tugged on Jane's sleeve, gaining her attention. "Oh, what is it Katherine?"

"I'm gonna get sloshed as fuck so bet on me."

"... You do understand that people bet on who they think are going to win right?" Katherine nodded, she had always wanted to attempt to out-drink Anna, but she was usually forced to remain sober so as to rein in the chaos that followed from her drunk best friends. "Are you sure you want to try out-drinking Anna?"

"Positive, plus I can finally strike something off my bucket list." Katherine said, striding up to her two best friends confidently. Jane was conflicted, on one hand she knew that she should stop her girlfriend from being part of the disaster that was sure to follow, but on the other hand, she wanted to support Katherine.

"Hey uh… Seymour? Is Howard supposed to be drinking when she's still seeing your therapist?" Catherine asked, genuinely concerned if Katherine was supposed to even drink. Catalina thought about the question posed to Jane, her eyebrows knitted as she tried to recall the materials taught during her first year.

"I'm not sure about it myself, I never asked Ms Blount about it…" Jane mumbled, quickly searching up the question on the internet. She let out a gasp as the search results indicated that alcohol shouldn't be consumed if prescriptions were taken, with one search result highlighting that the combination could worsen the patient's mental condition. "... Dear lord in heaven, please strike Anna with a stomach bug so that we can avoid the competition."

"We should stop them." Catalina bluntly said, with Jane and Catherine nodding in agreement. Unfortunately for them, the competition had started and their girlfriends were chugging down entire _bottles_ of champagne. They knew that it shouldn't deter them from snatching the bottles away, but they were too stunned by the sight. "Holy fuck, how is Kat outdrinking Anna?"

"Meanwhile your girlfriend's completely trashed." Catherine gestured to Anne, who was unconscious as a result of consuming four (actually three and a third) bottles of champagne. The two remaining women had just finished their fifth bottle, which shocked their friends as they had never once seen Katherine drink. "Good thing they're not the designated drivers."

"So far, there aren't any results saying that people who take antidepressants will die after drinking alcohol, which is a good thing. The bad news is that Katherine's going to be _extremely_ out of it if she's still conscious after the competition."

"This certainly isn't how I planned my wedding to be, but everyone seems to be having fun." Jane flinched, when did John appear beside her? He had a resigned smile on his face, and looked ten years older as a result of witnessing the chaos. "Will Ms Howard be alright?"

"Ha! In your face Anna!" The crowd went wild as Anna staggered back, waving an empty bottle to forfeit the competition. All three friends stared at Katherine, mixed emotions present in their eyes as Katherine blew a sloppy kiss in Jane's direction. Some went up to Robert to collect their winnings as they had changed their bet to Katherine at the last minute, while others groaned at their losses. "I'm the queen of drinking! Woo!"

"Oh sweet Jesus Jane, go collect Kat before she starts stripping."

"She's not Anne, but fair enough!"

* * *

"Urghhhhh, who invented mornings?" Anne groaned into the table, her hangover hurt like hell and all she wanted to do was to chop her head off just to get rid of the pain. Anna grunted in agreement, she had mostly recovered from her hangover on their way back from John's wedding last night, but there was still a dull ache in her head that simply refused to go away. "I'mma murder that bitch who wanted us up."

"First of all, it's already noon. Second of all, who the heck asked you two to start a drinking competition?!" Jane asked, serving her two roommates their lunches. Said roommates groaned back in response, it sounded like a fantastic idea to them hours ago. "Do you want some painkillers? There should be some in the house."

"Fuck painkillers, where's Kitty?"

"At the therapist." Jane replied, she recalled Katherine being her usual self earlier in the morning. There wasn't any sign of a hangover, and she was sober enough to turn down Jane's offer to bring her to the therapist. "By the way, does Katherine have a high tolerance towards alcohol?"

"Nein."

"Yep." Anna and Jane stared at Anne, who was still groaning about how she was better off without her head. Anne eventually stopped groaning 20 minutes later, lifting up her head from the table. "Oh god, don't tell me you girls have been staring at me for the past hour."

"It has been less than half an hour, but yes, we have."

"Urgh, what's there to be shocked about? Just because Kitty doesn't drink often doesn't mean she can't hold her weight. She's been drinking since like she was in primary school?"

"That's horrible! Alcohol can affect a child's development!" Jane protested, unable to believe that her girlfriend had been drinking at such a young age. Anna nodded, wincing as the sudden movement aggravated her headache. "Why did she even-"

"Her parents didn't pay their water bills, which means they drank everything _but_ water. Don't ask me why don't they pay their water bills when they could afford to do so." Anne grumbled, her head was still giving her headaches that made her want to chop her head off, but at least she wasn't hearing that annoying buzzing sound she had been hearing since she woke up. "Anyways, what happened after I blacked out?"

"We left the wedding early, and as soon as we got home, you seemingly woke up and tried to cook something. Do you know what's the worst part?"

"Please don't tell me I snogged you Janey, you're cute and all but like I don't wanna make Kitty cry and you're still related to me as much as I-"

"Today's lunch was made by you last night, and both Lina and Cathy said it was the best thing they had ever eaten." Jane was sobbing, not because Anne was better than her at cooking when she was drunk but because she could only cook something _when_ she was drunk. Anna took a bite of her scone, and immediately began stuffing more of her lunch into her mouth. "It was so horrifying…!"

"Holy shit, you're telling me that I become a goddess at cooking when I'm plastered?! Hot damn, I should get drunk more often!"

"Anne, just because you couldn't give two shits 'bout your liver doesn't mean that we don't." Anna remarked, licking her plate clean. Jane was still sobbing over how Anne could actually cook given the right conditions, and that she was so proud of her second cousin. "But like yeah, I remember that part. Afterwards, you volunteered to clean the whole fucking house."

"... You two are shitting me, you two are def shitting me right now."

"Okay yes, you conked out a second time _then_ you started cleaning the house." Anna admitted, soon explaining to Anne that while she was sleeping, she had single-handedly cleaned the house, watered Leafy, calculated the total amount of bills Jane needed to pay after including taxes, and woke the three functional women up at seven in the morning even though it was a Saturday. "The reason? You said that they were all beautiful and that beautiful people needed something nice to start their day."

"Lies! All of them are lies! I would _never_ wake someone up before three in the afternoon! They're all ugly except for Cat! You hear me?! Ugly!"

"About that… you should know that you filmed yourself waking the three of us up and posted it on your Instagram account..." Jane trailed off, no longer in tears over unconscious Anne's ability to be better than the conscious Anne in almost every way possible. Anne's face was soon drained of colour, brown eyes widened with horror that she had done something so unlike her while she was out cold. "If it's of any consolation, you got at least 300 likes and 754 comments as of 11 am?"

When Catherine came back from the bookstore, she was nearly deafened by an ear-splitting shriek from Anne as a result of the post Jane had mentioned.

* * *

**[NO GRANDMAS ALLOWED]**

_**[4.09 PM]** _

**Regrets &Coffee: **Okay, the coast is clear.

 **that boleyn girl:** lemme out

 **KweenCleves:** no

 **Regrets &Coffee: **No.

 **katsitter:** sorry the keys r in the toilet bowl

 **that boleyn girl:** wtfffff????

 **Regrets &Coffee: **It's to prevent Howard from unlocking the door.

 **Regrets &Coffee: **Back to the main topic, what should we do to congratulate those two?

 **KweenCleves:** give em cards

 **Regrets &Coffee: **Okay, what should we write in there?

 **KweenCleves:** tht they r formally invited to my surprise bd party ur all gonna throw for me

 **that boleyn girl:** bold of u to assume tht were planning one for u

 **katsitter:** yeaaaa tbh

 **katsitter:** i dun want a repeat of last yr

 **Regrets &Coffee: **What happened last year?

 **katsitter:** it was a hot mess

 **Regrets &Coffee: **What did you two set on fire?

 **that boleyn girl:** the fucking cake

 **that boleyn girl:** we ended up ordering one while passing tht black brick as a pet rock

 **KweenCleves:** wait is tht why charcoal disnatibgarted so easily????

 **katsitter:** u actually named it?

 **that boleyn girl:** lmao

 **KweenCleves:** shame me all u wanna but annes the creepist when it comes to naming her underwear

 **that boleyn girl:** ill yeet sexy steph n comfy carol at u once i get out

 **Regrets &Coffee: **Honestly, I thought we're just going to combine both of your birthdays together since they're just a few days apart.

 **that boleyn girl:** gasp how dare u

 **that boleyn girl:** as a cancer girl ill hv u kno tht im very senstiva

 **katsitter:** u dun hv cancer

 **Regrets &Coffee: **Will you stop entering my room without my knowledge?!

 **Regrets &Coffee: **No wonder my book was at the wrong horoscope!

 **KweenCleves:** wait which page were u at

 **Regrets &Coffee: **Leo.

 **Regrets &Coffee: **This is completely random but I went online to search for Henry VIII's birthday and guess when is it?

 **that boleyn girl:** january?

 **Regrets &Coffee: **Exactly the same day as Anna.

 **KweenCleves:** WHT

 **Regrets &Coffee: **It'll be really sad if the Henry we know has his birthday on Anna's birthday.

 **that boleyn girl:** uhhhhhhhhh

 **katsitter:** shld we tell anna

 **KweenCleves:** oh hell no

 **KweenCleves:** u gotta be lying

 **KweenCleves:** is this payback for telling u abt the shit u did while sleepiwaking

 **katsitter:** ur bd is the same as henrys…

 **KweenCleves:** NOOOOOOOOOO

 **Regrets &Coffee: **I'm so sorry about that Anna.

 **that boleyn girl:** do u wanna swap bds with me

 **that boleyn girl:** i mean we werent planning to tell u but since catherine brought it up

 **katsitter:** its cathys fault

 **that boleyn girl:** yea ngl its totes ur fault

 **Regrets &Coffee: **I'm a horrible girlfriend.

* * *

"I never thought I'll be saying this, but god, it's _so_ good to get away from them." Catalina sighed blissfully, sipping a cup of coffee with Jane seated opposite her. They were at a cafe near Jane's house, a brief respite from their roommates' antics. Catalina had a feeling that they wanted the two fourth-years out of the house anyways, which meant a win-win solution for all six of them. "If only Bo can make coffee like this…"

"What's wrong with my coffee?"

"It's not bad, just… well, it's not good either."

"Make your own coffee next time then." Jane said, staring into her cup of coffee. She wanted to get tea, but they didn't serve any at the cafe. Catalina took another indulgent sip of her coffee, pleased that she could have a minute to herself without having to deal with screaming matches.

"We're going to graduate in a few days, time really passes by without us noticing."

"... Yeah." Jane replied, her tone milder than usual. She let out a soft sigh, now that she would be graduating in a few days, what was she supposed to do? The sudden shift from university to the working world was huge, and Jane wasn't sure if she could cope. "Lina?"

"Yes Jane?"

"Do you think anyone would want to hire me?" Catalina blinked, Jane's grades were decent and she had spent her third year interning at a primary school as part of her curriculum. If anything, she could get herself easily hired given her experience as well as her personality. "It's just… do you think they'll hire someone who's mentally ill?"

"That's discrimination." Was all Catalina could say as Jane's words dawned on her. She could now understand her best friend's concerns, discrimination against people with mental health problems was a real problem in UK. Excluding Jane's PTSD, Jane's depression (Catalina was fairly sure Jane was diagnosed with that) would certainly stir alarm in schools. "All employers must comply with the Equality Act 2010, they can't just…"

"I know, but what if I start to act up during the day? What would happen to me once I'm finally off my prescriptions? Or worse, what if I can never stop taking them and I have to declare about it? I'm going to get a degree in Education, and newspapers are talking about how teachers have poor mental health after working for a while…"

"It's optional to declare your mental health condition."

"That's true but… I don't know Lina, it feels like I'm hiding some really huge secret from my potential employers if I don't tell them. Like what I've just said, what if I choose not to declare and because they think I'm normal, they start to push more work to me so as to help the other teachers who are dealing with their own problems and then I break down? That's just going to negatively impact them Lina, I can't do such a thing to them."

"Jane, how can you hope that your future employers won't discriminate against you when you're discriminating yourself?"

"What do you mean Lina?"

"You implied that people with mental illnesses are shameful. There's hardly any difference between you and me, and I don't see what makes other potential candidates better than you just because you're diagnosed with mental health problems. That's what they need to start doing Jane, to give those who are considered 'abnormal' in society a chance and to provide the support they need."

"... You're right. Still…"

"Jane, why don't we take this one day at a time? The concerning issue won't go away, but at least we can take today to care for ourselves." Jane nodded, gulping down her coffee with one shot and grumbled about how coffee never settled well with her. Catalina said nothing, a faint smile on her face as she sipped her coffee. "What time do you think we should return?"

"I thought you said that you wanted to have a whole day to yourself without dealing with our friends' messes?"

"I just realised that we left Catherine alone with those three."

"It'll be fine Lina, she's just as chaotic as them, maybe even more."

"That doesn't make it any better Jane."

* * *

**[henry viii's ex-wives]**

_**[6.39 PM]** _

**Regrets &Coffee: **Are we cooking for dinner?

 **J.S.:** Whose turn is it?

 **KweenCleves:** kats

 **KweenCleves:** urgh i dun want kfc again tho

 **that boleyn girl:** hard same

 **Mentally Dead:** You two are picky

 **KweenCleves:** uhhhhhhh u try eating kfc for dinner almost every day

 **J.S.:** I suppose we could have fish and chips for dinner?

 **Mentally Dead:** Jane, no

 **Mentally Dead:** Ever since we found out that you don't actually cook for yourself, you're banned from eating fish and chips

 **J.S.:** Grilled fish and mashed potatoes?

 **Regrets &Coffee: **Sounds good, can we get demi-glace sauce for the fish?

 **KweenCleves:** yea but kats not gonna cook

 **KweenCleves:** also how long does a tattoo take

 **Regrets &Coffee: **The tattoo artist said that Howard's tattoo would take 10 hours.

 **that boleyn girl:** wtf

 **that boleyn girl:** wait does hse hv money???

 **Regrets &Coffee: **She said that she could pay for her tattoo.

 **KweenCleves:** anne how much money do u hv

 **Mentally Dead:** She's probably in debt

 **J.S.:** I hope not, she still needs to pay me rent.

 **that boleyn girl:** i feel like janeys my pimp

 **Mentally Dead:** Work it Bo

 **that boleyn girl:** oh pls i can strip pretty well

 **KweenCleves:** only bc kat gave u lessons

 **J.S.:** I'm sorry, what?

 **Regrets &Coffee: **Wait, Howard has actually stripped before?!

 **that boleyn girl:** did she not tell any of u this

 **Mentally Dead:** Clearly not

 **KweenCleves:** oh fuck

 **that boleyn girl:** tbh it was her decision to work as a stripper

 **that boleyn girl:** actually did u kno tht she met henry there

 **KweenCleves:** gd thing she quit aft a few weeks

 **that boleyn girl:** didnt she quit bc of the no contact with customers policy

 **Mentally Dead:** So you two are telling me that a victim of sexual abuse willingly applied for a job at a strip club?!

 **that boleyn girl:** believe it or not yea…

 **that boleyn girl:** just so u kno i was against it

 **that boleyn girl:** bc of her history not bc of stupid morals

 **Mentally Dead:** Since when do you even have morals?

 **Regrets &Coffee: **… Does she know how to lap dance?

 **Mentally Dead:** I'm pretty sure everyone can lap dance better than you

 **J.S.:** I can't.

 **KweenCleves:** hv u tried

 **J.S.:** I've never done anything sexual in my life!

 **Mentally Dead:** Do you recall that one night we went over to our girlfriends' flat for film night but ended up watching porn and you got drunk?

 **J.S.:** I mean when I'm sober!

 **that boleyn girl:** ngl i wld pay money to see jany lap dance me

 **Regrets &Coffee: **I just asked Howard about her previous job as a stripper, she replied that she applied because the pay was good then.

 **Regrets &Coffee: **She also added that since men always wanted her to undress, she might as well get people to pay her to do so.

 **J.S.:** How does her tattoo look?

 **that boleyn girl:** dun tell me u wanna get matching ones

 **J.S.:** I don't want to get a tattoo?

 **Regrets &Coffee: **She says that it's a surprise.

 **Regrets &Coffee: **She's almost done anyways.

 **that boleyn girl:** im so scared tht its smth really expensive

 **Regrets &Coffee: **Tattoos are always expensive, why do you think I get ones without colour?

 **Mentally Dead:** That would explain why Kat only has two tattoos…

 **KweenCleves:** cant wait to see hows will look

 **that boleyn girl:** cant she pierce her ears like normal ppl

 **Mentally Dead:** Put a sock in it Bo

 **J.S.:** I read online that tattoos usually take a few sessions, why is Katherine able to get hers done in one?

 **Regrets &Coffee: **Because María is talented and also Katherine's not actually getting a tattoo sleeve.

 **Regrets &Coffee: **It's just on the outside, and it's only from her shoulder to her elbow area.

 **Regrets &Coffee: **If anything, the colours are the one making the session super long.

 **KweenCleves:** urgh ok

 **KweenCleves:** lets play suck it while waiting for them to come home

 **that boleyn girl:** imma crush cat

 **J.S.:** This will be fun!

 **Mentally Dead:** Lord have mercy on my soul...

* * *

"It's rare of you to invite me somewhere without Kitty or Catherine." Anne remarked as she followed Anna to a secluded building, not knowing what she was supposed to expect. Anne's eyes lit up as they passed by a sign, she had never visited an escape room before. Anna eventually came to a stop outside a metal door, a grin on her face as she waited for Anne to express her opinion. "Damn Anna, pulled out the stops for the little one eh?"

"You're by no means little, but yeah I figured that we don't really hang out much so what better way to foster some friendship than to panic in an escape room?"

"See, this is why you're one of us." Anne chuckled as she stared at the list of rules on a nearby poster, sighing as one of the rules stated for participants to not damage any property. How was she supposed to escape by throwing something heavy at a window now? "Y'know, I thought you'll bring Catherine to this."

"She's smart but I think she'll be tempted to stay in there for as long as possible. That, and I was planning to spend the day with _you_."

"Sounds romantic, and it certainly beats getting sloshed at a pub." They entered through the door, where someone was there to greet them. Anna informed the man that she had a booking under her name, with the staff member confirming that it was for two participants. Soon, they were locked in a spacious personal library after surrendering their phones to the staff member on duty. "You're definitely right 'bout Catherine not wanting to leave."

"I wonder if the books actually have content in 'em…" Anna muttered to herself as she went to a shelf and took out a random book, flipping through the pages before returning it to its original position. "I'm impressed, it's the real deal."

 _"Do you like my personal library? It's to die for, don't you think my pretties?"_ A disembodied voice was played through a hidden speaker, a signal that the time was about to start. _"I'm sure you both are curious about what you two are doing here, and I'll be happy to inform you that the two of you are lucky to participate in my game."_

"Hey Anna, did you sign us up for the serial killer escape or are we hunted by a demon?"

_"I prefer to be addressed as a game master rather than a serial killer, it is not my fault that participants tend to… prove that they're incompetent."_

"There's your answer Anne."

_"You have an hour to escape from my personal library, failure to do so would result in your tragic demise."_

"Uh huh, and how do we know how much time we have left? You can't expect us to trust you."

_"A game master is always prepared, my fair maiden. In front of you is a timer that will count down the time you have left. As a game master, I always like to address the concerns of participants before I commence the game. Now, do you have anything you wish to inquire on?"_

"Yeah so… why do you wanna kill us if we fail to escape within an hour? Like… just kill us?"

"Exactly, some of us are actually hoping to die."

"... Anne, are you okay? Do you need therapy too?" Anne shrugged, she preferred to declare that she wished to die in an attempt to dull herself to the panic the notion of death brought. It helped her to be less scared, even though it did nothing to numb her back when she thought that Katherine would die from her wound. "Anyways yeah, what's the point of making us play your game?"

_"I don't see the harm in having some fun in our dreary lives, unfortunately there are quite a few in the population that simply do not understand the thrill of challenges."_

"Basically, you wanna weed out the stupid people."

 _"I wouldn't phrase it so crudely, but essentially, yes. I must be off, ladies such as yourselves deserve the best way to go."_ Anne yawned, flopping onto a luxurious sofa as she observed her surroundings. There were numerous owl motifs in the form of statues and framed photographs, while the general surroundings indicated a life of luxury. Even the sofa felt luxurious, Anne thought.

"So… what should we do now?" Anna asked, glancing at the timer. They had slightly less than an hour to spare, which prompted Anna to take a seat beside her friend. She felt that they should start to find a way to escape, but she couldn't help feeling that they still had enough time to make it out.

"Dunno, we could just… talk? Or take a nap?"

"Talking's fine. Hmm…" Anna realised that she hardly talked to Anne without the presence of others, with Catalina being the friend that she had even lesser interactions with without Katherine or Catherine nearby. "So uh… I realised that Kat's probably the ones that brought us together."

"Agreed, if you didn't step into Holbein's back then, we probably wouldn't have met." Anne replied, it was clear that they ran in different social circles. She was considered fairly popular while Anna would be cooped up in a laboratory conducting experiments. Not to mention that their interests were different from each other, with Anna usually being swept up in Anne's mayhem. "Why did you go to Holbein's for lipstick anyway? It's fucking awful."

"I don't know actually, I was just wandering around back then. Maybe it's because of the German influences that appealed to me, who knows." Anna shrugged, she never really thought about why she visited Haus of Holbein of all places. She just entered the store because she felt like it, and had her fateful meeting with Katherine. "Why did you even visit the cafe I worked at when your taste buds are normal?"

"I was young, stupid, and also because I was looking for a place to hide from Cat. Your cafe's near the building where all the English majors have their classes, which is really far from where Cat has her Psych classes." Anne grinned, she had gotten herself beaten up for it once Catalina had found her, but that happened a good three hours later. "Not my fault she wore my knickers before shooing me out of her flat."

"Haha! That does sound like you!" Anna's laughter soon died down, her expression becoming stony. Anne didn't notice until her friend spoke in an uncharacteristically serious tone, implying that Anna wanted to ask her a serious question. "... Anne, why did you invite me to room with you and Kat then?"

"... Honestly?" Anna nodded, she wanted to hear the reason from Anne, something which she never once questioned because she was desperate back then. "There's this bitch at the dorm you used to stay that was spreading really harmful shit 'bout Cat, and I don't mean the 'I fucked the TA' kind. So I went to confront her, and I saw you getting bullied by your ex-roomies because of things you can't change. I wanted to offer you a place at our previous flat, but you ran off before I could. Then I started searching for you, and while I was looking for a place to hide from Cat, I saw you on shift."

"Why didn't you say anything back then?"

"I've zero idea why I didn't, I just… I dunno, maybe it was because Kitty took a liking to you during the Holbein video. Or maybe it's because I thought that you don't deserve being fucked over just because of your skin colour or height. There are a lot of things that I do while on auto-pilot, so even I don't have the answers at times."

"... Danke Anne. Du bist eine nette Person."

"I doubt I'm whatever you've just said, but it's no problem at all." Anne stood up, stretching her arms. The timer in front of them was still counting down, indicating that they had slightly less than 50 minutes left. "Let's start escaping, I've figured out where we should start anyways."

"Ja, let's do this."

* * *

**[NO GRANDMAS ALLOWED]**

_**[1.05 AM]** _

**katsitter:** omgggg

 **katsitter:** i cant believe i get to see my future aunt n uncle in laws

 **that boleyn girl:** stop making me nervous kitty

 **that boleyn girl:** is there still time look up how to act normal on wikihow

 **KweenCleves:** chill

 **KweenCleves:** not like catalinas folks r some royalty right

 **that boleyn girl:** yea but they probs expect her to date some respectable person like janey

 **Regrets &Coffee: **Believe it or not, you're pretty decent if you clean up.

 **Regrets &Coffee: **And by clean up, I mean wearing something that's not ripped jeans.

 **that boleyn girl:** u wouldnt kno style even if it hit u in the face hipster

 **that boleyn girl:** u can tell how ppl r like just by fashion alone

 **katsitter:** rlly???

 **katsitter:** press f to doubt

 **KweenCleves:** f

 **Regrets &Coffee:** F.

 **that boleyn girl:** fuxk u bitches

 **KweenCleves:** ok fine prove it to us

 **that boleyn girl:** lol sure

 **that boleyn girl:** eg catherine is a coffee addict tht comes off as charming but when u get to kno her shes just sociall awkward but nerdy cute

 **that boleyn girl:** anna is just super into fitness

 **that boleyn girl:** unless she wears a star top

 **that boleyn girl:** or a tracksuit tht has stars

 **KweenCleves:** my keys hv stars charms attached tho

 **that boleyn girl:** kittys fashionable n she likes to emphasise her sexuality which wtf why do u wear almost nothing during winter

 **katsitter:** hv u seen my legs?

 **katsitter:** theyre gorgeous af

 **that boleyn girl:** tht n she loves poink

 **katsitter:** POINK

 **katsitter:** MY NEW FAVOURUTE COLOOUR IS POINK

 **KweenCleves:** rofllllll

 **Regrets &Coffee: **What about the other two?

 **that boleyn girl:** cats conservative n likes to be neat

 **that boleyn girl:** may be a bit boring but her stable lifestyle provides ppl with a safe hrabour

 **KweenCleves:** i love how annes just selling her gf to us

 **katsitter:** i love how pink became poink

 **that boleyn girl:** n janeys an emo

 **KweenCleves:** LMAOOOOOOO

 **KweenCleves:** HOW IS SHE EMO??????

 **that boleyn girl:** she wears nothing but black white or grey

 **that boleyn girl:** omg wht if shes secretly a vampire

 **that boleyn girl:** sparkly hair n emo clothes

 **that boleyn girl:** HOLY SHIT SHES A VAMPIRE

 **katsitter:** lolllll

 **Regrets &Coffee: **You just couldn't think of anything for Seymour.

 **that boleyn girl:** i did

 **that boleyn girl:** professional neat boring

 **that boleyn girl:** depending on her clothes she cld be edgy

 **that boleyn girl:** permission to get her a trenchcoat ltr

 **katsitter:** wht no

 **katsitter:** we decided not to rmb

 **KweenCleves:** im getting nervous ltr

 **Regrets &Coffee: **Agreed.

 **katsitter:** ill miss seeing jane ard

 **KweenCleves:** but henrys graduating toooooo

 **katsitter:** yayyyyyy :D

 **that boleyn girl:** remind me again wht did we even see in tht loser

 **KweenCleves:** catalina was his sweetheart

 **KweenCleves:** u dated him bc he was interesting

 **KweenCleves:** janes unknown

 **katsitter:** jane dated him bc he was nice n also a gd cover for her gayness

 **KweenCleves:** lol did she ever admit tht last bit

 **Regrets &Coffee: **Yep, during the Valentine saga.

 **that boleyn girl:** our life sounds like a damn bk now

 **KweenCleves:** i didnt date him

 **that boleyn girl:** uh huh wht abt the messages u saved

 **Regrets &Coffee: **Liebling, you still have those messages?

 **KweenCleves:** srry i can delete em if ur not comfottatkne

 **Regrets &Coffee: **Fuck no, I want to laugh at his messages with you.

 **Regrets &Coffee: **If that's okay with you of course.

 **KweenCleves:** omg yes

 **KweenCleves:** gdi ily so much

 **katsitter:** see this us why ur voted as our most healthy couple

 **that boleyn girl:** hey mines was enemy to lover

 **katsitter:** sure

 **katsitter:** i dated him bc he was kinda gd at talking n i thot he was 19

 **that boleyn girl:** u met him at a fucking strip bar

 **that boleyn girl:** is tht not a red flag

 **katsitter:** ill hv u kno tht theres a story abt musical u meeting musical cathy at a fucking strip bar

 **Regrets &Coffee: **Actually, it's at a burlesque club.

 **katsitter:** same diff!

 **Regrets &Coffee: **They are similar but not exactly the same.

 **that boleyn girl:** why tf r u reading abt us

 **KweenCleves:** technically ur not stripper anne

 **katsitter:** yea n ur stripping needs some work

 **Regrets &Coffee: **Is she still taking lessons from you?

 **katsitter:** yea

 **Regrets &Coffee: **Can I take lessons from you too?

 **KweenCleves:** hhhhhhhhhh imma get a nosebleed at this rate

 **KweenCleves:** also teach me kat

 **that boleyn girl:** no stop get in line bitches

 **katsitter:** stripping is helpful :D

 **katsitter:** btw cathy did u actually like henry

 **Regrets &Coffee: **Absolutely fucking not.

 **Regrets &Coffee: **I sought him out because he has five exes.

 **Regrets &Coffee: **Which by the way, I didn't know it was all of you.

 **that boleyn girl:** cat nvr told u?

 **Regrets &Coffee: **The conversation never really came up…?

 **KweenCleves:** ok so ltr try not to get into troubl everyone

 **katsitter:** yepppp

 **katsitter:** jane seems nervous for ltr tho

 **that boleyn girl:** i wld be too if im graduating n not kno abt my job prosevts

 **KweenCleves:** omg same

 **Regrets &Coffee: **Huge mood, thought that's because I'm not sure if any of my stories would take off…

 **katsitter:** bitch im nervous abt myself too

 **that boleyn girl:** u still hv yrs to worry

 **that boleyn girl:** i cant believe im saying this but im legit considering being a teacher

 **Regrets &Coffee: **Oh dear god.

 **KweenCleves:** press f for annes future students

 **Regrets &Coffee: **I wish I could spam, but no amount of praying will save them.

 **Regrets &Coffee: **F.

 **KweenCleves:** f

 **katsitter:** fffffffffffffffffffffffffffff

 **that boleyn girl:** fuck u all

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The Burlesque!AU ParrLeyn story mentioned by Katherine and Catherine is actually 'Everybody Here Wants You' by littlebitlostandfound. It's actually an enjoyable read, so do check it out if you're a fan of ParrLeyn.


	22. Chapter 22

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Happy New Year (Eve), time to torture you guys for the last time.

Jane was surprised when she met her non-graduating friends, she didn't expect them to be so unlike themselves. First of all was Catherine, who was dressed as though she was attending an interview after the ceremony was over. The English major was wearing a long sleeved silk blue blouse along with a pencil skirt, and even went as far as to wear a pair of high heels. The second of all was Anna, who wasn't wearing her usual sporty attire. Instead, she was wearing a grey suit with a muted red top underneath her blazer. Jane didn't know why they were dressed so formally, but she didn't plan to question them.

Anne was even more concerning in Jane's opinion, the third-year was dressed in a black miniskirt as well as a green flannel blouse that she was sure that belonged to Catherine. Anne's neatness wasn't the most concerning part. The most concerning part was how her second cousin (she hated that term) _didn't_ start a mass panic five minutes after entering the lecture hall where the official ceremony took place. Anne was all smiles and was polite to everyone who approached her, regardless who they were. To sum it up, Anne was acting like a normal person and that worried Jane.

"Jane, are you okay? You've been staring at cuz for a while now." Katherine broke her out from her thoughts, a tender smile on her face as she reached out to squeeze Jane's hand. The gesture brought some comfort to the soon-to-be graduate, at least Katherine was acting like her normal self. Only Katherine remained in casual clothes, and she wasn't acting in a concerning manner. Her pink eyes glistened with curiosity, her smile never leaving her face. "Congratulations Jane."

"Shouldn't you save the well-wishes until I actually get the certificate?"

"I wanna congratulate you for coming this far, for making so much progress, for putting up with us, for anything and everything really." Katherine started, her hand still squeezing Jane's except it was slightly tighter. "I love you Jane, and while that's not something to celebrate about given our _other_ relationship, I want you to know that even if the whole world's against you, I'll always be there."

"... Thank you Katherine." Jane wasn't sure how she should respond to the heartfelt words other than a simple grateful comment, but Katherine's eyes lit up as though she was being praised. In a way, she was. The dean made her way to the podium, announcing to the graduates as well as the non-graduates that she would be distributing the degrees soon. Jane's grey eyes scanned through the crowd, finally locating Catalina with two older adults. Anne was nearby, clearly a nervous wreck given her expression. _'Oh, so that's why Anne's acting strange…'_

* * *

Anne was _extremely_ nervous, she couldn't recall a moment that she had felt this way. The closest was when she confessed to Catalina at the fountain on Valentine's Day, and it wasn't on the same level as her current emotions. She now knew why people dreaded meeting their significant others' parents, and was currently questioning why Catalina agreed to date her when she was such a mess.

"So... this is my girlfriend Anne Boleyn. Anne, these are my parents." Catalina introduced the three of them, with Anne flinching underneath the narrowed glare of her girlfriend's father. Her mother nodded curtly, indicating her disapproval. Anne was sweating heavily, she didn't know that the parents disapproved of her _that_ much.

"This is… the woman that stole your ex from you, isn't she?" The man asked, his voice gruff and hostile. Catalina nodded briskly, ignoring her father's tone. She expected as much, given that she had constantly told them about how Anne stole Henry from her during her second year. "... Why her?"

 _'Yeah Cat, why me?'_ Anne gulped, if she played her cards right, she would be staring at her future-in-laws. She wasn't sure if that was supposed to be a good thing or not, but she loved Catalina dearly, so she decided that she would make Catalina happy even if it meant having dinner with the parents.

"Because I love her, what kind of a question is that?"

"Your mother and I have some reservations about you dating a woman… but we had hoped it was someone with some… decency."

"And you think Bo isn't decent enough?" Catalina challenged, irritated that her parents doubted her. She knew that they had a reason to doubt her dating preferences, given that she had dated Arthur and Henry, both who weren't exactly the best boyfriends she had. And there was Anne, who visited the police station more often than they could count. "I love Bo, she's a hot mess sure, but she also has one of the kindest hearts I've ever met. She cares about people more than she lets on, and while she sometimes still has her walls up, she'll always have her friends' backs even if they don't deserve it."

 _'That's Kitty but okay I'll take it.'_ Anne thought to herself, she felt as though she was receiving a stern reprimand from the parents even though Catalina's father simply questioned his daughter's reasons for choosing Anne as a girlfriend.

"By the way, if you're talking about decency, Bo _does_ have some. Why else do you think she's dressed up like a functioning person?! I know I bitch about her to you two a few years back, but she's not a bad person. She has the capacity to care for others, and also the desire to impress the two people her beloved cares about. So please, give her a chance."

"... Very well." Anne breathed a sigh of relief, the man's glare softened to show that he was giving Anne a chance. Catalina's mother made no pains to hide her disapproval, though she was polite enough to curtly nod in Anne's direction once more. "Tell me Ms Boleyn, what do you like about our daughter?"

"... Um. It's a really long list and also contains some personal info that I don't wanna share so early to our meeting so…" She locked eyes with Catalina, who nodded and was prepared to step in to help her girlfriend. Anne decided that she should face the parents head on, even though she was scared shitless for the fourth time in her whole life. "How much time do you have?"

"The whole day." Anne nodded shakily, trying her best to not word-vomit in front of Catalina's parents and also embarrassing her girlfriend in the process. She looked at them straight in the eyes, her words not wavering by the time she managed to force them out.

"Cat always have our interests at heart, and always stops me whenever I'm about to do something stupid. She always takes good care of us to the point that we sometimes think of her as our mother, and honestly? We appreciate her for it because it's not easy juggling five women's lives while focusing on her own, and she's no way obligated to do so yet she still does. We've met each other while Henry was cheating on her with me, but even so, she has supported me through the harder parts of my life despite our history. Cat genuinely cares for all of us, and would lay down her life even though ours aren't worth shit. She's kind and patient with us, and I don't know what the fuck I did in my past life to deserve your daughter."

"... Bo, you're supposed to end it off with 'but I love her anyways'."

"Honey, sweetie, darling, whatever cheesy as fuck nickname normies give each other, I'm _this_ close to shitting my pants, you think I'm gonna tell 'em something that it's so blindingly obvious?"

"Fair point, also calling me 'dearest shithead' or something along those lines is romantic enough for me." Her father coughed, reminding his daughter that they were still present. Catalina grinned back at them, pulling Anne into a tight hug. He sighed, he could see that he was being unfair toward Anne by intimidating her from the start. "I love her dearly, and she loves me."

"... Isabella? What do you think?"

"... Not bad." Catalina let out a heavy sigh that she had been holding, relieved that her parents approved of Anne. Or at least, were willing to give Anne chances to change their minds. Her parents nodded politely, faint smiles on their faces as Anne passed out from stress.

_'I got my degree, my parents kind of approved Bo, said girlfriend didn't set anyone on fire, this is the best graduation ceremony ever!'_

* * *

Jane was busy telling her girlfriend, Catherine and Anna a few puns, with them groaning good-naturedly in response. Catalina shortly made her way towards them, dragging a limp Anne with some effort. They all raised their eyebrows, before Katherine cheered and told the rest to pay up. Catalina watched with bemusement as the three women sullenly slapped Katherine's outstretched hands with wads of cash, an indication that they had lost a bet.

Anne soon regained consciousness, and Catalina informed her that she had made a positive impression on her parents, which greatly relieved the third-year. Her friends smirked, having watched her exchange with Catalina's parents from afar. Anne soon noticed that Katherine had a huge wad of cash in her hands, as well as the disgruntled expressions on her friends' faces. Katherine explained that they had made a bet on whether Anne would faint after meeting Catalina's parents, with Catalina smirking at the bet.

Before Anne could swear at her friends for making a bet on her, two older adults had approached them, their grey eyes an indication to who they are related to. Unlike Jane, their eyes reflected tense discomfort, bordering on silent hostility. The woman's eyes reflected her sentiments more clearly than the man beside her, but it was implied that the man's discomfort was equal to hers. Jane was the last one to notice, given that they had approached the group from behind. Catalina directed her attention to the two adults, worry concealed behind her own hazel eyes.

"Mum, Dad. How do you know that today's my graduation ceremony?" Jane asked, she certainly didn't make it a point to inform the Salisbury Seymours (a term Dorothy had coined to differentiate the Seymours' opinions) about her ceremony. John and Henry were unable to attend due to work, while Dorothy was still in Salisbury packing up the last of her things to bring to London. Thomas wasn't able to attend as he was finally in jail over charges of possession of child pornography.

"We heard about it from Dorothy, she expressed that she wanted to attend your graduation ceremony." Jane's mother explained, her eyes warily staring at Jane's friends. She was wary towards Katherine the most, notably because of her dyed hair and unnatural pink eyes. "Are these your friends…?"

"Oh, I'll introduce them! This is Catalina, Anne, Catherine, Anna and…" Jane locked eyes with Katherine, silently asking her how she wanted to be introduced. Katherine responded with a subtle nod of her head as well as a faint reassuring smile, indicating that she would support Jane in any way. "This is my girlfriend, Katherine."

"I'm sorry, did you just say that she's your girlfriend?!" Her mother asked, shock and horror evident in her words. Her father said nothing, his lips curling into a displeased frown. Jane felt like running away, she feared the crippling rejection from her parents, who were supposed to be supportive of her decisions. She faced her parents, a steely gaze present in her eyes as she stood up to her parents. "This is a sin Jane, you know that. A woman sleeping with another woman… that's unnatural."

"You don't get to tell me what's unnatural or not. If anything, there's nothing wrong with same-sex relationships." Jane replied, hiding her fears behind a confident tone. Katherine sensed that Jane would prefer some support, and as such took a step closer towards her girlfriend but not touching her, out of concern that the Seymours would turn aggressive if they saw their daughter holding hands with another woman in a romantic light. "I'm not in love with Katherine because she's a woman, I'm in love with Katherine who just so happens to be a woman. The Bible doesn't state anything wrong about being in love with someone."

"You seem to have forgotten 1 Corinthians 6:9 to 11."

"Then what about 1 Peter 4:8? Katherine and I love each other deeply, and what's so wrong with that? There's nothing wrong with being in love."

"Leviticus 18:22 states that homosexuality is abhorrent Jane."

"That verse says _nothing_ about homosexuality between women!"

"London has changed you Jane." Jane's father, who had been quiet until then, calmly said. His words were measured, acknowledging Katherine by glancing in her direction. "Perhaps you can enlighten us where we have gone wrong."

"What do you mean by that?" Jane asked, there were a lot of things that she could use as examples, but they weren't 'wrong'. It simply affected how she grew up to be the Jane her friends knew. Her parents glanced at each other, exchanging their opinions over intense staring before directing their attention back to their daughter.

"We mean with your… romantic preferences." In a way, Jane was relieved that her sexual orientation was her parents' main source of concern. She didn't want to explain to her parents how their indirect neglect had affected her personality, that she ended up being an attention seeker in her own way as well as being extremely sensitive to rejection. Or that Katherine was her cousin, that would open up a new tin of worms and not the pleasant kind. "What ever happened with that boy you dated? He's a nice man."

"Henry was a fucking manipulator who's also a damn cheater." Everyone gasped, they hadn't heard Jane swear in real life before. Jane scowled, previously the thought of Henry reminded her of how she was a failure even though she ended up getting a restraining order against him. Now, the thought of her ex-boyfriend stirred rage in her. "Besides, I didn't truly love him."

"What has London ever done to you?! You've… you've changed! You're not the Jane we knew."

"No Mum, I didn't change. I'm still the same Jane as I was back in Salisbury, I just didn't show it. The Jane that you claim you knew… that wasn't the real me. I'm not who you think I am, everything you knew about me are just lies."

"... And you couldn't continue living that lie?" The man asked, angering Jane's friends. Katherine was the most angered among them, she couldn't believe that Jane's parents would rather Jane continue living in a lie just to conform to their beliefs. Jane shook her head calmly, though her grey eyes bore a storm brewing. "I don't understand, did something happen to you here?"

"Yes, but not what you're thinking of. I managed to change for the better because of my friends, I realised that it was okay for me to open up and be myself. I realised that I don't have to please everyone just to keep myself sane, I realised that it's okay to be in a bad place and that there are friends who are willing to be there with me."

"What do you mean 'sane'? What happened to you?"

"Dad… I'm… it's not easy to say this, but my mental state isn't exactly stable. I'm still on prescriptions, and I still wake up on some nights with fright while my mind repeats what I saw then."

"You're an abomination, I don't recall raising a daughter like you." Jane wondered if her father was trying to be on her side, he wasn't as aggressive as his wife, even though his opinions were similar. She had expected as much from her parents, but having the conversation was still dreadful in her opinion.

"... You didn't raise me at all Mum. I was forced to grow up because for _some_ reason, I was seen as the most responsible child and that meant neglecting me! Why in heaven's name did you two think that not remembering me was a good idea?! Did any of you ask me how my day was back then?! Did you even ask what I wanted for Christmas?! Did you, oh I don't know, maybe attempt to surprise me on my birthday or at least ask me what I wanted then?! Do you even remember when's my birthday?!"

"Jane, show us some-"

"Respect? Maybe I will, when you start being decent parents! Do you know what I realised after attending therapy? I realised that what I grew up with could be considered child abuse in the form of neglect! Yes, you did invest some amount of love while bringing me up, but other than that, I felt like no one really paid attention to me! Funny enough, the family member that cared about me the most happens to be the one that I practically imprinted on!"

"Your father bought you the house that you currently live in!"

"Material possessions don't change the fact that I'm fucked up Mum. If you asked me how was secondary school, I would've broken down in front of you and said that it was awful. I would probably have told you that due to reasons that I didn't want to disclose, almost everyone in school was treating me like some diseased person. Actually you know what? I'm glad you never asked, at least I wouldn't have to deal with this conversation back then. Because you know something? I bet right now, you're just seeing me as some freak that's somehow related to you."

"Marge, let's just go. Clearly, Jane isn't going to listen to us or change her mind." Jane's father eventually said, realising that the tension in the air attracted too much attention to them. Jane's mother scoffed, storming off. It was clear to everyone present that relations between mother and daughter were beyond repair. Jane's father stared at Katherine, his eyebrows knitted together as he carefully voiced out his thoughts. "Katherine, was it?"

"Y-Yes sir?"

"... I don't approve of your relationship with my daughter, but I can tell she has an… _unhealthy_ adoration for you. So… please treat her in kind, and give my regards to John's… legally-binding obsession. That will be all." With that, the man walked away, leaving his daughter behind with her friends as well as a crowd. Anne scowled at the crowd, yelling at them to back off. Anna did the same, minus the scowling. Jane started laughing, startling her friends given the outcome.

"I did it! Haha! I actually did it! It's so… liberating! Now I get why Anne simply can't keep her thoughts to herself!"

"Janey, I love you in a hateful kinda way, but you're this close to losing that love."

* * *

"So once again, congrats on both of your graduation!" The six women were currently at a family restaurant, with the non-graduates treating the two women to a late lunch. Jane and Catalina smiled back, grateful that they didn't have to pay for their own meals. "By the way Jane, bist du in Ordnung?"

"What?"

"She's asking if you're okay." Catherine felt that Duolingo was a blessing, without it she wouldn't understand what Anna said in German. Anna nodded, as though she had just spoken in English. Anne and Katherine didn't comment on Anna's words, they could kind of guess what Anna wanted to say given the confrontation earlier. Not to mention that they were used to Anna unconsciously slipping in German with the latter not realising that neither of them actually understood the language. "Seymour, how do you feel?"

"Honestly? I feel lighter, like there's a weight off my back. I mean… yeah you girls know most of it, but I think I was still trying to please my parents in some way. And even now, I'm not sure if what I did just now was right. What if I was wrong, that the reason my childhood was like that was because I didn't reach out to them, that I didn't make an effort to make my wants known?"

"Jane, you were just a child. A child's development is dependent on their environment, which includes the parent's parenting style. They may have loved you, but how they showed it was considered neglect. Just because you didn't end up like JD doesn't mean you're any less of a victim… wait, can we consider that sociopath a victim?"

"To a certain extent, yes." Catherine shrugged, JD could be a victim _and_ the aggressor. It was clear from how he manipulated Veronica into staying in the relationship, as well as his insistence that he was right and the world was his enemy. "Did your therapist say if you're allowed to drink slushies again?"

"Oh yes! She said that I can only have one per month for now, but I think today's a good day to have it!" Jane beamed, she could finally sate her slushie cravings. That didn't mean that she would stop trying to wean Catherine off coffee, the amount said roommate consumed was too much to even be considered normal. "Anyways, I don't think I'll be telling them some things."

"For example?"

"Hmm… I'm not sure really, maybe the fact that I self-harmed back in secondary school?" The casual reply stunned her friends, they weren't expecting such a reveal. Jane noticed the expressions on her friends' faces, and decided to ask them about it. "Oh, did I not tell any of you about it?"

"Uh, no?! I mean, yeah you have a right to not tell us but that was _way_ too casual!" Anne shot back, did Jane actually believe that she had mentioned it at some point? Katherine was the first one to recover from the shock, mostly because she could imagine Jane doing it as a way to cope. "Holy shit, are you still-"

"I stopped years ago."

"Does your therapist know about it?" Jane shrugged, given her friends' responses, she wasn't sure if she had told anyone about it. She couldn't remember if she had informed her therapist about it, and was genuinely worried if she should mention it lest it meant an extended slushie ban. Catalina sighed, shaking her head as she glanced at the menu. "Okay, we should order something first _then_ revisit that conversation."

"Wait, you mean you're not my meal for the day?"

"Bo, what the fuck. We agreed on not having sex in the public toilet." Anna coughed out her water, pounding on her chest furiously while Catherine muttered the few prayers she remembered from her childhood. Katherine sighed, disappointed but not surprised at her cousin's reply. She leant in closer to Jane, whispering a question that she had always wanted to ask but never did.

"Jane, did you do it on your right thigh?"

"Oh, so I _did_ tell you?"

"No, I felt that it was strange of you to slap my hand away last Christmas." Jane nodded, she did remember slapping Katherine's hand away upon contact. "Why there?"

"I can easily hide them, and it's high enough such that people won't look. Unless I'm having… actually no, Henry didn't notice it either."

"Were you scared that I would find out back then?"

"This is why I said that you've got me all figured out." Jane smiled reassuringly, not minding the conversation in the slightest. A few months ago she would, but now… Jane felt that it was easier to breathe. That she could relax when it came to topics that she was brought up to avoid, that it was okay to say things that was not expected of her. "Katherine, I'm glad that you sought me out back when I dropped my card. Otherwise, I don't think we could have what we have today."

"That's true, Cathy and Anna would probably never interact with each other once the cafe closed and Lin-Lin… actually you know what, I think those two might end up together."

"Ja ja, but you're there to give Anne a kick in her arse to get her shit together." Anna sputtered out, just recovering from the shocking detail about her friends' sex life. Katherine and Jane grinned, Anna had a point. "So what will you have?"

"Hmm, I think I'll get a strawberry soda." Jane winked, the meaning lost on Anna while Katherine chuckled at the order. Anna eventually managed to flag down a waitress, listing their orders while guessing Anne's and Catalina's given that they were still arguing. Katherine hummed a joyful tune as Jane leant on her shoulder, enjoying the chaos that constituted the six women's friendship.

"God damn you Bo, why do you always have to reveal our private lives to the rest?!"

"Not my fault that you always set yourself up for a good one!"

"Ladies, please. Do _not_ start your foreplay here."

"Oh fuck off Catherine, go kiss Anna or something!" Anne flipped Anna off, then proceeded to flip her second cousin off. "This is for flipping me off on your birthday, bitch!"

"You sure hold grudges huh?" Jane joyfully returned the favour, with Anne screeching at the sight while Katherine responded in kind just for the sheer hell of it. Soon, the rest joined in, realising that it was a fun way to make Anne lose her shit. _'I didn't expect a chance meeting to unravel everything, but Katherine, I'm glad that I met you. Otherwise, I don't think I'll get to live today in all its chaotic glory.'_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> 1\. Is it possible for Jane's father's opinion towards Katherine and John's husband to change overtime based on the conversation held with Jane?


End file.
